Son Naeun [Epilogue]

                When people told me two weeks ago that I will fell in love with a person I least expected to be, I would’ve told them that that could just be a dream. If they tell me I’ll fell in love with Jung Eunji, I would tell them that they are delusional.

                If I told them that way before, I guess I have to eat back my words because yes, in just a span of two weeks, I learned to love Jung Eunji.

                I didn’t expect it to happen at all. It was like a whirlwind where you got into some fast spin and your world just turns upside down from beautiful into a nightmare. A nightmare, yes, since no matter how high that storm could take me, it will still leave me back in cold hard ground, probably with the fact that I can never have Jung Eunji. Not in the way we all must’ve wished and imagined at least.

                She doesn’t love me. She can’t.

                I know she can’t…

                It was the seventh day when we actually arrived to our destination. Her mom and dad seem to be waiting for us in the front doors of the huge mansion but I didn’t even bother greeting them or anything. All I did was grab my bag and walk through the doors. No, I did stop in front of a maid and asked her where will I stay for the night. She showed the prepared room for me. I didn’t even bother saying thank you at least and went in, locking the door as I did.

                And when the doors were locked, I let the tears fall already.

                They said that Karma isn’t a bad thing. Somehow it teaches you a lesson. I’ve learned my lesson. Maybe I shouldn’t have played with all of those people’s hearts. Maybe now… Maybe now I won’t feel like such a loser for falling in love.

                Maybe love is indeed a game where the first one loses. Maybe.

                I stood by the door, trying to wipe my tears away but to no avail. I stopped it from pouring ever since that afternoon, for the rest of the ride I was cold and reserved, only speaking when needed. But now, all the exhaustion from hiding my real feelings finally came to me and wouldn’t stop.

                It hurts…

                “N-naeun-ah!” I heard Eunji’s voice on the other side. She was knocking the door a little forcefully, hoping to hear even a single word probably. “N-naeun-ah, let’s talk please? D-don’t do this to me!”

                I bit my lips to prevent me from even releasing a cry. After a while she stopped knocking and probably just walked away. As she did, I collapsed on the floor and continued sobbing. The tears I’ve wished to disappear couldn’t help but fall like rain. It was hopeless… so much…

                There’s another knock on the door, this time it wasn’t that kid.

                “Naeun-ssi…? It’s me, Eunji’s mom. Can I come in?”

                Out of respect and guilt from my rude behavior, I stood up and composed myself for a bit before facing her for a while. And when I did, I opened the door for her.

                I guess I looked so messy that she can’t help but sigh and hugged me. As she comforted me, I can’t help but burst my sobs again. She closed the door and let me let it all away, whispering soothing words in my ears to calm me down.

                It was working… until she said those words.

                “I swear Eunji loves you… whatever you fought with will pass away, got it? So stop crying…”

                Fortunately in a way, it made me stop crying too and release a bitter laugh in the corner of my brain. She doesn’t love me. This is all just an act between the two of us.

                “She doesn’t love me.” I coldly said as I looked at the thick curtains of the room. “I’m probably just no one to her…”

                I saw Eunji’s mom shook her head as she carefully patted my head.

                “Love is not a game, Naeun-ssi… unlike what people has said. People just fall in love and maybe not have that love reciprocated. People are just busy creating quotes and telling stories that would hit other people, making them think that yes, maybe it is a dangerous game when it’s not. You just love and be loved. And when that love is not reciprocated, you move on and let someone find you and fix you. Maybe that’s the real story planned for you…”

                “W-what does that supposed to mean?”

                She shrugged and chuckled, something I noticed the Jungs must’ve possessed.

                “As for Eunji, she might’ve been confused. You are her first relationship ever, Son Naeun. She has never had any interests for love or even romance. Well she did like someone before but you are different. And I think you are special because whatever relationship she has with you, she wouldn’t have involved in it if you weren’t special…”

                The way she said that, it makes me wonder if she knows something. She didn’t say anything but the way she speaks, she must’ve suspected us. Still… I am Jung Eunji’s first…?

                “But am I special enough…?”

                Mrs. Jung just smiled sweetly before planting a kiss on my hair like a mom, “Who knows, maybe you are more than enough… wait for my daughter. She’ll get into it soon.”

                She left me alone then and left me with some food in lunch. I was stuck on my room for the whole day… until it was six pm that something happened.

                Mrs. Jung knocked on the door as usual and asked me if I wanted to go out and have dinner. I said no, saying I am still tired from all the adventures of the past weeks.

                So I was left in a lonely atmosphere, with me just sitting next to window, having my knees up in the chair and hugging it tightly in my arms. It was still February and the air was still somehow chilly because of the season. I let the breeze went inside my room and just feel it, hoping for the pain to go away…

                The Hello Kitty bear Jung Eunji has given me days before were sitting silently on the table next to me, looking at me. Unknowingly, I started punching it to release my annoyance.

                “You stupid cat. Can’t you just go back to your master and scold her for being stupid? I love her and yet she kept hurting me…”

                I continued hitting it until…

                “Hey! You shouldn’t hit something I gave you with all my heart!”

                I was shocked by the voice that I immediately turned my head to the door, expecting that Jung Eunji to be standing there. She wasn’t there though. I tried looking around but found no one which instantly gives me the creeps.

                “Yah, where are you?!” I screamed in both fear and annoyance. “Stop disturbing me, please!”

                “I’m down here, idiot!” she screamed once again and this time I looked at the window, and from down there, is Jung Eunji, sitting in the hood of the truck, looking up back at me.

                “W-what are you doing there?” I asked with a frown. “You are ruining the view…”

                She frowned, “No… It was the background that ruins my view. I’m too good-looking for its darkness!”

                “Tsss… so arrogant.” I muttered, in which she pouted.

                Just then I noticed some of her friends came into view, wearing matching white polo shirts and some even holding guitars and flowers. My eyebrows rose at those guys who were grinning up at me.

                “Yah Jung Eunji… W-what are you doing????"

                She glanced casually at her friends before shrugging. “I’m saying sorry.”

                And then she started singing as her friends started playing music and back up singing.

“You know I’d fall apart without you,

I don’t know how you do what you do

‘Cause everything that don’t make sense about me

It makes sense when I’m with you…”

                I knew the song as soon as she sings it and it literally got my heart beating. I know the song. I know the title. I know what it says… and upon realizing what song it is…

“Like everything that’s green girl! I need you

But it’s more than one and one makes two

So put aside the math and the logic of it

You gotta know you’re wanted too…”

                I felt my knees weaken that I was thankful I was sitting in a chair or else I would’ve collapsed down. Her voice was always angelic but every time she sings in front of me, it takes my breath away. It was few nights before when she sang for me and got me falling for her. And now I fell in too deep. Maybe falling hurts and breaks… But her voice was healing me enough… crazy, I must say.

“’Cause I wanna wrap you up

Wanna kiss your lips

I, I wanna make you feel wanted

I wanna call you mine

Wanna hold your hand forever

And never let you forget it

Yeah, I… I wanna make you feel wanted…”

                I saw how she looked back at me that moment… How she sang those words loud and clearly. I was hoping that it was all true, and maybe not just an act. That’s when I remembered that I literally made a scene earlier. She must’ve done this to show her family that we would be