Dear Kwon Jiyong,

this is a post that you will never see.

A post about me ranting about you.

 

I don't know. 

I don't know how your eyes flutter when you're dreaming.

Or the things you say when you're in a deep forty winks.

What kind of music I should blare when the whole world expects too much from you and you can't fulfill their wishes.

If you drink tea and like honey to go with it. 

 

I have no idea,

how your first heartbreak was like. 

If you like your cereals crunchy or soggy.

Of your thoughts when the whole world sleeps but you lie awake. 

How your face looks like when you're writing a song.

 

I will never know,

the feeling of your fingertips making a contact with my skin.

What it's like waking up and you're still sleeping next to me.

You looking at me like I'm the only one who matters.

Holding me tight and saying tomorrow will be better. 

 

I wish I knew all of these.

 

But I will never.

 

Because I'm just another girl in the crowd. 

Holding the glowstick with a crying face and singing along to your songs.

Another fan who doesn't feel alone when she listens to 'Black' and 'Crooked'.

Someone who brags about you.

Finds happiness in seeing you smile.

 

Yeah,

 

just another wide-eyed girl, who's desperately in love with you.