Ace high school, get good grades, enroll in university, get a job, get rich and die from overdosing on drugs. I had it all planned out and set in motion. 

But what is life without destiny and fate ruining everything right?

Debating whether or not to continue college as  I didn't even know why I entered it in the first place- oh wait for me to get employed- I found myself trapped in a vicious cycle of being ed up with life. 

Hours went by. Days went by. Weeks went by. Months went by with a blur...

Until God decided to fire, and I literally mean fire, flame, burn  it up and all hell broke loose.

1 month earlier

I slammed the front door as I kicked off my muddy sport shoes. With my left hand locking the door, I switched all the hall lights on including the kitchen. Tossing my backpack towards the sofa, I placed the bag of ingredient I bought earlier and started cooking dinner. Mom was out working. She called earlier saying she’ll be staying at her sister’s house for a week. I know I shouldn’t be sad. But would it really be so bad for her to welcome me home after being away for 4 months?

“Jesus christ, Erika. Get a grip. Get a ing grip and get over yourself. You’re not 8 anymore.”

My vision started blurring. Soon, my chest started squeezing and I had to stop stirring the broccoli stir-fry. Money’s been tight. I couldn't indulge in having poultry at the moment. I pushed aside the sliding door to the balcony and stepped out. The weather has been gloomy for the past weeks not that I’m complaining. I like gloomy and windy days. For some unknown reason, the sun repulses me. Maybe the fear of getting tanned and ugly. I’m already unattractive. There’s no need to intensify it any more. 

“Deep breaths, deep breaths.” I whispered. Inhale, exhale. The light-headedness faded, claiming myself down. I gazed at the grey towers, crumbling houses and the clouded sky. I stared, mesmerised. Hoping for a miracle maybe. 

Hope. 

Humans manifested a way to keep them strong when faced with a tribulation. Cruel, I tell you.

Telling yourself that things will get better. Plain cruelty. That everything will be okay. Self-torture. But do miracles exist? Or is it effort? A lightning flashed with thunder booming almost instantly.

I chuckled. The morbid things I wonder about. The stir-fry is probably getting soggy. Turning away from the rail, a black flash caught my eye. “What was that?” Looking back, a dark creature, a raven maybe? or an eagle? was gliding through the air. It’s gracefulness caught my attention. It seemed to notice it’s spectator and dipped low out of sight only to swiftly fly up again. It came so close to the rail, I staggered back towards the glass door. It was huge. Just as it had appeared, it disappeared. 

Shrugging, I head back inside to my soggy stir-fry. Dinner on the couch, I settled down on a channel showing Breaking Dawn. Regardless how badly slammed the movie was, I happen to enjoy it. I love it. The thought of being immortal, unlimited time to discover yourself. Not having to worry about money, getting a job and enjoying life before you unfairly die young. And having a lover, a mate that would love you all the way. Being accepted even if only one person loved you. You are loved. My heart clenched. 

Wow, I’m being a sobbing train-wreck today. “ But what chance do I have at having a life like Bella?” I sighed. Little did I know.

Not bothering to clean up the dishes, I opened the latest mate themed fiction I have been reading. After countless wishing to have the eternal life and mate, I fell into a dreamless slumber.

~

Lightning flashed, revealing the dark figure standing at the balcony. He stood letting the rain soak him as he stared at the unmoving woman's back. Scoffing, so that was the woman he was fated to live with.

What a disappointment.