Okay here's the plan.

So...i've mentioned multiple times before that whenever i reveal my fanfic plans, things almost always fall through, that it has come to a point that i share my ideas/plans most likely so that i could let it go...i remember wayy back then...i had this idea i think was quite cool and i kept developing it in my head but never had the courage to write it bcuz i feel i need more preparation since it's quite a complex idea...and one day...a kdrama with similar(but less complicated) idea came out and get lots of love and i didn't want to write the story anymore...cuz ppl will think i was inspired by that drama lol. sobs. shoulda post it first even when it'd remain without chapters...

I always feel safer when i share ideas here cuz it most likely means it'll just end here...but it's more 'dangerous' if i quietly start a fic...bcuz it means i'll probly have one or two or three updates at most and then abandon it for life. and then feel bad about it and then feeling annoyed at myself for feeling so-called guilty while knowing the guilt would never be enough to make me go complete what i started. yadayada dramatic much.

So whenever i share ideas....i feel assured...that my ideas at least would be sent off gracefully...

Anyway, so yesterday i spazzed about Voice, the kdrama that made me feel so so conflicted bcuz i really want to love it...but the flaws are abundance. and especially in areas i prioritize...like characteristics and realistic factor. as much as the drama is suspensefully alluring...they did poorly with characterization especially in developing the depths of the interesting surface they've set up for the characters' characteristics...it keep making me feel the 'could have been's. and that's a horrible feeling. That's how i felt with The Romantic & Idol and that's also what motivated me to write a fic based on that show(probly the only fic i have so far that is based on actual show/drama setting instead of just using idols)...and that fic actually succeeded to be completed /overwhelmed/ so....who knows...

And i doubt any great writer here would write a Voice fanfic for me...so i thought...maybe yknow...i could do it for myself instead n post it....ew....ok whatever. Maybe i'll wait to see if the drama's ending still makes me want to go with this idea(if i'm really going to go through with it)...i might just go watch the whole ending without subs before recaps even come out...lol.

So for this fic...i'm probly going to keep the thriller aspect since Mo Tae Gu's psychoticness is what makes the drama most interesting tbh. (i actually hope he won't die in the drama so i can continue the story lol, even if he's murdered thousands peeps), but i doubt i can do a good job with research on crimes n anything medical/police procedures/factual at all since i'm just lazy haha. And even though the drama did quite good job on research for meanings behind poetry/song/setting/bible verses they incorporate to amp up creepy factor...they actually fail with the simplest parts that don't need much of research n just common sense...like keeping the happenings/reactions/decisions/movements of the characters believable n make sense, and developing the characters. (my my look at that, a writer wannabe who can't even write her own fanfics properly criticizing legit writers...snifle...)

So, since Tae Gu has love for complex sinister poetries n this twisted delusional idea of religion...i'm going to take his poetic side to be the main point of his character n murders here since i don't really plan to go into his religious sick ideas(it's already done in the drama anyway)...the story is supposed to continue years later after Tae Gu escaped and our hero n heroin failed to capture him, i'm planning to kill Jin Hyuk(i hope he dies in the drama lol sorry Jang Hyuk haha)...his character just doesn't inspire me and feel too typical kdrama action hero without anything interesting trait of his own....n he's blocking Kwon Joo's badassness from being developed since he's always there to do all the fighting, it's kinda boring and we need some shakeups in dynamics. His death would force Kwon Joo to be the badass she's always meant to be. And of course, Tae Gu will forever be fascinated by his fan n targets her. Even in the drama, he's already fond of her the first time he saw her, and noted how she's still dedicated after three years(which means his interest in her sustained for those three years even without meeting or knowing her at all...just after a small phone conversation after killing her father n amused by her super hearing)...and his interest n excitement in her amped up when he broke into her home and found out how she even dedicated a wall compiling all his crimes...he seriously was so darn happy n even touched. Even when he relived the moment of that discovery while taking bath and looking at the photo of her with her father, you could see the fondness in his eyes(frankly i think he's eager to get her hair -after murdering her of course- as his collection, is probly what he's thinking when he's her pillow since he collects his victims hairs as souvenirs anyway)...n then when he went to scare her with old recording of her voice when her dad was killed, stiffling giddy happy laughter outside her door while she's being creeped up n reliving her trauma inside. - Those mentioned just now were what happened in the drama btw, not in my plan. If you haven't watched those scenes from my yesterday's post but interested to try now...here: 1 & 2.

So back to my plan...now that we only have our main villain n our now even more haggard, miserable n determined n badass heroine to get her revenge for her father and now for her murdered buddy Jinhyuk who failed to avenge his wife's death(n maybe i'll kill his son too or make Kwonjoo his son's guardian but his son get killed here n done by that psycho...afterall, he did show interest in the poor boy in the drama)...she's still a powerless cop(even though she's the leader of her team...but in the drama they already disbanded her team and maybe i can make her position relegated to mere police call center agent as 'punishment' since the police are corrupt anyway n of course we need our heroine to hit rock bottom even more than she already did so she could be forced to grow n rise up again), we can have the battle to begin. I'm planning for it to start with crimes happening again...the first, being similar to what he did in the drama. maybe he coulv'e been thought as dead here-without legit corpse of course-, but of course, our super heroine would find it suspicious, she knows her enemy too well. but just as she's trying to make her point, the same fashion of murder ends, and begins a new one, and murders keep happening but none follows same style that makes them suspicious to be done by same killer...but....of course the heroine could find something that makes her confident that it's still done by that psycho Tae Gu even though she has no evidence he's alive...or something...with every murder...there's clue she manage to figure out and connect....through a poem she remembered cited by Tae Gu or sth...but then, it ends. no more clues but after sometime the killings continue. And though this time no clue, she's still somehow convinced it had to do with him...she just couldn't find a clue to chase him n figure out what's he up to this time anymore.

And one day, she receive a book, a poetry book...that answers her suspicion that indeed Taegu's back, alive and kickingkilling. He's sending signal to her or rather, some sort of bait to keep her investigating him bcuz he's just a erted child-devil psycho who loves attention n she's the only one who give him the kinda attention he lurvess. And for this new book of poetry..since i'm lazy to go research for sick twisted old poems...i'm planning to just write them...even though i'm no complex twisted poem writer at all n my poems are all just blah...but it'll quench my thirst for not just fanfic but also poem writing...after all, the thing i've been most consistent in writing all these years are poetry anyway, no matter how lame they're. If Kwonjoo needs a sidekick, maybe she can take over Dae Shik or Hyun Ho or Eun Seo...but why do i feel they're all untrustable...it looks like Hyunho will turn out another baddie informer in the drama unless i got it wrong...Dae Shik's already shown as one. Or maybe i can create a super good looking mysterious male OC to be Kwonjoo's sidekick/helper and as her secret weapon to bait her opponent but not outshine her in badass department cuz i need badass Kwonjoo to go up neck to neck with Taegu. I feel like an OC would bring much more to the story. I have an idea how to use him already as i write this...but won't spoil it just in case the fic actually happens. (anyway, other than OC...i suddenly think of Battle's Ryu n how he's so good at creepy character as he had done in his short movie he did years ago...that creepy sinister big grin..../shudders/...it doesn't hurt that he's beautiful too...lol...but...why did i watch it again....now i'm creeped out....T^T...you're supposed to be our cheesy kind wonderful dork of a leader...not this sinister creep. T^T)

So far, how's it...sounds good? lol. /get boo-ed/ The extent of my imagination now makes me wish i'd really follow through this idea and actually publish it here...but...i don't know...my motivation n passion runs fast...

problems to make this happen: like i say i lack vocabs and knowledge when it comes to crime terms etc and i'm so freaking lazy to research much since i'm just lazy and i'm so used to my character-driven style than solid plot progression and events...even though i like things to be realistic...i'm not thaaaaat big on going into crazy details just to make it realistic so called...cmon..even real life isn't as dramatically detailed. and being not crazy detailed for me, is keeping with what i see in real life, realistic. sometimes sloppy, sometimes detailed, not always detailed. like...just bcuz i'm a real person doesn't mean i can list out all things about myself...yes, such a person exist. and just bcuz i want it to be realistic, doesn't mean i have to refer to real statistics bcuz you know what....real life has shocking unconventional surprises too that you think won't work, but actually, does even if not to majority. my own life has taught me that. sometimes, being realistic isn't about being able to make others relate bcuz each of us are different individuals going through different unique situations...to me, realistic just loosely means, make sense generally. i'm never one to nitpick n i hate those who do nitpick. lol. i'm just asking for things to make sense which sadly rarely happen in kdramas. even if they're just dramas and shouldn't be taken seriously...like fanfics....i always feel characters=humans. just by that logics, shouldn't things happening to them n done by them at least make sense in human sense? also, i have very short span of passion/inspiration/dedication to work with longer fics...

I think the dynamics i'm going for here, is what i initially wanted for Unlock the Devil Fourever. battle between good and evil, a race, cat n mouse game of sorts, time bomb thingy...just that i got stuck and lost in the mountains for that fic...bcuz of the heroine's overrealistic goodness and weakness n wishywashyness (purposely made though she's not exactly a damsel in distress since no knights in shining armour to save her, and if they try...they die) that makes her keep being steps behind the devil...despite her determination and her effort to change...but humans don't change that easily especially when a certain trait is ingrained in them. that's what happened to the main character. also, bcuz i'm writing it from first person...while the fic actually involved lots of characters...it caused lots of unanswered questions to readers, bcuz to keep it realistic, she can't know everything...especially when she's always referring herself as dumb. as much as i try hinted it...it's not easy to catch them...and the devil's role relegated to backseat since the fic doesn't include his pov from the getgo...and i hate to just make his pov out of nowhere...bcuz it doesn't feel coherent/consistent with the rest of 30 chaps. it's quite frustrating...

So if i do write this Voice fic...(which i already have a title for it)...most definitely won't have Tae Gu's pov....or maybe i should just use third person(but not omniscient...i hate omniscient ugh)...Taegu is the psychopath...his mind is too precious/divine for us to break in...just like in Floral Rain...i made the story solely from Kevin's pov...not one for Kwanghee until we reached the end and get a glimpse of his diary that just told a little about his mental/psychological state...why...bcuz Kwanghee's mind and feelings in that fic was the sacred part i want the readers to feel/imagine from his reactions/demeanor in the fic....that's the only way i feel we could get realistically intimate with Kevin's feelings and thoughts. We can't get both or it'd get inorganic. idk...my own belief/thought lol.

Ahh...after talking this much...and entertaining the idea and developing it all in my head....it would be a pity to not actually start it as a legit fic...but knowing myself...n how i would internally pile up expectations for myself and having no confidence at all to fulfill that expectation...i'd mostly call it quits before trying to avoid the fear of disappointment of own lack of determination n ability. i'm just this hard thinkertalker but very much lazy doer. So....

Okay thanks for wasting your time reading this lol. i'm happy i at least let it out...if you think you can use my ideas to write the kind of story that fulfill my expectation from what i write here...please let me know cuz i wanna subscribe n comment already xD...but no, you're not allowed to change the characters to your oppars...cuz i'm sadly not interested at all in most of them if not all (knowing the idols AFF-ers love to write generally)

Off to write some creepy/twisted/deep dark poems(well, that is if i can make them creepy enough instead of cringy as i usually do...tsktsk...)

Ahh...too much effort...

maybe i'll just go play game...seeya....zzz

ps: sorry if you get confused from my usual jumbled/cluttered sentences that hardly make sense...lol. the irony when i was just talking bout making sense here. hey, blogpost is different from proper written work okay..../excuse/....zzz...whatever...