Changkyun really was heartbroken by the time he joined No Mercy. The bullying from the other trainees did not help the situation.

They failed to realize that he had been through his fair share of hardships, too. They could only focus on the fact that Changkyun had entered Starship Entertainment, joined their brutal survival show, and stolen the place of Gunhee and Seokwon. Changkyun knew they had the right to be mad, but he just wished that they could learn to accept him, or at least not torment him while in the dorm.

"Hey, Changkyun! Would you stop rapping? You sound like ." Even through the closed door, Changkyun could still hear the low voice say, "Gunhee so would have been better."

Comments like that made Changkyun feel guilty. He wished that he had never joined Starship Entertainment. He wished that Nu'bility had just debuted and that he didn't have to know these boys. He wished that he had never followed his dreams, or destroyed another's dreams in the pursuit of his own. 

He wished that he had never been born on some days.

"I'm sorry," he called out, turning off his phone. Immediately after, the screen lit up with a message. His mother. Changkyunnie, you haven't called us all month. Congrats on winning No Mercy! Maybe you could call us.

He answered quickly that they were busy, and that he would call when they weren't so preoccupied. It was a lie, in some ways. They were busy, true, but the work would only get harder as the time went on.

Changkyun was startled when the door opened abruptly, and he sat up so as to not seem rude.

"Kid, get out. I want to change," scowled Minhyuk.

"Yes," he answered meekly before leaving the room. The sound of his socks on the hardwood flood was enough to make the boys turn away from the TV and towards the intruder.

"Really, Changkyun," Wonho scolded, "you should be quieter when practicing. Or were you trying to make it sound worse?"

The youngest lowered his head in apology.

However, Wonho was very keen on making Changkyun feel embarrassed. "Answer me."

"I-I don't know what you mean. I was practicing my rap."

"Jeez, this kid's deaf as hell." The others chuckled at Wonho's words. "Whatever. I won't ask again. Just remember that you're on my bad side next time you try to sass me."

Changkyun nodded, although his insides were fuming. He was sure his face was red, since Hyungwon said, "He looks like he learned a lesson," as he was leaving to sit in the kitchen.

Yeah, that you guys are a bunch of dimwits.

He wanted to leave. He wanted to terminate the contract with Starship and just go back home. Go to college. Work in a sweatshop. Anything seemed better than what he was going through with the trainees.

After a few minutes of peering through the corner of his eyes, he saw Minhyuk leave the bedroom; he quietly made a run for it. To his relief, no one stopped him on the way there.

Hours passed. He was all alone while everyone else sat in the living room, laughing and watching TV. Truly, he didn't mind being alone, considering the people he had to be around.

The sound of the door could be heard, and a chorus of, "Thank you, manager!" Changkyun cautiously stepped into the hallway to see what had caused the commotion. Takeout. Lots of it. Noodles and chicken and pizza.

"The kid may be deaf, but he's sure got a sense of smell," Wonho scoffed.

"Yeah. He always seems to want something."

Changkyun was about to retreat into his room when Kihyun spoke up.

"Come and get a piece of pizza, then leave. You can't eat more because your acne is starting to flare up. I think it's all those snacks you're having."

"I'm sorry," he mumbled. "Thank you, though." He shuffled over to get a slice of pizza.

Once again, he was alone.

The loneliness only lasted so long, though, as night came and the boys started going to bed. He lay as still as he could when Minhyuk and Jooheon stumbled in. The bunk under him shakes as his oldest roommate throws himself onto it. After that, there is silence once again. 
 

The next morning, Changkyun wakes up to find the room empty. Kihyun must have come through already, he thought. He was about to climb down from his bunk when the faithful alarm clock came in. "I'm guessing you're going to get dressed?"

He nodded.

"Good. We need to leave in ten minutes flat, so be quick about it." The older boy left the room after giving his orders.

There was no time for breakfast, as usual. For Changkyun, at least. The others had already enjoyed their meal, since Kihyun had told them to wake up. No one told Changkyun.

In the van, he squeezed himself as close to the window as he could. Hyungwon, who was sitting near him, squinted at his face.

", Kihyun is right. Your acne is getting disgusting. Don't you wash your face?"

"Yes. I'm trying make it go away."

"Try harder. You already—how do I put this—lack visuals. The zits are making your face even more repulsive." The model boy turned the other way.

"Hyungwon, you couldn't have said that a bit nicer?" Jooheon called from the passenger seat.

"Not really. It's the truth."

"Yes, but some things shouldn't be said, even if they're true."

The two bickered back and forth as if Changkyun was not there. The youngest hid his cheek with his shoulder and pushed his bangs down. They didn't realize that he was uncomfortable. They didn't realize that things bothered him, too. 
 

Practice went as usual. They danced for hours. Changkyun was specifically called out when he missed a move or was a second behind the group. He apologized, of course, even though Kihyun and Minhyuk were messing up more than he. Lunch came, and he was only allowed to have a little bit of the greasy food, because of his acne. Manager never brought healthy foods, so Changkyun was running on a slice of pizza from the night before, plus two chicken wings. It was not a surprise when he fell to his knees during their nth rehearsal of their debut song.

"Get up!" shouted Wonho, still dancing.

His legs shook. Instead of letting him stand, his knees gave out and he fell on his backside. Embarrassing.

"What are you doing?" grumbled Shownu. Slowly, everyone stopped dancing, but not because they were concerned.

The look on their face was annoyance.

"I–I'm sorry," Changkyun stuttered. He brought a hand to his pounding head and attempted to stand again.

Jooheon walked towards the boy on the floor. "Uh, guys, I think he's done for today. Like, seriously."

Wonho turned off the music angrily. "What do you mean, he's done for today? It's only 1 in the afternoon, for God's sake!"

"Yeah. He should get up! We always get up when we're tired; he can, too."

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