To start off, a clarification about the ending of the last chapter. Hyoyeon wasn’t faking being drunk the entire time. The kiss just shocked her senses enough to make her sober and conscious. But she didn't want Hyukjae to know so she pretended to still be drunk right after.

And i'm really laughing right now at how ridiculously long this backstory is turning out to be. maybe you've even forgotten that it's all supposed to be a flashback ha ha but i cannot help what my mind wants to think and fingers want to type. so even though this story seems to hardly be moving forward, please be patient. more than anything, this chapter broke my writer's block. the twist occured to me recently so it may seem out of place. but i was struggling with a part of the future storyline and i think this chapter helps set the stage for it. OR you can blame Taylor Swift's song Safe and Sound. It put me in the mood to write something like this.

RATED M - for language. 

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The days were flying by in a blur of tulle, streamers and hairspray as Hyoyeon and her friends engrossed themselves in prom dress shopping, trying out different hair and make-up styles, and most importantly –organizing the event.

Tiffany, this year’s Prom Committee Chairperson, had set them to task with matching sparkly scented pink agendas that mapped out pretty much every second of their waking hours. Prom ticket layout designing, food tasting, fundraising bake-sales, DJ and band auditions, Location and décor shopping, calling photographers and videographers .. the duties were endless but the girls all co-operated with patient smiles knowing that it was Tiffany’s most cherished dream – to become a legend for organizing “the most fantabulous PROM ever!”

And thus, Hyoyeon hardly had a minute to breathe. This also meant she was seeing less of Hyukjae – who had been ordered to temporarily give up his ‘hanging out with Hyoyeon time’ by Jessica – and Hyoyeon actually had no problem with that. She was still feeling uneasy about rehashing that little secret from their past.

It was just one such hectic day when Hyoyeon found herself stepping foot into the girls’ washroom to try and wash off the product of a paint war initiated by Sooyoung. Tiffany had sent Sooyoung home as punishment for starting the childish fight – not that the taller girl protested because her hair was a goopy neon pink mess – and Hyoyeon had been ordered to clean herself and the ruined posterboards.

Just as she turned the corner to enter the actual sink area, her ears perked up at the sound of her name.

“Did Kim Hyoyeon save a country in her past life or something? Why is she the chosen one who gets to acquaint herself with Siwon Jr.?”

“I know! And that unnecessary grand proposal at the game! God I ‘effing hate those cheerleaders.”

Hyoyeon recognized the voices. They belonged to Shim NaYoon and Kwon Hyeri, also 12^th graders but from a different homeroom. Shim NaYoon used to be Jessica’s best friend having gone to the same Elite Elementary School and both coming from Seoul’s richest families. However, once they got to Middle School, Jessica quickly got closer to Hyoyeon and her friends and NaYoon considered it a huge betrayal that she been abandoned for a bunch of ‘commoners’. Needless to say, they hardly interacted nowadays.

Hyoyeon sighed inwardly. Who knew the simple decision to accept a prom invitation would make her life so complicated?

But it had been two weeks so she was used to the envious glares by now. Shrugging their comments off – quite literally – she was about to round the corner and face them when NaYoon’s next words made her freeze.

“She’s such a too! It’s so damn unfair.”

“A ? Kim Hyoyeon?... but she hasn’t even dated anyone for as long as I’ve been here!” Hyeri sounded genuinely surprised.

“Oh, it’s because you transferred here in grade 10 so you missed out the whole 9th grade saga!”

“Oh ho gossip?” she could hear the glee in Hyeri’s voice now, “Do tell!”

NaYoon snorted, “It’s funny how I almost forgot about it too! The girl’s been doing a good job of keeping a clean image and everyone else pretends they have collective amnesia or something. But it was quite a scandal because she was the first girl in our grade to lose her v-card!”

“What? Is this the same Kim Hyoyeon?”

“Yeah, there was this transfer student from the States.. I don’t even remember his name .. but those two started dating after like the second week of ninth grade and not even a month later, the little slept with him. Most of us weren't even past the stage of talking to boys yet! Anyhow, she must’ve been bad cause that kid transferred out two weeks later.”

“No way!”

“I swear it happened. Everyone knows about it!”

“How come no one talks about it?”

NaYoon let out a disgusted snicker, “Oh they do, believe me! But no one dares say it to her face cause of her friends. Stupid Kingkas and Queenkas.”

The words were like a physical blow to Hyoyeon. She had been a fool to think that time had erased all those rumors. But this was High School – no one ever gave up the chance to put someone else down.

'Was this what everyone had actually been whispering about these two weeks? Staring at her not out of envy but disgust?'

Dropping the poster boards on the floor, she turned around and walked off blindly. Her steady pace gradually picked up to a frantic run as panic and bile clogged up . She needed air and to get away as far as possible from this place …  

*SMACK*

She ran into something hard.

An apology tumbled from her lips as she kept her head down and moved. But before she could get anywhere. a pair of familiar arms came around her, “Hey Hyorreng! Is everything okay?”

“It’s you!” she collapsed into his embrace without warning, causing the boy’s arms to tighten and brows to furrow in concern.

“Hyo!”

“Air. I need air!” she gasped and he immediately led her out the heavy glass doors.

“It’s ok. You’re ok. I’m here!” he rubbed her back soothingly as they sat on a bench by the trees.

It took a while for her breathing to even out again but Hyukjae waited patiently by her side.

Finally when he was sure that she was better, he gazed at her, “Tell me what happened.”

She broke their eye contact instantly, “N..nothing.. It’s just another one of those sudden panic attacks.”

Ever since she was a little girl, Hyoyeon had always been the type to internalize all her feelings. It became particularly hard after her mother’s death since she did not have any siblings. And being of a highly intuitive nature, she knew her father was devastated at losing the love of his life; she couldn't burden him with her silly problems. So young Hyoyeon would slip into her mother’s closet and remain there until she came up with solutions herself. It was the place she felt closest to her mom – surrounded by the clothes that still had her scent on them – and she liked to pretend that it was her mother speaking in her mind.

But one time, she had somehow locked herself inside the dark closet and suffered the trauma of being trapped there for almost six hours. As a result, she still suffered from these panic episodes from time to time – triggered whenever she was overwhelmed by her suppressed emotions...

“Are you sure?” Hyukjae demanded seriously.

“Positive.”

“Okay then, take a deep breath in… and now out. In.. out. In … out.” Hyoyeon followed along obediently until a tiny smile started to tug at her lips.

The frown lines on Hyukjae’s forehead melted away. Standing up, he held out his hand, “Ready to go back inside?”

She slipped her tiny hand into his and let him lead the way.

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this is the song. i like the lyrics