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“Why’d you do that?! Why’d you let him go?”

Kris’ hands on his collar were so strong that Junmyeon think he could rip off his shirt in a blink of an eye. All he could distinguish in the latter’s eyes was hurt, betrayal and sadness. So much sadness that it broke Junmyeon’s heart. When he thought his decision would be the best for everyone, but turned out there’s one person who is affected the most.

Despite the fury in Kris, Junmyeon brought his hand up and place it above Kris’. “He wasn’t mine to begin with. Even you know who his heart belongs to.” This had caused Kris to enrage even further and swat away Junmyeon’s hands. It was only the two of them in the room but the intense atmosphere was choking Junmyeon.

“But you said you loved him!” Kris shouted, and it’s a wonder if the maids in the house could hear it.

“I did! No, I do! But not the way you think we have. We’ve never always been romantically in love.” Junmyeon sighed. He thought it’s about time to stop hiding behind the bush. “It was never like that. We tried but not even I can stop love from happening. He has always love Jessica and you know it too.”

The grip on his collar was finally gone. Kris’ shoulder slouched as his eyes droop and he lets out a cackle. It sounded so pathetic that no one can imagine how Kris felt, not even Junmyeon. “How about me then?” Kris uttered.

“What?”

“How about me? I’ve always loved Jessica all this time. Even before both of you came. Even after she decided that she’s never going to give up on Taec. Even when I…..know that she’ll never love me back. At least not now.”

Junmyeon only stood still. What else can he offer to Kris except comfort? He can’t lie to Kris saying that Jessica will love him soon. He can’t sugar coat anything about Taecyeon and Jessica’s love. The man in front of him yelled before falling onto his knees.

Without Junmyeon knowing, a tear rolled down on his cheeks. The eye bags under Kris’ eyes proved that he hadn’t been sleeping and Junmyeon can’t let this man turn his life into a living hell. Thankfully, he complied when Junmyeon strode near him and pulled the taller up. Kris only gave him a glance before he was on his feet.

“When was the last time you slept?” Junmyeon asked while his hand wandered to Kris’ face, caressing the skin under Kris’ eyes. The taller seems to welcome his comfort as he leaned into the touch and Junmyeon smiled at that.

“You’d think I’ll lose sleep for a girl?” Kris scoffed and Junmyeon wondered how he can still make a joke out of a situation like this. But Junmyeon’s glare was enough for words to stick up in Kris’ throat. Kris heaved out a sigh. “I can’t remember, okay?”

That was enough for Junmyeon to pull Kris by the hand and head towards the bed. “You need sleep. Even if you can’t, you need to.” Junmyeon sternly stated but his eyes showed a lot of compassion. Kris didn’t argue as both of them lie next to each other on the soft bed.

The taller didn’t cry, Junmyeon had never seen him cry. Not even when he injured his leg. Maybe he had already bawled his eyes out for the past few days but Junmyeon thought he couldn’t handle seeing Kris cry.

Gosh what is this feeling?

They were facing each other. Junmyeon had his eyes planted on Kris’ face while Kris only stared at his hands between them. I guess Kris do have trouble sleeping. Usually, if he can’t sleep, Taecyeon will snuggle with him. Maybe this method will help Kris too.

“Come closer.” Junmyeon whispered softly. Kris eyes immediately met his and the taller’s face turned into a puzzled expression. “Come closer, so I can snuggle you. You need it.” Even though Junmyeon was embarrassed when he suggested, but Kris tired face really screamed that he needed sleep.

“Jun, I don’t think we’re that close—”

“Please, trust me. It helps, you know.” Junmyeon sighed.

Kris didn’t question any further as he moved closer. Hesitantly, Junmyeon pulled both of Kris’ hands to circle his waist. One of his hands was wrapped around Kris’ shoulders while the other was on the blond male’s head. He can feel the quick intake of breath of the male in front him as he brings Kris face to his chest. At first, the man in his arms was stiff but soon he began to relax as Junmyeon massaged his scalp. “Feeling better?”

Junmyeon got a nose snuggled into his chest as Kris murmured a soft ‘Yes’. His stomach was making a cartwheel at the close proximity and dear God he can feel Kris lips moving against his chest when the latter speaks. If Kris can hear his heart beating so fast, he sure was not pointing that out.

They lie in that position for a few minutes. Eventually, they moved slightly to be more comfortable (somehow they ended up closer than before). Junmyeon’s hand never stops playing with Kris’ blond hair. It felt so soft against Junmyeon’s fingertips and he sure finds the smell of shampoo endearing. To tell the truth, he was doing all his will power to not plant a kiss on the taller’s head.

Just when Junmyyeon thought Kris had fell asleep, he felt Kris hugging him tighter. “Hmmm tell me how you met Taecyeon.”

Junmyeon smiled. He can recall how he first met his best friend when he first moved in with his mother. It was actually after his parents had divorced. Junmyeon was only nine at that time and he was actually an introvert, contrast to Taecyeon who would always chatter non-stop.

“I moved into his neighbourhood after my parents divorced and I was only nine. I hated the fact that he was taller and he talked too much while I was still drowning in self pity. But just like any other day, I was playing alone outside and he was riding his bicycle. He stopped in front of my house gate and we started talking. From then on, he kept coming by and I would go to his house too. Damn, how I miss those times so much.”

The memories come flooding in Junmyeon’s brain. How he wish he could turn back time where it was just the both of them. But then again, he wouldn’t have met Kris and Jessica. Both are equally important to him as well. “8 years of friendship is pretty long. Must be a strong one too.” Kris amused.

“Yeah. Which was why he would date me to get rid of my insecurities of being alone. He knew he loved Sica then but I guess he cared too much about me. Now you understand why I let go of him. I can’t do that to him anymore.” Junmyeon voiced out softly.

Whether it is now or then, Kris still need to accept that Taecyeon and Jessica were meant for each other. Junmyeon believed that both of them will last long and honestly, Junmyeon was happy for his friends. But it was a different story with Kris.

“What do you want me to do, Jun? You want me to give up? To move on?”

“I’m just saying that no matter what your choice will be, if you love her, you will want her to be happy, right? There are things in this world that we should sacrifice to make our loved ones happy. Even if it meant them being happy without us.”

Junmyeon didn’t know what Kris was thinking in his head. Sometimes, he wished he could have the power of a mind reader. Kris didn’t say anything for a while and Junmyeon begin to wonder whether the taller already fell asleep.

Once again, he was wrong.

“I met Jessica a year before you came.” Kris said out of the blue. “I was a new student and my Korean was really rusty so I don’t feel like talking all the time. But one day, she heard me speaking in English with a teacher and she suddenly interjects between us. It was funny really, she was so excited about having another person in this school who can speak English fluently. She was the one who suggested me to play basketball.” he continued, shaking his head as he tells the story.

So Jessica and Kris ended up seen together always from having lunch together to going back from school and even on the weekends together. It was a marvel how Jessica didn’t fall for Kris. This guy has the looks, the height, and also the caring type. Honestly, even Junmyeon can’t stop himself from wondering what it feels like have the latter as—No! What was he thinking?

No, no, no.  Jumyeon shouldn’t do this. He can’t fall for Kris.

But… What’s so wrong with falling in love with Kris?

The next day Kris decided to stop being a and to be present at school. It looked like he made amends with Taecyeon and Jessica judging how they were freely talking to each other. It was nice to have his circle of friends behaving the way they used to.

The only difference was now their sitting positions. The three of them were wide eyed when Junmyeon chose to sit beside Kris instead of his usual seat beside Taecyeon. It wasn’t his intention to make Kris’ face darkens but he can identify that Jessica hands were itching to hold Taecyeon’s. So maybe they could have a chance in doing so if they sat next to each other.

Like he mentioned before, Kris’ face darkens but Junmyeon tried his best to make Kris laugh and he succeeded to his glee. It’ll get better, I promise.

Few months pass by and things were finally looking up for Junmyeon. His relationship with his family seems to be going well. Victoria had been nothing but an amazing mother and Junmyeon was starting to feel accepted in his new family. His father stated that the offer to New Zealand was still open, but Junmyeon wanted more time.

More time with his friends. Especially Kris.

Kris and him were inseparable. It’s crazy how they were just an acquaintance months ago but now they’re practically glued together all the time. Occasionally, the four of them would go out after school but most of the time, it’s just the two of them.

He can tell that Kris was moving on and it made Junmyeon in high spirits. Taecyeon and Jessica's relationship remained unidentified for a while. They were still close as before, or maybe even closer. However, if they were really dating, they sure were planning to keep it as a secret. But it wasn’t for long as Junmyeon accidentally run into them locking lips in Taecyeon’s house.

Kris seemed okay with it. He was even at that point where he began teasing Jessica and Taecyeon for being too disgustingly sweet. It was finally going to where it should be and Junmyeon felt contended. There’s nothing that can ever make him leave.

Or so he thought.

“Sica, I don’t mean to be rude but I clearly remembered I said no.” Junmyeon exasperated, holding a disco ball in his hand. A good 30 minutes ago he was so excited about falling onto his bed and fly to dreamland until a hand dragged him to the mall.

“Oh come on! We are short of people for prom committee. Taec and Kris would never say yes to me.” Jessica pouted as she rummaged through her list of things she needed in her hands. Junmyeon dragged his hands down across his face. “And I don’t remember saying yes to you too!”

“But you have to help me!”

If Jessica Jung raises her voice, there is no way in this universe, or the next universe that you can win an argument with her. Accepting his fate, Junmyeon lets Jessica dragged his body to store by store. After half an hour, Junmyeon thought this isn’t so bad.

Jessica is a creative and a smart girl. She knows what she wants and how she’ll get it. No doubt that this prom will be one of the best proms in years. To this, Junmyeon felt excited for senior prom. But there’s a problem. Who should he go with?

His first consideration was Kris but…Kris wouldn’t, right? What if Kris wanted to go with a girl? A girl that is way prettier than Junmyeon. Psh what was he thinking? As if Kris would want  to go with him. It’s not like Kris like him or anything, right? But mere by that thought, Junmyeon felt himself sinking.

“You’re pouting. What are you thinking of?”

Junmyeon almost slipped the glue bottle from his hand and looked surprisingly at Jessica who was still choosing the glitters on the shelf. “I.. wasn’t thinking of anything.” His pout had now disappeared to a thin line.

“Yeah, sure you weren’t. It’s not like you were thinking about Kris, right?” she teased and Junmyeon felt his cheeks growing warm. Damn it, was it obvious? He was about to opened his mouth to deny but Jessica was faster.

“I know. Choosing all these stuffs makes you think of prom. You were thinking of bringing Kris, right?”

Oh great, Jessica is a mind reader. It’s so embarrassing to be a deer caught in the headlights. There’s no point of denying it. Taecyeon must have known about his crush too. If Taecyeon knew, does that mean Kris knew too?!

Nah it can’t be. Kris would be awkward with him if he does.

“Ugh you girls are pretty scary!” Junmyeon huffed and he received a chuckle from Jessica.

Junmyeon was about to abandon Jessica for making him embarrass but she caught his wrist faster. And stronger. For a cheerleader, she sure has a strong grip.

“Nu uh! We’re gonna talk about your crush, Junmyeon!”

Junmyeon lets out a whine, a childish one you might say that had Jessica giggled. It was no surprise that Jessica was persistent so they ended up sitting on the floor (people looked at them weirdly why yes) and Junmyeon begin telling her from A to Z.

Actually, having someone to let out these feelings was rather nice. Yes, he used to have Taecyeon but when Taecyeon started dating Sica, he felt this barrier between them. As if they’re not going to be how they used to be in the old days. Junmyeon can’t say he wasn’t disappointed, but he understands. At first it did