I'm stupid. I should halt and stop what I'm doing this very moment. ' Stop Yoongi.' I tell myself feeling those hot tears stream down my cheeks but it's too late I've already picked a pretty dress. ' Yes a dress. How more stupid can I be?' I think to myself also fishing for some high heels that can suit this peachy and Lacey dress. I take out a small bag inserted inside the pockets from my suitcase and I places it on top of my dresser. I sit in front of it while starting at myself in the mirror. My eyes are red from the crying, I look like and my mind is clouded with nothing but Kim Namjoon. I have no idea what I'm doing but I miss something...I miss it so much as I want him to say it again.

I dry those tears with the palm of my hands before pushing my long and false hair back and adding foundation, powder, and blush to my face. I decided to wear a red lipstick. my reasons for this? I want to hear him say it again. 

-Earlier- 

" Yoongi I need to talk to you." Namjoon grips on my wrist tightly. I was still feeling sensitive and hurt so I did not want him near me. I snatch my wrist back. 
" Talk to me but don't touch me!" I snap at him already regretting my choice of words. Why am i being so rude? I don't mean it...And what breaks me more is Namjoon's hurt expression of me acting so aggressive. He trembles slightly and purses his lips, he even hesitates before speaking again. 

" Y-Yoongi I just want to speak to you. You're acting odd and I'm concerned. May we please..." he looks around before whispering." Talk privately?" 

I really want to say no. I know he's gonna ask me for the reason I'm the way I am now but truth is I don't know myself but it involves him for sure. " Say what you want to say right here." I say but he becomes uncomfortable. His eyes dilate in disbelief and discontentment, I can see it in his face as he shifts to put his hands inside his back pocket. I can't stand those eyes of him staring...glaring... At me like if I were despicable. His plump lips shiver whether with anger or nervousness and then he just leaves! He's walking away from me! Leaving me! Why did he do that? Does he hate me already? 

I tighten my fist in nervousness, I know I'm doing bad. I want to run after him, hug him and beg him never to leave me ever again, I would apologize over and over again and I want to kiss-Wait no...control yourself Yoongi....But...I think I really do.

" Alright I'm done, let's go to lunch yeah?" Taehyung comes up from behind, placing his hand on my shoulder. I only stare at where Namjoon stormed away and I think to myself how I can't afford to lose him. He's the only one who made me feel safe and protected...The only one who showed me proper kindness and love! He's done so much for me but the only thing I've done is be ungrateful and i pushed him away. It's like I'm never meant to have nice things. " Yoongi are you alright?! Why are you crying!? I hear Taehyung's voice again but this time it's exploding with concern, making me now realize that I am crying and sniffing like a little kid while Taehyung comforts me with both of his hands on my shoulders. " H-hyung..." A small cry escapes my lips and then the rest is blocked like a clog in the sink. 

" What Yoongi!? What is it?" He beacons me. 

" N-Namjoon .." I mumble. Taehyung pauses and hesitates for a moment. 

" What about Namjoon?" 

" Namjoon ." I weep in helplessness. I miss him already, it has become weird to be apart such comforting kindness." He's the only one, he makes me feel safe, he makes me feel loved, I don't." I sob loudly but my words are less audible." I don't want him to go away." In the back of my eyelids, I can see my abuse,my suffrage, my to torture, and loveless parents. I can imagine my blood shedding once more out of the many injuries and finally my life changer Namjoon. It is at this moment that I realize I would do anything and everything for him, I..I love Namjoon Hyung.

3rd pov-

Namjoon stomps frustratedly through the hallway at his school. Students are already downstairs and others are inside the classrooms. Namjoon closes his eyes tightly and opens them again in hope of changing the scenery but still his mind is back to that hallways with Yoongi. A match inside him lights up, scorching like spice, and frustrating like ants stinging your legs. Namjoon stays quiet, biting his lip in order not to throw an angry fit. ' I don't get it at all! Yoongi, what's the matter with him? He was fine holding my hand while walking to school, then out of nowhere he started to cry, he told me he has to say something important but Minah interrupted him before going to the girl's school. ' Namjoon furrows his eyebrows at his own quiet rant before turning the hallway and halting. ' Next I find him with Taehyung, he had a slight smile but his eyes were puffy! He picked an attitude as well and treated me rudely and unfairly.' 

Namjoon closes his eyes tightly again, he will change the scenery back to the mall with Lovely Sara. Back to her smile and playfull giggles, how soft she felt most of the time and when he got to taste her lips. Namjoon's heart starts to beat, he wished he could write this beat into a song and sing his heart out to her with a piano. The song would be slow, but playful, sweet and touching as well, with a touch of happiness. What was supposed to be Sara's image soon translates to her hair getting short and darker, and her small smiling lips starts to frown and quiver, shiny black eyes become watery, the blush on her face is gone, and there he was. Yoongi crying in front of him. To Namjoon it seems like if he were begging, ' I need you.' Is what Yoongi's eyes could express. Namjoon's heart feels like it's longing for someone, something is missing and if he continues this path of frustrations he's gonna lose this missing person forever. 

" Aish." He rolls his eyes turning back around. His steps quickens and quickens until finally he reaches the hallway he was once before. He seizes when he sees Taehyung holding and hugging Yoongi tightly. To his heart He felt betrayed, to his heart it hurts so much seeing this sight, to his heart he felt like he's losing. ' No big deal, Just two friends hugging.' Namjoon thought to himself. ' They won't mind if I suddenly barge in.' He takes one more step. Yoongi hesitates but he raises his arms, wrapping it around Taehyung's waist, just as tightly as he cries on his shoulders. 

Namjoon stopped in place, his heart suddenly feeling scared, worried, and hurt. It beats vigorously on his chest wanting to cry, it's owner doesn't understand. His fist clenches and his eyes are slightly watery. 

Taehyung rest his chin on Yoongi's head, making the hug more intimate. Out from the glass window of one of the classroom he can see Namjoon behind them, he turn his eyes and shares eye contact with the shocked Namjoon who doesn't remove his gaze from Taehyung's. 

The boy smiles, looks back to face the wall. He pulls Yoongi from the hug, now Namjoon can see that Yoongi's eyes are puffy again,

Taehyung gives one more glance at Namjoon from the mirror, smirks and leans down to capture Yoongi's thin lips. 

•<><><><><><><><><><>• 

HOIIIIIIIIII BAK AGAIN!!! *Waves* Miss me anyone? *Grins*