“I’m trying to decide whether to get a cat or a dog.”

Side by side, Kyungsoo and I walk around a peaceful area of the town. We just left a traditional ramen house and so we’re still in the area and it feels good to chat since it’s quiet. “If I were you, what pet would you get?” I ask and turn to him. “I always wanted to get a turtle.” He answers and my jaw just dropped trying to process what he just said. “Why the hell would you want a turtle?” I ask and fold my arms.

“They’re one of the oldest reptiles inhabiting the earth.” He answers. “And so?” I ask back and looked at him mockingly. Ever since we’ve decided to resume our “paradigm” or whatever he calls it, we’ve been trying to know each other gradually through chatting. “But of the three-hundred-twenty-seven species known of its kind, some are highly endangered already. I always wished I could keep at least two of those and multiply them again.” He explains.

Although I didn’t understand a thing about what he’s trying to come to, I realize the sincerety and generosity of his reasons.

“Oh oh~ and then build a zoo!” I suggest excitedly while hopping and he just looked at me like I just said the stupidest thing on earth. “What? What’s wrong with that? You can even make money. You’re smart enough to do that~” I said and slapped him on the arm. He looked at me in bewilderment and covered his arm. “If I will grow them, I would choose to bring them back to their right habitat once they’re plenty enough.” He argues.

“And then what? Get hunted again?” I scoff. “Oh goodness, why am I even affected. You are making me sick these days.” I add and roll my eyes. “Have you checked your temperature? I have a digital thermometer here.” He says and I just gave him a face. “I mean the rhetorical one, okay? Chill them horses.” I said as a matter of fact and scrunch my nose. “I don’t own any horses. It’s expensive. But when I was a kid, I always wanted to own one and then clone it so I have two or more and it saves money but then cloning alone is also expensive so I just brushed the thought off. I still regret it.” He answers.

“Oh my goodness, Okay. Stop. I didn’t say anything.” I said and put my hands up in surrender. He gave me a nod and a light smile which calmed me down again. He never really gave me a wide smile or a laugh but his small smiles were still enough to give me chills every time.

It’s weird that I’m slowly accepting his weirdness.

Weird right? How many times did I just say that word. . .

Not enough to describe a Do Kyungsoo.

“Alright, I have a question.” I said and made a tiny hop as we go down, the street was a bit slanted that’s why. “Alright, ask over.” He said. “What did your mother do to make you THAT smart?” I ask. “It’s a little bit personal and sensitive and I have never talked about it with a female before.” He said and I just nodded. “It’s alright, I’ll listen and understand it.” I said. “Alright.” He fixed his suit for a while and clear his throat. “She gave birth to me. Caesarian section.” He tells and my face fell.

“You serious?” I ask, my eyelid dropping out of disappointment. “Yes, I am. Have you seen a female giving birth? I haven’t. It’s a sensitive topic.” He says. “Yeah right. You talk about brains while I eat sashimi and giving birth is a sensitive topic. Wow.” I said sarcastically. “I did not tell you to go on to eating Sashimi while I explain the lesions on the prefrontal cortex I found in one research.” He argues back.

“Yeah, but you didn’t stop me nor warn me.” I said. “That was three days ago.” He says and for a while, I was a bit taken aback. “Oh??~ Look who’s changing the topic now??” I ask in so much amusement. He just gave me that sullen look before turning straight ahead again. “Kyungsoo.” I stop laughing and peek at his face. “Yes.” He responds. “When you get married. . . and then your wife gives birth. You’ll be with her the whole time, right?” I ask.

I blush a bit because of my own question, I don’t even know why.

“I’m not that kind of doctor.” He said and I frown. “Yah, that’s not what I meant.” I said and hit his arm again. He gave me another shocked glare. He hates being hit. “If there is no enough nurses and doctors to assist her. If there is, I don’t need to be there right?” He asks. I got bugged off by what he said but then I realize it was Do Kyungsoo, it’s not that he won’t care about his wife, he just doesn’t know how. “Alright, listen to me you dimwit.” I said and moved closer to his side but we continued walking. “I’m not a dimwit.” He said. “Alright alright, whatever. But listen to me. . .” I gaze at him.

“When you fall in love, you will take back what you said and would want to be there for your future wife when she gives birth.” I said. “Would you want me to be there when you give birth?” He asks and I suddenly choked on my own when I heard it. I stopped walking and coughed so much out of shock. “Are you alright? Raise your arms.” He said. “What—“ I cough again, I couldn’t finish my words. I was too shocked of what he said. “I said raise your arms. It expands the ribs and opens your lungs, quickly.” He said and grabbed my wrists and raised my arms himself.

Slowly but surely, I calmed down.

When I was completely fine, I stood straight again and shot a glare at him. “Why’d you say that??” I exclaim making him flinch. “Why, do we talk about this when you’re already on labor? There won’t be enough time, you’re in too much pain to tell me if you want me there or not.” He explains and I felt weak on my knees. I cover my face with both of my hands and try to suppress the urge to scream out of bewilderment of this man.

He’s neither aggressive nor innocent.

I don’t know!

“Do Kyungsoo.” I call and look up to him again showing my heated face. I know it’s probably red, I myself could feel it. “We’re still friends right now.” I said. “Yes, I am aware of that.” He said and nodded. “Then why the hell are you expecting my birth right away??” I yell and he backed away in shock. “I am not expecting anything. I am just being prepared.” He explains. “I know. But I’m not your wife!” I answer back while pulling my hair in frustration.

“But you want to be.” He says. “Ye—what??” I ask in shock but he continued walking again and I trail behind.  “Don’t we have a mutual interest?” He asks which made me purse my lips together.

He’s killing me.

He’s succeeding.

I try to speak again but nothing came out. “I shall not mention it again.” He said and I sigh in relief. “Oh, thank God.” I said. “But please be reminded of telling me before your labor when it happ—“Kyungsoo!” I cut him off and so he literally stopped this time, tightening his lips together with the tip of his tongue stuck out on the middle. He looks so adorable right now although I wanted to strangle him earlier.

“I have never been cut off this much before. It’s a new experience since we got acquainted.” He said while shaking his head. He gazed at me while rubbing the back of his neck. He looked very confused yet amused at the same time. This time, I can’t help but to smile. “Sometimes when you do it. . . I want to leave because I’m not used to it.” He said. “Then why don’t you leave?” I ask while chuckling.

“I don’t leave because I should get used to it.” He answers. I look away with a sheepish smile but I try to suppress it by closing my mouth tightly and scratching the tip of my nose. “All my life, I have always been uncomfortable with gestures and human contacts that others are comfortable of doing. For me, it’s a matter of hard work to achieve that and since we’ve become friends, it’s a progress.” He explained.

“May I ask why. . . do you think you are like that?” I hesitantly ask, I know he might just answer me with something I wouldn’t be satisfied of but I just brush the thought of and let him be slowly open when he can. “When I was a kid, I was believed to have this condition where a kid has difficulties in social interaction and non-verbal communication including repetitive patterns of behaviors and interests.” He explains.

“O-okay. . . would you mind explaining it a bit simpler for me? Since I’m not that smart, you know. . .” I said and laughed a bit. “Ever since I was a kid, I had a hard time talking to people or even comprehending their feelings. And the other one is the repetitive patterns. For example, if I get used to staying in a particular place in the house, that is my spot. I’m always there and I don’t like any other person taking it.” He explains.

My jaw dropped.

“Or. . . another example, if I’m used to eating a banana, half bowl of cereal and a glass of milk every morning, that can’t change. If I don’t do that or a little change happens, I feel distressed the whole day.” He tells. He looks down the ground and had a light smile. I’m supposed to be crept out but I am not. He looks rather. . . concerned of his own problem like he didn’t want it too. Well, who would. “Are you still. . . like that today?” I ask.

He turns to me. “Are you scared?” He asks back. He looks curious of what I am going to answer. “Why would I be? You’re not crazy.” I answer and chuckle. His eyes stayed on mine for a little while before he looked away. “Maybe it’s just like me. . . If I don’t have my favorite Hello Kitty pillow at night, I wouldn’t be able to sleep. I think all kinds of people have that.” I said to comfort him.

Somehow, I felt my heart pound when he finally opened up something about himself.

“I’m quite surprised that you didn’t run away yet.” He said. “Psh, that’s bull. Besides, aren’t you trying to improve yourself even just a bit? That’s why you’re friends with me now and also, even if you can’t change it completely, I don’t have the right to complain. It’s you.” I said. “I know. You really can’t complain, it’s good that we’re clear.” He said. I roll my eyes but I was chuckling. “Thank you?~” I mock, he didn’t even thanked me.

“You’re welcome.” He said. He’s lucky I know now why he’s a bit insensitive, it’s not his fault nor he likes it. And I could see he’s trying to change himself and I feel proud of him, somehow. “We’re here.” He says interrupting my thoughts. “Huh? Your car is still far aw—“I turn to my left and saw a pet shop. I didn’t even realize he led me here. “Oh my god~ There are puppies and cats inside!” I jump out of excitement when I look from the glass door. “Let’s go~” I said and grabbed his wrist but then he didn’t move.

“Hey, let’s go?” I turn to him. He had an anxious face. “You go choose, I shall wait here.” He said. I gave him a knowing look and sighed. “Are you scared?” I ask. He looked around while putting his hands inside his pockets. I’m confused of why he would be scared because there’s a few animals in his lab, hamsters, rabbits, lizards and other animals he use for researches. So it’s impossible. “I told you so much already. You’re getting too much.” He muffles in a whiny way.

“Wait, why? Just tell me or I won’t enter.” I said and folded my arms. Our eyes met again and he heaves a sigh. “I just don’t like the furs touching my skin or nose especially when they shed. And I didn't bring my gloves, I always wear it when I'm in the lab.” He said and it was obvious he was observing my reaction. “Then. . . I should get a pet either a dog or a cat which doesn’t shed so much. Wait here.” I said and gave him a smile before skipping to the door. I turn to him one last time he was staring at me like he was surprised of my decision.

“Ooh~ your stomach lining’s turning red.” I tease and wiggled my eyebrows. He had a much more bewildered expression and he looked around seemingly wanting to run away and hide but he isn’t moving. “What?” I mocked. “You can’t even explain it, you’re a Muggle.” He suddenly argues but his face was turning much redder. “Ooh~ Whatever you said, I love it better than Jellyfish. But I'll ask you what that means later.” I gave him a simple wink before completely entering the shop.

I’m starting to like him.. 

Oh my god, I just said I--breathe, Han Iseul. Breathe. . . , I want burger. 

A/N: The RomCom Feels this story gives me is leaving me breathless.

But finally, Kyungsoo said something personal. ROFL -- well aside from his mother's birth. xD