To Know

Hold me in my dreams
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“Chanyeol, will you accept me in your home even for a while?” Baekhyun asks, still being held in Chanyeol’s arms. He looks into his eyes, and Baekhyun sees the confusion and shock marring those beautiful orbs. He’s only looked at it for a few times and Baekhyun already feels like drowning in them.

He can’t understand the overwhelming emotions threatening to consume him. But instead of being afraid and wanting to run away from it, he instinctively wants to embrace it wholeheartedly. Emotions, whispers in his mind that he cannot hear telling him to go and take the plunge.

“You can say if you don’t want me to,” he adds meekly after Chanyeol took to long to respond. Chanyeol looks at him and smiles. He can see the insecurity oozing from Baekhyun’s pores. His darling, confident and strong Baekhyun, afraid of his answer when he didn’t even need to ask. He’ll give him the moon if he does so much as ask for it.

“Of course, Baekhyun. What you should know, however, before you start to live with us and get to know us again,” he pauses for dramatic effect, and Baekhyun eagerly listens on. “... is that, I can’t say no to you ever, sweetheart. Even if you may never remember our past memories again, I’d like you to never forget about this. I can never say no to you, love. Not before, not now, and not ever.”

Baekhyun nods his head. Chanyeol looks so determined to convince him, but deep inside, he still feels shy about his decision and request. But for once, he wants to be selfish. He wants to know the little angel Chanhyun and be the father he was supposed to be.

Other matters, he could deal with later, but for now, he wants to choose himself. He wants to choose happiness. And happiness means being with Chanhyun and getting to know him. Be the father he only wished he could be to the little boy, and now is suddenly happening to him.

“Thank you, Chanyeol. For letting me have this chance.”

Chanyeol his hair lovingly and puts his hands on his shoulders. “And thank you for wanting to know us again. For wanting to know Chanhyun. God knows that’s my only wish for my son all these years : for our son, and that is that he gets to meet and be with you. Be with his other father that I knew loved him very much, and I know you will love him very much, Baekhyun. Because that’s how amazing you are. So thank you for making this dream of mine come true.”

 

 

 

 

 

The car stops in front of the coffee shop where everyone is waiting for the two of them. Especially Chanhyun who has been asking his dad where he’s been the past few days and has been wondering what happened to his appa. Chanyeol internally wonders how he’s going to react once he finds out Baekhyun really is his other father. That what Chanhyun thought is just pretend is actually the reality of their situation.

Jongin is also there since Baekhyun wanted to announce his decision to all of them at the same time. He also needs to talk to him and Jongdae for this to be kept a secret from his parents, especially his mother who would most likely go berserk. A cancellation of their engagement is also in order, and the repercussions of which is honestly something Baekhyun doesn’t want to think about yet. He’s not ready for that.

For now, he just wants to enjoy the days he could spend with Chanhyun and finally be his father. A chance his mother took away from him when she lied to him and made him believe that there wasn’t something missing in his life. When in fact, it has. A lot has been missing from his life, his heart, his entire being. Half of his life is missing and his parents thought it was best that it stayed that way.

That’s about to change from this day onwards. He’s going to be the Byun Baekhyun he decides to be, not someone shaped and molded by his parents into the heir they want him to be.

That’s over. The Byun Baekhyun that’s standing now, outside Chanyeol’s coffee shop, is not a puppy anymore, nor will he ever be a puppy anymore.

 

However, being nervous is inevitable. A lot of lives will change once he and Chanyeol enters the shop’s doors. Baekhyun sighs, deep and troubled. Chanyeol hears it and smiles a little, understanding what must be going on in Baekhyun’s heart.

“It’s okay, Baekhyun. Come here.” Chanyeol extends his hand, and Baekhyun shyly accepts it. The CEO has made a decision that he hopes he won’t regret in the future. He’s asked to live with Chanhyun and Chanyeol, if only to be able to know them again.

He needs to know them again. The feeling of safety Chanyeol’s hug has given him made him decide to do this. To do the right thing and choose what his heart is telling him. And so, he asked him to allow him to live with them, even for a few months, weeks, days, Baekhyun will accept it. Just to be given a chance to be with Chanhyun and live as his father. As his real father and not just a pretend one.

Together and hand in hand, they enter the vicinity wherein they are all waiting for them around one table. The conversations going on stop when they saw Chanyeol and Baekhyun walking in. Baekhyun looks to the ground in shyness. What happened to the once cold CEO he had become because of heartbreak?

It’s because the ice is melted by the warmth given by Chanyeol’s hand in his. And by the comfort Chanyeol’s presence alone provides him. Baekhyun can’t help but be jealous over the him from the past that got to experience being loved and loving Chanyeol.

 

“Daddy!” Chanhyun screams and runs towards his father. Chanyeol had to let go of Baekhyun’s hand for a moment so he could catch his over excited child in his arms. After securing Chanhyun in his arms, Chanyeol reached for Baekhyun’s hand again and held it, not noticing the blush creeping on Baekhyun’s cheek over the action. Chanyeol didn’t notice it, but everyone else did and chose not to comment on it.

“And appa!” Chanhyun once again exclaims once he sees Baekhyun standing beside Chanyeol. Because of his over excitement at seeing his father again, he failed to notice that it was his appa that came with his daddy.

Baekhyun smiles at the child, his child, and brings his free hand to Chanhyun’s face. The feeling of love over this child is already overwhelming even when he thought he was the child of another. Now, it is more consuming. He feels his entire being just wanting to live for this child safely carried by Chanyeol’s arms.

Baekhyun is finally savoring the moment of finally seeing Chanhyun as his own and not someone else’s. The feeling of guilt he once felt because of wanting the child of someone else now gone from his heart. Because Chanhyun is his child, his and Chanyeol’s child. It still hasn’t sunk in deep inside.

Chanhyun then reaches out for him and Baekhyun, although confused, accepts him in his arms. Chanyeol watches them with a fond look and a soft smile. This is his wish happening in front of him and really, he’s just so happy that Baekhyun accepted them, especially Chanhyun, in his heart.

Someone clears their throat and brings the family’s attention back to the people who has been watching them for a while now. Xiumin looks so nostalgic and close to tears, Luhan is smiling happily at the reunion, Jongdae looks glad as well to see Baekhyun’s smile reach his eyes, and Sehun and Jongin looks confused. It is the latter that cleared his throat and asked, “Baekhyun, what’s happening here?”

Holding tighter to Chanhyun, Baekhyun addresses them, “I-I have something to say.” He meets Luhan’s eyes and the detective nods at him. “But, but first can we have some privacy?” Baekhyun requests, referring to the three of them: him, Chanyeol and Chanhyun. Chanyeol also smiles at his friends, trying to reassure them that everything with him is fine. Minseok nods in understanding, Sehun still looks lost but he will know the truth soon enough.

After everyone nods in agreement; Jongin, Jongdae and Sehun still being lost about what’s happening, Chanyeol guides his family inside the office inside the coffee shop. Once inside, Baekhyun and Chanyeol sits Chanhyun down by the sofa and kneels in front of him.

They are lost as to how to break it to the child who’s currently staring at them curiously. Like a child full of wonder, Chanhyun is still innocent as to how their lives will never be the same anymore. And hopefully, it is only for the better.

“Chanhyun, son,” Chanyeol starts, the child’s hair in comfort. Chanhyun grins at his father, humming and asking, “What is it, daddy?”

Baekhyun can’t help but coo at the cuteness of this child. Now that he knows that Chanhyun really was his, he can’t help but notice the resemblance the child has with him and Chanyeol. Like a perfect combination of them two, Chanhyun got features equally from his two dads.

“Remember when you said you found appa?” Chanhyun nods at this and reaches out to Baekhyun. “Appa! This is appa.” Baekhyun takes his son and places him on his lap. Nothing is now hindering him from wrapping Chanhyun in his arms so he does it, and pulls the other closer to him. He sees Chanyeol smile at the image and hides his blush behind Chanhyun’s head. At the same time, smelling his hair and giving him kisses.

Chanyeol pats Chanhyun’s head lovingly and agrees. This time, wholeheartedly and not with a heart that was mourning for what he thought was the memory of his dead husband.

“Yes.” Chanyeol gulps, shares a look with Baekhyun and smiles a smile full of happiness. “Remember when I said that Appa is dead and it was impossible that he would be appa?”
Chanhyun nods, pouts and looks down in sadness. “Yes, daddy. But appa said I can call him that even if he’s not really my real appa.”

The parents share a worried look when they heard sniffles coming from the child in their arms.

“Hey, why are you crying baby?” Chanyeol wipes Chanhyun’s innocent tears from his face. “There is no need to cry.”

“B-but?”

“I’m here to tell you some good news, Chanhyun. So please stop crying, okay?” Chanhyun sniffs one more time and then nods. He wipes his wet cheeks using his little palms and made the two chuckle at his cuteness. Baekhyun’s overwhelmed. His heart feels like bursting of affection for the child in his arms and he’s only known him to be his son for a few days at most. Even so, his heart has always known.

“Yes, baby, stop crying now, okay? For appa?” Baekhyun turns Chanhyun on his lap and the child nods, hugging him after. Baekhyun laughs and hugs the child just as tight as he’s currently holding him.

Chanyeol melts at the sight. He never thought even in his wildest dreams that he would get to see this with his own eyes. It’s lovely and beyond what Chanyeol ever wished and imagined.

Baekhyun offers his hand that’s around Chanhyun to Chanyeol. His eyes widen in shock, but he quickly accepts Baekhyun’s offer and holds unto it. They’re holding hands while Baekhyun has Chanhyun securely around his arms.

“What is it then appa, daddy?” Chanhyun mumbles, still nestled in Baekhyun’s chest.

“We just wanted to tell you that you can call me appa because I am your real appa,” Baekhyun whispers, unable to take it anymore, unable to control the tears from falling.

Chanyeol smiles at him reassuringly. “Baekhyun appa is really your appa, baby.” He repeats to a confused Chanhyun.

Chanhyun scrunches his forehead in confusion but he slowly starts to understand what his parents are trying to tell him. “Baekhyun appa is… my appa?” He asks, unsure.

Chanyeol nods at him and caresses his head. “Yes, baby. Appa has come back to be with us.”

“Chanhyunie has an appa? My real appa?” Chanhyun points to himself while asking his daddy this question. Chanyeol nods, also crying now. “Chanhyunie has an appa now.”

“Baekhyun appa, is this true?” The child looks up to ask the man holding him now. Baekhyun’s smile was so lovely as he nods and answers yes. “I’m sorry appa wasn’t with you for a long time, but I promise appa will be with you from now on, okay?”

“Okay,” Chanhyun agrees, tears falling once again. Baekhyun and Chanyeol just holds him tight in their arms, their shared hug a symbol of how they won’t ever break apart again. Baekhyun will make sure that it won’t happen again.

 

After that, Baekhyun has to let Chanhyun go even if it was against his wishes and his instincts. For he only wants to hold the child in his arms, and not ever part with him ever again. But he has to do this next and talk to Jongdae and Jongin.

 

“Baekhyun, what’s happening?” Jongin asks.

“Mr. Byun, what will you do next?” Jongdae voices out, having been there when Chanyeol said that he was Baekhyun’s husband.

They’re seating in a secluded area, just the three of them for he had requested some privacy.

“I need to apologize first. I’m sorry you had to experience that.” Baekhyun smiles deprecatingly. “I never had a fainting episode for years now, and I thought I was already okay but my brain wasn’t able to handle the shock when I first saw Chanyeol.”

Jongin’s brows furrowed in confusion. “Do you mean to tell me that what I’ve been hearing was true?” No one has really told them anything after having been left with Sehun and Chanhyun that day Baekhyun fainted. However, he had heard a rumor of Chanyeol being Baekhyun’s husband from Sehun during the days he spent at the coffee shop.

Baekhyun nods, and looks him in the eyes. “I’m married and Chanhyun is my son, but my parents didn’t tell me about it. They made me believe that those years of lost memories were irrelevant to my life.” His hands are clenching the table in anger. “They made me lose my family and I-”

Jongin reaches out and holds Baekhyun’s clenched fists comfortingly. “I understand, Baekhyun. Don’t get yourself worked up too much over it right now. You should be happy first that you finally know the truth.”

Baekhyun smiles at him gratefully. “Thank you, Jongin. Even if we didn’t get to know each other well, I can feel that you are a kind soul.”

Jongin lets his hand go and laughs. “I don’t know about that. But I guess it’s only right that I assume that our engagement is now over?”

“I have to apologize,” Baekhyun starts but Jongin cuts him off with a laugh. “I was just kidding, Baekhyun. Our engagement never even started in the first place, so there’s nothing to apologize for.”

Baekhyun smiles in relief, thankful for having an understanding arranged fianceé. “Thank you.”

Jongin shrugs. “Don’t get me wrong, you’re handsome and I bet you’re amazing, but I wasn’t really planning on going on with this engagement. I was just humoring my parents that’s why I agreed to meet you, but I wasn’t really planning on marrying you. Of course, unless we’ve fallen in love,” Jongin smirks, “which I believe is an impossible thing to happen.”

Jongin pointedly stares by the counter where Chanyeol is sneakily watching them in worry. Baekhyun follows his gaze and meets Chanyeol’s eyes, the former blushes and looks away as Chanyeol waves at him to tell him if something is wrong.

“I-I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Baekhyun denies and Jongin just laughs in mirth.

“Sure, Mr. Byun. Whatever you say.”

After Jongin’s laughter, Baekhyun turns serious again and addresses the two of them. “I have a request to make if it’s possible,” he says, looking at Jongdae and Jongin.

Jongdae smiles at his friend and boss, “Whatever it is, Baekhyun. I’m here to help you in any way I can.”

Baekhyun thanks him; Jongin says that he will help him to the best of his abilities as well.

“It’s nothing big, but can you keep this from my parents at the moment? I want to enjoy the time I have with my son first and I know my mother won’t let it happen once she hears of this.” His face hardens at the thought of his parents and what his mother could possibly do.

“I promise you I won’t say anything and I will keep this a secret.” Jongdae smiles at him for the first time, takes his hand and squeezes it reassuringly. “You don’t have to worry about work as well. I’ll take care of it while you’re here.”

“I couldn’t possibly…”

“No, Baekhyun. You deserve this time to spend with your lost family. You not only lost them when you lost your memory, but they lost you as well. It’s just right that you spend time together.”

“Yes, Baekhyun. Don’t worry I’ll stay here and pretend I’m spending time with my fianceé. As long as they don’t suspect that something is off, everything will be okay.”

“Thank you. I’m so grateful that you’re both supportive of me. Truthfully, I’m nervous and I wouldn’t know what to do if you didn’t agree to help me with this.”

“No worries, boss. I knew the connection and similarities you had with Chanhyun couldn’t have been a coincidence. I can see the resemblance the boy had with you, it was undeniable.”

Baekhyun laughs and beams with pride and happiness. “We are look alikes aren’t we?”

“You are.” Jongdae agrees. “What are your plans?”

“I already asked and Chanyeol already agreed that I stay with them if only to spend time with Chanhyun and get to know him better as his father.”

“Is it only Chanhyun you want to get to know better?” Jongin teases once again and Baekhyun turns beet red.

“O-of course I want to get to know Chanyeol better too. After all, he is still my husband as well.”

Jongin and Jongdae both snicker at him.

 

 

”What is it Chanyeol? Why are you being so secretive?” Baekhyun giggles, hands reaching out to nowhere as his blindfolded self had no choice but to follow his husband. Chanyeol told him to trust him and that’s what Baekhyun’s going to do.

“It’s a surprise, baby. Don’t worry, we’re almost there.” Chanyeol whispers near his ear, and although innocently said, Baekhyun can’t help the effect of his deep voice on him. But in his defense, everything his husband does affect him whether it be ually or just simply making him happy.

Baekhyun laughs then, giving up with asking. He just let Chanyeol guide him to his surprise for him, his first gift as his husband according to Chanyeol. He’s very much excited to see what it could be that Chanyeol is this excited and secretive.

He hears a door opening and closing, his brows furrowing behind the cloth covering his eyes. Where did Chanyeol take him that he had to be this mysterious? Chanyeol seems excited though, and by that alone, Baekhyun himself is excited to know what’s making his other half happy.

“We’re here,” Chanyeol exclaims joyously like a child, Baekhyun grins.

“Can I take off my blindfold then?” He asks.

“No, not yet. Just let me,” Chanyeol says, softly maneuvering Baekhyun around. Once satisfied, Chanyeol goes to his back and touches his shoulders. “There. Are you ready, babe?”

Baekhyun rolls his eyes even if the other couldn’t see him. “I’ve been ready since earlier baby.” He teases the other. Chanyeol whines, while Baekhyun can’t help but laugh.

“Okay, here we go, 1, 2,” Chanyeol counts down, unknotting his blindfold at the count of three. Baekhyun blinks his eyes, trying to adjust first and gasps when he finally saw what it was. Baekhyun looks behind him, gaze questioning, and Chanyeol just nods at him. A confirmation for his unspoken question.

“It’s… beautiful, Chanyeol.” Baekhyun words out, looking around and then tearing up. He jumps into his husband’s arms, crying. “Does this really mean what I think it means?”

Chanyeol laughs, kisses his husband’s forehead and nods. “Yes, Baekhyun. Finally, a home for us. Just you and me.”

Baekhyun hugs Chanyeol tighter. His husband, his happiness and the man he loves the most. “Thank you. I love you.”

“I love you too.” Chanyeol answers back, tearing up himself now. “I’m sorry it’s not as grand as your old house but I promise-”

Baekhyun stops him with a peck on his lips. Chanyeol’s eyes widens, “No, Chanyeol. This is perfect. Anywhere with you is perfect. I don’t care even if it’s ugly, even if it’s small, even if it’s not as grand and beautiful as my old house, because having you with me is already enough. What good is my mansion if I don’t have you living there with me?”

Chanyeol blushes, unable to answer Baekhyun’s heartfelt message. Instead, he kisses him back and this time more passionate and longer than the earlier one.

“Then, how about christening this place together?” Chanyeol whispers, taking a giggling Baekhyun into his arms.

 

“Baekhyun?” Chanyeol’s voice wakes Baekhyun up from the sudden barrage of images in his head. The CEO is brought back to the present and he smiles uncertainly at Chanyeol and Chanhyun. The former realizing what’s happening with him, tries to reassure him. “It’s okay, Baekhyun.”

He’s holding Chanhyun in his arms while he’s holding the door open for them and Baekhyun who was still stuck at their walkway. Baekhyun lets out a sigh and takes Chanhyun’s offered hand to him. “It’s okay app

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touchofbeige
ive been updating this in ao3 and havent been active here for the past few months, really. so i just posted all the chapters in one go. this is now completed hehe

Comments

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Hyunnielove
#1
Chapter 10: It's so great ❤️
Beau1996 1354 streak #2
Chapter 10: So enjoyable - I loved how Chanhyun recognized his appa first!! Thanks for a great story author-nim ✌️
Chinnuz-Minnuz123 #3
Chapter 10: Please write a sekai story based on jongin is a model and sehun is an ordinary working boy please
teufelchen_netty #4
Chapter 10: nice ending =)
Stroisl #5
Chapter 7: I really love that story!! I'm even crying while reading!

just one lil complain:
you should check the years the haven't seen each other... you say Chanhyun is 4 years old, Baekhyun was 2 years in coma and is now 2 years awake... out can't work like that, except he gave birth to Chanhyun and feel in coma ;) and the last mention of years were 7 years of not seeing each other, if I'm not wrong ^^'
just check that out... anyways I love the story tho!!
izy_angelic
#6
Chapter 10: Let me have a moment. Don't touch me. I am very emotional right now.
?
izy_angelic
#7
Chapter 7: Crying a river.
izy_angelic
#8
Chapter 5: Danggit. That's hurt
aliasfeea #9
Chapter 10: Huuuu its beautiful endinggg ❤❤ love it sooo muchhh