Chapter VII
What's Your Tale, Nightingale?"It is very clear and obvious to me that you're attracted to her," said Irene, nonchalantly, as she stuffed with yet another a bite of a sandwich that looked too large in her small, delicate hands.
"Please," Taeyeon said, scoffing. "Of course not," she argued back. “I'm not that vulnerable.”
The two of them had set up a meeting the previous night, agreeing to join each other for lunch during Irene's lunch break. And albeit Taeyeon knew that she had been responsible for broaching the topic and setting herself up for Irene’s prying and ivestigative intuitions, she immediately regretted having done so in the moment the younger woman started to speak.
"Oh, of course.” Irene nodded mockingly as she munched on her food. “Certainly, the fact that you secretly fantasize about her lips on yours and closely study her body with your ever-so-decent eyes does not say anything about your feelings about this girl.”
"Well, and how could you know about those things? You have never dated anybody. It still worries me how the words ‘men’ and ‘marriage' frighten you," Taeyeon tried to change the subject, no longer willing to mull over the issue like the past night. It wasn’t something that should be given attention, anyway. Not in her opinion.
Irene frowned. "They do not frighten me! I just shy away from them, and you know my reasons. Anyway, I might not have experienced these things, but I am not naive. I know how things work. And I have been friends with you for quite a while now, so I know how you work. In other words, I’m very familiar with your… debaucheries. And I can tell from a mile away that you are more interested than you should in Mr. Hwang’s heir." The brown-haired woman stopped and took another bite of her sandwich before proceeding, “Stop playing dumb in front of me. It does not suit you. You know you are just in denial, trying to act all collected and self-sufficient, but deep down, you're screaming.”
Taeyeon eyed Irene in indignation and put down the glass of water she was gulping down. A defeated sigh escaped her lips and she leaned back on the chair, looking down as her countenance was taken over by a gloomy, disheartened look. “It is easier to be in denial. I just tell myself over and over again that Tiffany has no effect upon me until I believe it. I'm just going to be hurt and frustrated I do anything different. I know this cannot be.”
"Im glad you do."
Taeyeon looked up at her friend, half-questioning, half-disheartened.
“Listen,” Irene said, putting down her food, “what happened with Bonnie was bad enough. You were lucky you managed your way out of that. Hell,” she chuckled, “you were extremely lucky. It was nearly a miracle. But this? This is ominous, Taeyeon. I'm concerned about you. If you grow closer with this girl, you might fall into something very dangerous.”
Taeyeon let out a sarcastic chuckle. “Love?”
Irene shrugged, although Taeyeon wasn't looking at her. “I don't know. What if? You may lose control. Mr. Hwang was very generous to you for doing what he did, but I don't think he would act the same way if he knew about anything inappropriate happening between you and his only daughter.” She made a small pause and observed the blonde woman in front of her, who just nodded quietly. “Don't sulk. I just worry about you. I want to knock some sense into your head.”
"I can do that myself. I know what I should and shouldn't do. I'm not reckless."
Irene curved her lips into a small smile. She knew Taeyeon was too proud to admit she needed to hear some advice to calm her down, but she also knew that her friend had taken everything in and would probably spend the remnant of the day thinking through what had been said to her. She had known Taeyeon long enough to know that, albeit a bit coarse and scarred on the outside, Taeyeon was, in reality, a very sensitive and thoughtful woman. “Right. That must have been why you hooked up with Bonnie in the office and almost got fired,” the brunette spoke, trying to create a more comfortable and playful atmosphere, willing to cheer the other woman up, even if just a bit.
Taeyeon widened her eyes in shock upon hearing the younger’s words, and responded with a swift kick on the latter’s ankle under the clothed table.
"Are you insane?" she chided the brown-haired woman, who was busy reining back a painful yelp as she massaged the recently hurt member, through gritted teeth. "Don't ever say that in public again! What if someone heard you?" she said, looking around.
"Gracious! I'm sorry. I was just joking," Irene apologized, with so painful an expression that she almost made Taeyeon feel sorry for her action, but the blonde had been so often and easily fooled by Irene's dramatic behavior before that she knew better than to fall for a pitiful face now. "Anyway, about that... Have you talked to Mr. Hwang yet?"
"No." Taeyeon frowned. "I don't know his whereabouts. He told Tiffany he'd write, but no letter has arrived so far. I will write him as soon as I know where he is."
"Good. He can't just break your agreement and leave it like that."
Taeyeon scoffed. "Our agreement. So much for that. I think it would've been better if I had just let it go. I should've quitted. I ended up without my job, anyway. Had I quitted when I had the opportunity to, I wouldn't be going through this now. I would be jobless, but at least I wouldn’t be married to someone I don’t even really know." She paused for a little while, and then continued her speech as more of a musing spoken out loud than as a direct conversation, “I could drop out of this. I could simply request the marriage be annulled. I still haven’t exactly understood why he wants me. He says it's because a man like him can't be fully respected in a society such as the one he is part of is he doesn't have a good wife by his side to present people at events,” she finished, in a mocking tone.
Irene pondered for a minute. “I agree that he made a mistake, but I don’t think you should give up on this. At least, not for now”
“Why not?”
“Well...” Irene pursed her lips together. “It has its bright sides. You see, your reputation is clean and secured, you are married to a wealthy man, you have a comfortable life--”
“If by comfortable you mean utterly boring, then I’m willing to agree with you,” Taeyeon mocked, rolling her eyes. “And as if being married to a man, wealthy or not, would satisfy me.”
Irene crossed her arms, leaning on the small table. Her patience with the woman sitting across her was started to wear thin. “All right. I won't even bother to finish. Suit yourself, Taeyeon. Why don’t you go home and tell Tiffany and whoever else you are familiar with in that house that you’ll be leaving by the time you get in touch Mr. Hwang?”
“W-what?” Taeyeon stammered. “I can’t do that.”
“Why can’t you? Don’t you want out?”
“You know I do!”
“Then what is stopping you, Taeyeon? I mean, I understand your agreeing with this. You had no other option to save yourself from a terrible demise. But I really don’t understand your appeasing to this life if you apparently loathe it so badly. So, again: what is stopping you?”
Irene’s straightforward words were like knives cutting through Taeyeon’s imaginary exterior armor. The blonde was accustomed to beating around the bush with her words, especially when it came to topics she didn’t want to discuss or on which her stance was unsure, but it was hard for her to cope when people pinned her against a wall and demanded a point-blank answer like Irene was doing. Taeyeon felt like a criminal being interrogated, and Irene’s words overwhelmed her; and worse: she was starting to feel guilty. Of what, on the other hand, she had yet to fathom, but the heat Irene was putting on her did not allow her to think straight.
“Nothing is stopping me!” Taeyeon fired back cautiously, lest someone hear her.
“Are you sure? Because I think there is something stopping you. And I also believe this thing happens to be a pretty young woman, with a sweet pair of chocolate brown eyes and very gentle a voice,” Irene taunted further, raising a brow.
Taeyeon only sighed and looked away.
“Bingo?”
“No,” Taeyeon responded, rather harshly, before eyeing the woman in front of her once again. “And weren’t you opposed to my getting close with Tiffany?”
“Most definitely. But that doesn’t mean I’m supposed to ignore the fact that she’s keeping you there.”
“Why would her?” Taeyeon responded annoyedly, hissing in a low tone as she looked around to make sure nobody would listen. “She is beautiful, but so are many other women in this world. Why do you think the… feelings I have for her would be enough to make me stay? There's plenty of other fish in the sea. And I am not desperate. Or insane. I would not do that, Irene."
“But do you see any other explanation?” Irene inquired further, crossing her arms on the table and leaning forward. “Because I don't. But you have a point. If all you care about are her good looks, that is supposed to mean you wouldn't care to leave her behind. But you do care, don't you? Why?”
“You-- Ugh!” Taeyeon groaned. “I could throttle you right now. You are making a mess of my mind!” Taeyeon protested and, with that, held her scalp with both of her hands and shut her eyes tight. “Be quiet for once. You talk so much.”
Irene chuckled quietly in amusement, but observed the other woman worriedly. She was concerned about Taeyeon's not fully understanding or acknowledging what was happening, which could bring great danger to her. But that was Taeyeon: ever so collected on the outside, but very disarranged on the inside. "You are off limits," she would tell the woman, from time to time. Taeyeon lived in the moment, for the moment, and was dangerously impulsive. Luckily, ever since she met Irene, those impulses and outbursts began to be controlled, for the blonde would often run to Irene for advice when she felt she was too lost to handle herself on her own. This time around, however, Taeyeon was doing the opposite of that. She was pushing Irene away. She refused to give the matter thought. But Irene knew, just by observing her friend's reactions throughout their conversation, that Taeyeon could be in trouble, sooner or later. And she most likely would. And that would prey on her mind for many days and weeks to come.
Irene had found out about Taeyeon's uality by accident, not long after they had become what people would call best friends. By then, Taeyeon had given Irene a copy of the key to her apartment. The girl had walking into the apartment in a Saturday morning, the moment Taeyeon was kissing a woman goodbye after one of her meaningless and rather repetitive one night stands. Albeit Irene was staggered at the scene, after the shock passed, she seemed to be unaffected by the new information. Perhaps because the last thing Irene wanted was to lose Taeyeon. She had no real friends. She was an orphan. She hadn't had someone take care of her ever since she left the orphanage, until she met Taeyeon. She decided it wasn't worth it to condemn the woman for something that didn't really have anything to do with herself, so she simply didn't. And that made Taeyeon quite happy, not only because she felt free around Irene, but also because she didn't want to lose her friend, either.
However, ever since the event, Irene had become closely acquainted with Taeyeon's failed love life. She had watched her friend indulge in vain ual pleasure and meet different women every other night in an attempt to fill a void that the blonde never mentioned, but Irene knew was there, eating her heart from the inside out. "Why do you keep doing that if it doesn't make you happy?", Irene would ask, back in the year when she had to live with Taeyeon for some weeks, every time a strange woman walked out of the door, leaving Taeyeon behind with a very laconic countenance. "For a moment, it is fun. It makes me relax and forget my troubles. I need that," was always Taeyeon's response. Given that, Irene greatly feared Taeyeon would feel the need to rebel against the shackled and repressed lifestyle destiny had hurled her into, and jump right into a ual endeavor with Tiffany. And she feared that because Tiffany was the only child of the man Taeyeon had married. Should Taeyeon take Tiffany as her next prey, and should Tiffany's father find out, that couldn't possibly end well for Taeyeon.
There was also another scenario Irene had pictured, in which her friend falls in love with Tiffany and all hell breaks loose. Taeyeon's chances of getting hurt were twice as great, because everyone knew, no matter how tough life and its events can get, nothing could possibly be worst for a woman than a broken heart. And Taeyeon couldn't take another broken heart. Irene knew that because Taeyeon had told her in the same day the former had walked into Taeyeon's little make out session, after they talked about it. "Something broke within me years ago alongside with my heart. My whole life, maybe. It left me with some issues, you know," Taeyeon had said, amidst hot tears. Those words had never left Irene's mind, nor had the face Taeyeon had while uttering them. Irene knew how intimately Taeyeon had known suffering in her past, and all she wished for her friend was happiness.
But what if Tiffany became Taeyeon's happiness?
“I have to go back,” Irene said, deciding it was best to leave her thoughts behind, before they got too wild. She checked her watch once, then checked an old clock on the wall, and nodded to herself. “I must be there in 15 minutes. Will you be fine?” she asked, eyeing Taeyeon.
The blonde smiled. “I was fine before I met you, wasn't I?”
Irene smiled back and held out her hand, taking Taeyeon's. “I know. You're my tough girl. But do keep in touch so that I can sleep peacefully at night.”
Taeyeon nodded in response and the two of them got up. They enveloped each other in a warm embrace, with Taeyeon's chin resting on Irene’s shoulder, as the latter rubbed the blonde’s back affectionately. “Take care, please,” Irene whispered.
“You too, kid,” Taeyeon responded, and the two broke apart. Irene left hurriedly after the two exchanged kind smiles, and dropped a few dollar bills at the table, asking for Taeyeon to pay for her.
***
“Hello, Mrs. Hwang. Did you have a nice lunch?” Mrs. Winters’s voice called, forcing Taeyeon’s attention out of the latter’s musings.
The blonde smiled embarrassedly. “Just Taeyeon, please.” Being called Mrs. Hwang still sounded too strange to her. “And, yes, I’ve had a very pleasant lunch, thank you.” She bobbed her head politely, then searched the surroundings with a quick gaze.
“Is there anything I can do for you, dear?”
“Oh?” Taeyeon looked back at the old lady. “Oh, no, no. Thank you, Mrs. Winters. I’ll be just fine.” She pursed her lips together and made a small pause in her speech before adding, “I’ll be at the library, if you need me.”
The older woman smiled amusedy. “Very well. I see Tiffany’s little hobby has rubbed off on you. Go enjoy the books, and call me if you need anything.”
Taeyeon beamed sheepishly and nodded, watching the woman walk away.
She had spent the whole way back home immersed in thoughts as she mulled over the conversation she had had with Irene, yet she couldn’t judge wrong or correct the younger’s implied theory of her remaining in the house—and married—be Tiffany’s fault; the girl was, indeed, the best part, if not the only good thing, Taeyeon had somehow gotten out of the mess her life had become, but the thought of going through such an ordeal because of someone she barely knew just sounded too implausible. No, that was out of question. She had never been the kind of person who sacrifices herself too much for the sake of others, as selfish as that sounds.
So, what could it be? Why did she keep contradicting herself? If she wanted her freedom so badly, why didn’t she have the guts to fight for it? She knew Mr. Hwang was unlikely to do something to hurt her in any way, should she fill in for the divorce. Regardless, every time she pictured herself having the opportunity to speak out and tell the man she wanted out, a rush of panic ran through her body, and she could almost feel the words getting caught in , choking her as a punishment for her being about to do something atrocious and entirely unwise. But she wasn’t afraid to hurt his feelings, especially when she knew very well that the man had none for her. She didn't understand why her subconscious wanted to dissuade her from going further with her wishes, either. What could it be that, in such a short spam of time, managed to hauntingly and inexplicably shackle her to that house?
Taeyeon shook her head, forcibly wiping the thoughts away. “I’ll cross that bridge when I come to it. I'll get nothing out of fretting,” she mumbled to herself, and then began to take off her lace gloves, graciously walking towards the library, when a soft, timid voice stopped her in her tracks.
“Hello, Taeyeon.”
The blonde turned around slowly and her eyes encountered Tiffany, sweetly dressed in a blue gingham dress and holding a silver tray in her hands, carrying an exquisite cup of tea and a decorated teapot—but, having her attention all focused on Tiffany’s lovely appearance, especially on the way the girl’s curled black hair contrasted beautifully with the pale skin and her light garment, all the rest seemed to be a blur in Taeyeon’s eyes, and she didn't really notice said items.
“I was heading that way, too,” Tiffany said, nodding. “I hope you don’t mind.”
Taeyeon shook her head faintly, keeping her eyes fixated on the brunette in front of her. “No. I-I mean, no, I don’t mind it at all.” She gulped nervously, but quickly recomposed herself. “It's your home.”
In reality, Taeyeon did mind. Not because she disliked Tiffany, no; quite the contrary: she was fond of the girl herself, even though the two didn’t actually have the habit to spend too much time together. There was something about Tiffany that was just too endearing. Too captivating. Too enchanting. Too beautiful. And it wasn't even her jaw-dropping appearance.
The girl smiled kindly, albeit reservedly. “It is yours, as well,” she said, eyeing Taeyeon. With a few gracious steps, she passed by the woman, heading to her destiny.
Taeyeon just followed Tiffany with her eyes for a moment before she started to walk quietly behind the girl. Soon, both were inside the room.
“Nana told me you went out to have lunch with that friend of yours. Did you have a good time?” Tiffany asked, and Taeyeon watched as the girl elegantly walked towards a small coffee table and then set the tray down.
Taeyeon sat down on a small couch by the coffee table, and observed as Tiffany did the same. She nodded faintly, and offered the younger a small smile. “I did.”
Everything about Tiffany was too enchanting for Taeyeon not to keep her eyes on the girl. From the delicate way the brunette’s fingers tidied her outfit, to the way her lips curved into perky white smiles, every small thing Tiffanydid was enough to leave Taeyeon in awe. The blonde thought she has never seem a more gracious and charming woman in her entire life. Tiffany was almost magical, and looked sweet enough to melt under a warm touch.
Tiffany responded with a simple smile. She bent over and pulled the silver tray nearer her, and then picked up the teapot to pour the sweet-scented liquid into he cup she had brought along. “Would you care for tea, Taeyeon?”
Taeyeon eyed the fancy clock at the corner. “At this hour?” she indagued, finding it odd to drink tea at nearly two in the afternoon.
Tiffany giggled. “I understand your reaction. I know it is an unusual habit, but I like to have tea after lunch, sometimes. Even more if I didn't enjoy my meal very much, which was the case today. we had meatloaf,” Tiffany explained, making a disgusted face.
Taeyeon, amused as she was, let the corner of her lips twitch into a small smile. “I take it you don’t like it.”
“I don't. To be frank, I don't really enjoy having meat but oh, well, sometimes I just have to eat it.”
The blonde mildly enlarged her grin. “I see. What do you like to eat, then?”
Tiffany shrugged. “Mostly sweets and everything else Nana doesn’t let me binge on because she’s afraid I’ll put on weight. Like pasta, for instance. I love pasta. But Nana says I shouldn't eat it too much, and she does it so often that I've really started to feel guilty every time I finish a plate of pasta.” She stopped for a minute and frowned. “I don't want to become neurotic like her, though.”
Taeyeon chuckled shyly. “I'm sure she is only caring for your health. But regardless, you needn't worry. You're already perfect. And I'm sure you'd look just as nice with a couple more pounds, should you put on weight.”
Tiffany blushed at the compliment and gazed at Taeyeon. She smiled gratefully and then giggled, taking the cup in her lips and gulping down a bit of her strawberry tea. “Thank you.”
Taeyeon, after realizing what she had just said, felt like taking the silvery tray Tiffany had brought with her and smashing it into her face. She knew she should not be complimenting the young woman in such ways, but the words just came out naturally, and Taeyeon couldn't hold them back. Thankfully, Tiffany's response was just as natural, contrary to Taeyeon's expectations—she had imagined the girl would find the whole situation very odd.
Tranquilized by Tiffany's positive reply, Taeyeon smiled embarrassedly. She looked away, letting her eyes travel through the width and beauty of the private library, and both of them fell silent—so silent, even, that, if Taeyeon paid close enough attention, all that could be heard was Tiffany's breath and the strawberry-scented liquid descending .
She discreetly and cautiously drew her gaze back to Tiffany. She beheld as the brunette sipped her tea quietly, looking either down or at the cup, but never at her. She wondered if she was making her uncomfortable, and was willing to say something to break the awkward silence, but she couldn't think of anything. She took one last glance at Tiffany and looked away once again, taking a deep, but silent breath.
Tiffany was a very interesting girl, Taeyeon thought. Quiet, but communicative—she could tell by how easily the younger started and engaged in conversations. Very warm, but reserved. Polite and classy, but a bit deviant from ladylike manners, occasionally—she was, after all, clearly morose over the fact she couldn't eat what or as much as she wanted. She also had quirky habits and didn't like meat. That was all Taeyeon knew about thus far, but it was enough to make the blonde find her very intriguing.
Tiffany was a puzzle Taeyeon would love to have the opportunity to piece together.
“Maybe we could eat out together, too, someday,” Tiffany broke the silence, albeit almost inaudibly, and looked Taeyeon hesitantly. “I think it would be good if we got to know each other better I really want to.”
The older woman turned her attention to the girl once more and took a minute to respond, but finally smiled kindly at her, easing Tiffany's fear of being turned down. Taeyeon could never turn her down, even if it were too risky for her to appease to Tiffany's wish.
“Where would you like to go?”
Tiffany nearly sighed in relief, but contained herself and, putting down her cup of tea, smiled contently as she spoke: “There’s this nice ice cream parlor Nana used to take me to when I was little. I haven’t gone there in a while, but I’d really like to. They have the best ice cream flavors. We could go there this week and take a stroll downtown, too. How would you like that?”
Taeyeon allowed her grin to grow wider upon hearing Tiffany's suggestion and, bobbing her head a few times, gladly responded:—
“I'd be delighted.”
***
“So, you said you used to work, right?” Tiffany asked, getting the blonde’s attention as both of them sat by a small table inside the cozy ice cream parlor. The pastel colors and pretty decor of the joint helped build a comfortable and friendly atmosphere between the two, putting them at ease and facilitating their being around each other.
Three days prior to the current events, going out with Tiffany didn’t sound like the world’s most clever idea to Taeyeon, albeit she did agree to it very enthusiastically. The blonde was very wary around Tiffany and was, although reluctantly, doing her best not to get too close with the girl, for she was aware of the consequences that could possibly ensue; but her efforts to resist the tide that pulled her so violently towards Tiffany was always in vain, and she could only abide every time the dark-haired young woman asked her for something with that sparkle of expectation and darling innocence in her eyes.
To Tiffany, on the other hand, going out with Taeyeon was exactly what she wanted and even needed—both for her own contentment and for her peace of mind.
That night Tiffany saw Taeyeon weep so heartfeltly while saying her prayers had been engrained in her mind ever since, and she couldn't help feeling bad about her behavior around the woman in the first time she saw her everytime she remembered how miserable Taeyeon looked that night. The blonde could be, thus far, still a stranger to Tiffany, but the girl did not want her to feel sad, or lonely, or purposeless, and that was because she knew how it felt like to have those dark feelings twirl around one’s mind. Knowing how terrible it felt, she had become very compassionate.
Tiffany saw in Taeyeon an opportunity to fill in many voids in her heart, and also help the woman fill in some of hers. But she knew she needed to reach out.
“I did,” Taeyeon responded shortly.
Tiffany took a spoonful of her chocolate sundae as she eyed the woman. “Nearby?”
Taeyeon hesitated for a moment, unsure of how the girl would react to her response, but decided it would be best to tell her the truth. “I used to work for your father’s journal,” she said in a small voice, taking a sip of her milkshake soon after as to avoid speaking about it any further.
“Oh.” Tiffany remained quiet for a second, frowning a little. “Then, you two met there?”
Taeyeon nodded, looking away. “In a way.”
Tiffany pondered for a moment, wondering if her father and Taeyeon had interacted often before everything happened, and her breath shortened at the thought of her old man taking the woman in front of her on a date. Albeit unknowingly to herself, her frown grew stronger and more obvious as certain thoughts and scenarios rushed throught her mindㅡwhich did catch Taeyeon’s attention, but the woman dared not to say a thing about it. In the end, Tiffany decided to shake off the strangely disturbing ideas, knowing well that developing them or speaking up would be of no use and was likely to ruin the mood. “What did you do there?”
“I worked as a columnist.”
“What were your articles about?” Tiffany inquired further, growing interested and also trying to dissuade her mind from focusing on the greatest and most curious question that had yet to be answered: why in the world did Taeyeon and her father get married? And why were they so secretive about it?
“Everything. I was lucky I had a lot of freedom to decide what I would write. I wasn’t bound to only one type of text. I could write articles on up-to-date and serious matters, such as politics, or I could write more freely and lightly and make a chronicle, an anecdote, or play around and create a witty fable with a good moral.” Taeyeon curved her lips into a bittersweet smile. “It was very nice.”
Tiffany’s face lit up. Taeyeon’s response had gotten her so excited she even forgot she was going to ask her why she quit the job. “When you said you worked for the paper, I imagined you were just some kind of reporter, but if you could write that much… That makes you a writer, doesn’t it? You can write anything!”
Taeyeon chuckled shyly. “If you want to put it like that. But it was nothing special. I had a good freedom to create, but not enough to assemble my texts the way I wanted to. My columns had very limited space, unfortunately. That was the only downside.”
Tiffany grew more fascinated by each word that scaled Taeyeon's scarlet lips. For so long had she admired all those writers whose works she had so eagerly read, and wondered how could anybody have such talent as to convey stories and emotions through writing. To know that Taeyeon had that ability, and has actually executed her talent multiple times, just made the interest she already nurtured for the woman grow more intense, and she was so busy thinking about that that her self-awareness failed her, impeding her from noticing that she was staring at Taeyeon with a bright, toothy smile on her face.
But Taeyeon did notice it and, hadn't her a good willpower, strong enough to make her swiftly avert her gaze before she could melt under Tiffany's doey eyes, she would still be staring pathetically at the young woman, mulling multiple times over how adorable she could be.
However, once Tiffany realized she was being not as subtle as it takes to be entirely polite, she quickly snapped out of it, slightly mortified for having had stared so blatantly and for so long. She cleared before uttering a recluse apology, afraid she might had made the blonde uncomfortable, and then anxiously shoved more ice ceam in . “Is that why you were always doing something in the den when you first arrived? Were you writing for the journal?”
Taeyeon eyed the brunette again, secretly thankful for her changing the subject. “It’s complicated,” she said in a small voice. “But, yes, I was writing. You can say it’s an habit of mine.”
“When did you start writing?”
“At a very young age. It’s always been the thing I love the most.”
“Why so?”
“Well, just like you, I’ve always liked to read. I used to be mesmerized by how creative and beautiful the stories I read were, and I wondered how the writers felt as they wrote those stories, so I decided to try doing it myself. And I fell in love it with,” Taeyeon responded, pushing the half-empty milkshake glass away and smiling timidly. “I have never stopped and have only worked on improving myself ever since.”
Tiffany nodded understandingly, taking in Taeyeon's words with admiration, and then both fell silent for a few seconds.
“It’s a beautiful work.”
Taeyeon looked up, eyeing Tiffany curiously.
“Writing, I mean,” Tiffany added, gazing at Taeyeon. “It’s like magic, I think. Books and stories take you elsewhere, and is fascinating to think how you connect with the characters. people who don’t even exist. You laugh, you cry, you get anxious, you build up expectations. And there's also books who shine a light into your thoughts and help you through difficult times, and those are equally as special and important as those about tales of fiction. Anyone who can convey such things through texts and enthrall a reader so deeply to the point of evoking emotions on them, or changing their lives, is sure to be special. The world wouldn’t be half as interesting if it werent for books, but books wouldn't exist without writers.” The brunette finished as she beamed, supporting her face on her fist. “You people have a gorgeous way to perceive and to feel, and your talent allows you to show that. That's extraordinary.”
Taeyeon observed the girl talk, entranced by the sensitive and delicate way she spoke and elated by how kindly Tiffany regarded something that was so special and important to her. Tiffany seemed to understand perfectly the magic and the wonder Taeyeon had always seen in writing, but never had the change to talk about. The last time she tried to ramble about the art of a text, she was a teenager, and the only person who would pretend to pay any attention to her and take her seriously was her mother, who didn’t whatsoever encourage her to pursue such passion, for she thought Taeyeon should be more worried about finding a good husband while she was young.
Of course, she was unaware of the truth back then.
The blonde finally let her lips curve into a full, glad smile.
“I mean, I haven’t read any of your pieces, but I’m sure you’re just as good as any other writer I’ve read so far. You might be even better. Do you still have any of your works with you, per chance?”
Taeyeon raised her eyebrows. “I think I might have some unpublished and old works stored somewhere. Why?”
“I’d like to read them,” the girl responded, smiling. “I’ve spent my whole life reveling in and admiring the work of a variety of writers from afar, but… now I have one living with me, and I’d like to see what she has to offer me,” Tiffany finished, casually looking at Taeyeon’s eyes. “If that’s okay with you, of course.”
Taeyeon smirked. “Well, why not? I’ll pick something for you. But don’t get your hopes too high, it is nothing compared to the kind of thing you read. I’ve never written an entire story, and I don’t trust my skills to be nearly as good as those of the authors you like...”
The brunette smiled, satisfied. “I think you’re selling yourself too short. I’m sure you must be great.”
“Very well. I shall show you a couple of my texts, but with one condition,” Taeyeon added. Tiffany just eyed the woman, waiting for her to continue. “I know you draw. I want you to show me your drawings.”
“How do you know about them?”
Taeyeon bit on her lower lip sheepishly as she sank in her seat. “I passed by your bedroom once and noticed a bunch of paper and pencils scattered on your desk. I got curious and… well, nobody was around, so I might have barged in to see what was that. I’m sorry. But I didn’t touch anything.” That last part was a lie, but more of a white one. Taeyeon didn’t want Tiffany to be mad. Besides, she wanted Tiffany herself to show and explain them to her. “I only caught a glimpse of them.”
Tiffany giggled. “No apology needed. If I’m being honest, I’m glad you asked about it,” she admitted. “Nobody really cares about my drawings…”
“How come?”
“Nana and my father think drawing is not important or meaningful. They pick on my constant reading, too, saying that I should do something else, like go out or socialize, make friends and acquaintaces, find s good man. But as my father says, ‘at least I am learning something and enriching my culture.’ He secretly takes pride of my knowledge about literature.” She smiled lopsidedly. “I think this is why I don’t draw as often as I would like to. What’s the point of drawing if I have nobody to show my work to? I don’t like the idea of doing things only for myself, that sounds a bit meaningless. I'd like to have someone to tell about the things I'm passionate about.”
Taeyeon’s countenance saddened. She, better than anyone else, knew how bad it felt to be ignored, particularly when trying to showcase something you love. She knew it was terrible and disheartening, and she hated the fact that Tiffany was put through that. It could be an insignificant nuisance to some people, but she understood that it wasn’t, and was willing to be the one to encourage Tiffany to purse whatever passion she had.
“But I’ll gladly show them to you, if you’re interested” Tiffany added, now smiling excitedly, before Taeyeon could say anything. “That is, if you won’t mind in case I get a little carried away talking about them.”
The blonde smiled back and shook her head, observing the girl as she waited for the latter to finish her half-melted sundae. “I won’t.”
***
“Amazing,” Taeyeon muttered as she ran her fingers through the drawing. The two had already gotten back to the house, and had been going through Tiffany's drawings for nearly an hour.
“Do you really think so?” Tiffany asked, focusing her gleaming eyes on the blonde.
“That I do.” She nodded, turning her face to eye the girl beside her. “You're great. All of those are great,” she added, pointing to the paper sheets scattered on the small desk.
Tiffany smiled so widely that she felt like she was about to rip her face apart. “Thank you. It means a lot to me.”
“I especially like this one,” Teyeon said, picking up a drawing of a bird sitting comfortably on a dry branch of a tree. “I love the details. You're incredible, Tiffany,” she complimented, her concentration showing in her furrowed eyebrows as she studied the drawing again. “You should really do this more often.”
The brunette was elated. Drawing was an activity she had always been very fond of, and she had been confident in her skills from a very young age. Unfortunately, she had also been the only one to judge them good or bad, for her father and Mrs. Winters didn’t really encourage her to mature her practice. To see Taeyeon amazed by her drawings and complimenting her on them so sincerely made her heart race in content. Taeyeon would never understand how much that small, simple moment shared between the two of them meant for Tiffany.
And her being complimented on her drawings definitelty wasn’t about feeding her ego. Truth be told, Tiffany barely had an ego. That was all about her being given attention, and freedom to talk about something she loved as much as she wanted, as eagerly as she would. That sort of attention had never been given to her. Not until Taeyeon arrived.
Thankful eyes modestly gazed at the blonde who remained enthralled by the variety of drawings as her hand swiftly traced them one by one and her eyes delighted in the details. “Thank you. Really,” Tiffany spoke softly, making Taeyeon’s head turn.
Taeyeon nodded, crooked a small smile, and put the drawing down. “You’re welcome,” she said, looking at Tiffany once more. Her eyes involuntarily flickered up and down, from the girl’s eyes to her lips. “Don’t forget to show me your new drawings, if there shall be any,” she mumbled.
Tiffany smiled contently and nodded, happy for having finally found someone with whom she could share something.
She was no longer alone.
***
After many tossing and turns, Taeyeon woke up in the middle of a very restless night. Her mind was running wild and her body didn’t seem to be willing to settle as she kept relentlessly trying to fall asleep for good. After one of the many 15-minute naps she managed to take within the last 4 hours she had been in bed, she had given up.
The blonde sat up on th bed, leaning back on the bulky couple of pillows she had stacked behind her small-framed back. She exhaled both exhaustedly and annoyedly, and rolled her eyes before reaching out and turning on the exquisite lamp resting on the nightstand. As she withdrew, she picked up one of the 3 books neatly placed right beside the lamp. It was one of the poetry books Tiffany had personally picked for her. “You should read this one when you feel blue or bored. It’s a collection of really light-hearted and witty poems. I promise you you won’t find anything related to pain or sadness there, as surprising as it sounds,” she remembered the girl say, giggling shyly as she handed over the book, a couple of days back in the library.
Taeyeon’s lips curved in a small smile upon recalling the memory.
Just as the woman was about to start reading, her eyes gazed around the room and stopped in a piece of paper, seemingly folded, lying next to the door. Intrigued, and wondering if it could be something important she could had unknowningly lost, she got up and calmly approached the object.
She crouched down and picked the paper up, turning it around. It was indeed folded, and an elegantly-written message read:
“I would like you to have this, Taeyeon.
Take it as a token of my gratitude and appreciation for everything you did for me today.
Tiffany”
Taeyeon’s fingers quickly moved to unfold the paper as soon as she finished reading Tiffany’s note, and a hearty smile fomed on her lips as she beheld its content. It was the bird drawing that she so fascinatedly had complimented and observed not many hours ago, and that had been silently slipped under her door by Tiffany herself, when she had made sure the woman had fallen asleep. The girl thought it was only fair that Taeyeon had the drawing, in view that the woman liked it so much. And, to be frank, Tiffany didn’t really know what to do with it. And it was true, too, that she also wanted to find a way to thank Taeyeon for the great afternoon they had shared that day. The drawing was the only thing Tiffany knew that would possibly please the blonde, for, you see, Tiffany didn’t really know Taeyeon yet.
Taeyeon got up with the drawing in hands and went back to bed without ever dropping the amused smile from her lips. She sat down and grazed her fingers through the paper, chuckling to herself as she shook her head.
“Oh, Tiffany.”
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