The thing about Lee Seokmin is that he is infuriating. The boy thinks he is the Second Coming or something. Always going off about how awesome he is. The worst part is that Soonyoung could almost see the appeal. Can sing, smart enough, not bad looking. It’s probably more of a mystery why his fans leave after three days, although Soonyoung is convinced it’s the attitude. But aren’t bad guys with haughty attitudes what’s popular on those Korean dramas and Japanese mangas these days? If you squinted Seokmin kind of looked like an actor or something.

Ah, the mysteries of the world Soonyoung will never understand. One of them is why Seungkwan was friends with Seokmin. It made it difficult to hate on him properly because there’s no one he can rant endlessly towards. Junhui and Minghao would rather stare at each other’s faces and run into the sunset (disgusting). Vernon would rather go eat with his girlfriend (gross). Mingyu and Wonwoo would rather play the will-they-won’t-they game while secretly making kissy faces at each other (unsanitary). Chan is innocent. Soonyoung isn’t that keen on traumatizing the kid.

Jeonghan? He’s always unavailable. No matter how hard Soonyoung thinks he can’t see a viable reason why he’s always occupied when he asks to go eat fast food or something.

Now that he thinks about it, what does Jeonghan do anyway? 

“And yeah. I know he’s hardworking but boy is lying if he says he’s studying everyday.”

Seungkwan furrows his brows, deep in thought. The hamburger he meant to put in his mouth remains stalled there, so Soonyoung takes the opportunity to take a bite out of it. Bacon and cheese. Nom.

“I don’t believe it but I don’t really know myself. ”

Seungkwan has this shocked and offended look. For someone who’s touted as the guru of school happenings and the go-to-guy for rumours, that he doesn’t know something is pretty shocking. Shocking enough for Soonyoung to make a dive for his chocolate milkshake. He actually makes it a quarter way through before Seungkwan swats him away.

“I’m serious. He’s never told me. This has me worried. Do you think he’s fallen into bad company? He did have this black leather jacket he likes too much. Maybe his long hair is some gang code somewhere. Or has he join the hippie movement with #YOLO as his life motto? Soonyoung, this is serious business. Stop drinking my milkshake.”

“Maybe he’s a game addict or something. Maybe he’s got a girl group addiction or something. The y groups, so he doesn’t want to show us because of his angel complex or something.”

“Oh dear. I have been a bad friend. This calls for a through, in-depth investigation. You ask Mingyu and Wonwoo. I’ll ask Seokmin.”

Soonyoung groans. These investigations never end well. But when he sees Seungkwan’s worried face, he takes out his phone to call the guys over. If it stops Seungkwan from having a panic attack, he’d do it. Even if it did mean putting with Seokmin for longer than scheduled. Seriously, everyday in class and after school is enough to make his blood pressure rise.

Seungkwan is now doing a headcount of his assembled troops. Which in reality is a ragtag team of whoever had too much free time and interested in procrastinating their mathematics assignments. Mingyu had wanted to sleep until he was told Wonwoo was going. Wonwoo wanted to eat waffles until he heard Mingy was going. Net effect, both of them actually go. See, Soonyoung wasn’t lying. That was just creative use of the most likely future reality. Or something.

Junhui and Minghao were happily eating waffles together. See, that’s why people should confess. No third party can randomly cook up lies when that happens. Vernon’s girlfriend sent Chan in his place. Seungkwan did not approve because Chan should not be exposed to devious after-school activity so early into the school year. Seokmin bluntly pointed out that Seungkwan dragged him to investigate on the second day of school. Soonyoung is probably too smug when he remembers Seungkwan had dragged him out the first.

“We’re trying to get details on Yoon Jeonghan’s after school activities. For how we’re friends and everything he’s always busy and disappearing on us. I am gravely worried he has fallen into bad company which would be just terrible!”

Soonyoung is pretty sure Seungkwan is suffering from one of his random bouts of paranoia. But he’s too nice to say it. Seokmin however is not.

“You’re just paranoid. He probably buys hair care products and buys organic salads or some crap like that.”

“What if he’s joined some gang? Extorting money? Underage drinking? Running a host club?”

“A host club makes good cash.” Mingyu says. Wonwoo whistles at that.

“What if he’s being serially ripped of by multi level marketing? One weird tip on how to make your hair flawless for 99 dollars a month?”

“You’re losing it. Get a grip on reality.”

Seungkwan hyperventilates a little but calms down at that. Huh.

“Let’s just go investigate. After that we can go grab waffles or something.”

Maybe he shouldn’t have said the waffles part. Wonwoo and Mingyu are now suddenly overenthusiatic because solve what Jeonghan does after school and get  a date!

“You know, we could just call him and ask.”

Seungkwan gives Seokmin the Death Glare. Soonyoung actually laughs.

Finding Jeonghan is strangely simple. Ask everyone if they’ve seen a handsome long-haired second year from the rock band. The girls just giggle and point. Soonyoung’s kind of suspicious because everyone seems to think that he’s in school but he doesn’t think Jeonghan as being that diligent.

This is bad stalking in the modern age with six very unsubtle guys. That’s what they have social media for right? How do fangirls do it.

They’ve been guided all the way to the sixth floor and just when Soonyoung’s about to call the directions totally flawed, Wonwoo suddenly beckons them over. So they gather outside the glass panel of the door peering in. Except it wasn’t meant for six guys to simultaneously try to peek inside. That means they accidentally push the door open and tumble in.

From his uncomfortable position sprawled on the ground with a Lee Seokmin lying on top of him, he sees Jeonghan making heart eyes at Joshua Hong from the Literature Club.

“Are you two dating???”

Ignoring his position (on top of the dog pile of boys), Seungkwan screams his question while rushing to approach Jeonghan. His fierceness is so cute. Soonyoung giggles.

“Yeah. Why did you guys barge in? Are any of you hurt?”

“Why didn’t you tell us? Why didn’t you tell meeee?”

“It isn’t a secret.”

Jeonghan looks genuinely confused. Mingyu picks Wonwoo off the floor. Chan climbs off with a groan. Seokmin presses down even harder almost as if to bully him. Soonyoung elbows him in the back.

“If the fangirls don’t know no one does, Jeonghan. Keep it that way.”

Joshua helps Soonyoung off the floor because apparently he’s a good guy like that. Huh. Soonyoung’s opinion of Joshua was a silent good boy who did his homework and spent the rest of the time reading books. Literature. Not Jeonghan’s type, but did Jeonghan even have type? An angelic girl with lovely long braided hair. That was Soonyoung’s image but looking at Joshua’s short unstyled hair he reconsiders.

“I didn’t even get to grill him.” Seungkwan is pouting now, scrutinizing Joshua. “I do think he’s a nice guy though?”

“Why is everyone dating.” Mingyu is also pouting.

“I’m single too.” Wonwoo is pouting at Mingyu. This better not be a lead up to the long-awaited confession because it’s kind of anti-climatic to do it on the floor of the Literature Club after they just pushed the door open by accident.

There’s a moment of silent where everyone, even Chan and Joshua, just stares in the will-they-won’t-they moment.

Then they burst into fits of nervous giggles and look away from each other.

“Heh I guess I’m not handsome enough.”

“Haha I won’t be a good boyfriend anyway.”

Jeonghan facepalms. Joshua shakes his head. Soonyoung likes this guy. He approves their relationship.

“Why aren’t they dating? They obviously like each other.” Chan moves towards Soonyoung and grabs his sleeve.

“You’re a good kid.” Soonyoung ruffles his hair. Chan is too cute. “They’re stupid fools. They’ll figure it out someday. Hopefully before we grow old and get white hair.”  

“Waffles sound good right now.” Mingyu says.

“Yeah, waffles sound delicious.” Wonwoo agrees and they start forcefully pushing everyone out of the Literature Room.

“They’re fools but the most foolish one is you for thinking you’ll have more fans than me after the festival.” Soonyoung didn’t notice when Seokmin got behind him and his voice against his ear makes him shudder.

“Nah, the fool is you. You always have zero after that anyway. I’ll win with just one.”

His mouth says this but in his head he’s irritated at himself. Right, before he got distracted he was thinking about going to the shed to come up with new choreography. Curse his head for going off tangent and irrational when he thinks about that punk Seokmin.

a/n: aka how everyone discovered jihan. they're all fools (except maybe seungkwan. maybe.) :>