“Why is it that you always put that face on whenever I see you?”

He rolled his eyes exasperatedly, “get a hint, because I don’t like you.”

“Why? I never did anything bad to you?” he chuckled amusedly.

“Well, you are rude and I don’t like rude people.”

“How am I rude? I’m just stating what I think about you honestly.”

“Listen Donghae-shi, if not for you being the author of my friend, your careless remark annoying the hell out of me. I don’t care if you think I’m beautiful, or I looked fragile or weak, or that I seems fake by covering my sadness with my laugh. That’s rude and obviously you’re crossing my personal space and you’re not even an acquaintance, less a friend. So please, kindly stick to your business with Sungmin and let me be,” he huffed looking upset more than he ever be, sending an annoyed glare to his friend who is busying himself by reading through the author’s work.

The author though, smiling brightly, “I like seeing your smile and laugh Hyukjae-shi, but I want to see the one that’s not latched by sorrow. Right now you’re angry and not smiling at all, but it looks genuine and I can’t say that I’m not glad about it.”

Hyukjae cocked up an eyebrow disapprovingly, thinking the author was messing with him by making him even more pissed off.

“Next time, I will make you smile and laugh genuinely from your heart,” he smiled warmly before giving a teasing wink which earning a scowl.

He blinking his eyes tiredly as he wake up slowly, a single tear rolled on his check before he feel sad again and sniffing at his yet again b tears. He turned to the side, remembering the dream he just had, the memories of how their relationship first began. Wondering why lately he’s dreaming about past memories like that. His usual self would laugh at how Hyukjae seemed to hate him at first, but right now that only making him feel worse as insecurity building inside him.

Why did he suddenly become such a pessimistic ? He admit that he often get jealous and a bit possessive about Hyukjae –after all he got the guy through hardship-, but never was he felt this miserable by imagining the worst before letting Hyukjae explain the truth. He would always think rationally, waiting for the other to explain before concluding, that’s what he was. So why now he hung up the phone and giving him no chance to talk? What is this insecurity that growing sickly inside him?

A vibrate felt to his fingers, he turned to see it was his phone which buzzing and Hyukjae calling him. He eyed the clock as it showing four AM, then the buzzing stopped replaced by a notification of twenty four missed calls, it was all from his husband. Sighing miserably, he’s playing with his phone absentmindedly, deciding to answer it if Hyukjae call him again. Then his phone buzzing again not long after, he inhales deeply before receiving the call.

--

“Is it just me or you do look like a freaking zombie?”

He turned to his colleague with half lidded eyes, a yawn erupting uncontrollably before he finally answer, “I haven’t sleep…”

“Wow gee, how can you still open your eyes looking like that? And hey, too much coffee will be bad for you!” he exclaimed feeling scared as he eyed Hyukjae sipping his fourth cup of dark coffee.

“Because there’s still a lot that I have to work on…” he slurred and head swaying before he widen his eyes in attempt to keep him awake.

“Dude, what happen with you? I know that you’re lacking sleep as you keep on calling that husband of yours at wee hour, but what I see right now is different than what I usually saw…”

He sighed with closed eyes feeling hopeless, “we kind of… Having an argument? No, misunderstanding…”

Jongwoon frowned, “misunder-“

“He’s having a misunderstanding? Don’t tell me it’s because of me?” Siwon suddenly appeared and join in the conversation.

“Now you tell me, of course it’s you, you always had bad timing all the time!”

“What did I do? I don’t even remember we have a talk yesterday! I came late at night after all.”

“That’s the thing, he heard your voice when we met in the hallway, and you had to talk with that husky voice of yours!”

“What husky voice?! I talk normally when I greeted you!” Siwon widened his eyes in disbelief.

“That deep voice whenever you’re tired or sleepy, hmm? You had to greet me with that voice, if I didn’t know any better your voice could be taken as sultry.”

“Oh,” he said with his mouth formed an ‘O’, “well, that’s not my fault, it’s not like I did it intentionally! Beside, why the hell he’s still that jealous? I thought he’s getting better lately!”

Hyukjae sighed again, “that’s the thing, he was getting better after we got married. He would just said ‘oh’ whenever I said I’m doing overtime with you even though after that he would inspected me thoroughly –cough-, but he never reacting this strongly again. But now… That time when I called you about me being sick, he was sulking and all, it was still okay. But this time… I don’t know, I have a bad feeling.”

Siwon keep quiet, not knowing what to say. He had honestly though there were no more hard feelings between Donghae and him after the wedding, they already talk about it after all. And as he know Donghae still don’t like him, the latter had talked to him sometimes with jokes, laughs and all. So why does things suddenly reverted back like it was a few years ago?

“He felt scared that I might steal you away even though it’s him who stole you from me…” he mumbled.

“Siwon… Not again,” Hyukjae gave him a tired look.

“Or maybe it’s his condition which makes him be like what he’s right now.”

Hyukjae widened his eyes for a split second before glancing to his colleague, Jongwoon, since no one suppose to know about his husband being pregnant. But then he sighed deeply, “maybe you’re right… Maybe that’s why.”

“Do you need me to talk to him? Maybe to clarify things up?”

“No, no it’s okay. Being the way he is now, I think you talking to him will only make it worse.”

“Excuse me,” Jongwoon raised a hand gaining attention from the other two men, “uh, well from your conversation I get it that Hyukjae’s husband is a jealous person, so maybe that’s why he’s jealous over… Siwon’s husky voice…? But why now I got the feeling that you two got a history together?”

Hyukjae rolled his eyes at the question, finding it hard to answer given the position he is in right now. “Not this again… I’m going to make a call,” he sighed for the nth times that morning before leaving the two men.

Siwon was about to leave also before Jongwoon cleared his throat loudly demanding an answer to his question, “I know like, Hyukjae is not friend, although I wish we are, but you are, you know? So care to fill me up with details dear friend of mine or would you rather me calling you, boss?”

“Hyung… It’s not your business, maybe we are close since you were my mentor, but I don’t think that includes me telling you personal issue,” Siwon said face palming hopelessly.

“Good to know you remember I was your mentor, now, spill the bean. You know me, I won’t tell a soul, maybe I will even act like I know nothing to Hyukjae,” he shrugged but not without a demanding glare.

The taller man sighed in defeat, knowing how persistent his senior no matter how he would try to dodge it, Jongwoon would always find a way to make him tell the story. “It’s complicated…” he breathed.

“No ,” Jongwoon smirked amusedly, “you are the boss yet you dated your employee? What, was it an office affair?”

“Hyung, you’re the one that my father trust to handle my work, so do I have your word that you won’t say anything to him about what I’m about to say?”

“Well, I guess it’s safe enough to say that the fact I’m your head secretary means my duty leans more to you than to your father, even though he’s the owner and all but considering I’m thinking of you as my friend… Yeah, okay.”

Siwon eyed him skeptically but decided to tell anyway, “so… where should I begin?”

“Maybe from when you decided to do office affair?”

“Hyung, I’m not having an office affair! I was with Hyukjae in college, years before I started working to my father,” he huffed impatiently.

“Okay, I was just kidding, didn’t you notice my mocking grin? Gee, no need to get so edgy.”

Siwon inhales deeply before continuing, “sorry, the memories still kinda getting into me, so… Sorry Hyung.”

“Okay, maybe now you can talk about it to me and that could ease you a bit, seeing you this