Two days traveling with the small caravan had Sungjoo at his wits end. On the one hand, he had never been around people where he could fall asleep and nothave to worry that they would kill him as he rested. On the other, he could feel their slightly judging looks when he would sharpen a knife, or when he rolled up his sleeves to help with tasks and his scars had shown. His arms were covered in them from years of scuffles in the city streets, and only now did he feel self-conscious about showing them.

All in all, it made for interesting travel.

Siakera stayed silent during those two days, despite his attempts to speak with her. Her one reply had been to tell him to come speak with her in the realm of gods, which only served to irritate him. He hadn't been able to reach it with her help, how was he supposed to do it alone?

And so he spent his time trying to help as best he could, though he could tell that he didn't fully fit in with them. Jungsu was welcoming as could be, as were his siblings, but some of the other men were a little wary of the former assassin, as was Jungsu's wife Qian. And the husband of Jungsu's eldest sister, a tall thin man by the name of ZhouMi, had taken to finding somewhere else to be when Sungjoo would offer help around him. Though according to Kyuhyun, Jungsu's only brother, it was just the way the man was. 

"You'll grow on him," Kyuhyun told him with a smile, handing the younger man a cloth to wipe his greasy hands on. A wheel on one of the wagons had broken and he had volunteered to help fix it, alongside the slightly older man. Kyuhyun was of a height with Sungjoo, thinner in the shoulders but not as athletically built, with a quick smile and easy manner. "It's your... You..."

He cocked his head to the side and studied Sungjoo with a surprisingly curious eye. "You say you follow the Mother," he began, slowly but steadily heading toward what Sungjoo had been hesitant to speak of. "And yet you carry weapons. I have seen fighters, the men who travel with the caravans and protect them for money; you move like one of them. But they carry swords and pray to Therisa, the Warrior, while you don't do either one. So...?"

He left the question hanging in the air, unspoken, and for a long moment Sungjoo wrestled with how much he should tell the older man. In the end he decided that he would rather keep some things to himself, though, and instead asked, "Why do followers of Siakera abhor violence? If it is in protection of one's life, then shouldn't you be willing to do whatever is necessary?" Kergisa taught that those who were not willing to fight for what they wanted did not deserve to have it, and that included their life. And love was a high motivation to fight, and Sungjoo could guess from the way that Siakera had latched herself onto him that the Mother goddess didn't condemn violence. At least, not if done for the right reasons. So why did her followers?

Kyuhyun's lips twisted in a half smile as he shook his head, wiping the wagon grease from his own hands before tossing the rag into a small clay pot meant for dirtied things. "Okay," he allowed, and Sungjoo knew he was referring to his own avoidance to answer. He took a seat on the end of the wagon, one leg swinging as he examined Sungjoo from head to toe. "The Mother teaches that we must love one another, and that everything happens for a reason. That if something bad happens, it is because the person doing it needs her help. So if we fight them, then how is that helping them?"

Sungjoo shook his head slowly as he considered his answer. "So then if you're attacked, you wouldn't protect one another? Not even your children?"

"If it is the Mother's will that they die, who am I to interfere?"

"But..." Sungjoo paused, unsure how much he should say in return, but Kyuhyun motioned for him  to continue. He took a deep breath and plunged in, determined to understand this and where he stood on the matter with Siakera herself. "... If you don't fight for your life or for those you love, then how is that truly love? I admit, I'm no expert, but how can I say that I love someone if I am willing to watch them die because I won't protect them?"

As he suspected, Kyuhyun's face darkened ever so slightly at the words, but to his credit the man shook it off and shrugged. "Love is for everything and everyone, Sungjoo. You can't just pick and choose who to love. Just because someone is related to me doesn't make their life more worthy than that of the person trying to take it away. They still must be redeemed, while I am already in the Mother's embrace. If I die I know that my soul will go to the Lake of Tirin, but if I kill someone who does not follow the Mother, then where will their soul go? Everyone should have the chance for redemption."

Not everyone deserved the chance; people like Wenhan deserved to be put down like a rabid dog. Sungjoo's brow furrowed and he opened his mouth to respond with that, but at the last moment thought better of it and merely gave the man a slight bow. "Than