The Frequency of the Wind

Chapter 1

                 The classrooms were already empty and the bell that signalled that school was over had already passed thirty minutes ago. Although the field was still filled with students that attends sport extracurricular, a deadly silence spread across the hall and corridor. It was the last day before weekend, so no one wanted to spend extra time inside the building anymore. They even felt that the after school club shouldn't have scheduled that day.

                  It was only for one person that he didn't want the lesson to end early, though he was happy it was finally the end of the week. The said person was now crouching ; hiding from everyone that was looking for him because he skipped the required activity he must have gone to. He hid underneath a lone tree far from the common place. He wondered how sport club was a compulsory curricular despite not everyone liking it, including him. He did like to dance, but not running around trying to catch the ball that was given to him. He prefers to relax his back here, below the tall lush tree at the backyard while writing some poems and lyrics.

                  He had dreamt to be a composer all his life, but he knew it was definitely impossible for him to do so. He was talented, yes, he acknowledge it. But he lacked of theory and tricks, supported by his current economic state, it was even worse. He couldn't even afford a laptop, how could he afford music instrument and anything else related? He wasn't from a rich family anymore. He used to, when his parents were still alive. It was five years ago, at the time of his little brother's twelfth birthday. Such a terrible memory to remain in his brain, he really wanted to erase it. One day he was eating his mother's kimchi stew for dinner, the next day he had to wear a black suit and a two-stripped armband.

                  Skimming through his lyrics, he began to sing, rather softly to prevent someone hearing his voice. A divine melody followed up as it was dispersed by the flowing wind that touched his chubby cheeks. He never felt so alive with his mild tone scattered around his ears like an angel sings to himself. He was blessed he was born endowed to have a beautiful tenor and light voice everyone could be envied. Though he was underrated or far from the word famous, he was proud of his effort to habituate a singing practice that resulted his three full octaves. It was his power after all.

                      "Oh well.. What do we have here?"

                  Jihoon was surprised when an uninvited presence came towering over him. He quickly glanced at the source of the sound and found the man he really wanted to avoid.

That sly creature Jeon Wonwoo. He seemed to bring his group of friends too.

                  Jihoon gulped a huge form of saliva and carefully put his note behind his back to hide it. He glared sharply at the raven-haired man, trying so hard not to tremble over the high tension coming out from the group.

"What do you want, Wonwoo?"

                  Wonwoo, the man that was looking at him despicably, snickered. His demanding face seemed to want something from Jihoon, or Jihoon could tell he rather wanted Jihoon to fight him back this time. Jihoon never had revenged Wonwoo all his life, despite being called lowly. He didn't really prefer to increase the problem right now, as it was already as big as hell could tell.

                "Shouldn't you know? We've been doing this since the last five months." Wonwoo's lips formed a smirk. Although girls said it was handsome and y, Jihoon always found it disgusting to see, mostly because he loathed the person who was towering above him.

             "No. How should I know?" Jihoon shifted his position to hide his note better. His back was pressing against the tree hardly that he was stuck in his current position, not bringing out the risk to be found out writing a poem. He was sure Wonwoo would rip the note apart if he discovers it.

                  He saw Wonwoo chuckles; laughing at his serious expressions like it was funny. Jihoon couldn't help but glare, feeling annoyed by the other's useless presence that wasted his precious luxury time. If only the fox-faced didn't come to interrupt his rest period, he would have finished the poem he had been working on. Or maybe finish the song lyrics he was about to arrange after he arrives home later on. It was definitely the other's purpose to disturb him. Looks like Jeon Wonwoo had developed another hobby to bother Lee Jihoon.

                  Suddenly, without any warning, Wonwoo grabbed Jihoon's collar as he lifted the shorter up until Jihoon was standing by his feet. The note that Jihoon had protected fell on the ground, obviously forgotten that the attention had turned to the two enemies. Wonwoo's friend began to cheer at Wonwoo's unexpected moves and supported him with veiling the sight of the tall teen that was about to hit Jihoon. The raven-haired tightened his grip towards the shorter and he moved his face close onto Jihoon's until their nose nearly touched.

                  Jihoon started to tremble because of shock and the rough feeling behind his back. His eyes shook by the amount of stares that intimidated him, not by instant force but by the growing tense surrounded him. Why? He was confused himself. He was used to be treated like this by Wonwoo's gang, but why did he feel enormous fear rang his heart and mind? It was the first time he felt scared. Not that he remembered since he became so immuned to this type of bullying. Was it because of the additional members of Wonwoo's kingka group or was he ffinally sick of being in this kind of situation?

                  Jihoon couldn't hear anything Wonwoo was saying, though he saw the other's mouth moved. Jihoon doubtlessly closed his eyes as he felt a pain shoot out from his cheeks. He fell to the ground hopelessly, already expecting that would come to him sooner or later. The fox-eyed teen was predictable for Jihoon to guess, but still, he couldn’t afford to deny how wrought-up he was to meet the man almost everyday, receiving punches and kicks like he was a sandbag. Pain was slowly becoming his only best friend for life. Although he was hoping to avoid the ‘best friend’ for once, but it always came to him, with Wonwoo most of the time.

                  Jihoon vacillatingly opened his eyes, gazed to the object beside him only to see someone he put on the list as the person he most hated to see.

                  Isn’t that Soonyoung walking by just now? Or maybe it was only his mere feelings? Why this agony felt so excessive for him to think anything?

                  He didn’t hope the other to help him, because he knew. The other was too disgusted by his appearance alone. Getting a crush from a guy was the last thing you want to think about as a normal person, and he understood why Soonyoung always sheer away from Jihoon after the rumors spread wide on the school ground. Soonyoung must felt the awkward feeling to meet Jihoon eyes by eyes. Seeing each other was already a rare, how come he was dreaming to have a knight in shining armor to save him?

                  He got Soonyoung’s gaze.

                  It was cold.

                  He never thought he liked a man with that sharp gaze more than anyone kinder.

                  Jihoon watched, as the latter didn’t care about the bullies that make him suffer. The other then continued to walk and leaved the scene as if nothing had happened before his eyes. Jihoon could feel his heart ached throughout his chest and he barely could hold it with kicks still followed by the first punch. He didn’t bother the gangs or Wonwoo anymore that his sore body wasn’t in his own control. He let his body to fall and received all the hates that had been thrown at him as he looked to the sky, in hope to see the heaven to greet him in vain.

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                  Jihoon came home with bruises all over his body. He didn't say anything when his brother came to him with questions written all over his face and started to panic over the wounds. The younger instantly rushed to the emergency kit he had kept just in case and approached Jihoon, worry clearly evident with his furrowed eyebrows and pouting lips. Jihoon that felt he wasn't a responsible brother as the other treated the wounds on his cheeks and neck. As the eldest, he should be the strong one instead he's giving his brother the image of a weak and a loser that he is.

                  His brother asked him so many things to fill his curiousity in which he responded with only a word or mostly four. His mood to talk was disappearing. He usually tell the younger how his day was and how the bullies were still making fun of his uality, but not this time. He felt the urge not to make his brother worry about him. It was useless anyway. His brother couldn't change his bitter and dark world. In fact, he technically dragged the other to his own nightmare that the Lee Chan that was supposed to be an excellent and charismatic student turned into the brother of a homoual.

                  He watched as Chan plastered the bruise on his hand and wondered why his brother did

everything for him without any hatred although he was the cause of all those piece of that were thrown at both of them? Everyone should have hated Jihoon, he even wanted his brother to hate him like people do. But this little kid still showed him his soft and caring smile, always cheered on him when he was feeling down. He didn't have the right to ask anything from the boy in front of him. His worn out face, his old dirty shoes and a piece of broken spectacles that had never been repaired. Chan's appearance made him felt guilty.

                  He just wanted to die from all this hell and give Chan some freedom.

                  "Alright, it's done now. You can go to rest. I'll make dinner." Chan put away the kit and walked to the kitchen, he decided to make a dinner out of their last used ingredients. He skimmed through the refrigerator carefully before turning his head at the quiet Jihoon sitting on the sofa in the living room. "Hyung? Do you prefer kimchi stew or kimchi soup with ramyun?"

                   Jihoon glanced towards the younger as he fiddled his own tie. His heart told him maybe today was the day.

                  "Your turn to choose. I've chosen yesterday's dinner." he forced a smile at Chan. Chan glanced at him expectantly, showing his usual quirky grin.

                  “Really? Are you sure you want me to choose?”

                  “Yeah, you’re actually the one that cook, right? I should give you the choice sometimes.” Hearing the other's cheery response, his heart stiffened.

                  He did have to leave this world, or Chan would suffer more.

                  Before his mind went wild, he got up from the sofa and ran to his room. Without any further hindrance, he reached out a thick string of rope and literally flashed out to the door, relieved that Chan didn't hear his steps and was too concentrated on cooking. He quickened  his steps and eventually starts running, feeling the cold wind pricked his skin. He forgot to wear his sweater, but he did care no more. He wasn't about to live in this world again tomorrow. He hoped he would not wake up again the next day after all this pain and darkness. He just want everything to end soon.

                  Jihoon stopped in his track as caught sight of sunset slipping behind the hill facing him. He was far from the town hustle; alone in the meadow surrounding his figure. Living in a town with nature still captured was the best, he thought the second the sight overwhelmed him. He approached a lone tree where he could see a low branch was hanging and he finally proceed to what he was intending to do. Climbing was an easy task for him since he was often called a monkey because of his ability to go up a tree. He tied the rope to form a circle and tightened the knot, making sure it will be able to hold him later. After a moment of staring of what he had made, he sighed in desperation.

                  He was serious to end all of this .

                  The small teen stood up, gripped the rounded rope with determination and frustration enveloped his heart. He had to believe the myth, if he wanted a better life. But his thoughts trailed to none other than his own brother. His brother would be lonely if he leave, but he had no choice. He was sure Chan would get a better life only if he was already dead. Chan would receive that eternity freedom, will not be bothered by his rumors, his bullies, his reputation, his selfishness, all of him. Chan is smart, Chan is a talented dancer, Chan is energetic and his smile can make  people happy, he deserves more love. Jihoon should bring love to Chan's life. It was his duty as an older brother.

                  Tears began to fall as Jihoon carefully placed his head in the rope; he was already prepared to jump to the ultimate darkness.  He was ready.

Goodbye Chan…

Goodbye life...

.

.

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                  "DON'T!!!"

                  A push strucked Jihoon from his minds as he fell to the ground, the rope slipping away from his neck. Landing hardly, his elbow met the soft grass with a tud, he instantly felt pain rushed in his body. He groaned, rubbing his wounded hand with an annoyed feeling. He was about to curse but was stopped by the figure that he faced. He looked up to meet a crystal black orbs staring at him with either anger or worry. He blinked when he realize the pair of eyes belonged to a man.

                  "What the are you doing?! Trying to kill yourself like that!" the man yelled at Jihoon, which Jihoon responded with a flinch. He didn't dare meet those burning eyes. Instinct  told him to avoid the man's gaze, judging by the raging aura emitting from the man. Feeling the other demanding for some answers, Jihoon gulped, trying to open his mouth although it trembled along with all of his body.

                  "It's… It's none of your business."

                  "NONE of MY business?! You think witnessing a suicide isn't considered as getting in someone's business?!" his tone harshened, this time his volume seemed to increase.

                  "You're a stranger, you don't need to know my problem." Jihoon mumbled, his hand gripping on the grass beneath him to support his weight. His nervousness started to develop into annoyance.

                  "Still, it doesn't mean you need to do something as bull as killing yourself!"

                  The other furrowed his eyebrow; his knuckle become red by . But Jihoon couldn't endure his rage. He was pissed he was being interrupted.

                  "What's your problem if I commit  suicide? You are no one to me!"

                  The man's fist tightened. "Maybe you believe that everything will be over when you commit suicide, but you are wrong! Everything will get more complicated after you die! Think about how many people will cry when they find you hanging on a tree, already blue by blood and cold by wind! Think about how many unsolved problem you have caused that you'll leave to your family! Think about your yet forgiven sins that you've made for the rest of your life! You can't just end your life just because you want to!"

                  Jihoon was at loss for words. He did not expect such a words to come from a stranger he had just met. As he began to think his unruly life, he met the reality that he still had a person waiting for him to come home. Though he was hated so much in school or every place his rumors had spread out, his brother loved him the way he was. His brother always supported him to live comfortably, despite the darkness covering the two of them. It was unbearable, almost suffocating him that he had the intention to leave his brother alone. He didn't care about his brother's feelings and fate. He was too selfish for his own good.

                  Tears slowly flowed through Jihoon's cheeks as he fell to the ground, lying desperately to overcome the pain on his chest. His body had weakened and he couldn't move a finger. His anger turned into indefinite sadness. He was broken by his own realization.

                  "I'm sorry… I'm sorry, Chan.." he sobbed repeatedly in his intermission. All he remembered in that second was Chan, his cheerful Lee Chan that would surely look for him because he escaped from home without his knowledge.

                  Seeing Jihoon's frustrated condition, the man was worried. He approached him carefully before he hugged Jihoon to comfort the crying teen, giving him an assuring pat on the back and made Jihoon sit up.  "It's okay. It'll be alright."

                  Jihoon's tears stopped as he felt warm and loving hands enveloped him. His eyes began to close, as he felt his heart drifts into tranquil state of minds.

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                  "You should go home."

                  Jihoon turned his head to the person that was sitting next to him, keeping him company despite his loneliness that still overwhelmed him. He saw the man's face who had an expression of sadness, making him feel guilty. Jihoon was the one at fault recklessly deciding to hang himself, but it looked like the man in front of him is more hurt than him. He didn't know why the man seemed in pain, though he was sure it was pretty serious. He fidgeted his fingers as he opened his mouth, about to answer the other.

                  "Should I? Even though my brother will be waiting for me, I don't have the courage to see him."

                  The man smiled weakly, his eyes locked with Jihoon's. "You are the one talking. I'm the one that more ashamed to meet my brother again."

                  Jihoon, realizing the tension and the topic becoming more sensitive, shifted his body closer to the other. He thought maybe it was the time for him to comfort the man after he saved him from his own craziness. He titled his head, staring not entirely intense though he could look pretty sympathetic and curious. "If I may know, what happened with you and your brother?"

                  "I…" Jihoon eyes widened as he saw tears formed on the man's eyes, and he tried not to panick. Jihoon was about to ask what was wrong, but the man only lifted his palm to stop Jihoon, "I abandoned my brother and made him do all the work for our family's livings."

                  The man's tears streamed slowly through his pale cheeks. Jihoon was in a mental fight not to wipe the falling drops. "I leave him alone because I'm jealous of him. I forced him to sacrifice himself for the family, get a job and do the chores. I make him think I hate him. I'm such a ing bastard to him."

                  Jihoon could tell it was difficult for the other, that he just suddenly embraced warmly the man, doing exactly the same as the man did to him before, assuring it will be alright. Jihoon felt the man's broad back trembling. He wondered how bad the situation was for the latter. His life was a mess, no parents supporting him, no friends to defend him, and lies scattered behind his name. Though, he was on his way to understand that it was the life he had to go through until the death calls. He realized how important to not be desperate cause he knew he could change his fate. Are their lives in the same boat?

                  Jihoon was about to speak when he was interrupted by the man's voice, which sounded like he's in deep pain. "Isn't it ironic? How I stop you from committing  suicide, but now I'm the one who wants to die."

                  "Don't. I believe your brother is the same as mine. He's waiting for you to come home." Jihoon responded quickly, releasing his hug to look at the man's face. Jihoon observed the huge reddened orbs, the sharp eyebrows down to the thick pair of lips, the man had stopped crying. He smiled. "You look like a big pile of poop."

                  The man smirked at Jihoon's statement before he softly punched Jihoon in his stomach. His face's colors seems to come back again. "Then yours look like a big pool of piss."

                  "What the hell? That's so gross." Jihoon chuckled, returning the punch with his smaller fist.

                  They laughed together, the feeling of loneliness instantly thrown away from their chest. It's been a while since Jihoon last laughed without any doubt stuck in his head. He remembered his last was when it was Chan's thirteenth birthday, when he gaved him a pair of shoes as a present. He worked hard as a janitor in a cafe, a shop assistant in a boutique and plenty more for it, and in two months, he could gather about forty thousand won. Chan put out some jokes related to the shoes and made Jihoon laugh. It was one of his happiest day after their parents' accident.

                  Jihoon felt a hand offered just in front of his face. He glanced at the man's figure once more. "Choi Seungcheol." he flashed the brightest grin.

                  Jihoon took the hand, emitting his brightest aura for the first time of the day. "Jihoon. Lee Jihoon."

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A/N: I'm terribly sorry for deleting the first update, because there are so many mistakes that I haven't checked earlier! Please forgive me for my clumsiness, and I promise to not do this again! DDDX