Chapter 8
Missing and Misplacement“Hyung!” Sunggyu stopped on his trek and turned around to see a worried dino running up to him.
“Hey.” He answered briefly with a slight wave of his hand.
“Hyung, are you alright? I mean today…” Dongwoo just slightly mentioned since he was worried for his friend, but he didn’t want to fully bring the subject either. Today marks the 3rd after all.
“Yeah. Dongwoo, don’t you think it’s funny?” Dongwoo looks at Sunggyu concerned. “Today is the 3rd year but today I had a dream of Myungsoo. He told me to be happy and good-bye.”
“Hyung…”
“You don’t need to worry. I’ve come to term with reality since the dream. You’re right. Myungsoo probably is gone and since he had told me to be happy, I think I need to live correctly now. I think, if he was here, he wouldn’t want to see this me.” Sunggyu said with a smile as he stared up at the sky, imagining Myungsoo looking at him and smiling at the content Sunggyu. Hearing this Dongwoo couldn’t help but hug the other tightly.
“I’m so proud of you hyung!” Sunggyu chuckled at the other’s childishness before pretending to be angry.
“Yah! Get your heavy off of me!” Dongwoo laughed real loud at that and released Sunggyu but not before smacking the other’s .
“Yah! JANG DONGWOO! You did not just do that!” Sunggyu shouted loudly as Dongwoo only gave him a cheeky smile and ran off. Being the lazy grandpa he was, Sunggyu didn’t bother chasing after Dongwoo so he only sighed.
“Sunggyu-ssi.” Sunggyu turned when he heard his name being called to come face-to-face with Hyunsoo.
“Oh, Hyunsoo.” Although Sunggyu has indeed come to term with the incident with Myungsoo, seeing Hyunsoo was still quite difficult for him. Hyunsoo reminded Sunggyu too much of Myungsoo and he can’t help but actually want the younger to be his Myungsoo; that would be too unfair to Hyunsoo and since Hyunsoo isn’t Myungsoo, this will hurt Myungsoo as well.
“Sunggyu-ssi, what are you doing here?” The younger asked as he looked around but staring back at Sunggyu. He has never seen Sunggyu around the Music building whenever he came around to look for Woohyun.
“I have classes here.” Sunggyu basically answered before noticing that the younger was alone. “Where’s Woohyun?” They were always together. Always. Except for maybe class.
“Oh. You’re in Music as well? Woohyun hyung is sick today so I thought I’ll drop by his lecture to pick up some notes.”
“Yeah, I’m in Music and really? I can help you get the notes since I have most of the same lectures as Woohyun. I’ll give them to you at lunch?”
“Really? Thank you very much then, Sunggyu-ssi.” The younger exclaimed happily as he gave a bright smile to Sunggyu in which he winces. It still hurts real bad to have Hyunsoo smiling at him like that because of how much Hyunsoo looked like Myungsoo. Even the smile was the same. It was then that he suddenly frowns again.
“You can drop the formality. Hyung is fine.”
“Oh. Thank you Sunggyu hyung.” Although Sunggyu had wanted to stop the curtesy, having being called ‘hyung’ just pains him more. Looking at Hyunsoo smiling and calling him ‘Sunggyu hyung’, Sunggyu help but want to hug the other, but he knows he can’t. Hyunsoo isn’t Myungsoo, and even if Sunggyu has come to accept that perhaps Myungsoo will never be back again, he can’t stop imagining Hyunsoo as Myungsoo.
“Sorry but… maybe I’m not ready for ‘hyung’ yet…” Sunggyu voiced out. He knows that this was really unfair to Hyunsoo but he can’t help it.
Hyunsoo becomes a bit sad at that but he knew it couldn’t he helped. He knows how Sunggyu was probably still thinking of Myungsoo. After all, Hyunsoo has been constantly reminded of how similar he was to Myungsoo by Dongwoo and the Lee brothers, although not intentionally, over the past few days. Hyunsoo couldn’t blame them.
“Oh… Sunbae then?” Sunggyu nodded at that.
“Well, Sunbae, I’ll see you at lunch then? I have a class to attend.” With that, Hyunsoo turned and made way to the Digital Arts building. Sunggyu watched as the younger leave. When the other has completely disappeared from his field of vision, he couldn’t help but sigh. He felt bad for treating the younger so awkwardly but the more he stays with Hyunsoo, the more he comes into contact with him, the more he is reminded of Myungsoo. But, maybe if he spends a bit more time with Hyunsoo and think of him as Kim Hyunsoo, a near complete stranger who only looks slightly familiar to Kim Myungsoo, he’ll learn to be okay with him. Maybe.
∞
Sunggyu flipped his phone out to see the time. It was almost lunch break with the group and Sunggyu couldn’t wait till lunch. He had about 3 lectures this morning and he was tired of being in class and taking extra notes for Woohyun. Although he himself doesn’t mind taking extra notes, his fingers were complaining. All in all, he didn’t want Hyunsoo to possibly miss his class as well. Sunggyu found himself wanting to treat the younger kindly, almost like how he treated Myungsoo, yet he kept reminding himself that he wasn’t allowed to. He was lost.
“That’s all for class, see you next lecture.” As soon as the professor ended his speech Sunggyu began packing his bags quickly by stuffing everything into it. With everything in, he briskly exited the classroom and made way toward the café. When he was within the dining halls, he found his same group of 6 who were sitting at their usual table waiting for Sunggyu; Woohyun included. Seeing Woohyun was making Sunggyu confused so the first thing he did when he reached the table was to ask,
“Woohyun, I thought you were sick?”
“Oh, yeah. I felt better so I thought I’ll join in for lunch and then attend my afternoon classes. I don’t want to miss too much.” Woohyun explained as he unconsciously but reflexively wrapped his arm around Hyunsoo’s waist, who was sitting beside him. Noticing his action, Hoya inwardly sighed at that while everyone else kind of ignored it. They realized how greasy and clingy Woohyun can be not to mention how possessive he was. Subconsciously they do understand why Woohyun was acting that particular way with Hyunsoo around Sunggyu yet they wished that he didn’t have to do that. As for Hyunsoo, he was oblivious to everything. Like always. It wasn’t the first time that Woohyun would randomly put his arms around him and Hyunsoo enjoyed skin ship, so it didn’t matter.
“I see.” Sunggyu simply nodded at that. “Here’s your notes for the first 3 classes.” Sunggyu tried to ignore how close Woohyun and Hyunsoo was as he handed some papers to Woohyun.
“Thank you Sunggyu hyung.” Woohyun thanked the other with a smile.
“No prob.”
Lunch as always end up being extremely loud. Sungyeol and Woohyun ended up arguing over stupid matters such as which drink was better, coke or Pepsi. Dongwoo with his loud contagious laughter and Sungjong whining and mumbling about how immature his Hyungs were. Hoya who was trying to stop the laughing Dongwoo who began choking on his water because he was laughing too much.
Sunggyu sighed as leaned back into his chair, watching his dongsaengs, too tired to nag them. At that moment he noticed how quiet Hyunsoo was as he just sat there and giggling softly at the commotion. Sunggyu was caught by the other’s sound as he laughed. It was soft and sweet and Sunggyu could only think about how melodious it was. But then Hyunsoo turned to look at him, catching him staring. Sunggyu let out an awkward cough as he turned back to overlooking the childishness. He felt his heart beating at an irregular speed and he frowned. The way his heart was moving was the same as when he saw Myungsoo at first years ago. No… He’s not Myungsoo. Get a hang of yourself, Kim Sunggyu.
∞
“Sunggyu hyung, thanks for the notes earlier.” Woohyun said as soon as he sat down next to Sunggyu in their lecture.
“Don’t worry about it. I didn’t want you to miss out since the last lecture was kind of important.” Sunggyu paused, “plus Hyunsoo had wanted to come take notes for you.”
“He did?” Woohyun asked with a brow raised.
“Yeah. He shouldn’t miss class when I was able to help.”
“Sunggyu hyung… I know this is probably really rude to ask you, but do you perhaps… to Hyunsoo…?” Hesitation was obvious in Woohyun’s tone but also determination.
“Woohyun… that myself am not sure. I know I shouldn’t be feeling anything towards him since he’s not Myungsoo but in a way, I can’t stop myself. You probably understand my feelings since I can see you really like Hyunsoo. I’m not asking you to understand or forgive me but imagine. Imagine if Hyunsoo was to disappear and you having still love him see someone who looks and even acts the exact same as him, would you easier think of him as another person? Although I do really wish to, Hyunsoo reminds me too much of Myungsoo and I can only want to treat him like him.” Sunggyu sighed as he leaned back into his chair.
“I know… I understand… but it doesn’t make it any easier for me. As cruel as I may sound but I can’t stand having to see you stare at Hyunsoo with suggestive eyes. There are days when I start to worry what if you ended up taking Hyunsoo away from me. I may sound extremely cheesy and possessive but I don’t like I can live without Hyunsoo.”
“I know of your worries. When I was back with Myungsoo, as you probably
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