“How are they now? Is everyone fine?”

I directed my questions to Jin as he pace over slowly to my bed when my guards were back from the chaotic scene. “Are all of you fine?” I repeated.

“Everyone is fine.” Jin sat himself down by my bed and started taking out my medicines. “The Gotyps will be resting inside the garden since they can’t be seen in that condition. Hand please.” He says and I handed him my injured arm.

As Jin treats the cut on my arm, I gaze into the air and somehow I feel that I’m missing out something. Something that is very crucial and without it, I can no longer continue to expand the logic. “If the fifth prince is escorted back from Gotyp, why are there no news from him?” I murmured to myself, trying to solve this difficult one. I had heard the news of fifth brother from Jaebum – someone from Gotyp – but not from any of the royal advisors or anyone from the royal family.

Jin stops for exactly 2 seconds on what he’s doing and looked at me, there was an unreadable expression on his face when we exchange gazes. That brief moment was all I needed to know something was really amiss and that my guards knew about it. 

I took away the bandage roll from Jin’s hand because that is the only way to get his attention and have him look at me again. “What has happened?” I speak my words firmly, and as much as I hate to use it against my guards, I will have to use authority to get them to speak. This, I assume it as a deep and dark secret, can no longer go hidden because it involves my brother and I have every right to know it.

“Tell me.”

Jin stares at me with a look of empathy but doesn’t speak. I look around and see that everyone else has shun away from claiming the responsibility to bring to light whatever secret it is except for Rapmon. He stops his guarding position and seems to have accepted the reality that he will have to be the one speaking.

As if it takes a whole lot of courage for him to start talking, Rapmon took in a deep breath and hesitated, “The fifth prince passed on in Gotyp.”

Jin squeezes my hand and I could see that everyone is worrying about me. I try very, very hard to remember to breathe but there’s an invisible power that draws the air away. I shiver and hang my head down in silence. The only thing I hear is my unsteady breathing. I grit my teeth in order to stop it from quivering.

It can’t be… nobody told me a thing. Jaebum said that they guarded him back from Gotyp. It can’t be… The truth settles in and I accepted this news with much pain. I wept in agony made all the more bitter because I know that I have not done anything for my fifth brother nor have I got the chance to tell him how much I love him. I could only hope that his last moment was a peaceful and unpainful one.

“God…” I whimpered. “Help me…”

Jin stood up and Jungkook took his space. “Yoojin.” Jungkook calls for me but I don’t want to speak, I do not want to hear any other thing except bury myself in this sorrow and torture myself with this pain because this is the least I can do to pay for the guilt of not knowing the death of my fifth brother.

“I’m sorry.” I wept.

Jungkook shifts in closer and took me in his arms and the next thing I knew was that I loses consciousness crying in Jungkook’s embrace.

*”*

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