(So this is based of the manga Doukyuusei, which I recommend to anyone interested. Enjoy!)

Around the time when leaves began transforming into shades of brown and red was the time of the fall showcase. The all-boys school that never stuck out gathered each class every year into a cramped auditorium where they would all separately prepare a song they learned. The singing was often atonal and dissonant, but that never stopped the teachers from upholding the tradition.

“We’ll be singing about youthful love.” Groans commenced as the homeroom teacher began taping music onto the blackboard. “Complain all you want; I feel that same as you. Who wants to listen to a bunch of tone deaf teenagers for an hour? Definitely not me, but my hands are tied.”

Namjoon stood up, taking his place in the second row and scanning his eyes over the simple notes and words on the paper in front of him. The boys around him continued to chatter until the teacher silenced them and began conducting them for the first line.

Namjoon was never one for singing, but he could carry a tune. Music was his passion, but forced renditions of sappy ballads was not what he considered real music. Maybe on a different day he would’ve raised more complaints, maybe suggested a different song, but today it felt like to much energy to do anything more than opening his mouth and produce the notes and puddle-deep lyrics.

He looked in front of him to his one of his friends, Jeong Hoseok, singing along with a wide smile on his face. Namjoon almost snorted at how animated the boy was, but his attention was quickly drawn to something on his right. Or rather, something missing on his right. He quickly took a peak at the student next to him, noticing the movement of his mouth in time with everyone else, but with no sound coming out.

Does he think he’s too good to sing along?

Namjoon let the thought go, once again not feeling like wasting the energy on something pointless and considered through the rest of the verse.

~*~

“Hey, Rap Monster~” Hoseok called out to Namjoon, who was pulling out his bag and needed books from his locker before heading out the door. “Want a ride home?” The bright smiled boy dangled a set of keys from his hand, giving them a little shake. “I managed to get my brother to lend me his motorcycle for the day.”

Namjoon smirked, knowing the precious possession of Hoseok’s older brother. “Is he back from college already?” He stuck his hand back into the locker, digging around trying to find his lunch container.

“Hah, he quit university a week ago.” The other leaned against the lockers, shoving the keys into his pocket. “Something about wanting to pursue a culinary profession? So now he’s working at the fried chicken place three blocks over.”

Namjoon let out a chuckle, but it soon turned to a sigh as he realized that he had left his lunch box back in the classroom. “Thanks for the ride, but I’ll have to pass. Forgot something,” He pointed down the hall before patting Hoseok on the back and jogging towards their classroom.

Usually the halls were empty, maybe one or two stragglers, but no one tended to stay behind after the last bell rang to release them from their studies for the day. Usually the halls would be filled with only the distant sound of boys yelling through an opened window as they left the school yard. Today though, faint singing could be heard from behind the door in front of Namjoon. It was the same song they had sung in class, this time with awkward phrasing and misplaced pauses. Even though the song was being slightly butchered, the singer still had a nice voice and Namjoon was quickly pulling the door back to discover just who it belonged too.

Wide eyes turned to the blond rapper, the note cutting off quickly as another presence entered the room. Namjoon’s eyes met the startled ones that were surrounded by round frames and he could feel heat rushing to tint his cheeks pink. The boy from earlier sat on one of the desks, his hand holding up the sheet music. Both of them stilled, silence dropping over the room. Namjoon’s eyes slowly rolled over the other boy until it landed on the paper in his hand.

“You’re phrasing is off on the third verse.” Namjoon said for a lack of anything better, wondering why he didn’t just grab his forgotten lunch box and leave. He walked towards the other, pointing to the musical marking on the measure. “There’s a pause here for two beats, making it sound more like this.” And then he sang the verse while avoiding the framed eyes above him.

“Oh, uh,” The boy, Kim Seokjin if he remembered right, stuttered out. “Thanks.” He pushed his round glasses up further on his nose, mouthing along quickly to the verse Namjoon had just sung, trying to memorize how it should sound. “I’m not the best at reading sheet music.”

“I could help you.” The words came out before Namjoon could process them and just how weird they were. The two were classmates, but that was as far as their relationship, if it could even called that, went. But for some reason, the blond couldn’t help but extend his aide to the brown-haired boy. “With the song and stuff,” he placed his hand behind his neck, nervously flicking his eyes to nothing on the floor. “If you want.”

For a moment, Seokjin was still. His eyes were still wide, his cheeks red, and pink lips slightly parted. After a second that felt like a year, he finally relaxed. “Okay.”

So for the rest of the month before the showcase, the two met up every day after school. For the most part, they would get together in the empty classroom, but on days when other students still lingered in the academic wing or when the weather happened to be particularly nice, they would find themselves sitting behind the gym, backs against the brick wall as they repeated the simple verses. Sometimes, on days when the skies were unusually blue and the world seemed a little brighter, Namjoon would say something that caused sparkling laughter to spill out of Seokjin’s plump lips. The darker haired boy’s hand would somehow find its way to Namjoon’s thigh, which was pressed up against Seokjin’s, and for a moment it was almost like both of them could feel some sort of connection between each other. Then the moment would break as quickly as it happened, leaving both parties shy and confused if what had just transpired really happened or not.

In class, Namjoon would find his eyes travelling over to where Seokjin sat. It was unconscious, or so he told himself, and when he his heart beat sped up a bit after the other answered a question or smirked to himself about an private thought, Namjoon would push the strange feelings into the deep resources of his mind where he kept the memories of how Seokjin’s eyes crinkled when he smiled and how his lips pursed when he was thinking hard about something.

But one day, when the class had stood up in their rows to run through the song, Namjoon found his eyes travelling over to his right once more. He was met with a Seokjin’s own eyes trained towards the front, but instead of on the notes on the board, they were focused on the cheerful boy in front of Namjoon. This time his heart constricted and he flipped his head back to the front, not wanting to notice something that he shouldn’t care about.

Three weeks had gone by quickly and on the fourth week, a few days after the incident in class, Namjoon found himself seated in the grass beside Seokjin. Their thighs were pressed against each other’s like usual and their mouths were moving in sync as they ran through the piece that Seokjin had mastered after the second week.

“What do you think of Hoseok?” Namjoon let the question fall from his lips naturally, turning to look at Seokjin. The other boy’s brows lifted in surprise, but his expression stayed calm.

“I admire his ability to always seem so positive.” Seokjin stated after a thinking for a second. “He always manages to be cheerful, even when we’re forced to sing or when the teacher decides the best way to start the day is with a pop quiz.” A small smile formed on his lips as he looked down onto the paper in his hands. “I’ve always thought of myself as a negative person, but I’ve always wanted to be able to see the world as a hopeful place.”

Seokjin turned to smile at Namjoon, causing the other to release a staggered breathe at the sheer beauty of it. “You’re not a negative person.” Namjoon said in a state-of-the-fact manner. “You’re hardworking and always put so much effort into little things.” Seokjin was looking at him with wide eyes, making a similar face on the day he found him in the classroom. Namjoon leaned forward, “You always seem to make my days more like sunshine.” Then his lips were lightly pressing forward, his eyes fluttering close as his hand found perch on Seokjin’s thigh. For a moment as their mouths met, Namjoon could only think about how right this felt. How the knot that had at some point twisted in his stomach slowly became unraveled and was now replaced by butterflies. But then he remembered why the knot was there, what he’d seen in class, and the words that had just left Seokjin’s lips.

Namjoon quickly pulled away, pushing himself far from Seokjin, whose eyes were lidded, but then became wide after seeing the panic on Namjoon’s face. “I’m sorry.” Namjoon began to get up, pulling his bag along with him, trying to avoid Seokjin’s eyes. “You should find Hoseok.” Then he took off in a sprint, needing to be away from Seokjin and his very pink lips.

“Namjoon!” He didn’t stop, even as Seokjin’s steps came closer.

“I’m sorry!” Namjoon yelled

“Namjoon, stop!” A hand twisted around his wrist and soon he was falling onto the ground, a large weight sitting on his torso. “Namjoon, why are you sorry?” Seokjin was above him, panting, and his grip was still on Namjoon’s wrist.

“I think…” Namjoon took in a deep breath, staring back into Seokjin’s black eyes. His glasses were slipping down on his nose, beads of sweat touching the side of his head, and his face was pink probably both from catching up to Namjoon and from their previous activity. Namjoon could feel his own blood rushing to his face and he quickly pulled his free arm to cover his eyes. “I think I’m falling for you.”

After the first day in the classroom when Namjoon just happened to walk in on Seokjin practicing, words had been rolling off his tongue without his consent. Something about the brown haired boy had caused him to become so honest, even if all he had wanted to do was push the thoughts far into his mind. This was unrequited love right? Seokjin obviously had feelings for someone that was not Namjoon. Even as the blond male knew all that was left for him was rejection, he couldn’t help but feel the lasts of the knots completely untangle. Something about admitting the feelings put an ease over him, because now Seokjin would know and Namjoon would have no regrets.

As he continued to prepare himself from the other’s rejection, a soft hand moved to pull his arm away and expose Namjoon’s face. Seokjin was still sitting on his torso and once again his face was unreadable. His eyes were hooded and his bottom lip folded under his top row of teeth as he bit down on it, something Namjoon noticed he tended to do when he was thinking hard. Then he was moving forward, leaning closer to Namjoon, so close that the other was sure he would be able to hear his racing heart. Seokjin’s lips met Namjoon’s once again, in a soft and chaste kiss that wasn’t able to answer all of Namjoon’s questions, but somehow all the ones that mattered.

~*~

The showcase passed with as much ease as expected. Seokjin stood beside Namjoon and managed to hit the right notes in the right places and their after school singing sessions had come to an end.

Seokjin was always one to worry. Maybe that’s why he was never particularly fond of creating friendships that would only end with him feeling anxious. It was the reason he missed the train for his exams to get into his first choice high schools too, leaving him scraping at the bottom of the barrel only to come to this low ranked school. Before it had been a nuisance, he was too smart and the learning environment was too easy but also too annoying as he was constantly surrounded by other’s who didn’t take their studies seriously.

Even after feeling that way for the first year of his high school career, as he walked beside Namjoon under a shared umbrella, he both felt content and anxious about where he was in life. Something about Namjoon managed to put him at ease, maybe it was how his eyes seemed to disappear each time his smile became too big for his face, or the way his cheeks dimpled with each laugh. Namjoon was cute, had always been cute if Seokjin could remember, but it wasn’t until he’d caught him practicing in their empty classroom that he had fully registered just how good looking the boys was.

His features put him at ease, but they also put him on edge. They had kissed a few times since the day Namjoon had confessed his feelings and Seokjin had reciprocated, but nothing had really been made official. Seokjin couldn’t help but feel a little nervous. Namjoon was attractive, something that a lot of people noticed. As they walked together to Seokjin’s cram school, eyes were constantly drawn to the tall blond. All Seokjin wanted to do was wrap an arm around the other and make sure that everyone knew that he wasn’t available.

He didn’t, though, because he wasn’t even sure if he had a right to.

“You’re thinking again.” Namjoon said, his eyes forward as they both walked in the heavy rain that had started to fall as school was finishing up.

“It’s nothing.” Seokjin stated flatly, turning to look at Namjoon. He noticed then that the umbrella wasn’t completely covering his right shoulder, leaving it soaked from the rain. “It’s not far from here, I can go on my own.” Seokjin quickly put his bag over his head, pushing Namjoon’s umbrella towards its owner and began walking faster. Footsteps quickly caught up to him and he was soon shielded from the clouds again.

“I can at least walk you to the end of the street.” Namjoon kept up with his pace, leaving Seokjin with the option to give in or continue to deny the other, and there was only so much denying he was capable of when Namjoon was around. Seokjin gave up, dropping his bag to his side. “Hey,” the blond started again, his shoulder brushing against the other’s broad ones. “Can I kiss you?”

Seokjin blushed, looking up to Namjoon, but quickly averting his gaze once he saw the desire flicker in the other’s eyes. “No,” he said, refusing to look back up. It wasn’t how he really felt, because in all honesty, he had been wanting to kiss Namjoon the entire walk too. But Seokjin was feeling nervous and unsure of both himself and their relationship.

Namjoon didn’t pressure him further though, just humming a sound of acceptance and quickly moving on. “I’m performing tonight if you want to stop by after your cram school.” Namjoon turned and smiled at him. “You haven’t heard my rapping yet, right?” Seokjin shook his head. “Come tonight.”

“Okay.”

~*~

Seokjin spent his time at cram school unable to focus on his studies, but instead thinking about what it would be like to see Namjoon up on a stage, illuminated by spot lights as he spits out self-composed verses. It was something he definitely wanted to see, the cool image of the boy he liked. When the class finished up he found himself rushing out and heading to the club Namjoon had given him directions to.

“This is the entrance fee,” Seokjin quickly pulled out some bills and the woman in front of him smiled and took his hand. She stamped the back with a purple design. “This will get you in and out for the night and here’s your ticket for one free drink. Enjoy!”

Seokjin pushed through the crowd, making his way to the bar where he was quickly handed an unidentified drink and pushed to the side as more and more people crowded around. He slowly sipped the bitter liquid until music started playing and a tall figure stood on stage.

To put it simply, Namjoon was amazing. His deep voice reciting lines that were just as deep. Seokjin stood in awe, unable to really process just how amazing he looked up there with vivid emotions covering his face as he spit each verse. Seokjin’s heart beat faster as his anxious feelings rose closer to the surface as the beats slowly came to a stop and Namjoon finished, waving as the crowd cheered and clapped. He smiled, waving his hands before stepping backstage and disappearing. Seokjin pushed his way to the back where he had planned to meet Namjoon before. He finished off his drink and left the cup on a table.

“Rap Monster is so cool.” Two girls were standing outside of the room where the performers usually got ready. Seokjin stood by the corner, not heading further.

“He’s so good looking.” The girl with a short pixie cut piped in, holding a hand up to to muffle her giggles. “Since it’s the last show we’ll be able to go to for a while, you should talk to him!” The girl next to her blushed and Seokjin started to feel more worried. He shouldn’t right? He and Namjoon might not be official, but they were something, right?

“Rap Monster!” The two girls yelled out, bowing as Namjoon exited through the door they were standing in front of. “We’re your number one fans.” The girl with the pixie cut nudged her friend forward.

“Um, I was wondering if you had a girlfriend.” She asked shyly, ducking her head. Namjoon’s brows furrowed and he didn’t answer at first. The girl seemed to get more nervous as the seconds ticked by. “Then, would it be okay if we exchanged numbers?”

Seokjin’s heart stopped. Surely he would say no right? But then again, was it a big deal? He was conflicted. He didn’t want to share Namjoon’s attention, but also what right did he have to stop this transaction. And when Namjoon casually agreed, Seokjin found himself on his feet and soon out in the cold air. He kept going, not stopping to pick up his vibrating cellphone.

He wasn’t sure exactly where he had run off to, so he stopped in an empty park. The grass felt soft and Seokjin began to think that the drink he had earlier was alcoholic, because he felt a bit off, not drunk, but not sober. He let his back hit the green grass below him and he looked up into the dark sky. The area was quiet, only the almost silent swoosh of a car every now and then breaking the silence. His phone began buzzing again in his pocket.

“Hello?” He answered, his eyes not leaving the dark blue above.

“Where are you?” Namjoon’s husky voice was recognizable through the phone’s ty speakers. Seokjin described his location and soon the call was disconnected. Then a weight was on top of him after a few minutes passed, pulling him up as arms circled him. “I finally found you.”

Seokjin let himself wrap his own arms around the rapper, pulling him even closer as he tucked his head into the nook of his neck. He breathed in his scent, letting it fill his senses as he took in all that was Kim Namjoon. Being this close melted away some of Seokjin’s anxieties, but he knew they would never be put to rest if he didn’t say anything. “Why?”

Namjoon stiffened, releasing Seokjin just enough so that he could meet his eyes. “What?”

“What are we Namjoon?” Seokjin was glad for the drink, at least it helped him release some of his inhibitions. “Why are you looking for me, or looking at me at all? Why me?” Namjoon moved slightly, pulling himself off of the dark haired boy and onto the grass next to him. He tangled his fingers with Seokjin’s, laying down next to him.

“What are we?” Namjoon mused. “I don’t know what I am to you, but to me…” He turned his eyes away from the sky above and back to Seokjin’s worried face. “To me, you’re my everything.”

Seokjin felt his heart stop for a second as he processed what exactly Namjoon had just said. He pulled forward, really needing to meet Namjoon’s lips with his own in this moment. He kissed him passionately, for once no worry about what was really between them on his mind. Seokjin, who was always one to worry about the little things, avoid problems, and only focus on his studies was experiencing an emotion he couldn’t quite put his finger on. Extreme bliss, ecstasy, happiness, content—all these words applied but none of them truly fit for just how Seokjin felt for Namjoon.

“Let’s go out.” Seokjin said breathlessly, breaking their kiss. “Let’s date, be boyfriends, or whatever.” Namjoon’s eyes sparkled but were soon disappearing as his lips turned upwards into a large smile. “I need you to be mine and only mine.”

Namjoon moved his hand up to cup Seokjin’s cheek, pulling him back in quickly. Before letting their lips meet once more though, he spoke. “Yours and only yours, huh?” He whispered, his breath fanning Seokjin’s red lips. “Sounds perfect.”

Seokjin may not be able to place a name to that feeling he has every time he sees, hears, or even thinks about Namjoon. But for now that’s okay, because they’re together and that’s what he needs. Anyway, love is a hard thing to put your finger on until it’s already got you falling.

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A/N

 So, I hope you liked it. I wanted to keep it short and simple, but also play off both of their points of view... Anyway, kudos and comments are always appreciated. I'm on break right now and am hoping to finish up some more stuff while I'm not loaded with school work. I still need to read over it a few more times and edit, btw. But hey, only one more month of classes and I've survived my first year in college. :') Lets all pray that I can make it. Have a great day!