“Hi, Mama,” Yuri said.

She sat a top the small nurse’s cot, her eyes filled with sorrow.

“Hi, baby, what happened?” Irene moved into the tiny room, discarding her purse on the floor as she crossed to Yuri.

She the back of her hair and wrapped her arms around her, needing to feel for herself that she was okay.

When she’d received the call that Yuri was in the nurse’s station at camp and she should proceed there right away, she experienced a horrible case of déjà vu.

She’d torn out of the office and raced to the campground just as she’d raced to the hospital 2 months prior.

She gripped the steering wheel in utter terror, and even though the nurse had assured her Yuri was absolutely fine, there was nothing she could do to quiet her irrational fear.

Now that she was here, she glanced expectantly at the faces of the three adults gathered in the room the nurse; Yuri’s camp counselor, Miss Taeyeon; and the camp director, Mr. Ingersol.

“Yuri had a fainting spell today,” the nurse explained calmly. “She lost consciousness for less than a minute, but given her circumstances and condition, we thought it best you came.”

“I’m fine, Mama. I feel normal, I promise. It wasn’t as bad as last time. Can I please go back to camp now?” Yuri looked up at her and the desperate hope Irene saw there tugged at her.

Mr. Ingersol cleared his throat. “Miss Taeyeon, would you take Yuri to get a refill on her juice so we can speak with her mother?”

“Of course I will. Come on, kiddo.”

Yuri shot Irene a worried glance over her shoulder as she walked quietly from the room with Miss Taeyeon.

Irene nodded in encouragement and smiled back.

Once the door closed, Irene turned to Mr. Ingersol and the nurse expectantly. “Tell me the truth. Is she okay? What exactly happened?”

“She was playing volleyball with the other kids and she just went over. Taeyeon checked in with her throughout the day, and Yuri said she felt fine. It’s a sand court, so luckily her fall was cushioned. She was out for maybe 30 seconds, and by the time I arrived on the court, she was sitting up and telling everyone not to worry. She’s a brave little girl.”

“Yes, she is,” Irene said, but only halfheartedly.

The fact that this had happened a second time in only 2 months had her shaken.

Without a reoccurrence and with Yuri’s cardiologist sounding so encouraging, it was easy to slip back into normal life.

Today was an unfortunate wake up call.

“Ms. Bae, I think this is something we need to discuss from a safety perspective,” Mr. Ingersol said.

Irene tensed, hoping against the worst.

“I have very real concerns about our ability to provide Yuri with what she needs. I hate to have to do this, but for her own benefit, I think it would be best if Yuri did not finish the summer with us.”

Irene felt as if she’d been punched squarely in the stomach. “You’re kicking her out for having a heart condition? Can you do that?”

“I’m so sorry, but it’s for her own safety. This is a very active camp, and based on what we know of Yuri’s very recent diagnosis, I’m not confident this is a safe environment for her. There are plenty of camps that cater to children with special needs. Perhaps in the future, you could look into one of them.”

“Can we come to some sort of compromise? Maybe limit her participation in the more strenuous activities. Let her watch but still get the chance to be around her friends. It would kill her to not be able to finish.”

“I’m sorry, but from a legal perspective, we can’t have her return. I had concerns when we agreed to admit her, given her recent medical history, but after consulting briefly with our attorney, this is the best course of action for everyone involved. We’ll offer a partial refund, of course, for the remaining 2 weeks.”

“Thank you,” Irene said with icy calm. “If you could just locate her backpack for me, we’ll be out of your way.”

“Of course. And again, we wish nothing but the best for Yuri.”

“Clearly.”

As they walked to the car, hand in hand, Irene struggled with how she would possibly explain to Yuri that she was no longer allowed to attend camp.

Yuri loved this place and had blossomed so much that summer with all the new activities she’d been exposed to, not to mention the new group of friends she’d made.

The idea alone broke her heart.

“Mama, why can’t I stay? I feel fine.”

“Well, because I want to make sure you’re okay. The doctor said this would happen if you overexert yourself, and so you probably need to rest a little. Lay low.”

“But this afternoon we’re supposed to do water balloons, and I don’t want to miss it. Sunny and Hyoyeon asked me to be on their team.”

“That sounds like it would have been fun, but don’t you think it’s more important to make sure you’re okay?”

Yuri thought on this for a moment. “I guess so. If that’s what you want. Maybe they’ll have water balloons tomorrow too.”

Irene took a deep breath as they climbed into the car, and then stared at the leather pattern on the steering wheel, hating what she was about to say. “Baby, I have some not so good news.”

“What?” Yuri’s puppy eyes, already filled with fear, made it even more difficult to deliver what she knew would be a horrible blow.

“We’re not coming back to camp anymore. You see, Mr. Ingersol also wants to make sure you’re feeling well, and he’s afraid that the activities at camp are not good for your heart condition.”

“He said I can’t come back?” Yuri asked in a horrified whisper.

Irene nodded solemnly. “You know what, though?” She forced herself to brighten. “I think you’re going to have more fun this way. Haraboji was just saying that he didn’t get to do enough cool stuff with you this summer. And since I still have to work in the daytime, I have a feeling you two will get into all kinds of trouble together.”

Yuri nodded almost imperceptibly and stared out the window.

“Sweetheart?” When Yuri turned back to her there were tears streaming down her face.

At the sight, Irene felt them spring into her own eyes.

“I want to go back to camp tomorrow,” she managed to gulp out. “This is all my fault.”

“Of course it’s not your fault.” Irene brushed the tears gently from her cheek. “Why would you say that?”

“Because I didn’t tell anyone I was feeling tired when I was. I just wanted to keep playing. Our team was winning the volleyball tournament, and I was going to get to serve next. I should have said something.” She managed to take a deep, shuddering breath in the midst of her sobs.

“You’re right, you should have said something. We’ve talked about this. But it’s not your fault you can’t come back to camp. It’s not your fault that your heart gets sick sometimes. It’s just the way things are, baby. But promise me you won’t keep how you’re feeling a secret ever again. This is so very important. Do you understand?”

Yuri, still crying openly, nodded. “I promise.”

Irene placed her hand gently under Yuri’s chin and turned her face fully so she could look directly into her eyes. “I love you more than the moon and back, and I know that this must be so hard for you. But things are going to get better. School’s about to start and you’re going to see all your friends again. Sooyoung didn’t get to go to summer camp at all. Think how she must feel. She’ll be so excited to see you again.”

“Yeah,” Yuri said. Her crying was now subsiding into sniffles.

“I have an idea. Why don’t we pick up a couple of double chocolate milkshakes, veg out on the couch together, and watch a movie?”

“Don’t you have to go back to work?”

“I’d rather spend today with you. You’re my favorite.”

“Okay, I guess.”

Well, that was at least something.

They could spend the afternoon together, and she could try her best to make Yuri forget about camp.

Show her a good time.

She absolutely could not stand to see her so dejected, so heartbroken.

It was tearing her up inside.

What she really wanted to do was punch that Mr. Ingersol square in the face.

When they arrived home, Irene opened the cabinet next to the television and began listing off potential movies they could watch to Yuri, who hadn’t moved very far from the entry way. “What about The Princess Diaries? You love that one.”

Yuri took a sip from her milkshake and then placed it on the end table. “I think I’d rather just go to my room for a little while.”

“You don’t want to watch a movie?”

“I don’t think so.”

“Okay, baby. Is there anything I can get you?” Irene plastered a cheerful smile on her face. “Do you want me to sit with you?”

Yuri shook her head wordlessly and headed quietly down the hall to her room.

Before she turned the corner, Irene caught a glimpse of fresh tears welling up in Yuri’s eyes.

At the sound of her bedroom door closing, Irene allowed herself to collapse onto the couch.

She covered her face with her hands and realized how completely and utterly helpless she felt.

She couldn’t overrule nature and take away Yuri’s heart block, she couldn’t protect Yuri from the harshness of the outside world, and she couldn’t even so much as cheer her up on such a difficult day.

What kind of mother was she?

She remained on the couch for the next half hour, sinking further and further into a powerless state.

She needed perspective, she realized.

She needed to talk this out.

She thought briefly of calling Tiffany, knowing she would sympathize with her from a mother’s point of view, but that wasn’t what she needed.

Irene pulled her phone from her back pocket.

Seulgi didn’t answer until the 4th ring, but when she did, just the sound of her voice was enough to calm Irene in a way she wouldn’t have thought possible.

“Hey, you.”

“Hi,” Irene answered, already finding her footing. “Are you busy?”

“That’s a relative question. Not too busy for you. What’s up? How are you?”

“Yuri and I have had a bit of a bad day. I guess I just need to talk to someone. I thought of you. Is that crazy?”

“I’d be upset if you didn’t. What happened?”

“Are you sure you have time, I mean, I can call you later if you have a lot on your plate.”

“Do you want me to come over?”

The offer alone stopped Irene short. “No, absolutely not. It’s the middle of your work day.”

“Like I said, everything is relative. Tell me what happened.”

Irene sighed and recounted the story to Seulgi, starting in May with the first diagnosis and concluding with Yuri’s seclusion in her room.

She found herself including even the small details, needing Seulgi to hear all of it.

When she finished, she felt somewhat relieved.

Seulgi didn’t answer for a moment. “Irene, I had no idea. That’s a lot for you to deal with. I mean, we sat on the back patio discussing life in detail and you never said a word.”

“I don’t think I was ready to let you that far in. You were a client and we became friends, but it’s different now. At least I think it is.”

“It is.”

“I don’t know what to do for her, Seulgi. I have a call in to her cardiologist about today, but it’s not just her health. Her spirit has really taken a hit. I’ve never seen her so desolate.”

There was a pause on the other end of the phone. “Didn’t you say she likes to swim?”

“Yeah, it’s her passion of the day.”

“Why don’t you guys come to my place in a couple of hours? I can move some things around here and meet you. Yuri can swim, I can whip us up something to eat, and we can see if we can’t get both of you in better shape.”

Irene blinked several times, considering the idea.

She could definitely use someone in her corner today, and seeing Seulgi would probably be a nice diversion for Yuri.

She’d asked about visiting Seulgi endlessly since they initially met.

“That might be nice, but I’m not sure that swimming is such a good idea. She should probably take it easy today.”

“What if there was no actual swimming? Would she go for floating around in the pool on a raft?”

“Chances are good.”

“Great. I’ll give you directions.”

“Are you sure you don’t mind because—”

“Do you have a pen?”

“Right here.”

****

“Where are we going?” Yuri sighed in annoyance.

Her mood had apparently shifted from sad to angry in the span of 2 hours.

“I thought it might be fun to get out of the house. Do you remember Seulgi from the great big house we went to?”

At the mention of Seulgi’s name, Yuri snapped to attention.

Aha, now she had her.

“Yeah, she’s the artist.”

“Right. Well, she invited us to come over for a swim at her house and then dinner afterward. I told her you’d need to take it easy in the pool, but she has some fancy rafts that might be fun to float around on. Game?”

She answered with noticeably more energy. “Game.” Yuri turned her attention back to the window but was unable to hide the small smile that crept onto her face.

Irene reached for the radio controls and turned up the volume, catching Yuri bobbing her head to the beat of the music.

It seemed this had been a good idea after all.

Irene pulled into the short driveway, parking her car behind the familiar Aston M, her signal that she had in fact located the correct house.

She leaned across the steering wheel and stared up at the two-story, medium sized home in front of her.

When Seulgi informed her that she lived on Mission Beach, it had surprised her.

All along, she’d pictured Seulgi living in more of a hoity-toity neighborhood, more akin to Banning Street, in a large formal home.

This funky beach scene, while still high end, was a much more appealing choice.

“Remember your manners today,” she instructed Yuri as they made their way from the car. “Please and thank you.”

“Thank you for reminding me,” Yuri said.

“That’s my girl.”

Seulgi opened the door just moments after the bell chimed and smiled brightly at them. “Hi, you two, come on in. Um, I can take your bag, Yuri.”

Yuri gratefully handed her backpack to Seulgi as she passed. “What have you guys been up to today?”

“Nothing until now. Can I see your pool?” Yuri asked.

“Sure, right this way.”

Irene followed Seulgi from the two-story entryway through a small hallway that opened them up into the living room.

Her eyes widened as she took in the sight before her.

The interior of the house was damn impressive.

Shiny hardwood floors, streamlined bookcases, and hip steel lighting fixtures worked together to give the place an entirely modern look and feel.

If the outside was unassuming, the inside of Seulgi’s house was downright stunning.

The entire back wall of the house was floor to ceiling windows, with the most beautiful view of the beach Irene could possibly conceive of.

The room itself was very open with a sleek little bar and 4 tall chairs separating the living room from the contemporary kitchen.

Irene didn’t see a lot of places to throw yourself down and lounge comfortably, as the light blue sculpted sectional was a far cry from the worn in, cuddly couch at her own apartment.

While it wasn’t exactly her style, she had to admit the place was breathtaking.

“How long have you lived here?” Irene asked, doing her best to mask her amazement.

“2 years. The house was built in 1983, and when I bought it I decided to upgrade a few things.”

“It’s beautiful. This view alone is…wow.”

“Thanks, I like it too. I just wish I got to enjoy it a little more. It’s nice having company though.” Seulgi must have picked up on Yuri’s puppy dog eyes as she sat patiently through their conversation. “I have a feeling that the miniature person is ready to get in the pool. Tell you what, Yuri, why don’t you go get your suit on right through there and I’ll open this place up a little bit.”

Yuri eagerly snatched the backpack from Seulgi’s hands and hurried into the bathroom pointed out to her.

Seulgi moved to a small console in the kitchen and pushed a code into the keypad.

The glass wall that separated the kitchen from the outdoors rose upward, completely opening up the room to the refreshing breeze moving in from the beach.

Irene gaped. “Okay, you just made a wall disappear. What else can you do?”

“Be patient. You never know.”

“Will there be a fireworks display later?”

Seulgi smiled wisely. “Fireworks are strictly for Tuesdays.”

“Got it. Presumptuous of me. May I ask if you plan to swim with us?”

“Mhmm. Already set. See?” Seulgi tugged a black bathing suit strap from underneath her T-shirt. “What about you? Do you need to change?”

“I do.” Irene placed a hand on her bag. “Is there somewhere I can…”

“You can change in my room,” Seulgi offered. “It’s the first door on the left, at the top of the stairs.”

Irene followed the lazy spiral staircase that s its way to the second story and easily located Seulgi’s bedroom, which seemed to be one of three in the house.

The room itself wasn’t overly large, but the two glass walls looking over the expanse of the ocean made it feel so much bigger.

The elevated second story offered a more expansive view of the Pacific, and she took a moment to watch the waves roll in from as far as the eye could see.

A soft beige love seat faced out, overlooking the ocean.

Something about this room seemed a little bit more personable, warm.

Irene imagined Seulgi cuddled up on the small sofa, reading a book, and watching the surf.

Shaking herself from the coziness of her daydream, she undressed and put on her red one piece and surveyed herself in the mirror of the master bathroom.

Somehow in these new surroundings, her bathing suit seemed to pale in comparison.

So plain.

And there it was again.

That sinking feeling of doubt.

She decided to shake it off.

Because, you know what? She wasn’t in the 4th grade anymore, struggling to measure up.

She was an accomplished single mother who had every reason to hold her head high.

At least, that’s what she would keep telling herself.

The living room was seemingly empty when she returned so Irene drifted into the kitchen, pulled along by the wafting aroma of something surely sent from baby Jesus.

She peeked in the small oven window and watered at the sight of bubbling lasagna.

Unable to stop herself, she opened the heavy oven door so she could fully appreciate the amazingness of what was before her.

“Freeze, grifter. Back away from the lasagna.”

Irene smiled, stood upright at the sound of Seulgi’s voice, and turned around innocently to plead her case.

However, what she found herself faced with was enough to make water a second time.

Seulgi was standing just beyond the interior of the house clad in a black bikini that complimented her toned physique and, well, curves to complete perfection.

She’d taken her blond hair out of the ponytail she’d been wearing earlier and it fell haphazardly around her shoulders.

Her slightly tan shoulders.

Irene tried to swallow and recapture the witty comeback that had been on the tip of her tongue just a moment before, but her brain wasn’t exactly cooperating at the moment.

“What is it?” Seulgi looked at her with concern.

When Irene’s only answer was a guilty smile and a sheepish shrug, Seulgi’s expression took on understanding.

There was a liquid heat to the gaze they now exchanged, and even though Seulgi was 15 feet away, she affected her all over.

Immediate warmth started in her stomach and moved rapidly downward.

Intensely, achingly so.

“For another time,” Irene offered quietly and inclined her head in Yuri’s direction.

Seulgi took a deep breath, blinked several times, and nodded finally as if coming to. “Follow me. Yuri is waiting for us.”

The pool was grotto style and formed a languid, wandering shape capped off with a small waterfall, originating from a grouping of large boulder styled rocks.

Just beyond the pool was a half wall that separated the deck from the beach itself.

Yuri sat at the edge of the pool, allowing her feet to dangle.

Though she’d taken swimming lessons, she’d been taught at an early age to never enter the water unless an adult was present, and Irene was grateful that she’d always been one to listen.

There were two rafts already floating in the pool and a pitcher of lemonade sat enticingly on a small table on the deck.

“Can you believe she lives right next to the beach, Mama? I mean you just step over this little brick wall and you’re there, like shazam.”

Seulgi laughed at the description. “That’s what I say when I climb over too. Shazam.”

“She’s pretty lucky, huh?” Irene said. “It was nice of Seulgi to invite us over. Did you happen to remember to say thank you?”

“Not yet. Thank you, Seulgi. I like your house a lot. It’s pretty cool.”

“You’re welcome and that’s nice of you to say. Cool is absolutely what I was going for. Ready to get in?”

“Definitely.”

“Okay, it may be a little cold at first, but I turned the heater on a tad so it should get more comfortable in about 10 minutes.”

Yuri eagerly made her way down the stairs into the 4 feet of water and Seulgi slipped in after her, showing her how the raft worked and all the little features it had attached to it, like a built in radio.

Irene could tell that Seulgi was a tad nervous around Yuri, but she hid it well.

She appreciated the effort Seulgi was making and enjoyed watching them interact.

Once they settled on a station, Seulgi took it upon herself to move Yuri and the raft around the pool, chatting with her the whole time about the fun she’d had at camp, the start of school in just 2 weeks, and of course how she’d put Seulgi’s art tips to use as of late.

With Yuri taking the reins and dominating most of the conversation, Seulgi seemed to relax.

Throughout her playful conversation with Yuri, Seulgi kept one eye on Irene.

She couldn’t help it.

Never in her life could she imagine a one piece bathing suit could be so alluring.

Perhaps it was the fact that the suit only offered a glimpse of the body underneath that so mercilessly, but the visual was quite simply doing her in.

She and Yuri chatted for a good part of a half hour, while Irene listened from the far end of the pool, chiming in occasionally.

When she did, this generally prompted an embarrassed glance from Yuri, which amused Seulgi.

The dynamic between Irene and Yuri was so informal, so everyday, it was intriguing.

So different from what she was used to.

But in a surprise turn of events, Seulgi was having fun, more fun than she thought possible with an 7 year old.

Who knew they could be this smart or this funny?

Maybe kids didn’t deserve the hard rap she’d given them all these years, or then again, maybe it was just Yuri. “So what should we do now, kiddo?”

“Ever played 20 questions?”

“Are you kidding? I’m like the Jedi of 20 questions. Am I guessing or are you?”

Yuri thought for a minute. “You.”

17 questions later, and Seulgi was finding her stride. “So the individual in question is a living female government official over the age of 50. Hmmm. Is she a congresswoman?”

“No, 2 questions left.”