*Caugh* *Caugh* *Sniffle*

Ugh! I guess I caught a cold, from sleeping with a wet hair last night and also from the sudden change in weather, It was freezing cold! Luckily, I didn’t have any fevers, yet, but my throat was pretty sore and my nose blocked but runny. I always hated the feeling when I caught a cold, I had to breathe with my mouth all the time which didn’t help a bit with my sore throat and I ended up coughing even more, let alone the weakness I had to endure in my entire body.

I had to literally drag myself out of bed, since I didn’t want my Sunday to go to waste by me sleeping the whole day, even though it was already 2 pm...2 PM?!?! ‘oh my friking lord!’ I jumped out from my bed then from my bedroom to see already awaken Minseo, sitting alone at the kitchen table and eating her lunch, pizza. I gulped, firstly because I was starving and secondly, because I freakin love pizza! But somehow, I was kinda anxious to join her. Maybe it’s because I haven’t seen her for the past whole week since she kept herself locked up in her room, only going out when she had classes, or maybe it’s because I felt like she was still mad at me for I don’t even remember what, or maybe.... I felt like I’ve betrayed her. Yea, that’s probably it… I couldn’t help myself from feeling that way, especially since last night when Jungkook confessed to me. I knew that she truly loved Jungkook and hated to see him spend most of his time with someone else, but it’s not like I tried to make him like me, in fact I was trying my best to get those two together but it seems like I’ve failed miserably. I know how hurt she might feel right now, I could relate to her after all… I loved Jimin, I still do but, he likes Minseo. It’s a lie if I say I don’t feel hurt at all or I’m not mad, but, I could never bring myself to hate Minseo for having Jimin’s heart. She was my best-friend after all. I’m not saying that she hates me or anything, it’s just...she’s been acting really weird lately, she doesn’t talk to me and acts like I don’t exist, even when I’m trying to talk to her. Maybe that’s one other reason why I’m feeling anxious to join her now, but oh well..I’m just gonna act as the usual me, like nothing had ever happened.

“hey~” I hummed as I approached her and sat next to her “any plates for me?” I pouted, acting mad that she forgot to bring an extra plate for me, which she shrugged indifferently in response. I sighed then went to the cupboard and picked up a plate for myself before plopping back down next to her.

We ate in silence, the only sound that could be heard was our munching on the pizza. I could feel the tension between us, but played it cool. I tried to start a conversation by asking her random stuff, such as: how her day was going, how was school, and as such, but to only earn a nod or a hum from her. It was getting annoying, I gotta tell ya, so I stopped trying. It wasn’t until she was done eating when I heard her voice for the first time over the last week

“you know,” she started suddenly, making my head snap up to see her. My eyes widened in surprise since she finally decided to speak up, only to wish she hadn’t opened afterwards. Her words were like a snake’s bite shooting venom into my heart

“Jimin asked me out last week, he’s waiting for my answer today, since he’s a pretty nice and sweet guy, I thought why not giving him a chance?” she said with an evil smirk on her face that was filled with sarcasm. “I’m going out with him and you,” she stood up, her smirk never leaving her face as she looked down at my dumbfounded face in disdain “why don’t you continue your make out session with Jungkook in the pool?” and then she disappeared in her room before slamming the door shut with a loud bang.

‘why is it so hard to breathe all of a sudden?’ I felt an uneasy tightness in my chest, making it hard for me to breathe. My right hand reached to the left side of my chest, clutching it hard as I suddenly felt a sharp pain shooting through my heart. Every time I tried to breathe, the too familiar pain in my heart increased. I quickly got up, my hand still clutching on my left side chest, as I knew how to make the pain to go away, I lied on my left side and scrunched my legs up to my chest tightly. Time passed and luckily, I was able to breathe easily, not noticing the shedding tears as they carelessly dripped down my eyes and then on the couch. ‘why, Minseo? why?’ I weeped in the empty room. Minseo as long gone out, leaving me alone at the dorm with my aching heart. The thing that hurt me the most, wasn’t the fact that Minseo was going to start dating Jimin, it was the way she said it...like she wanted to declare war between us. Was she going to take revenge on me for getting too close with Jungkook? Was she going to hate on me after being friends, no, best friends for almost three years? Now I’m the one who feels betrayed...I felt dizzy, I felt weak, I felt...sick.

-

It’s cold, very cold...I weakly opened my eyes meeting nothing but pure darkness. I noticed that all of the lights were off and It’s already pitch dark outside. ‘how long was I asleep?’ I thought to myself as I tried to sit up, my back and neck sore from the uncomfortable position I had, but couldn’t move. I was too weak to move. I felt cold sweats that were forming on my forehead which made me realize I had a fever. I didn’t have anybody to take care of me and if I wanted to stay alive, I knew I had to move and do something, so I sat up, ignoring the weakness throughout my body. I the lights and checked the time, 10:30 pm. I sighed and dragged my feet to the kitchen to pour myself a glass of water. Right when I wanted to take a sip, I heard three loud bangs on the front door making me to almost drop the glass of water. Who could it be this late at night? I weakly dragged myself to the front door, not bothering to look through the peephole I opened the door

“Yah, Kim Jihye! why didn’t you answer your pho- oh my god! what happened to you?!? are you okay??”

“w-what are you doing here?”

“I called you for like 100 times, but you didn’t pick up so I got worried. What’s wrong? you sick?”

“go home, Jungkook” I said coldly before closing the door, but he blocked the way with his foot

“what do you mean? I can’t leave you be on your own in this condition! where is Minseo?” he pushed the door open and I didn’t have the energy to fight him back

“I don’t know”

“what?”

“I don’t know where she is, Jung- ugh!” there it is again. That disgusting pain. I clutched my heart, my head spinning and legs too weak to support my weight, I fell but before hitting the ground, strong arms got a hold of me

“Jihye! Jihye can you hear me? Jihye wake up!!” he screamed but to no avail. The world out in front of my eyes, no..I was the one who out

-

I feel some light shining on my closed eyes, I struggle to open them and succeeded but, all I can see is white. I blinked a few times to clear my blurry vision. Now I can see an unfamiliar ceiling with ceiling lights. The lights were too blinding so I looked away and to my side and saw a guy sitting on a chair next to my bed, resting his head on top of his hands and his hands on my bed. He was facing down so I couldn’t see who he was, but I had a pretty good idea who he might be. The next thing I noticed were the white sheets that I was tucked in, Then the stenching smell of alcohol and disinfectant almost burning my nostrils. I was in a hospital. I slowly and weakly sat up, making the figure next to me to shift on his spot before lifting his head, rubbing his tired eyes he yawned and looked at me

“you’re awake? how are you feeling?” he asked, his voice low and husky, showing he’s not yet fully awake from his slumber

“yea, I’m fine...what happened?” he stood up and stretched, a little in the process, then yawned before answering

“you passed out. You didn’t seem very well so I took you to the hospital” Jungkook explained “do you need anything?” he asked, his eyes looking at me with concern

“j-just a little bit of water?”

“coming right away!” he jumped on his spot before going to the little fridge available in the room and bringing me a glass of iced water “here” he smiled as he handed me the glass and sitting on the edge of my bed. The cool glass felt refreshing against my palm. I took a sip, feeling the icy water going down through my throat in a soothing and calming way, fully waking me up.

“ah! feels so refreshing” I smiled as I took more sips. Jungkook looked at my every move, smiling lovingly at me, but his smile was soon to go away as a frown replaced it. He looked at me worryingly, his mouth opened and closed as if he wasn’t sure about what he was going to say. I looked at him and frowned, copying his actions, before asking

“what’s wrong?”

“Jihye…”

“yea?” I don’t know why but I began feeling anxious

“why didn’t you tell me?”

“tell you about what?”

“about your condition...why didn’t you tell me that you had a heart disease?” My eyes widened

“h-how did you-”

“the doctor told me everything while you were recovering, why did you try to hide such an important thing from me?” he cut me off then reached out his hand to grab mine, gently squeezing it “I would’ve looked after you more”

“I-i...didn’t have any reason to tell you” I pulled my hand wand away from his grip. His eyes widened at my sudden behavior only to pull back his own hand afterwards

“I-i didn’t mean to make you mad...I was just worrie-”

“there is no reason for you to be worried about me, Jungkook” I snapped. Deep down I was fighting with myself to not say those words to him, I was hating myself for hurting him, but I had no choice. I had to stay away from him for Minseo’s sake...for my sake. She was becoming a completely different person because of my overly friendly relationship with Jungkook and I was getting weaker every day because of the stress and anxiety I was having in this situation.

Stress and anxiety were always dangerous for me because of my heart disease.

I hated to break his heart...I hated myself for doing that but, it had to be done. I gathered up all of the courage it took me to say the words I was about to say to him before opening my mouth

“Please leave, Jungkook. Please leave me alone.”

It took a while for him to digest what I just said to him “what do yo-”

“Please!” I cut him off, fighting back my tears. He just looked at me, dumbfounded. He didn’t know how to react, he looked hurt...I hurt Jungkook, yes I did. My vision got blurry from my tears, I didn’t want him to see my tears so I looked down only to feel a shifting on my bed and the figure sitting on it getting closer to me, his arms spread out, ready to take me in them

“Jihye...I-i didn’t mean to hurt you..I-i’m sorry” hurt me? no! I’m the one who’s hurting you, Jungkook. And why are you apologizing? It’s me who should apologize not you! Stop making me feel miserable...stop making me hate myself even more....stop! stop!

“Stop!” I slapped his hands away “Stop it, Jungkook!” I couldn’t help my tears from streaming down, I couldn’t help my heart from beating out of my ribcage, I couldn’t help myself anymore. Jungkook slowly stood up, clearing his throat before speaking

“I-i see...sorry for bothering you I...I’m going to take my leave now. Rest well, Jihye-ssi” and he left. Leaving me to weep on my own.

The room was filled with silence, nothing but my sobbing noise echoing through the walls. The air too thick to swallow, nose too blocked to breathe, heart too broken to mend….

‘I’m sorry...’

--------------------

Author's Note:

Merry Chrismas everyone~!

I'm so sorry for updating such an angsty chapter on a Christmas day, but I couldn't help it x( It had to be done.

I really appreciate your love and support towards this story!!!

Have fun and eats lots of delicious food! stay well and healthy :)

As always, thanks for reading <3