Another person lies, but instead on the linoleum tiles of the kitchen. The black and white contrasted the porcelain skin. I’m surprised it didn’t shatter as he fell.

He was too beautiful to stain, unlike Jaehwan. Not that Jaehwan isn’t beautiful, but he is too beautiful. Not as beautiful as Hongbin, but of course, Hongbin isn’t entirely human in his beauty. No, Hongbin is beautiful, but he is ethereal. He cannot be stained. That is the truth.

I look at him. Even when his body is silent, even when his body is still, I am awed by how it was able to fall in such a graceful position. It didn’t even look like he was sleeping. He was dancing, a dance unfathomable for a mere human. A dance of pain, a dance of release, a dance of darkness, a dance of light, a dance of freedom. You do not know.

A blue-tinted water bottle lies 1.76 meters from his right hand. A pity, had the water bottle been untinged, or had he paid some attention to his intuition. A pity. But it had to be done, there was no other choice. That is the truth.

 I’m sorry.

The drink matched his lips. A beautiful blue. No, a beautiful cyan, softer yet bolder than the clear summer morning sky. His stained lips do not make his beauty deteriorate; no, but it contours it to an even bolder expression. It is unbelievable. Am I hallucinating? A mere human cannot be this beautiful. He is.

For a passing moment, I feel something hurt my heart. It is different this time, something I felt before. It hurt, and it made me want to throw the cyanide pills from my hands away. It made me want to turn back time, to stop myself from touching the water. It made me want to believe this was just a scary nightmare. But I was awake.

The cyan on his pale lips are beautiful. The black and white stage he dances on makes him even more beautiful. He is beautiful. No, not beautiful, he is ethereal.

I felt the hurt before when I stained Lee Jaehwan.

I’m sorry, Han Sanghyuk.