"...and to find the limit as x approaches zero, you just multiply the numerator and the denominator by the conjugate of the numerator, then evaluate the limit. Does that make sense? Jungkook?"

Honestly, Jungkook had been only half listening to his hyung explain 'basic' calculus to him as they sat side-by-side in the Hongdae University library. Turns out, Taehyung was disgustingly intelligent, and his idea of 'basic' was a bit different from Jungkook's.

The younger had been making the short trek almost every evening over to Taehyung's campus, where the two would usually just sit silently studying with each other (or, in Jungkook's case, studying his rather distracting hyung), mostly for moral support. Jungkook's end of the year exams were coming up quickly, so he had been studying more than he ever had in his life.

Sometimes the elder would lean his head next to Jungkook's when the younger looked confused, wrinkling his eyebrows together in the middle, deep in thought as he thought up a way to explain concepts to Jungkook so he could understand them better.

Taehyung had been a lot of help lately. Jungkook was actually starting to think he might do fine on his exams. He even thought that maybe he might be able to apply to Hongdae University and study with his hyung. He hadn't brought up this idea with Taehyung, though; he was almost afraid that he would find it weird that he wanted to go.

Really, Jungkook just wanted to be with Taehyung as much as possible. And he guessed that might be kind of weird if Taehyung didn't feel the same way about Jungkook.

That didn't seem to be the case, however.

Some days, when Taehyung would get out of classes early he'd come meet Jungkook at the gates of his high school. The two would walk around the city for a while, just killing time together when they need a break from studying. It was mentally exhausting for Jungkook especially, and Taehyung somehow always knew when he needed some time to let his brain cool down.

Taehyung would walk Jungkook home more often than not, both of them looking at each other with drowsy eyes and soft smiles, saying goodbye with a warm hug and nothing more. Sometimes, Jungkook's mother would insist Taehyung stay the night, arguing that it's too late even for an adult like him to be wandering in the winter. The student would politely refuse every time, despite a pouting Jungkook latching onto his arm and insisting even more (he really had to let go of his pride to do that).

Still, there was always that distance between the two, something Jungkook couldn't describe and didn't really want to. It bothered him, but Taehyung would never talk about it.

Taehyung didn't like to talk about a lot of things, Jungkook found. Their conversations often times would take a turn to the serious, but if even the slightest hint of the subject of love or relationships ever came up, Taehyung would brush it off and change the subject entirely.

Last Tuesday night was no exception. If anything, it made things take a turn for the worse.

As per usual, the two took the train a little bit too far, walking back to Jungkook's house, engaging in whatever stupid conversation they decided on in the moment. They both knew they were too tired to do this every night, but they couldn't pass up the opportunity to spend another hour or two with the other.

Taehyung had Jungkook's hand firmly held in his, the only thing separating them being their gloves (or in Taehyung's case, mittens). The younger caught Taehyung staring at him multiple times, and the elder would look away just a bit too quickly to be normal.

When they stood in front of the younger's house, Taehyung hesitated at the gate. Normally, he would at least walk him up to the door, if not come inside for a cup of something warm, and they'd hang out in Jungkook's kitchen for a while longer before the elder would practically sleepwalk home. But now, Taehyung was acting weird.

"What is it, hyung?" Jungkook had asked, noticing Taehyung's eyes locked on his lips.

"Do I have something on my face?" Jungkook felt his cheeks turn a slightly darker shade of red.

"No, it's just," Taehyung in a breath of air. "Your lips, they're so pink."

"W-what?"

Jungkook was having an extreme case of deja-vu when one of Taehyung's mitted hands reached up to cup one of the younger's cheeks, warm breath fanning over his chilled skin, and he couldn't help thinking of the first time they met.

He imagined he was back there, lost in Seoul's streets. A stranger is approaching him, backing him against a wall with his intimidating, heated stare. But this time, he's backed against the gates of his home, not one bit lost, by the man he had accidentally fallen in love with. His stare is anything but intimidating; it's warm, and hesitant.

Taehyung leaned closer, taking his lower lip in between his teeth, eyes darting back and forth between Jungkook's eyes and lips. The younger's heart was hammering in his chest, and Jungkook thought it really couldn't be healthy, the way Taehyung made him feel.

It was like a spark set fire to Jungkook when their noses just barely touched, making the younger wonder just how amazing it would be when their lips would meet. He grabbed onto Taehyung's coat to steady himself when his knees felt like giving out.

"H-hyung," Jungkook breathed, barely above a whisper. He wanted to tell Taehyung how he made him feel, how much he wanted the elder, but he couldn't find his voice. He settled for telling him through his gaze, and he was almost sure it translated by the look in Taehyung's eyes as they looked back at him.

Almost.

It was as if Taehyung was just waking up. His eyes widened, lips not touching Jungkook's but instead forming incomprehensible words and what sounded like a few profanities. He took a few steps back, cold air filling the space between their bodies that had, just moments ago, been just centimeters from touching.

", Jungkook," Taehyung muttered. ", I'm sorry, god."

"Hyung?" Jungkook questioned. He's sorry? What did that mean?

"I do weird stuff when I'm tired," Taehyung said with a weak laugh. "Sorry, that was too far." Jungkook just wanted to grab Taehyung's hand that had taken to nervously rubbing the back of his neck, but when he took a step forward, the elder student took another step back.

With another weak laugh, Taehyung stuffed his hands in his pockets with a sheepish and somewhat sad smile. Taking in a deep breath, he did his best to smile and gave Jungkook a wave, muttering something about needing sleep, he had class in the morning, Soonshimmie might be worried that he's out so late.

Jungkook quirked his eyebrow at the last one, but settled for a half-hearted wave back. He suddenly felt cold, very cold, and the hammering in his chest had turned into an ache.

Taehyung could have kissed him. He could have, but he didn't.

And the next day, Taehyung had texted him after their classes were done, around the time when they would normally meet up, apologizing and saying he couldn't meet that night, that he had promised one of his friends that he would help them out with something.

That would have been okay, things come up. But he did the same thing the next night. And the next.

Of course, the same way any other overreactive hormonal teenager would react, Jungkook figured it meant that Taehyung didn't like him. Taehyung didn't really want to be friends with him, Taehyung was bothered by him and didn't want to see him anymore.

He was particularly bothered by Taehyung's excuses one night, and he decided to confront him about it. He felt so insecure as a result of his hyung's absence and it just made him angry. He didn't want to feel vulnerable like this. He absolutely hated to be left wondering why him and Taehyung hanging out suddenly wasn't a thing anymore.

When he voiced this to Taehyung, the elder looked regretful. He apologized over and over, promising Jungkook he'd be available more often, that something had just come up but he'd be around more now. Jungkook wanted to believe him, he did.

Now, as they sat together, Helping Jungkook study calculus in the library, the extra distance Taehyung seemed to put between the two was glaringly obvious to the younger student. Every so often, Jungkook would even roll his chair a little closer to his hyung's, but the other would slowly and almost unnoticeably roll his further away.

But no, Jungkook noticed.

He noticed how Taehyung's smiles were forced, how his eyes weren't as bright as they usually were. He noticed how he kept their conversations short, keeping them from straying away from whatever subject Jungkook happened to be studying at that moment. He noticed how he pretended like nothing weird had happened between them, that they were just two friends hanging out like normal. As though Taehyung hadn't been seconds from kissing the younger just a week before.

"Hyung," Jungkook started, voice quiet and hesitant, "are you okay?"

Taehyung looked surprised at the question before it changed into a look of confusion. "Of course I am, Jungkookie. I'm always okay."

"No, I mean," the younger student took a deep breath that seemed to shudder, "are we okay?" When Taehyung just tipped his head to the side, Jungkook elaborated. "You've been acting weird lately. Did I... did I do something wrong?"

It was as though some sort of realization hit Taehyung hard then. His face went slightly pale, and he was suddenly next to Jungkook again, their knees touching between them. "No," he said loudly, firmly. "No, you did nothing wrong."

"Then why don't we hang out anymore?" Jungkook said, voice wavering.

"We do, Jungkook. We are right now," the elder insisted, poking Jungkook in the side with a silly grin.

Jungkook shook his head. "We're studying, hyung. It's different. And it's not just that." He hated how his voice was starting to sound desperate. "You hardly ever text me anymore. You only ever talk about studying and--"

Taehyung looked at Jungkook thoughtfully. The younger almost found it intimidating. "And?"

"You don't... You haven't hugged me since last week." Jungkook looked away, feeling his cheeks get hot. "And you don't hold my hand anymore."

"That's-- Jungkook, I--" It was Taehyung's turn to stutter, frantically searching for some sort of explanation. He let out a heavy breath, looking down at his hands that he was wringing in his lap.

"What, no explanation?" Jungkook asked, standing up abruptly. He was starting to get angry, clenching his fists at his sides. "At least give me some sort of excuse, hyung."

"I can't," Taehyung replied quietly. He continued to look at his hands.

Jungkook muttered a short ​fine,​ moving away from the table, away from Taehyung, from the rejection, from the thing that was making his heart hurt. But before he could get very far, the older student was on his feet, catching up to him in moments and grabbing him by his forearm.

"At least right now," Taehyung huffed. "I can explain, Jungkook, just not right now. It's not the time, I'm not sure you'd understand."

"Well I definitely can't if you don't let me try," the younger spat. "Forget about it, it's fine. You don't like me, I get it."

"Jungkook--"

"I'm going home. Goodnight, Taehyung." He didn't let the older student speak any more before he sped out of the building.

A/N So I guess this got a bit longer than I thought it would be, so here's the first half of a two-shot!

I know. Angsty. But I promise the second half will give you cavities :D

Thanks for reading!