Her common sense was right. While Haesoo ran, the court was being used by a 5 boys, one of them being Jisoo. As he figured that Haesoo had bailed, he called out 4 of his friends to play with him since the court was free. They came almost immediately and they’d been at it since 6.30pm.

Jisoo was head on with Joohyuk, trying to grab the ball from Joohyuk. But, the latter guarded his dribble well, smirking at Jisoo who didn’t find an opportunity to as much as reach out for the ball. Joohyuk took a right and dribbled across the court. When Seungho ran up to him as defense, Joohyuk took the shot from his spot. Fail.

The ball hit the board hard, bounced out of the court and onto the grass.

The ball rolled all the way and finally stopped at a pair of Jordan’s. Jisoo who was running to get the ball traced the feet up to the owner’s face. It was none other than Kim Haesoo.

“Did you just start without me?” she joked.

Jisoo made a face as he went up to her to take the ball. He didn’t say anything and his lack of words struck a chord within Haesoo, leading her to think that perhaps he WAS angry that she forgot about the meeting.

Haesoo grabbed the ball and held it behind her. “Yah. You mad?”

Jisoo shot her a smirk. “If I am?”

The girl squinted her eyes at him, before shrugging. “Guess not.”

At that moment, she took off towards the court’s bench and dumped her bags there. She quickly gathered that the two tallest guys were on the same team and threw the ball at the one in a white v-neck, declaring that she was joining the duo.

The game ensued 3-on-3 with the highlights being Haesoo and Jisoo basically teasing each other with the ball and going all out to score for their teams. The rivals spared no chance for each other. But, the winners were Haesoo and the two tall guys, mainly because the tall guys easily shot and scored while Haesoo was quick with defense and support.

Soon, the clock struck 9pm and the 6 sat together with a can of Sprite each. The two good friends watched, in silence, the 4 males joke and laugh with each other.

Haesoo opened her can of Sprite and gulped down the liquid until her thirst was fully quenched. “Ahhhhh, nice. I’m so thirsty, oh my god.”

She watched as one of the guys got thudded in the head when he lost in a round of Cham Cham Cham.

Giggling, she turned to Jisoo. “Who are these guys?”

Jisoo studied the 4 weirdos. “People I know from somewhere.”

“What are their names?” she asked, particularly eyeing the one who looked like a replica of Song Joongki.

Jisoo raised an eyebrow at the girl. “Don’t tell me you like them.”

He casually sipped his Sprite and fixed his shoelaces.

Hearing his comment, Haesoo quickly jumped to deny. “Eyyyy. I was just curious. Well… they’re pretty good… almost like pros.”

Jisoo smirked. “Of course they are. They’re Whimoon boys.”

Haesoo’s eyes and lips rounded upon hearing Jisoo.

She whispered excitedly to him. “Oh my God. Are you serious right now?”

The boy smiled seeing his friend’s excitement. He nodded to confirm.

Haesoo, still fascinated, tapped the shoulder of one of the tall guys and waved and smiled as if it wasn’t a tad bit weird at all. The boy, however, only laughed and turned back to his friends, not that affected by the odd action.

The girl excitedly slapped Jisoo’s arm and drank her Sprite again.

Jisoo squinted his eyes at her. “Your mood seems better. But, is there something you want to say?”

Haesoo gave it a thought. Nothing came to mind. And then she remembered her being more than an hour late. She laughed nervously. Was Jisoo going to be petty about it? He hardly ever was, after all. This was just odd.

But she entertained him, giggling nervously. “Yeah… I had something going on. And quite honestly, I forgot while I was doing that… thingy.”

Her thoughts were revisited by the events that day. She still wasn’t processing the fact that she’d just auditioned herself into YG. The results weren’t out, but if it was a pass, she wouldn’t know what to do. On one hand, she did want to be with Chanwoo, but on the other hand, that was a huge life-changing decision to take after all – dedicating her youth to practicing for a dream she didn’t think she’d pursue, to be an idol. It was all still surreal.

Jisoo eyed her suspiciously. “What ‘thingy’?”

Haesoo scratched her head. “Ahaha… you see-” RIIIIING.

Saved by the ringing phone.

“Hold that thought,” she waved her index finger and answered the call from her mother.

“Where are you?” the 46-year-old asked over the phone.

Haesoo looked at Jisoo as she answered. “I’m playing basketball. What’s up?”

“Aren’t you coming home soon?”

“Huh? Go home? I’m not done yet, though.”

“Hurry home. I brought home a lot of food from the meeting and I need someone to finish it so it doesn’t go to waste.”

“Again!? Stop bringing home so much food! They all go bad before we can finish them anyway.”

“Anyway, hurry home and have dinner with me.”

Haesoo then thought for a while. “Is there really a lot of food?”

“Yes. It could feed a family of 7.”

Haesoo found herself smirking. Perfect.

“Hold on, eomma.”

Holding her phone away and with an excited smile, she turned to the other 4 guys. “Guys! Are you hungry?”

Jisoo quickly slapped her arm. He hadn’t want to spend quality time with the boys, only interested in keeping their interaction within the court. But the 4 nodded vigorously at the mention of food.

Haesoo slapped him back and warned him to keep his mouth shut before returning to the call. “Yeah, so I’ll be bringing home some friends to finish the food. Give us half an hour, okay?”

*******

Three pair of eyes studied the 4 boys’ gluttonous pig-out. The food was clearing up 10 times faster than how it usually would when it was just Haesoo and her mother. And this was so even when Jisoo, Haesoo and her mother had barely touched their portions.

One of them who Haesoo already knew was Hyunwoo looked up at the stunned trio, smiling.

On their way back to Haesoo’s home, she had learned their names – Lee Hyunwoo, Yoo Seungho, Nam Joohyuk and Kim Minjae.

Haesoo smiled back, laughing nervously. “Haha… Eat a lot.”

When the boy returned to his food, Haesoo turned to her mother in panic. “Do we have anymore rice?”

Her mother shook her head, equally panicked.

Meanwhile, Jisoo’s bored expression never changed. He looked over at the mother and daughter before smirking at Haesoo.

“I told you so~” he cooed, taking a bite.

*******

The meal finally ended and the two close friends waved at the boys who were on their way out. The boys sure had a big appetite but that wasn’t a problem for Haesoo and her mother who wanted the food to be finished anyway. It did, however, stun them a tad bit. They were good guests, too, and filled the house with laughter and smiles that night.

“Shouldn’t you go home too?” she asked Jisoo as they stared at the retreating figures in the light of the night.

Jisoo shook his head. “I can go home a little later.”

Once the boys had disappeared down the road, Haesoo smiled.

“How do you even make friends with such… funny and happy guys like them…” she paused and stared Jisoo down. “When you’re so… dark and angry. I don’t get it.”

Jisoo rolled his eyes and pushed her head backwards with his index finger.

As the girl rubbed over the spot he had poked, Jisoo took the silence as an opportunity to ask the burning question.

“Where were you this afternoon?”

Haesoo paused and blinked a few times. And then she cheekily smiled at him. When Jisoo’s face remained blank, she cleared , reverting to her normal face and ready to spill the beans.

The truth was, the audition would either seem like a good idea, or a total mistake to Jisoo. The guy was wise and there was a huge chance Jisoo would quickly realise the reality of Haesoo actually auditioning for YG – that being for Chanwoo. But, on the other hand, Jisoo wasn’t one who would be too petty about it, leaving decisions for the individual to make. Yet, this wasn’t so much a confirmed fact, given how he wasn’t even letting go how Haesoo showed up late.

“Alright. You see… before I tell you what ‘thingy’ I was up to this afternoon… can I just confirm something?” Haesoo looked to Jisoo.

The male nodded, quite curious about what Haesoo had to say. So far, he had no clue what Haesoo had been up to.

“Okay. So, I just want to know… if… we’re like… friends friends. As in, are we like legit friends that if I… I don’t know, DISAPPEAR? If I disappear, having to go somewhere and not being able to come to school… you’d feel like . Am I that kind of friend?”

Jisoo’s eyebrows had been furrowed from the first sentence Haesoo had uttered. The way she had phrased it all had been just odd, but he knew Haesoo had been struggling to say. Focused on getting the truth out of her, he entertained her and nodded, shrugging slightly as he felt awkward having to acknowledge her as THAT kind of friend for the first time. It had always been a rivalrous kind of relationship, never deep. The deep stuff went on between her and Chanwoo instead, the boy he knew of but never got close to.

But this felt deep.

“Right. So, I’m that kind of friend. So… I have to tell you minute details like when I’m going to make like, a big decision. We’re close enough for that. Not like best best friends or the bestestte bestestes bestee best bes bes friedded friendededed kind of friend, but we’re close and I have to tell you important things,” Haesoo reiterated.

Jisoo rolled his eyes and nodded again.

“Okay!” she took a deep breath. “So! I… this afternoon… well… auditioned… at YG Enter…”

Hearing this, Jisoo’s blank expression had disappeared, replaced by a shock. His eyes had rounded and were in the biggest size than they ever have been. He took a quick look around the house. But there was nobody. The two were the only ones in front of the house facing rows and rows of homes with their lights already out for the night.

“Tell me you’re joking,” he shook her by her shoulders.

Haesoo regrettably shook her head no. The reality of the events that day was questionable. But, it did happen and she knew it did. It wasn’t her imagining things. It really happened.

“Are you crazy? Why would you sign up for an idol life? That’s just crazy!” he said, his forehead clearly depicting the stress he was facing.

It didn’t make sense. Haesoo was girl who loved school, played around with friends and went crazy with sports. What she wasn’t was a music lover. Her passion was basketball, he knew, not singing or dancing. His last thought of her would be that she loved being Big Bang more than listening to them.

“It’s not THAT bad an idea,” she shrugged.

But Jisoo didn’t want to have it. And then he realised the meaning behind her audition.

He scoffed. “It’s because of Chanwoo, isn’t it?”

He had hit the jackpot, but Haesoo, although caught red-handed, was adamant on denying.

“Nooo!!?” was all she could manage, though, her face crinkling into a derp.

Jisoo rolled his eyes, ignoring her weak attempt at lying and persisted on his hypothesis. “Yah. Being an idol is Chanwoo’s dream, not yours. I know you want to be close to him. I get that you’re best friends, but you didn’t have to overdo it. By signing up for this, you’re throwing away proper education and your youth. For what? To practice all day for a dream you know is not yours.”

Although Jisoo was wrong about the dream part since it was once actually real and rightfully Haesoo’s, for the most part, Jisoo was right. She was throwing away things for an unclear future that she wasn’t sure she wanted either. Given the circumstances, Haesoo still hated going close to musical instruments. Singing and dancing continued to make her feel vulnerable. But, her mind wasn’t registering this.

It was almost scary how she wasn’t actually bent on avoiding music at all costs given her hesitant heart. It was crazy how Chanwoo made things doable for Haesoo, even something she hated every day for the past 4 years. 4 years wasn’t enough to heal the wound. It still felt sore, but this pain easily numbed away when she remembered Chanwoo wanted this. It was more bearable.

Watching her silence, Jisoo bent down to her height, staring her in the eye.

This felt quite intimate and surprised the girl, but she didn’t look away. Jisoo didn’t usually get deep with things, but today he was, and she felt like she should listen to what he had to say.

“Listen. You know I don’t force you to do anything, just giving you an idea how to make out of situations. But this? I’m telling you now. Pull out. Whatever the result of the audition, whether you pass or fail, pull out. You don’t want that idol life. It’s tough and you have yet to wrap your mind around the kind of future you want to even have the mere want to venture on the painful journey.”

Haesoo blinked. He was right. He was making sense, as he always did, but unlike Chanwoo, just being right couldn’t convince Haesoo. The girl felt her heart move, but her brain was adamant on taking the opportunity to join YG. It was wrong, so wrong, and her brain knew it. But all the girl could think of was to just do it. The same phrase she hears every time she considered a prank on her teachers or classmates was being repeated countless times on her mind, convincing her it wasn’t such a bad idea despite the emotional repercussions.

It was okay.

When none of Jisoo’s words seemed to be able to change the silent girl’s mind, the boy decided he had to use alternative methods to convince her. These methods were more subtle and blended perfectly to appear as small talk rather than a direct question to logic.

“And to be an idol, it’s all about beauty. You need looks. Really good looks. What if they make you go under the knife for looking like that?”

This snapped Haesoo out of her silence. “Yah. You asking for death? Someone told me today I look like an idol, okay?”

Jisoo scoffed. “Are you sure?”

“YES!”

“Who?”

Haesoo paused. “Seungri.”

“Wait, Big Bang?”

“Of course~”

The boy stared at her in utter shock, his eyes rounding up to even bigger than before.

“You’re lying,” he said.

But, Haesoo shook her head with a smile, remembering the event. She had actually spoken to the famous Big Bang Seungri. It wasn’t a dream!

“How even-” “He dropped a pen and I picked it up. I was waiting for Chanwoo at that same place.”

Jisoo shook his head in disbelief. “Heol. I don’t believe it.”

“It’s true!”

“Where’s his autograph? Picture?”

And then it hit Haesoo. “Well, . I completely forgot…But! I saw G-Dragon too! And Lee Hi! They were in the hall when I entered. It was scary and I was nervous as heck. But the reaction turned out good.”

Jisoo raised an eyebrow. “What did you sing?”

“4MEN’s Baby Baby.”

He blinked. “NO. You didn’t???”

Haesoo nodded with a proud smile. She did. She really did.

“You can sing?” Jisoo raised an eyebrow, genuinely shocked.

“Ahahaha… that’s another story.

“Heol.”

There was silence for a bit as Jisoo tried to visualise how Haesoo would’ve sounded. Meanwhile, the girl re-enacted to herself in her mind how she might’ve wow-ed the judges, judging from the applause and the looks on the judges’ faces. It was heartwarming.

Then, Jisoo spoke again. “But then, the issue still prevails. You’re actually doing this for Chanwoo.”

Hearing those words being reiterated slowly again, Haesoo came to realise something.

Was it really for Chanwoo? Of course. But, how much of this dilemma was really about Chanwoo?

Haesoo once had a dream but she buried it deep and stowed the memories away when she decided one day that the dream couldn’t happen. She didn’t want it anymore because of the pain it came with. But that was then.

Now the pain was still there but so was the longing for music. She never really wanted to quit it. She just quit it when the circumstances pushed her to the decision. Back then, maybe the want was real, but thinking back, it wasn’t that real. It was anger, frustration and sadness. It was painful. If the pain had faded easily, Haesoo wouldn’t have quit music. Of course not, music was her soul. But, her soul was dark in that period, and the only thing she could do to numb the pain was if she got her revenge on her parents – by quitting what they knew made her happy.

Haesoo, the kid who grew up with a smile always on her face, then losing it when she left the musical scene – the fact itself easily depressed her parents, because they knew it was their fault.

But adult matters didn’t work like Haesoo thought it did. Her parents knew, but they didn’t do anything. Because they didn’t love each other anymore. There was no mending their broken relationship. Subsequently, Haesoo stopped loving music.

Today, Haesoo still looks back on the memories. But, setting a finger on a guitar easily made her cower in fear and tear up. The feeling wasn’t the same, as though while she’d numb herself from the pain, the pain had taken her ignorance to spread throughout her body, that any time her guard was down, it’d strike directly at the heart and let her bleed with the haunting past.

These thoughts went through Haesoo’s mind within the minutes of silence. Jisoo knew she was thinking and didn’t interrupt. He let her think things through, making sure she wasn’t jumping to conclusions and making decisions on the whim. He wasn’t one to show it, but he didn’t let his close friends ruin themselves. He thought for them more than people would think he did. His favours came in small actions, but they were important favours. This was potentially one of them.

Haesoo smiled. She shook her head.

“No. I admit, it is Chanwoo. But I want this. I want to do music again. I want to try and feel it… like how I used to. You’re right, this was about Chanwoo. But, now it’s about me,” Haesoo tried to explain, knowing Jisoo had no clue whatsoever about her association with music from the past.

As far as she remembered, Jisoo only knew that Haesoo was good at basketball, and she occasionally does well in Math and badly at everything else. Their knowledge about each other was limited to school-related things, but they both knew each other’s character like it was a formula sheet. That was what made her friendship with Jisoo different from hers with Chanwoo. With Jisoo, they based it off the notion of “chilling out”. With Chanwoo, it was more their pretty memories and unconditional love and support. It was deeper.

But this was admittedly the deepest Jisoo had been with Haesoo. It was, when it concerned the impending future, one that could either be so doomed, or so right.

“Has this got to do with your acting out when we have dance curriculum for events and Physical Education? Or when you suddenly at everything when we have to deliver a song using the clarinet during music?” the boy asked.

Haesoo blinked. “You noticed?”

Jisoo raised an eyebrow. Of course he did. The boy was silent not because nothing was going on up there in his head; he was silent because he was watching the world go by, every action at every second. Jisoo was the one the world didn’t see. Jisoo was the one who saw the world.

“Yeah… It does have to do with that. It’s this whole music thing--”

“No. It’s okay. You don’t need to tell what pains you to. I get it. This isn’t about just Chanwoo. It’s your own battle too.”

Haesoo found her lips stretching into a smile as Jisoo talked. They were friends, but she never once considered him any more than her other friends like she did Chanwoo. Listening to him now, she knew then that the boy in front of her was a friend to keep.

“Jisoo-yah~. Suddenly you look so handsome. I didn’t know you were such a sweet, understanding friend. Why do I only realise this now?” she cooed, reaching to pinch his cheek.

Her attempts were repeatedly slapped away by him as he avoided her fingers. “Stop it!!!”

But the girl only laughed, not intending to listen to him. “Have you always been this cute, Jisoo-yah~?”

The irritated look on Jisoo’s face was just golden. Rather than scare her off like it would to most students, Haesoo found it funny how his face would fold up into a very stressed face whenever she attempted things like pinching his cheek or his most-precious hair.

In the dark of the night, Haesoo had made her decision.

you know it's bad when even tons of seventeen videos cant make me smile

sigh