Chapter 36: Pleading & Saving

He knocked on her door firmly, standing outside her porch under the moonlight. He almost wanted to turn back, thinking she may be asleep by now. Who was he kidding to sneak out of the Flower Palace to come see her? But just as he turned his heels to leave, his ears picked up the sound of the door opening.

“Dongil?”

Jungseol was confused as to why the certain palace guard was here outside her porch. It was late indeed, but she was not asleep just yet. She was busy finishing up her parents’ chores, so they could rest. It’d been a couple days since she returned, and she was blissfully thankful that her parents gave their welcoming arms for her to return back home. And now that she returned, she could help them with their duties around the house.

“What are you doing here?” she asked, stepping out and shutting the door slightly. “It’s late. Shouldn’t you be-”

“I’m sorry…” Dongil softly whispered, his back still facing her, tightening his clutch on his sword in his hand.

Jungseol blinked and looked up at him in confusion.

The young guard took a deep breath, his shoulders heaving up and down for a second. “I don’t know why I keep saying I’m sorry, but I feel like they are the only words I can muster up now. Like there’s nothing else for me to say…” 

Jungseol understood the meaning of his apologies, considering what he did for his past mistakes. Even though it pained her that her heart still yearned for him like many times, she understood the confusion and pain he must be feeling for what he did to the Royal Princess. 

“What are you doing here?” she asked him again, crossing her arms upon her chest and inhaling a quick sharp breath due to the night cold.

Dongil finally turned to face her. The sight of his friend in common clothes made him realize that before she was a palace maid, she was just a normal girl. She had a life before any of this situation. “There still hasn’t been a word about the Princess,” he said softly.

Jungseol blinked at him, but kept her facade up. 

“The Queen has made it clear to everyone at the palace that she isn’t feeling well and no one was to see her,” he explained. “I mean, I thought she was supposed to get married? What happened?” He asked aloud to no one. “Did something happen? Did the Queen change her mind?”

The young maid could not answer his curious questions. Besides the Queen and her own maidens, Jungseol was the only one who knew of the princess’ whereabouts. As far as everyone else knew, the wedding got postponed due to Yeonhwa not feeling well lately. Words flew in the palace that she had an illness.

“I don’t know,” Jungseol lowered her head, gazing at her shoes that suddenly looked the most interesting to her now. “Perhaps, the Prince changed his mind. Maybe he doesn’t want to marry Her Majesty anymore.”

“But it doesn’t make sense,” Dongil still tried to reason, shaking his head. “He’s still sending gifts to her nowadays, so it is clear he still has intentions on making her his Queen. And the Princess, if she really is sick, then how come no one is tending to her? No one has ever gone to her quarters, you know that? Not to give her meals, medicine, nothing.” He turned his back to her again and faced the outside view. “And the Queen herself,” he sighed, “she’s been acting strange lately.”

Jungseol peeked up at him with a gulp.

“She’s been going out lately, but that’s not the weird part.” He turned back to her, and he could have sworn he saw her flinched from surprise. “She’s been leaving the palace through the back entrance. Tell me that doesn’t sound strange.”

The former maid took in a small breath and shook her head. “I-I don’t know, Dongil-ssi,” she stammered nervously, biting her lips. “I’m no longer a maid at the palace. I wouldn’t have a clue.”

Dongil narrowed his eyes at her, somehow intrigued at the view of her anxiousness. Knowing her for years now, he could always tell whenever she was telling a lie. And this time was one of those times. “What do you know?”

Jungseol suddenly perked her head up at him. “Huh?”

“You just lied to me, Jungseol. Why?” He eyed her suspiciously. 

“What are you talking about? All I did was-”

“Don’t do that again,” the bodyguard shook his head in disbelief at her. “You know something, don’t you?”

Jungseol cleared awkwardly and shook her head once more. “You should go back, Dongil. It’s late,” she said, about to turn back to go inside her house. 

But Dongil wasn’t going to let this go. Grabbing her arm, he pulled her back to face him. “Something happened,” he stated. “I know something happened, so don’t leave me in the dark like this.” He looked into her eyes, trying to find some hope in her. “Please… I’ve already lost Yeonhwa, and now that I’ve lost you too…” He kept his hold on her arm as his gaze remained on her, their bodies just a few inches apart. So close, yet so far. 

Jungseol looked up at him, her heart skipping a beat at his last words. Perhaps, her prayers were finally being answered upon her feelings for him. But no - she didn’t want to think about that right now. She couldn’t.

“Goodnight, Dongil…” she softly whispered to him before pulling her arm away from him and finally entering her home. Locking the door, she noticed one thing - he never asked about her.

Counting the days she’d been locked up didn’t matter anymore after realizing that she would always be in the darkness. The only time she would catch a glimpse of light was when the maids of her mother would come to serve her meals. But now, she couldn’t care less. It wasn’t going to make any difference.

The sound of the cellar doors opened, revealing the Queen herself. Descending down the stairs, she was accompanied by her maids, one holding a torch of fire to brighten up the path. Once they got to ground level, they approached the princess who was sitting down and leaning against the wall tiredly. The Queen, with her hands folded properly in front of her, turned to look at the untouched tray of food and sighed dramatically in dissatisfaction.

“You really believe this is going to do anything?” she asked her daughter.

Yeonhwa opened her tired eyes and turned to look up at her mother. She had to close her lids again to adjust her blurry view. Going on a hunger strike was really wrecking her health, but she didn’t really care anymore. Gulping down a tinge of saliva down her dry throat, she leaned away from the wall and placed her hands on the ground to steady herself. “Greetings.... M-Mother…” she said, her voice much more quiet than usual.

Queen Shim sighed deeply as she looked down at her daughter, the once beautiful Flower Princess who was now disheveled and weak in filth from head to toe - like dirt. “Another day that you’ve skipped your meals,” she said, taking small paces in the room. “If you really wanted to die, I could have ordered the cook to do something about it.”

Yeonhwa blinked at her mother’s hurtful words, her broken heart tickling in pain. But she has gotten used to it by this point. “Mother, y-you don’t… mean that…” she breathed out weakly. “I am y-your daughter… You would never… do something like that… to h-hurt me…”

Queen Shim turned back to look at her daughter, seeing the fatigue written all over her pale face. 

“Not i-intentionally at least,” Yeonhwa managed to speak the last of her words with a dry laugh, leaning back against the wall.

The Queen shook her head, disapproving of her child’s attitude. “Your father has been sending letters,” she stated.

Suddenly, Yeonhwa blinked her eyes a bit wider than before, raising her head up to look at her mother. 

Now, the Queen got her attention. “Of course, he does not have plans to return to home just yet,” she said going back to her pacing. “He’s busy as always. Missing out on a lot of stuff going around here.”

A lump crawled in Yeonhwa’s throat, but she refused to throw up a cry. “Did he… write to me?” she asked. Whenever her father was away, he would write to her and send gifts to uplift her days. Realization dawned upon her that she hadn’t been responding to his letters from before. A horrible daughter she must’ve been, neglecting her father’s letters.

“If you’re wondering whether you can write to him or not,” Queen Shim said, turning her focus back to her daughter, “do not freight. I have taken care of them these past days.”

Yeonhwa bit her trembling lips and lowered her head, her messy strands of hair falling over the side of her face. It was nothing new that her mother had taken control over her life for the past days. Sometimes, she would wonder what the people in the palace were thinking - if they were curious of her whereabouts. Probably not.

The Queen sighed deeply and walked closer to her daughter, crouching down to face her directly. “You’ve grown weak, my child.” She tilted her head at her daughter, observing her weak and frail figure. “Certainly, you do not wish to continue this tactic of yours forever.”

The Princess lifted her head to look at her mother. “Do you even trust me?” she whispered tiredly, her voice dry and rough. “I’ve been here… for days l-locked up… The Crowned Princess of the… Flower Palace…” She coughed a bit, leaning her head back on the wall. “If words get out that I am locked up… down here…” she breathed heavily with a sigh, “would you even trust… what I would do?”

She saw a cunning smile on her mother’s face before feeling the touch of her hand cupping her cheek. “You are my child,  Yeonhwa,” Queen Shim said. “I trust that you would do whatever it takes to make sure the royal name of the Han family does not fall into disgrace. Even if it means suffering just a little…”

A small laugh escaped the tired princess again, closing her eyes as if preparing herself to fall asleep. “Then, you tell Father…” she whispered with all her last strength for the moment. “I want a cherry blossom tree…”

Hwayang released a deep sigh as he finished adding another wooden log to the sheep fence. Wiping the sweat away from his forehead with his arm, he raised his head to glance up at the bright sun surrounded by clouds in the sky. Afternoons were getting really hard these days, considering he was always out in the farm fields. At times, he would either be taking care of the animals, handling the haystacks, or fixing storage houses and fences. It wasn’t like he had anything else to do anyways.

Heaving another breath, he snapped out of his tired thoughts and picked up the long lightweight log to finish making the fence gate.

“Need help?”

The farmboy turned to see a familiar face and blinked. “Eunpil,” he said.

The huntress smiled warmly at him as she walked to his side to pick up the log he was just working on. “Jooyang really needs to grow up and help you around here,” she joked with a laugh. “Who else is going to make sure you don’t hurt yourself, hm?”

Hwayang could only keep his eyes on her in sorrow quietly. These days, he still finds it hard to face her after knowing what she truly feels for him. He couldn’t bring himself to tell her that he doesn’t harbour the same feelings, but he also couldn’t stand lying to her and making it seem as though he was giving her a chance. He was stuck between hurting a friend and doing what’s good for both of them.

“Where is Myungseok these days anyway?” Eunpil asked, grabbing the rope to tie the log on the fence. “He isn’t out here as often as he used to be.”

Hwayang cleared his throat and helped tying the other end of the log. “You forget that his family owns an eatery,” he commented with a light smile. “Of course, he’s more of a server than a farmer.”

Eunpil scoffed with a grin. “If he’s successful, then he’d be rich in the end. That would leave us all alone.” She finished tying the knot on the log and turned to face the farmboy with a sigh. “My father and I went hunting again this morning. We managed to catch some wild turkeys and even extract some bee honey, too. If you want, I can bring them over later. Your family probably hasn’t restocked on meal preparations.”

Finishing another knot at the end of the log, Hwayang turned back to his friend with a tired sigh, but smiled. “That’d be great actually,” he said, picking up the tools to clean up. “Mom has been busy at the embroidery shop, and Dad’s been fixing our storage house nonstop. Thanks, Eunpil.”

The young huntress smiled happily at his remark and bit her lips with a nod, helping him clean up the last few of the tools. For a while now, she had been trying to get closer to him. Whether it be by being a friend or something more, she was just happy that he did not push her away this time. It was hard to make conversation at first considering their disagreements before, but now it was as if it never happened. She was starting to see that he was returning back to his old self, but nowadays becoming more quiet than usual, too. At least to others, he was quiet. To her, he would still try to talk the same amount of length and and even ask her how her day had gone. 

Maybe the farmboy was slowly opening up to her like she desired. Perhaps, there was a chance.

Once they cleaned up, they walked through the field to get back to the farmhouse. 

“The season is starting to change quickly nowadays,” Eunpil commented, gazing up at the once sunny sky that was now gloomy. “You think spring is coming earlier this year?”

Following her attention, Hwayang also glanced up at the clouds, but shrugged. “I don’t know,” he said. “The good thing is our farm will get the water they need from the rain.”

Eunpil turned back to him, a smile on her face as she chuckled wholeheartedly. 

“What?” The farmboy furrowed his brows, confused at her sudden response of a laugh.

“Nothing.” She shook her head and cleared awkwardly, swallowing the giggles. A heavy sigh escaped her as she glanced back at him. “You just… I realize now that you haven’t changed…”

Hwayang tilted his head at her, still confused as ever. “Why would I have changed?” He adjusted the excess of rope wrapped around his shoulder. 

Eunpil lowered her head, eyeing the path in front of them. “Well, you did change after uh-” She stopped herself, realizing she was making the conversation rough now. Even Hwayang’s eyes faltered at her response and gulped, a lump of sorrow building in his throat. “I-I’m sorry,” she quickly apologized. “You know I don’t mean-”

“It’s fine,” he said, putting a smile on his face stiffly. “You don’t mean it, I know. It’s alright, really.”

Eunpil’s expression fell sadly, hating herself for tuning the conversation into a different road. She didn’t mean for what she said to slip out all of a sudden. She just couldn’t help it. Hwayang hasn’t spoken of what happened after he returned home that day, beaten and hurt from the Flower Palace. His family already gave him a hard enough time, and she didn’t want to add more by prying him to tell her what occurred. But at the same time, she wanted him to share it with her when he was ready. She just wished he would stop holding it all in.

“Hwayang! Hyung!” 

Both of them turned their heads to see the younger Yoon sibling running to them with an excited smile on his face. While rushing with anxiousness, he carried a familiar object in his arms.

“Are you done fixing the fence? Are you free?” Jooyang asked his older brother eagerly once he got in front of them. “You promised you would help me fix the kite and fly it with me.”

Upon a certain word, Eunpil blinked and looked down at the item in Jooyang’s arms - his kite. Specifically, the kite. Seeing it brought up a confused expression on her face as she gazed back aside at Hwayang, but his focus too remained on the colorful flying toy. She could have sworn she caught a glimpse of sadness washing over him.

“Yeah,” Hwayang replied to the young boy, a forced smile making its way on his face again. He brought a hand up ruffle his little brother’s hair. “Come on, I just have to put these stuff awa