"我"

You Left Me All Alone

"Wěn Wǒ"

 

If someone had asked me why I agreed to take up on Yixing's offer to learn Mandarin, I would have honestly answered, "I have no idea," because that was nothing but the truth. I couldn't tell if he had any ulterior motive behind that strange proposal of his, but since I had promised him that I would allow him to teach me one of the languages of his country, no way was I backing away from that promise. Call me weird, but upon seeing the immense hope and expectation in his dark eyes when he had asked me that question, it was impossible for me to refuse. I couldn't believe it. Was Zhang Yixing turning me into a big softie?

 

It had been decided that we would meet every alternate day at his house for the lessons, since we would need a place quieter and more private -- his words, not mine -- than the public library. I didn't see any problem in that, and Mom was more than willing to let me go, saying something along the lines of me not wasting my holidays doing nothing before the next semester of law school began. Even I thought of it as an opportunity to be able to learn something in the free time that I had. The only activity I had to do was my part time job, and that wasn't fun at all, what with most of the customers being terribly rude and demanding.

On the day of the first lesson, I stood in front of the mirror, giving myself a quick once-over. I had opted for something casual, and was now sporting a light blue T-shirt with a white checkered pattern, faded denim jeans and a dark purple hoodie to counter against the cold weather. I admit I knew nothing about the latest fashion trends, which is why I never bothered with staying updated about them. My short hair tickled the nape of my neck, coming to a rest a couple centimetres above my shoulders as I lazily ran a hand through it, slightly fluffing it up. Slung over one shoulder was a small book bag my mother had gifted me a couple years ago, and now, armed with a few pencils and a notepad, I was ready to face the upcoming challenge head on.

 

I had reassured Yixing at least five times that I remembered the way to his house, and thankfully, my memory did not disappoint me as I found myself staring up at the familiar bungalow. For some reason, I felt nervous at the very thought of visiting Yixing at his place; it was really confusing, because the last time I had been here, I hadn't felt anything of that sort. Taking a deep breath to calm my jittery nerves, I let it out slowly through my nose, before stepping up to ring the doorbell. From within, I heard a male call out, "I'll get it!" followed by the pounding of feet as a certain someone ran up to the front door, hastily swinging it open. His actions did not fail to put me at ease as I let out a soft chuckle, giving him a tiny wave.

"Hello, Yixing," I said, my voice holding an amused note to it as he ushered me inside.

"I'm glad you could make it, Daeun. I hope you didn't have any problems while coming here?" Trust the guy to always act like a gentleman. I shook my head lightly, smiling at him.

"I told you I could find it easily," I said, putting on a tone of mock indignation as I stared up at him, to which he rolled his eyes.

"Yeah, yeah, I get it. Come on, we will begin right away!"

I couldn't help but laugh at his excitement, he really reminded me of a five-year-old sometimes. I realised, though, that I was beginning to get used to the quick changes in his moods. One moment, he seemed to be pondering over something serious, but the next, he would burst out laughing to himself about some incident in the past that he had suddenly recalled.

"You are such a terrible host, Yixing," I said while putting on my best you-disappoint-me face. "You should have at least asked me for something to eat or drink."

Instantly, Yixing paled, frozen to his spot as he looked at me, a faint blush coating his cheek a few seconds later.

"I'm so sorry! Um.. would you like to have some tea or coffee? Oh, or maybe a glass of orange juice? Or how about I make you a little snack?"

Okay, so one more thing I found out just recently: I would never get tired of teasing Yixing; his flustered reactions were way too priceless to ever miss up on such a chance.

I snorted loudly before dissolving into fits of laughter, holding a hand to my stomach as I doubled over. Once my laughter died down -- which took a few minutes -- I peeked up at the guy, only to see him frowning at me in the cutest possible manner. Placing a hand on his shoulder, I gave it a few light pats, before grinning at him. "It's fine, my dear friend," I said, before bursting into a fresh bout of giggles. "Geez, you make it so easy and fun to tease you!"

"It's not funny, Daeun," Yixing whined -- literally whined -- as he crossed his arms across his chest, pouting at me like a lost puppy. That just made me giggle more as I lightly swatted at his arm.

"Okay, I'm sorry. Let's begin."

I was kind of beginning to regret my actions, as touching him only managed to leave a funny sensation on my hand. I ignored the warmth that was currently spreading through my body as I followed him inside the kitchen, sitting next to him at the dining table.

 

Just four lessons into it, and already, I was beginning to feel better about this whole thing. I had this weird sense of pride for being such a fast learner when it came to Mandarin. Asian languages were fun to learn, I guess. Maybe I could learn Japanese while I was at it; that would be helpful in watching anime, even if I didn't watch a lot of it.

Even Yixing was impressed with my performance so far, and the way he gave me those looks full of joy and said how proud he was of me sent a wave of tingles through my body, leaving my heart beating rapidly.

I couldn't help but be confused at the whirlwind of emotions that got a hold of me during every moment that I spent with Yixing. I was satisfied with my overall language learning skills, however, and pushed all other thoughts to the back of my mind as I headed to his place for the next lesson. This time, I had chosen to dress myself into something more girly, having worn an embroidered white blouse and a pair of slim black leggings.

As always, Yixing opened the door with that bright, cheerful smile of his as he let me in. That smile was enough to lighten my mood, even on the worst of days. I had never met his parents during any of my trips to his house, but his grandmother always greeted me with an endearing smile, and never failed to give us snacks to munch on while we studied.

As he led me to our usual spot at the dining table, I could feel his eyes on me. Turning to face him, I saw a look in his eyes that seemed slightly foreign to me. He had never looked at me that way before.

"Jīntiān nǐ zhèngzài xúnzhǎo piàoliang."

It took a while for my brain to process that he had said something to me in the very language I had been learning for the past few days. I sighed. So much for being a fast learner.

He had spoken faster than when he did while teaching me, and I could only catch the first three words. Today, I look...? Was he trying to say how this style of clothing did not suit me at all? If so, I would have been glad to go back to wearing clothes that were way more comfortable than dresses or skirts. Not that I would really let his preferences influence my choices all the time. Just saying.

Yixing was quick to notice the utterly perplexed expression on my face, and let out a laugh as he led me to one of the chairs at the dining table, asking me to sit down before planting himself on the one next to me. He propped up an elbow on the table as he watched me take out my notepad and a pencil, chin resting in his palm. There was still that unfamiliar way in which he gazed at me, before grinning softly.

"You seriously can't have forgotten what I've been teaching you so soon, Daeun," he said in a tone of mock dismay, before clearing his throat.

"You're looking pretty today," he repeated, a little louder this time, stressing on each word and its pronunciation.

Okay, so yes, I had been tutored well enough to be able to completely understand what he had said. Which just made things worse, because it set my face on fire a lot quicker than it would have if he had said the same exact sentence in Korean. With my cheeks now a bright red, I had to resort to staring down at the pencil in my hand, absently twirling it.

"T-thank you," I stuttered, wondering why I hadn't worn something like this before if it would have elicited such a compliment from Yixing. Secretly, I was feeling ecstatic, but I fought to keep the blush off my face as I finally glanced at him, smirking slightly.

"Just today?" I asked, narrowing my eyes playfully, impressing myself at the command I had got over the basics of Mandarin. Once again, I had the pleasure of watching him being caught off guard as he choked on air, then proceeded to splutter something incoherent, that was totally not understandable to me, even with how close the two of us were sitting.

"N-no, of course not! I mean..." Yixing switched into full-on ramble mode as he averted his gaze, and his nervousness made him speak in his native language, leaving me confused yet laughing as he spouted words in Mandarin at a speed that was too fast for me to comprehend, much less try and translate.

My laughter made him trail off, and he gave me a dimpled smile before shaking his head lightly. "What I meant was, you always look pretty, no matter what you're wearing," he said, switching back to Korean as he made sure that I understood every single word he had said.

That set my blush off again, and I coughed, losing any sort of composure that I had tried so hard to gain.

"Really Yixing, please stop with the compliments already," I begged, hunching over the notepad as I silently signaled him to begin the day's class. It wasn't that his flattering remarks made me uncomfortable, but the way he was showering me with praises was making me blush terribly, and it was taking all of my self-control to not comment about how good he was looking in his dark denims and collared T-shirt, the light shade of the T-shirt going extremely well with his dark and messy -- albeit adorably styled -- hair.

Apparently, he finally noticed my sudden eagerness to start the lesson, and after laughing to himself, began teaching me the next set of words, characters and phrases. Yixing was quite an admirable teachers, admittedly much better than some of the professors at my college. The way he taught managed to grab your attention easily, and I would rarely get bored during his 'lectures'. Whenever I pestered him with questions, he would answer them with startling patience, no matter how silly some of the doubts were. I realised that he hadn't been lying when he had promised me that it would be an enjoyable experience; I was most definitely enjoying myself. Also, like I had pointed out, him being the tutor was an added bonus, for it meant getting to spend more time with him, which I had begun to look forward to every day.

 

Getting absorbed in learning, I lost track of time, and pretty soon, it was time to wrap things up for the day. I leaned back in the chair, stretching my arms above my head as I let out a long yawn, Yixing cracking the bones in his neck beside me. I was about to stand up, but stopped as a hand lightly clamped down on my shoulder, making me promptly sit back down as I stared questioningly at Yixing.

"Just one last phrase for the day, Daeun," he explained, the corners of his lips twitching upwards.

My shoulders sagged as I frowned, sighing deeply. "But time is up for the day, come on," I said, putting on my best whiny voice. Seeing him arch an eyebrow, though, I piped down, nodding in reluctance.

Grinning faintly, he leaned forward in his chair excitedly, not bothering to write down the words. "All right, repeat: wěn wǒ."

Tilting my head to a side, I cleared my throat, before saying, "when wǒ."

Yixing chuckled at my incorrect pronunciation, shaking his head. "It's not when, Daeun. It's pronounced like one," he said, holding up a finger to illustrate. "Say it again."

"Wěn wǒ," I repeated, saying the words more clearly, satisfied at myself when I saw his grin widen, knowing I had said it correctly this time. "But what does it mean?" I asked, frowning again.

My frown faded as I saw how Yixing had begun to bring his face closer to mine, his eyes fluttering close as he leaned in, a bit too close for comfort. My heart hammered in my chest as my gaze flickered to his lips, and the next second, they met mine as he planted a soft, sweet kiss on them. My mouth seemed to have a mind of its own as it returned the kiss, his lips loving and warm as they sent a fuzzy feeling throughout my body. I wasn't that surprised at myself, though, for I could explain the situation in only one word.

Natural.

 

A few seconds into the lip lock, and my head was ready to start spinning at the sheer intensity of the feelings we were emptying into it. However, Yixing was the first one to break the kiss, slightly breathless as he stared at me, the look in his eyes that could be described as... love? Was I dreaming when I imagined that he seriously loved me?

"I know this was too sudden, Daeun, and I'm not going to apologise for the kiss, because you kissed me back," he said, his voice surprisingly cocky as he threw me a smug smile. Although, I was sure that there was a slight pink tint visible on his cheeks as he continued gazing at me.

"Are you even going to tell me the reason behind your actions?" I countered, my brows furrowed together in a little frown, even though I had an idea of what he was going to say.

"Isn't it obvious? I like you, Daeun. More than just a friend, of course," he added, and I knew my guess was right. That didn't stop me from badgering him with more questions.

"But what about that day in the basement? You let go of me as if I was something untouchable. Also, what about your behaviour before that? And why were you ignoring me after the basement incident?"

Yixing put his hands up in front of him, palms facing me as he chuckled. "Whoa, that's a lot of questions all at once! They all have the same answer, though," he said, shrugging a bit before he turned sheepish. "I thought you were dating Kyungsoo, and I didn't want to be someone who tried to steal a guy's girlfriend." He rubbed a hand to the back of his neck, letting out a nervous laugh.

I couldn't help but let the bubble of laughter escape, shaking my head before mulling over his previous words, the confession. Letting out an awkward cough, I turned away for a few seconds, then looked back at him. "I... I like you too, Yixing," I said, feeling immensely relieved at what I had just admitted, finally being able to realise the meaning behind all the feelings I had when it came to Yixing.

There was just one thing he had left in the dark, however.

"Hey, you never told me what wěn wǒ means."

That smirk was back on his face, almost making me want to wipe it off as he proceeded to send a lopsided grin my way.

"It means kiss me."

What...? It dawned on me that I had just been tricked by this guy.

"Zhang Yixing!"

 

Author's Note:

Allow me to say: Finally!!

Haha, another awkward kissing scene, though. Yeesh.

Oh, and I know nothing about Mandarin, everything that I have written in this chapter has been copied from Google translate (it's such a confusing language oh God, multiple meanings for the same phrases and stuff). It might be obvious, but just as a note, the dialogues in italics have been said in Mandarin. Also, the 'one' that I have written in bold is supposed to be English. The title written in Mandarin also translates to kiss me.

 

Hope you enjoyed, dear readers! 

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EmberYouth
I can't promise about today's update, sorry guys...

Comments

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Adi345 #1
Chapter 10: Oh dear! I loved it. This is so sweet. I mean 'Yixing'. And that 'I approve of your boyfriend'. I missed you so much. Is it going to be thursdays again? Will be waiting!! <3
Adi345 #2
Where the hell had I been? I missed this so bad. Thank you so much for coming back. I've not yet begun reading the next chapter. So wait up for a moment.
xoxo_88_kiss #3
Chapter 10: I understand :) I will fully support you and respect your decision.
Chronica
#4
Chapter 9: Omg
I died of cuteness
Adi345 #5
Chapter 9: Bless this story, everyone!
So cute. I literally died fangirling.
:')
Adi345 #6
Chapter 8: Aye! The positive vibes. The story moving ahead and it couldn't be any better.
<3 .
Adi345 #7
Chapter 8: If you could just complete this one.
I don't mind if it takes days or months.
I was so damn in love with the plot.
Please.
Adi345 #8
Chapter 8: I didn't want this to end like this.
I checked this daily, just in case, if you updated.
I'm literally crying.
This one was so good.
I wish it could last longer.
Adi345 #9
Chapter 7: So it's here.
Finally.
So cute and relatable.
<3