Hesitation

HEARTBEAT

 

 

 

 

 

I stared at the clock on the wall and tapped my pencil on the desk, waiting for the bell to ring. It was math class--my least favorite subject. Sooyoung’s little story was lingering around in my head the whole time, making it harder for me to focus. I looked around the classroom to check what everyone else was doing. Neither Lay nor Taemin was in the class, so I didn't really have anyone to talk to except Sooyoung, who was placed in just about all the same classes as I. Problem was, we didn’t sit anywhere near each other in any of them.

 

I saw Taemin in the morning, but I haven't seen Lay the whole day. "Okay. Does anyone have any questions about the homework," my teacher asked. He looked around and sighed. Not a lot of students were paying attention to him. *Riiinnggg!!* Everyone packed their things up and stood behind their chair. When the teacher dismissed us, we bowed to him and left the classroom. I walked to Sooyoung and grinned. “You ready to see my house?” My phone rang before she was able to respond to me. She smiled and gestured me to answer it. "Hello?" "Yerim! Are you busy," Taemin was breathing heavily. "I think I can stay for a few minutes." "Okay...Good. Can you come to the dance room? I wanna show you something." I peered over at Sooyoung sitting on top of her desk. "Yeah sure. I'll be there in a few."

 

As soon as I hung up, my heart squeezed painfully again. My conversation with Sooyoung earlier began orbiting my brain once more. She looked up at me and smiled. “Go. Sungjae is waiting for me outside. Maybe we’ll visit another day.” She took her bag and left the room, leaving me by myself.

 

I sped walked over to the dance room but before I could get there, I heard music playing from one of the rooms. Everything in my head was pushed away and I began walking toward the room where the music was coming from. The music was getting louder and louder. When I arrived in front of the room, I saw a brown haired boy sitting down playing the piano. I couldn't quite recognize who it was at first but as I got closer, the person began to look more familiar. The music made my heart feel warm and I felt as though I was an ice-cream melting on a hot summer day. It was mesmerizing and I felt so lost in it. When the music stopped, I found myself standing in front of the boy. I made eye contact with the person and felt my heart starting to beat faster. I gulped my saliva and smiled.

 

"Lay...I haven't seen you the whole day. Where were you?” He chuckled and stood up from the chair. My eyes grew as he walked closer to me. It was weird. It felt as though I haven't seen him in years! And there he was, making my heart beat faster. He placed his right hand on my head and smiled warmly. "Did you like it," he asked. "What?" "Did you like the song?" "Oh yeah. It was great," I beamed. "Have you ever played the piano before,” he asked, as he stood behind me. "N-no. But I've always wanted to try learning how to--." He nodded and gently placed a hand on my back. I felt electric shocks flowing through my entire body. He led me to the chair in front of the piano and made me sit down.

 

"I'll teach you," he said softly. I looked behind me and nodded my head to him. He wrapped his arms around me and took my hands. He placed my hands on the keys of the piano and made me loosen the tension on my fingers. His hands were on top of my hands, directing them to the keys. I stared at them closely--his hands hiding mine. He directed my fingers on the keys, one by one. When he finished teaching me the basics of the piano, he helped me play the song he was playing earlier. Lay started singing along to the sound of the piano. Listening to his voice perfectly correlate with the singing of the instrument made me smile and feel at peace. He sang with emotion and the tone in his voice felt so soothing.

 

“Don’t hesitate anymore please

Take my heart away

Yes, the sharper it is, the better

Even the moonlight shut its eyes tonight

If only it was a different guy and not me

If only it was a line from a comedy

I will burn all of the scars

Exchanged with your love

Baby don’t cry tonight~”

 

When he finished singing, I turned my head. My eyes grew when I saw his face so close to mine.

 

---Taemin---

Taemin danced by himself and repeated it over and over again, reviewing his movements. Sweat dripped down his entire body as he pushed himself to dance harder, preparing to show me what he’d choreographed. He checked the time on the clock a couple of times, waiting for me to come. His eyelids started to feel heavy. His arms and legs felt weaker and weaker as he kept pushing himself to continue dancing. When his legs finally gave up, he stumbled down on the floor. He took his phone out of his pocket and checked if I left any message. Nothing... He tried standing from the floor but he was still unable to get up. Taemin finally gave in and shut his eyes, trying to catch his breath.

 

---You---

*Riinnggg.Riiinnggg.* Lay backed up from me and breathed out. I bit my lip before answering. "Hello?" "Yeri. Where are you?" "Mom! I'm still at school. W-why?” "Your dad is back from his business trip and he wants us to go somewhere right now. Come quickly understand?" "Oh...Okay. I got it. Can you get Mr.Moon to pick me up?" "Yeah I'll send him out for you right now. Hurry okay?" "Okay...Bye." I tilted my head, confused of why she spoke in such haste. Perhaps she was probably just excited. I stuffed my phone in my bag and stood up from the chair. All of a sudden, I’d remembered... *TAEMIN!!!* I panicked and quickly said bye to Lay. I ran to the dance room and found Taemin lying down on the floor with one arm over his eyes.

 

"Taemin...." Guilt surged all over me. I suddenly felt so small. Taemin took his arm off his face and looked up at me. He tried to sit himself up and winced in pain. He slowly lifted his legs, but fell back down. I ran over to him and took his arm around my shoulders, holding onto his waist to support him. "What did you do? No...what did I do?!" His forehead was filled with sweat and he looked really weak. He forced a smile on his face but ended up coughing. He coughed a couple of times, leaving me worried. I led him to a bench and sat him down. I rummaged through my bag to look for something to wipe the cold sweat off his forehead and found the handkerchief Lay gave me. Without hesitating, I took it out and wiped the sweat off of his forehead.

 

Lay left the room and closed the door behind him. He was headed home when he saw me sitting on the bench, wiping Taemin's forehead. He stared at us, stepping forward, but he stopped himself and walked away.

 

"I'm so sorry Taemin. I was completely out of my mind. I couldn't think straight." "I'm fine," he smiled at me. “I’m just glad you’re here now…” Instead of making me feel better though, it made me feel even more guilty for forgetting. "What happened? How’d you end up like this?" I searched his face worriedly. "Nothing. I was just dancing," he chuckled. My heart squeezed once more, but this time, it was much more painful. *He was dancing the whole time...Just waiting for me to come.* I sighed and continued wiping his forehead but he held onto my wrist, stopping me. I stared up at him as he took a deep breath. "Yerim, I have something to tell you--" *Riiinnggg* My phone rang and he gestured me to take the call. I took my phone out and answered. "Hello?" "Ma'am. I’m outside the school's main entrance right now." "Oh, I see. I'll be right there." I looked over at Taemin. "I...I have to go." "It's okay." "I'm so sorry. What were you gonna tell me?" He chuckled to himself and shook his head. "It..it was nothing." I stood up to leave, but paused. "Well, let me take you home."

 

I carried all of his things and took his arms over my shoulders again. "Ma'am?" "Dong Moon! Can we take him to his house?" "Yes ma'am. But your mother would like you to be at home right now." "Alright. Just make sure to get him home safely."

 

--10 minutes later--

"Oh! You’re finally here! Quick! Come now~" My mother took my arm and walked up the stairway in haste. "Mom..." I stopped her from continuing up the stairs and she turned to look back at me. She raised a brow and found Taemin standing behind me. "Oh my, who--?" Taemin bowed down to her even though he was still in pain. "Hello ma’am. I’m Lee Taemin." My mom smiled and did the thing with her eyes--as if she was suggesting something. My face was still plastered with a worried look but I caught her. “Not again." "I'm just teasing darling. Go put the dress inside your room on now. We have to leave in 5 minutes~" she sang excitedly. "Dong Moon is taking Taemin home." “That’s fine then.” She nodded her head and swayed her hands at me.

 

I began to walk up the stairs, but turned around and ran back to Taemin. I hugged him, still  guilty of what I’d done. A smile crept up his face and he hugged me back tightly, enduring the pain he felt. "I'm sorry again Taemin." "I'm fine. Don't worry abut me..." My mom smiled at the sight. Once we broke off, I walked up the stairs and headed to my bedroom to change my clothes. Meanwhile, my mom talked to Taemin before letting him off. "How is my daughter? Is she nice? Smart?" "She gets forgetful at times but other than that, she is a very wonderful, caring, beautiful woman.” "I'm glad she has great friends like you. Please look after her for me...You know, her father and I weren’t always there for her especially when she was younger. She needs people that would take good care of her." "I will. Don't worry ma'am." My mom sighed and patted Taemin’s shoulder. "It's getting late. Your parents might be worried about you. Come visit us again sometime." "Surely...Thank you."


Taemin bowed and got in the car. I came down the stairs, struggling to put my high heels on. I was trying to catch up before Taemin left, but the car was already leaving. I stood beside my mom and finally got my heels on. She laughed at me and fixed my hair. "Hey...You're in trouble," she teased. "Why?" "You have two handsome boyfriends." I stared at her in disbelief. "Mom." "Why? I'm saying the truth aren't I?" "....." "Let's go your dad is waiting."

 

 

 

 

"A moment of hesitation,

may cause you a lifetime of regrets."

~Ukn

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Kurosawa_Shizuka #1
Chapter 9: Ohhh damnn! Everyone be giving her gifts, except Taeminnie ;-; I wonder what's up with Eunji, keep writing! <3 Hwaiting~~~
Kurosawa_Shizuka #2
Chapter 7: I wonder what's wrong with them ;-; The siblings are so mysterious, it bothers me ahaha xD Poor Lay, he's getting depressed and stuff, update soon!
Kurosawa_Shizuka #3
Chapter 6: Damn. Damn. A new rival comes along. Wasn't two already a problem!? Ahhhh I wonder how this will go, seems like Byunghun already likes Yerim a bit, hmmmm. Can't wait! Update soon! ^-^
Kurosawa_Shizuka #4
Chapter 5: Omo what a beautifully written fanfic :) I can't wait until the next update! I have one question though, author-ssi! Are you already set on the person Yerim ends up with? If it is, I really hope it's Taemin <3 He's my ultimate bias, but I like Lay as well so I won't be disappointed either way! Continue with the amazing writing! Hwaiting~~~
HansolDiCaprio
#5
Chapter 4: Happy New Year peeps! <3 May the New Year bring you all happiness, love, and success! Enjoy & thank you for your support!