Today i wonder why i even come to school. It not like im going to need anything i learn when i go into the real world and the only thing school is acomplishing is making me pissed off. I like not doing what im told becuase it makes me feel like im not just a 'sheep' being herded into society. 

It's been 3 days 2 hours and 17 minutes since smart-kid was sat next to me and we still havent had a full conversation. I dont know his name and i dont really care to be honest because i dont care about anything anymore. im about to get up and leave this lesson when the school nurse comes in with a note. she looks me straight in the eye and walkes to the back, kneeling down by my desk and i roll my eyes, looking outside the window on the opposite side of the classroom. i dont like this woman and i already know what she is going to say. 

"Hyun Ae, your dad has called me. Do you know why?"

she touches my shoulder and that makes me angry. I turn my head around and stare at the hand thats on my arm untill she removes it. Then i look her directly in the eye and say, "why would that be?"

She seems to squirm a little and i can tell that smart-kid has his attention on us. "erm, well, he informed me that you havent been taking your meds lately. He said that he found them in your room. Is this true?", she almost looks nervous to know the answer. 

"i should have known he'd go through all my things.", i don't give her a straightforward answer but she knows. She frowns at me and shakes her head slightly, in a way that makes me want to smack her.

"Im very dissapointed in you, Hyun Ae. Come to my office at lunch, or i will come and get you to take todays meds. your dad has sent them in. You've dissapointed us both." she says and i try to keep my anger under control as she walks out of the classroom. 

I turn my head to smart-kid who is looking at me without even trying to be subtle. "what?", i snap at him, a little bit louder than i expected. 

"is there a problem at the back there?", the teacher calls out, looking at me with concern. Its only now i realise my hands are shaking.

"can i go out for a bit?" , i ask him, not wanting to loose my in the classroom. 

"alright. Hyun Woo, go with her and make sure shes okay. Heres a note for you both."

As soon as he finishes talking i get up and half storm out of the room, snatching the note as i go past him. I go out into a more empty part of the school and sit down taking some deep breaths. 

"why are you so angry?", Hyun Woo/ smart-kid asks. "what meds was the nurse talking about?"

all i can think about is blades. "none of your buisness. And i dont freaking care if she's dissapointed with me for not taking them."

his eyebrows rise as i speak.  "okay. just take deep breaths, you look like your going to kill someone."

I forget about my dad's masterpiece for a second and pull my sleeves up, taking deep breaths like he told me to. in and out. 

In.

And.

Out.

"what..what...what happened to your arms..?" , he says so softly i can barely hear him over the voices and my thoughts and the deep breaths.

I look down at my arms and smile, looking at Hyun Woo. "My dad's an artist, if you get me." i laugh. 

"What the hell!" 

I didnt expect him to get angry and i laugh even more at everything. i cant stop laughing for some reason. I can hear lots of people laughing in my head so why am i the only one laughing out loud right now? 

"whats so funny? How are you laughing? what meds was the nurse talking about. Hyun Ae!"

I take some breaths and quell my laughing. "everyone else was laughing so why shouldnt i?" ,he looks around even though there is no one else here. "I think somebody needs to take a chill pill. I have some spare" , okay, i cant help laughing at that. He still looks confused. He wants me to spell it out for him.

"My meds are for schizoaffective disorder.", i tell him, pulling down my sleeves again. i've calmed down a bit down and i sit back on the bench in the courtyard. 

"You have bipolar and schizophrenia?!"

"yup." 

He sits down next to me and we are silent for another 10 minutes before i tell him about how ive been stashing the pills and my dad and the nurse. I like him. I dont know why.

- - - - - - - - - - - -- - - - - -- - - - --

hey guys! i did a longer update this time to make up for the short one before. :) hope you liked this! very different from my other fanfic, but ive enjoyed writing it so far! Thank you to my subbies! please comment and upvote this if you like it! <3