Baekhyun has never thought his life was hard, he never thought that he could have it better or worse - he never thought about it at all. He was satisfied living simply in the here and now and he was happy only because he was alive. It wasn't until he felt the warmth that he realized how cold and dull his everyday was. 

His childhood was empty. He didn't remember having parents or how he was raised, in fact he didn't remember much of his youth at all. Besides the small flashes that he couldn't piece together. His memory began when he was adopted into the Exordium Academy as an orphan. The so called 'academy' that he grew up in was built to train assassins like himself. Although sometimes he felt it more fit as a fancy military base than anything else. The main building was within the city along with multiple training buildings. 

His life at the academy started when he was around 10 years old and because of that he's seen many others come and go. He didn't make friends easy, Jongdae and Kyungsoo were the only ones he really got close to. 

Because of that he refused to have partners on the missions he was assigned. Not only did they hold him back but he was tired of watching them leave. Only because he was the best of the best such requests were granted to him.

However there was a time where he was expected to have a partner and his preference was harshly denied.

It was one late afternoon when he entered the main training room and instantly he noticed something was off. Maybe it was the way the other trainees glanced at him like they almost pitied him, or the way some of them looked off to the main office like they were expecting something to happen. It irked him and left him feeling angry, he didn't like being left out on the big secret. He hated drama but he also hated not knowing about it. 

He glared at all the other trainees like he was ready to kill and they backed off quickly, returning to whatever they were doing before he entered the room. He silently made his way to the metal staircase that led to the main office and entered with no hesitation. Completely ready for what they were going to throw at him. What he didn't expect was a slightly taller boy about his age to be standing there with his head down and a blush painting his cheeks.

"What -" He managed to spit out as the boy bowed deeply, never making eye contact with him. His eyes never once left the boy as they followed his form down and back up. "Is this." He finished. He glanced over to his trainer who raised his eyebrows, clearly unimpressed.

"This is Chanyeol. He will be training with you as of today." It was Baekhyun's turn to raise his eyebrows. He crossed his arms over his chest and purposely left the door wide open so he could walk out.

"I don't train with anybody." He glanced at Chanyeol with disgust written in his eyes and the boy lowered his head more in shame. His trainer sighed loudly before approaching him.

"You will -" He paused in what he was going to say, deciding it better to approach the topic in a different way - seeing the frustration in the younger boy's expression. "Listen, you're 15 years old now and soon you will be taking on official missions. All this time you have had to yourself, with no serious partner. But now it is time you start doing as you are ordered. Don't think in any way you are exempt from the rules." Baekhyun scowled but he already knew by the sternness in the older man's eyes that he wasn't getting out of this one.

He figured it wouldn't be long before the flustered boy in front of him would be complaining how he was impossible to get along with and how he wanted a new partner. That's how it was with all the rest, none of them dared to get close to him and they all refused to train with him. Out of fear or hatred, it didn't matter. His trainer walked up beside him and placed a hand on his shoulder tightly before he leaned down.

"Get along with him." He hissed in his ear quiet enough that Chanyeol couldn't hear. "Start by getting to know each other." He added in a louder voice after he straightened up. 

He walked out of the room closing the door loudly behind him and leaving the two boys in a silence that seemed never ending. Baekhyun took this time to observe the other boy. He was scrawny and a few inches taller, with black hair that fell well past his ears and almost to his shoulders. His clothing was casual with a zipped up sweater and baggy sweatpants. His hands fell folded in front of him and his fingers played together nervously, however Baekhyun noticed there was a pattern to it - like the boy was tapping along to something that couldn't be heard. There was obvious tension in the air as Chanyeol still refused to make eye contact.

"I'm Baekhyun." He said dumbly. Hoping for some sort of response so he could move on to training. Chanyeol looked up with wide eyes that oddly made him look like a startled puppy.

"I know." He mumbled shakily, finally making eye contact that caused his cheeks to flush even darker shades of red. A smirk played at the edge of the boy's lips and Baekhyun found it strangely endearing.

"Good." He replied curtly. "That makes this easy. Let's train now." He sharply turned and left the room with Chanyeol trailing after him at his heels. Baekhyun couldn't help yet again comparing him to a puppy - a lost one following him around the training room.

~'ㅅ'~

"Okay I'm going to be honest. When you said you were going to cook, I didn't believe you." Jongdae admitted while staring at the food before him in awe. Kyungsoo only rolled his eyes and scoffed. "Have some rice." The wide eyed boy mumbled placing a bowl in front of Jongdae whose gaze followed it the whole way.

"Marry me, Soo. So you can cook for me all the time." Jongdae finally tore his eyes away from the rice to look up at Kyungsoo with admiration. His cat smile curling on his lips.

"Idiot. I don't need to be married to you to cook for you. I'm only doing this because it's your birthday." Jongdae nodded distractedly as his attention went back to the food and he his lips. Baekhyun sat silently watching his friends with amusement.

"Right. But my birthday isn't for another week." Jongdae pointed out, placing a spoonful of rice in his mouth and closing his eyes with a hum of delight.

"It's just rice." Baekhyun mumbled distastefully, turning his attention to his own food. His comment was brutally ignored so the brunette chose to eat on in his solitude. Taking a spoonful of rice and dipping it into the doenjang stew. The flavours exploded in his mouth and he had to commend Kyungsoo for his persistence in cooking. 

"But in a week you'll be on a mission in China so we can't celebrate." Kyungsoo fired back before taking his own seat. They all continued to eat on in silence with the occasional pleased moan from Jongdae. Baekhyun somehow felt like he should leave the room with the way the other boy was enjoying his meal. None of them chose to address the mission the soon-to-be twenty year old was taking on in China. They had all come to the agreement that it was unnecessary to discuss work when it was just them. Instead they chose to enjoy the night that was given to them, holding onto each others presence like a warm blanket in the winter. 

Kyungsoo was the first to break the silence, pulling away from his dish.
"Do you remember that boy from five years ago? They used to say his aim could rival Baekhyun." He gazed across the table at the mentioned boy and didn't miss the way he tensed and his fingers twitched. Baekhyun winced at the sudden attention and offered a shrug.

"Oh yeah!" Jongdae exclaimed around a mouth full of food. "He wasn't around for long. I heard the other trainees talking about him, they said he was crazy, that he was the one who started the fire in the main training room." He paused before he perked up as he recalled something. "Didn't you train with him?" He turned to face Baekhyun who shrunk in his seat. Baekhyun knew exactly who they were talking about and it caused an uneasy feeling in his stomach. He nodded distantly but no one seemed to notice the change in his demeanour.

"I heard he was coming back." Kyungsoo added, going back to his food. Baekhyun on the other hand had lost his appetite, feeling like the walls were closing in on him to the point where he was struggling to breathe.

"Coming back? That'll be interesting." Jongdae grinned, buzzing with excitement. Jongdae was always the first to jump on the latest gossip, it was surprising he didn't already know of the departed boy's return. The conversation carried on but Baekhyun was to distracted to keep up with it, only picking at his now abandoned food.

~'ㅅ'~

Once they were all satisfied Kyungsoo rose from his seat to collect the dirty dishes, swiftly stacking them and carrying them off to the small kitchen. Baekhyun trailed after him, ready to offer his assistance but he was denied with a hard glare which didn't last long. Kyungsoo looked too tired to argue back. While they built up a system in the kitchen, Kyungsoo washing and Baekhyun drying, Jongdae stayed seated at the table with a hand resting over his belly. He made weird expressions, nose scrunching up as he rubbed his abdomen making him look like a new mother.

"I'm full." He announced to the kitchen. Kyungsoo frowned at him."That's why you're not eating anymore." Jongdae blinked at him before he started pouting, muttering to himself about how unfair the chef was. 

They hurriedly finished scrubbing the bowls while the birthday boy found his way to the cozy bed and collapsed on it with a grunt. Baekhyun took the time to wipe the table while everyone else settled down. He didn't want to leave Kyungsoo's dorm room a mess after he had offered it for the occasion. 

Just like every other dorm room there were four beds for it's occupants, all of which were out for the moment except for Kyungsoo. There was a considerably large bathroom off to the side and the room was painted in dull whites, blacks and greys. On one side of the room sat wide windows that took the place of the wall, lighting the room with the bright city lights. When he was done Baekhyun joined the other two huddled on Kyungsoo's bed, gazing out the window to the world on the other side.

"City that never sleeps." Jongdae mumbled with a yawn, curling up into Baekhyun's side. Part of him wanted to complain and push the boy away but instead his hand fell to the chocolate brown mess of hair. Indeed the city was wide awake as people continued on with their lives even in the night, wherever the lights took them. "Hey Kyungsoo. Soon you'll be the only one stuck at nineteen, how does that feel?" Jongdae tried to snicker at his own remark but it got caught as he dozed off.

"Like I'm surrounded by a bunch of children who will never mature." Kyungsoo retorted and Baekhyun was the only one conscious enough to chuckle.

"He's asleep." Baekhyun noted with an amused smirk, glancing from Jongdae to Kyungsoo who was still wide awake. "It would appear so." A comfortable silence fell on them as they continued to watch the life outside the window. 

Baekhyun let his thoughts wander, a luxury he didn't normally allow himself. He liked to keep things simple. He liked to be in the present. When he let himself wander he tended to get sentimental and emotional, which in his experience always came to kick him later. Life used to be easier, everything made sense and there was no questioning himself. He used to exist in a state of solitude, with brick walls built up around him like a fortress and he was content that way. He never stepped outside to explore that which was around him or experience the sky in it's ever changing mood. Until one day someone opened a lonely window to expose everything inside to the warmth of the sun. To show him what the stars looked like when the clouds cleared away and he allowed himself to appreciate the world for all the beauty it could hold. So instead of despising everything around him he came to admire it. Ever since then Baekhyun has been left wondering if he was truly content with the way he was, still too wary to open the doors to his fortress and step outside, keeping himself locked up. 

His eyes started to blur and he turned his attention to Kyungsoo. He couldn't recall why he ever allowed them into his life - his friends. But he still couldn't deny how grateful he felt for them being there, even if they were a pain in the . Kyungsoo seemed to notice the attention on him as he turned to meet Baekhyun's gaze.

"Stop looking at me like that. I'll start to think you actually like me." Kyungsoo raised his eyebrows and Baekhyun chuckled weakly. 

"I don't, in case you were wondering. I'm not very fond of people that bury me." Kyungsoo sighed loudly as he turned to face the city again.

"I didn't bury you, and either way you deserved it."

"Right." No words were spoken afterwards. Only the sounds of their steady breathing filled the spacious room as they drifted away for sleep to take it's hold. Baekhyun embraced the darkness, wrapping himself in it. The charm that hung around his neck felt heavier, searing into his skin and pulling him down where he didn't want to go.

~'ㅅ'~

Breathe in. Breathe out. Baekhyun continued to repeat the simple command in his head, telling himself over and over to focus. His fist collided with the punching bag hard and the thud echoed through the separate, closed off room. One breath, swing. The sound of a muffled sneeze behind him caught his attention and brought a scowl to his face. However he kept his focus and started swinging harder. He could feel beads of sweat falling from his forehead and gathering at the dip in his collarbone. His breath came out ragged and uneven and he knew he wasn't doing the steps right. He was exhausted and he could feel it in every muscle as they flexed to meet with his punches. Someone started to shuffle behind him and he turned his head, distracted by how annoyed he felt. The next time his fist collided with the bag his wrist twisted and he could feel a jolt of pain all the way up to his shoulder.

"!" He cursed, hands instantly reaching to rub away the ache. He turned to face the startled boy behind him.

"What happened?" Chanyeol asked nervously, noticing Baekhyun's angry expression and the way he massaged his wrist.

"Why aren't you training?" Baekhyun barked and the tall boy jumped, cowering like a puppy being scolded.

"I was told I'm too sick to train." Finally Baekhyun noticed the redness in his eyes and the way he leaned to the side like he was too exhausted to be standing.

"Then why aren't you resting?" He meant to be more aggressive but his voice came out sounding soft and concerned. Which he violently denied was true. He wasn't concerned about Park Chanyeol in any way.

"I didn't want to miss a training session and make you do it alone." This made Baekhyun scoff. "When are you going to understand I don't actually want you around? I want to be alone." Baekhyun glared at him and Chanyeol seemed to be unaffected, simply blinking away the harshness in the small boy's tone. For about a month they had been training partners now. Baekhyun really hadn't expected the other to stay for so long, but he proved himself to be very persistent, following Baekhyun around wherever he went, insisting on eating together and never missing a training session.

"Why would you want to be alone?" Chanyeol asked, his eyes wide and flooded with curiosity. Baekhyun rolled his eyes, neglecting to answer and instead walking over to the bench to grab his water bottle. Again the tall boy was unaffected, accepting that he wasn't going to get a reply and taking a seat on the bench. He tilted his head watching as Baekhyun downed the water before he couldn't help it anymore and sneezed into the collar of his sweatshirt, the inside of his nose burning. This seemed to catch Baekhyun's attention who swallowed a mouth full of water, relaxing as the coolness of it spread throughout his body.

"Go rest, Chanyeol." He hissed softly. "I don't need you here. Why are you even still here?" He questioned, sitting beside Chanyeol with genuine curiosity. He wasn't talking about the boy being present in the training room with his sickness, he was wondering why the boy was adamant on being his partner and Chanyeol seemed to understand.

"Why am I here?" Chanyeol repeated, his face twisted in confusion as he tried to breathe through his stuffed nose. "Why do you want me gone? I have no reason not to be here." Chanyeol turned and met Baekhyun's gaze for a moment. Holding his stare longer than he ever has in the time they've known each other. Baekhyun was thrown off, blinking as he observed the way the boy's eyes reflected the light, getting lost in the darkness of his irises. It was strange because Chanyeol wasn't bold with any contact and kept his head down. Maybe he was brash with his words, speaking whatever came to his mind and making endless bad jokes. He wasn't easy to put down and brushed off any insult Baekhyun threw at him. He was bold in his persistence but he hardly made eye contact and never touched anyone, even the accidental brush of skin against skin from standing too close. Chanyeol seemed to realize this as his eyes widened and he pulled away, bringing Baekhyun back to reality enough to make some sort of response.

"Nobody else wants to be my partner." Baekhyun admitted distantly, ignoring the way Chanyeol flushed bright red.

"Well if they don't want to, then I will." Chanyeol nodded his head with a pleased hum. Completely oblivious to the way he made Baekhyun's insides twist in a sickly way.

~'ㅅ'~

He woke in the morning to the strong smell of cooking food. Baekhyun followed his nose out of the pile of blankets that had buried him in the night to the light of the morning. Jongdae was the first to notice him sitting up in bed - with squinted eyes and disheveled bed hair. He could tell Jongdae was trying to hold back a snarky comment as the corners of his lips twitched and Baekhyun scowled. But Baekhyun doesn't get to mutter any insults before the boy is speaking.

"I convinced Kyungsoo to cook us breakfast." Jongdae glanced off to the kitchen like he was waiting for Kyungsoo to acknowledge him, but when he didn't he turned back to Baekhyun with a grin. "He's like our own personal chef." A laugh fell from his lips and Baekhyun had to bite his own to keep from smiling.

"Don't push your luck." Kyungsoo spoke up from the stove. Not even taking the time to turn his head. Jongdae flinched, lowering his head in shame and sinking in his seat at the counter.
Baekhyun managed to crawl his way out of bed and his bare feet were greeted by the plush carpet. He joined the chef at the stove and peaked over his shoulder as the finished Korean pancakes were slid onto an awaiting plate. Baekhyun his lips, his stomach finally joining him in the world of the conscious and protesting it's neglect. Perhaps he should have eaten more the night before.

"Sit." Kyungsoo demanded, noticing Baekhyun. The brunette does as he's told, joining Jongdae on one of the stools. Plates were placed out in front of them generously along with leftover stew before Kyungsoo joined, eating his own meal standing on the other side of the counter. Jongdae is quick to voice his contentment, humming around his chopsticks.

"I really do love you." He mumbled incoherently and Baekhyun couldn't figure out if he was talking to the food or the chef, but Kyungsoo gave no reaction.

Jongdae finished first, pushing his plate away with a sated sigh.
"I think I'm going to wash up, can I borrow your shower?" He looked to Kyungsoo for approval and got a brief nod in return.

"Just don't go breaking things. It's not only my bathroom." He gestured to the empty beds of his missing roommates to make his point. Jongdae grinned, running off to the bathroom with a teasing, "Thanks babe." Blowing a kiss at a scowling Kyungsoo.

Just like it always was when the two were left alone, silence greeted them. Baekhyun held no complaints, continuing on with his meal. But Kyungsoo seemed to think otherwise as his voice pierced through the air.

"It didn't seem like you slept well last night, you looked troubled. Is everything alright?" Baekhyun looked up and saw a flash of what appeared to be concern in Kyungsoo's eyes along with something else he couldn't decipher. But it was stealthily masked and he felt like he was missing something important.

"I've just had a lot on my mind. Why? Were you watching me sleep?" Baekhyun grinned mischievously as he snickered. He turned his focus more on his plate. Ripping apart his pancake to dip in the stew.

"No. It's hard not to notice when you're tossing around and whimpering more than you usually do." Baekhyun's expression twisted and he stuffed his chopsticks in his mouth, puffing out his cheeks. The tone that Kyungsoo used made it sound like he was scolding the brunette for disturbing the night and Baekhyun didn't take kindly to the insult. 

Something crashed to the floor in the bathroom followed by a muffled "wasn't me!" from Jongdae. Kyungsoo scoffed. "Idiot." Baekhyun hummed in agreement.

The moment was broken after the interruption but Kyungsoo easily moved on.
"Suho said he wanted to see you, that it was important." He glanced up to see if he had Baekhyun's attention and he did. "Are you going to go?"

"Yeah, I'll stop by his office or something. I'd rather not go on another one of his bonding coffee dates so I'll surprise him." Baekhyun shrugged finishing off the last of his pancake. Kyungsoo couldn't agree with his ideals as he was one of the very few that enjoyed coffee with the older leader.