Covert Chapter 5

SoHyun’s POV

The door sounded when I entered the empty house. I went straight to the closet to start packing up my belongings into the boxes I brought with me. I cleared off my vanity and packed everything up and hauled it into the trunk of my SUV.

I still kept my old apartment just in case something like this would happen. I couldn’t act rashly without a backup plan. I piled the boxes against a wall in a rush, for I had to check my safe. I logged in the password and the safe opened to reveal a large manila envelope and a rose gold engagement ring. I tucked the envelope away into my bag and then flushed the ring down the toilet. I should have parted with it years ago. 

The next following days, I took home belongings from my office bit by bit each night so my colleagues wouldn’t catch onto the fact that I was emptying out my office. Taking on the assignment contradicted my intentions, which would surely confound them. I knew for a fact that Hyun Woo would especially be perplexed by my decision at first, but he would understand. I sat in my office thinking over my course of action when someone came in and closed the door. However, his actions were quiet and deliberate to reduce any amount of noise.
 

“What are you doing here? You can't be here.” I immediately stood from my desk and demanded that SungHoon leave. He shouldn’t be here and he himself knew that very well.

“What are you planning to do? Why did you send me that package?” Ignoring his question, my eyes darted toward the clear walls, which revealed the entire floor of the BAU. I moved from my desk to close the blinds and lock the door.  

“It’s what I’ve been working on for the past four years. Show that to the Chief Advisor and reclaim your life. Think of it as my last gift to you.” I told him calmly with as he stared at me with disbelief until he pieced the meanings behind my words together. 

“No. Don't go," He pleaded, reaching to clutch my fingers and halting me in my steps. With the coax of his touch, I turned around to face him. "Do you want to put Sungjae through what you went through? Don’t do that to him. SoHyun, remember what it was like. It tore us apart! Nothing was the same after that!” His attempts to dissuade me were completely abortive, yet perfectly crafted. He knew how much I was affected by this in the past, forcing me to recall how I felt to convince me.

“How could I forget? Besides, it wasn’t my choice to make. You know exactly how procedures work around here. And Sungjae won’t care. He called off our engagement.”

“SoHyun... Didn’t you love him?” He questioned, trapping me against the desk so that I couldn't move. 

“Love? What I felt for Sungjae was only induced by dopamine and serotonin.” Every emotion we feel is in fact caused by neurotransmitters in the brain firing and causing us to feel a certain way. There was logic to everything. However my peers would react strangely whenever I applied such logic to mundane conversations. While he was the only one that fully understood my reasonings. 

“Then what caused those neurotransmitters to increase? Sungjae caught your attention that’s why.” He was skilled at countering me. His argument was valid and irrefutable. “There’s a flipside to everything and you know that not everything has a reason behind it. What causes intuition? Look through every major psychology journal published and none have an answer for that, because it’s innate. It is programmed into our genetic code.” I looked up toward the ceiling with my grip growing tighter on the edge of my d