LEE TAEMIN

September 9, 2011

It's been awhile since my Yumi had passed away. Her funeral was 5 days ago. Ever since I've been visiting her and telling her how much I missed her. It's been tough hadling my emotions and SHINee's busy schedules. I haven't really been home because of the schedules and I can't handle all the memories that come back once I step foot in there. But I'm never moving out. That's where we spent all our time when I wasn't allowed to leave. She was always home, when I go there. It seemed like she never left, but now..I see all our memories play when I stare at one spot. When I look at out couch, I see us cuddling. When I stare at the kitchen, I see us cooking. When I stare at our desk in the room, I see her studying or making the checks. When I go to the park, it reminds me of our first day. It was under the moonlight. We had a romantic picnic then we danced. I remember the first time I kissed her. Thinking about all that I hadn't realize I was crying.

Today is a special day, it's her birthday. Today was supposed to be the third year we would've celebrated her birthday together. The guys and I are going to visit her. I was dressed in jeans, a button up shirt with a tie, and converse she bought me. I met the guys outside, then we started heading there.

-AT HER SACRED ROOM- (I told them to out her in one.)

I entered first.

My eyes started getting teary, and I was sniffling.

I went up to her coffin.

"Happy Birthday Yeobo! I miss you. I hope you're celebrating your birthday! Have fun okay? I hope you're okay up there. Tell your parents, I want to meet them once I get up there. Please wait. We will be together again. Oh yeah, yeobo, our anniversary is coming up..that's on our supposed wedding day..-sigh- 20 days yeobo, until our 3 year anniversary. I really wish I could've married you..We were meant to be together. I seriously love you." I kissed her coffin.

I turned to the guys who were all crying.

"Anyone else want to say anything?" I asked.

"I do." Key-hyung said.

He walked up to her coffin.

"Yumi-ah. I miss you. You know that oppa loves you right? You were always like a little sister to me. I remember the first day I met you. Tae and I were walking around the park and we wanted to go on the swings but you were on one of them. We walked to the other and you looked up and saw us, we thought you were going to fan girl scream but instead you got up and said "You can have this one." and walked off. But Taemin grabbed onto your wrist and told you to sit down, when you did, he started pushing you. And you were scared at first but then you smiled and Taemin looked at you with his brighest smile, then I know he liked you. Yumi-ah..I can't believe your gone..It's not the same. I have no one to go shopping with. Everytime I go to the mall, I can't help but smile because I remember all those times you kept tripping and blaming Onew-hyung.-small smile- I-I miss you soo much..Happy Birthday!" he said.

"I want to say something." Minho said which surprised me because he's not so close to her.

"Happy Birthday Yumi! I miss you. I know we weren't oo close but I always kept you as a dongsaeng. I have to confessed that the first time I saw you smiling with Taemin, I felt so jealous. Taemin had a perfect angel, with him wherever he went, and ended up living with one. One day I hope to find someone just like you. You are the best! Yumi-ah..Happy Birthday. I love you dongsaeng ah." Minho-hyung said.

"Happy Birthday Yumi-ah. I love and miss you dongsaeng. Try not to have Onew Condition up there." Onew said and smiled.

"Yumi-ah. Happy Birthday! I love and miss you! Now I don't have a girl dongsaeng to help me out, with relationships. -breaks down crying- I MISS YOU DONGSAENG!!!!" Jjong-hyung said crying.

We all hugged and then left. The hyungs had a schedule while I requested today off.

I decided to take a stroll through our favorite park.

While walking, I looked everywhere, and only thought about you. Suddenly something caught my eyes, someone was walking with balloons, she...she..looked..just like you..

Is that you, yeobo?