The filming for the broadcast that day was going smoothly as expected. Laughs, jokes, smiles and happiness filled the ambient in the 3^rd floor of the basement of Weekly Idol. I certainly was having a good time until that moment.

“I think” Hani began to say “that Sinb is not close with Dahyun and Jooheon”

When I heard that, I just could put a neutral expression in my features, not knowing what to do or answer.

“Oh, I think so too” said Defconn in pure curiosity “Jooheon, who are you not close with?”

Everyone in the set went silence at the question, wondering what would be the answer of Jooheon. I chewed on my bottom lip, somehow nervous, expecting that the answer wouldn’t be…

“To be honest…” Jooheon started to say hesitating a bit “with Sinb-ssi…”

Me.

And as soon as he said it, Defconn took him by one of his arms to put him up and drag him near me. I could only laugh a bit at seeing the struggle and embarrassment in Jooheon’s face while he tried to resist, until I heard Jackson shout something that caught me off of guard.

“I’m not close with Sinb!” Jackson exclaimed matter of factly “Me and Sinb aren’t close too!” his expression was pure indignation and he looked somehow annoyed.

I would be lying if I said that his statement didn’t surprise me and made me flustered, and for some reason it made me feel something weird creeping slowly in my chest.

“You’re close with her!” exclaimed Defconn, still trying to get up Jooheon off of his seat “You two are like best friends”

“We’re not close!” insisted stubbornly Jackson, surprising me even more.

I really didn’t know how to react to all of what was happening at the moment, and could only put a calm expression in my face, for the sake of the program and maybe my emotions that were like a turmoil at the moment.

“C’mon, Sinb-ssi” Defconn looked at me and indicated me to get up of my seat “I really didn’t know about this, I just heard from Hani” Hani nodded in agreement.  

I got up awkwardly and my eyes bumped to other pair of eyes in front of me. Jooheon was standing in front of me, awkward smile; eyes nearly closed forming cute crescents and puffy cheeks. Just one word pop in my mind at the view: cute.

I smiled at him trying to make him feel less nervous and embarrassed, he replied to my action with another sweet smile. And while all this was happening, I couldn’t stop feeling a longing stare fixed in my every move, the one stare that has been in me since the program started, and it made me feel more nervous if that was possible. And I was very sure that it wasn’t from the staff, the MCs or Jooheon… But the one that has made my feelings and emotions somewhat uncertain: Jackson Wang.