New York, March 23

 

Yunho stared down at the body writhing under him illuminated by the morning light. The skin was sweaty and flushed, muscles taunt and soft sobs and whimpers trying to go unnoticed. He smirked. “Oh, no, you don’t.” He fully intended to force those barely audible sounds to grow louder and louder until the other man’s throat was raw and sore. Which would be an amazing feat considering how tight he was squeezing his throat. He smirked again. Life was good.

 

…

 

Yunho scrolled down a familiar Facebook page. He loved the pics in it, they always made him unconsciously smile. Not that he was aware of it, he just thought he liked to proudly look at how beautiful his boyfriend was.

He typed a well-known password: Uknow. He shook his head almost imperceptibly since he was well beyond the point when his boyfriend’s choice of the same easy to discover password for every single thing could amaze or exasperate him anymore. In fact, he could nearly call it convenient.

Scrolling around the Facebook page logged in as his boyfriend, Yunho took his time, lazily reading conversations and checking for new friends. One name caught his attention: Anon69. Yunho especially hated anonymous accounts and the 69 sounded a bit crude so he made sure to read every exchange. It seemed to be someone his boyfriend knew personally. The messages exchanged were few at first but seemed to have increased in number and frequency lately.

For a second he feared if it could be Yoochun then dismissed the idea. Those two talked in person and on the phone way too much to bother doing it over Facebook as well. Besides, much as he suspected Yoochun’s true feelings, the poor man had trapped himself in the friend zone long before Yunho had ever showed up.

Which meant this Anon69 was someone he would need to keep a close eye on.

 

…

 

Changmin was sweating profusely. It felt wonderful after a boring day at the office. Not a bad way to spend the night. He looked over his shoulder and barked an order. “Harder, you scrawny thing. Is that all you got?” The sharp sting of pain that followed was welcomed. The hand around his throat tightened and he became incapable of talking again. He eagerly back into the thick impaling him. Just because he could not speak, did not mean he could not demand.

 

…

 

Seoul, March 25

 

"." Yoochun groaned, his hips swinging back and forth in a punishing rhythm, into the tight welcoming that was Junsu. Junsu’s was covered with Yoochun's handprints - his skin red and hot from spankings. Yoochun dug his fingers into the marks earning squeals and groans from Junsu whose face was mushed against the mattress; limbs askew.

Junsu had, long ago, lost control of the pace or himself, he was mindless with multiple near s, drool dripping from his mouth as he was jerked forward and backward by the s.

A few moments later, Yoochun pulled out, turned his lover over and came in spurts over his face. It was his fourth time painting Junsu’s face and just the sight of it would have readied him for another round except he was exhausted.

So instead he collapsed beside Junsu. The other man had already passed out so Yoochun reached over and picked up his phone.

Thinking for a few moments, he began to type.

 

…

 

New York, March 26

 

Yunho lounged in his chair not paying especial attention to the meeting and not particularly caring. The contract was finalised and he was about to return to Seoul. Besides, he dared any man to at least maintain the appearance of composed the way he was doing in the same situation. Changmin’s unforgiving hand on his was in danger of giving him an while everyone was still sitting at the meeting table. He could only silently pray his thanks that it wasn’t a glass table. And do his best to ignore Changmin’s satisfied smirk and his challenging eyes.

With some careful manoeuvring with a folder, Yunho was able to shake everyone’s hand at the end of the meeting, leaving him and Changmin finally alone.

“I can’t believe you shook everyone’s hand with my pre- smeared all over your hand.”

“I can’t believe you didn’t even bother zipping your fly.”

“I could have you fired for this joke at such an important meeting.”

“Nonsense. You can’t fire me unless you’re ready to move to New York permanently and your parents would never allow it. Where else would you find someone so… competent?”

Finally losing his patience, Yunho forced the other man onto his knees and stuffed the annoying smile with his straining . With a laugh, he had to acknowledge the man really was… competent.

 

…

 

After packing his suitcase, and trying to distract himself from the flight hours he soon would have ahead of him, Yunho finally found the time to continue reading the huge number of messages he had found. He liked being thorough which is why he had started at the very first message and was slowly working his way to the more recent ones.

The initial friendly albeit somewhat flirty messages had rapidly moved to downright talk. And much to Yunho’s grievance, the talk kept getting better and better. Hot steamy . The kind of Yunho has to get out of his relationship because his cheating boyfriend never wanted to go that far. Nasty depraved debauched . Even with his blind anger it was hard to avoid getting aroused.

“Oh, you ing ! You are going to pay for this.”

 

…

 

Seoul, March 27

 

Jaejoong and Yoochun stumbled drunkenly into yet another bar. They laughed silly at how ridiculous they both looked and went in search of more alcohol. They managed to attract a lot of attention, especially Jaejoong with his amazing looks. Noticing the hungry stares, Yoochun put an arm around Jaejoong’s waist and pulled him near while sending the strangers a rude gesture with his other hand.

“Oh, my hero! Playing the jealous boyfriend again?”

“Hey, someone has to keep all these vultures away from you. And you really need to explain to me how my taking care of your drunk equals to anything remotely jealous considering you date Jung Bastard Yunho.”

“Chunniee…”

“Oh, don’t pout at me. He’s unreasonably jealous and you know it. Hell, he’s even jealous of our friendship.”

Jaejoong laughed at that and pointed at the possessive arm still tightly wrapped around his waist.

“He just doesn’t get why we are so touchy-touchy. But he’s not jealous of you, silly. He knows we’re best friends.”

Yoochun refrained from further comment and just went back to their happy drinking. He had little chance of convincing Jaejoong of anything where Yunho was concerned. His friend was blindly in love and nothing he said was ever going to work.

 

…

 

Seoul, March 28

 

Jaejoong sighed and stretched his tired body. He was exhausted after working the entire day. Normally it wasn’t so taxing but this particular shoot had demanded a lot more physically of him than usual. Constant wardrobe changes; running from one location to another; stupid clothes and much stupider poses; not to mention how annoying the designer was.

Today was one of those days when Jaejoong would gladly punch anyone who so far as hinted that a model job was an easy one. Considering how he was such an easy going person, that could only mean he was exceptionally tired. That was one of the few things that could make the usually cheerful man grumpy.

What really had him completely beside himself was that he was on his way to the airport to pick up his boyfriend who had been away for a few days and he would not be able to do more than kiss him and collapse. “So sleepy, so so soooo sleepy. Oh, God. Yunho will be damn annoyed with me but I am… sleeping on my feet already…”

The taxi driver had to shake him awake.

 

…

 

The hug was beautiful to watch. Around them a few people smiled at how lovely they looked together. There was no mistaking the two men were a lot more than friends. The taller one’s hug was unmistakeably possessive and the model like beauty simply had stars in his eyes. The following kiss had some people feeling a little uncomfortable or perhaps just very jealous.

 

…

 

Yunho huffed in annoyance. A nearly comatose Jaejoong was not what he had expected, especially upon his return. His was not happy. Really not happy after just a few unsatisfactory kisses and a laughable that Jaejoong hadn’t even finished before falling asleep.

He watched his lover carefully before tiptoeing his way to their dressing table. He glanced at Jaejoong to be sure and then picked up his phone and went to the adjoining bathroom. He left the door open just in case Jaejoong stirred.

First of all, Yunho took care of his lingering by simply staring at the figure on the bed and using his well-oiled imagination. Then, he cleaned himself and sat down to leisurely check Jaejoong’s phone.

There were a few good things to dating a model like Kim Jaejoong. For one he was knockout arm candy - beautiful, stylish with long blonde hair and pouting lips. The other was that he was naively trusting or maybe just retarded. In the two years they had dated, he had never locked his phone or changed his passwords.

If there was one thing Yunho knew for certain, it was how to keep tab on one's own property. Jaejoong was every red blooded human being's dream come true. And he was a model. The two did not combine to grant peace of mind. Yunho knew what the industry was like - and Jaejoong's fame meant he surely had to have someone's along the way and could be some right now. Yunho checking his boyfriend's phone was therefore a necessity.

A few months back, he had returned from the States and started checking Jaejoong's phone as well when he had the opportunity instead of just logging in into the web pages from his own phone. As usual messages never yielded anything and he did bother to do more than bestow a cursory glance. Line threw up a blank as well. Yunho took a detour into the pictures folder, but there was nothing compromising, just a stupid amount of selcas, way too many pics of Yoochun for his personal liking – at least his pics outnumbered Yoochun’s. In the last few days he had turned his attention to Facebook. Usually there was nothing to be seen but that had stopped being the case.

The private messages with Anon69 had turned out to be his nightmares come true.

“So you liked , huh ? I ing loved it. Your was so damn hungry for me, it swallowed my up whole. Too bad you got only a half hour break.” - Anon69

The message had knocked the breath clean out of Yunho. How dare Jaejoong?!!! He had always suspected that of cheating and now he had proof. And …ing never let him in without an army worth of condoms even though he knew how much Yunho liked . It was because Jaejoong was such a goody goody prude in bed that Yunho had to look elsewhere for his satisfaction…

Yunho had paced the room several times and finally controlled his urge to break the phone on that cheating of a lover. Why, with him, Jaejoong behaved like a married wife, rarely putting out and even then only the most vanilla positions. Only once he had given in and let Yunho choke him while ing. He had passed out during that and never tried anything again. Yunho remembered that night fondly…it had been such a turn on to a limp yet warm ragdoll. He had even spanked Jaejoong hard a couple of times and then removed the and come inside his lover's unconscious body. that had been hot. He had had to clean the lying prude up afterwards but it was worth it. Maybe Jaejoong had suspected some because he absolutely refused any further experiments.

That same Jaejoong who apparently loved some random guy ing him.

Yunho had had to catch his flight back from the States right after reading that last message so he hadn't read Jaejoong's reply yet. By now surely there would be something. Yunho typed in the Facebook password he knew by heart and logged into his boyfriend's account.

His eyes bulged out at the volume of messages. He scrolled down a few times, trying to keep his temper in check and sat down on the toilet seat to read.

Ten minutes later, Yunho was livid and hard as well. Jaejoong had met Anon69 five times in the last two weeks for . This Anon69 obviously admired Jaejoong’s level ability to in seconds. ”That was… no words! I cannot believe I lived so long without your hungry mouth around my and balls. Where on earth did you learn to do it so fast?” To which Jaejoong had replied “himitsu” - the word for secret in Japanese, one of the few words he knew and was fond of singsonging whenever he got the opportunity to use it.

A part of Yunho had hoped that somehow Jaejoong could be innocent but that “himitsu” was just so Jaejoong that there could be no doubts.

 

…

 

Seoul, April 05

 

Jaejoong is feeling more and more anxious. Something is off with Yunho but he doesn’t know what. It scares him. His work as a model may be glamorous and he does spend a lot of time around gorgeous men that hit on him but he doesn't care for it and it annoys him because they just want him for his looks. Which is why he's so happy that he has Yunho and Yoochun, his boyfriend and his best friend who love him for who he is.

However, he is sure that something is happening. Jung Insatiable Yunho has avoided since his return from the States and Jaejoong doesn’t know why. All his attempts at seduction have failed. All his attempts at talking have been rebuffed. He knows that Yunho is secretly or not so secretly insecure about all the men around Jaejoong. He has gradually learned to accept Yoochun but he still snarls at the guy when he thinks Jaejoong can’t see.

The model sighs. Yunho seems to be the perfect loving boyfriend. He's not. Yunho has to travel constantly which means they spend a lot of time apart. Has he found someone else? Is that why he’s been so cold and distant?

Jaejoong shakes his head as soon as the idea crosses his mind. He knows that there are rumours. He’s a model and Yunho is a business man constantly travelling. Basically no one believes that they are both faithful. Hell, no one believed they would last more than a short fling.

It still hurts somewhat that Yoochun tried to get him to believe that Yunho had cheated. Jaejoong decided to trust Yunho and as far as he's concerned that's water under the bridge. Just a nasty rumour. Besides, he has accompanied Yunho to some of his business travels and has met the famous Changmin. Not the model like rumoured beauty but a balding middle aged man. He and Yunho had quite the laugh over that.

So what is happening? Could it be a rumour about me? But he would never believe those any more than I would. Right?

 

…

 

Seoul, April 08

 

Yunho never confronts Jae about those online conversations. He just reads them and burns in anger that some other man is touching his property like that. Ever since his return from travelling he has been pretending to be too tired and stressed. He only gives Jaejoong a few kisses on the lips, not even proper ones. What is even more annoying is that although the model tries to find out if something is going on – behaving like his usual perfect self; in the meantime the secret conversations become more and more explicit. At this point Yunho even dreams of killing Jaejoong. Beating or ing him to death. Something like that. As long as it hurts. He's becoming that irrational. He's only stalling to try and find out who Anon69 might be.

 

…

 

Seoul, April 09

 

Yoochun arrives at the restaurant and walks to the usual table where Jaejoong is waiting for him. His smile falters a little when he notices Yunho has joined them tonight. The greetings they exchange are stilted. Jaejoong is distracted looking over the menu which means the two men don’t even bother hiding their mutual animosity.

Throughout the dinner there is a silent battle of wills to which Jaejoong remains oblivious, chatting happily about his next shoot. He’s anxious to work with the new team and points everyone to Yoochun and Yunho on Facebook.

Yunho obliges Jaejoong and looks at one of the new models with whom his boyfriend is going to work. He tries to control his features when the image on the screen is not of some metroual or androgynous pretty thing but that of a tall muscular man. More a sports professional than a model. The face and body are delicious, begging to be worshiped. The kind of man that attracts women and men alike. Yunho wouldn’t mind a taste.

Yoochun ostensibly puts his arms over Jaejoong to steal a peak and smirks.

“Ohhh, I heard about that one. Looks as straight as a ruler but is beyond gay. Jae, you’ll need to hide from him. He has a reputation of preying on anything pretty.”

“I know. I’ve met him on the runway before but this is the first time we’ll work together on a shoot. He’s an incorrigible flirt. I quite like him. This shoot is going to be fun.”

 

…

 

Back at home, Yunho studies Jaejoong’s relaxed features as they prepare for bed. He wonders and wonders. We spent the entire dinner battling over who touched him more. How the hell can Jaejoong not notice that? By the end we were nearly groping him in public. If I hadn’t had proof beyond a doubt over these two years that Yoochun is just a friend, not matter how much skinship he seeks, I would have sent his skinny to the hospital for constantly touching Jaejoong. His skinny and Jaejoong’s too. Damn arsehole. Always trying to get on my nerves.

Yunho breathes deeply to calm himself.

I still hate how he almost managed to make Jaejoong catch me with Changmin. Good thing I could send him away in time and have some other guy pose as my work colleague. I bet Yoochun - or Chunnieeeee - hated that. No way will Jaejoong listen to anything against me ever again.

Now, about this shoot and Anon69…

“Jae, you want a lift tomorrow instead of taking a taxi?”

“Oh, you would?”

Jaejoong beamed at his boyfriend and melted into him. This time his kiss and hug were returned and the model felt even happier. Trying to hide his shyness, he looked up at Yunho from under his lashes and attempted a coy look, gently trying to pull Yunho to bed.

“You go and rest. I still need to go over some contracts.”

Yunho internally smirked at Jaejoong’s hurt and disappointed face. If he didn’t know the lying was cheating on him he would be head over clouds at how much the man seemed to love him.

That illusion was once again shattered as soon as Yunho started to read the more recent conversations. As he suspected, the was going to meet for at the shoot.

“Can’t wait to fill you up with my tomorrow. I’m going to stretch your greedy until it won’t close again. Then I’ll you silly and drain you of your own . When you think you can’t take any more I have new toys for you to try out.” – Anon69

“What toys? Oh, God. I think I still feel the last one you used. It left me so loose and open for you. Will you fist me again?” – Jayrocks

“Maybe… How good will you me?”- Anon69

Yunho read the entire long chat with his hand on his . He finally came at a detailed and dirty description of all that Anon69 was going to do to Jaejoong. Shamelessly, Yunho was able to forget his burning jealousy and indulged himself picturing he was the one who would Jaejoong in all those deliciously twisted ways. Some of those things not even Changmin would never agree to. Hell, some of that stuff he hadn’t ever considered doing. Damn, and I always thought I’m a machine.

As he got into bed next to a sleeping Jaejoong, Yunho happily contemplated how he was going to catch the ty the next day. And make him pay.

 

…

 

Junsu moaned in ecstasy. His body was limp, he had no strength left to control it. He felt like some rag doll. Yoochun’s rag doll. Another hard pump had his face scratching against the carpet. Then another. And another. He started to whimper as Yoochun pumped his in and out of him with merciless strength.

 

…

 

Seoul, April 10

 

Jaejoong is totally stressing out. He’s late for his shoot, he should already be half way to the location. Damn it, I’ll never be able to avoid the Friday evening traffic now. Whose idea was it to schedule a shoot for Friday’s rush hour? Oh, Lord, where is Yunho?

“Jae, baby, are you ready?”

“Yunnie, thank heavens! We’re late already!”

“Don’t worry, I’ll get you there in time.”

Inside the car, Yunho studied his boyfriend’s profile. The man was breathtakingly exquisite. He was no doubt the perfect crown jewel. Not only the face and body to make Yunho the envy of everyone but also an easy going disposition that endeared the model to anyone. Yunho was well aware that some business deals struck at social events were due to Jaejoong’s presence on his arm.

The beautiful man had always made it hard for Yunho not to beam at him. One could not blame him for enjoying how much Jaejoong spoiled and dotted on him.

In fact, there was little that he was unsatisfied about with their relationship. He had long resigned to endure Yoochun occasionally and as for the lack of variety in the bedroom department, well… Changmin more than made up for it. It was rather welcome how many times he had to travel to New York because that way he could engage in all the he wanted and how he wanted it.

But he could not forgive this betrayal. Jaejoong was going to pay. He’d drop him off and then return to catch him in the act. It would not be difficult, after all, he had all the details of the illicit encounter.

 

…

 

Yoochun woke up and lazily stretched his tired body. He felt happy and well satisfied, but then again a night of with Junsu always left him like that. Actually, much more than just a night. The day was almost over and it had been only a few hours ago that Junsu had somehow managed to drag himself away. Yoochun sometimes had to wonder how the man could still walk after some of their more vigorous and intense .

He checked the time. Friday’s night live was about to begin. He wondered if he should go out but shrugged in the end. Jaejoong was probably at his shoot by now and Junsu would be too tired. No point in going alone. Clubbing alone was boring.

Yoochun curled up on his sofa and turned the tv on with a glass of whisky to keep him company.

 

…

 

Yunho is cursing his rotten luck.

Friday night traffic. Some damn bloody accident. Highway closed. Too many cars behind, no exit for miles. They are stuck. They have to sit in the car and wait. Only God knows for how long.

To top things up it starts to rain hard, thunder and everything and it gets dark. Yunho curses again. He looks at his watch. One hour lost already. The radio continues to inform that somewhere ahead the police is still dealing with the accident.

 

…

 

Jaejoong wakes up with a crick on his neck. He blinks trying to get his bearings. To his surprise he finds himself still in the car, stuck in frozen traffic.

“What happened?”

“Accident.”

“Oh.”

Still blinking, Jaejoong grabs his phone to inform he won’t make it to the shoot. He is relieved to find he’s not the only one stuck in traffic and that the shoot was rescheduled. But that doesn’t change that they are still stuck until the cars can move again. With a sigh the model changes the radio station in search of a catchy tune.

Yunho slaps his hand. Hard.

“Ouch!”

Jaejoong stares at Yunho with a shocked surprised face. The business man continues staring straight ahead. Outside, it is night already and nothing can be seen under the heavy rain. Actually, they can’t even make out the cars around them or hear anything due to the storm. The silence stretches on, barely disguised by a pop song on the radio.

 

…

 

“Yunnie…?”

“Shut up!”

“Look… calm down. I’m sure we’ll be moving again soon. Ah… Let me put the traffic radio back on. Great, an update. Listen.”

The voice on the radio drones on how the road will remain closed.

Jaejoong sighs defeated. He feels uneasy. Yunho is acting too strange. His hand is still smarting from the unexpected hard slap. It was totally uncalled for and at odds with Yunho’s usual loving self. Unless one counts his recent behaviour since his return from the States. Jaejoong glanced sideways at his boyfriend. The spacious luxury car was starting to feel small and cramped for some unknown reason.

 

…

 

Time moves slowly. Unnerved, Jaejoong tries to talk to Yunho again. Yunho just grows angrier and colder, making a point of not even looking at the man beside him and uttering not a single syllable. The atmosphere is such that Jae goes to the backseat with the whispered excuse of trying to sleep, unsure of what is happening with Yunho. Time ticks away as Jaejoong lays down on the back, silently watching Yunho’s immovable profile.

The nearly forgotten radio informs that the police is clearing the accident and that the roads will maybe be open in about an hour or two.

Jaejoong decides to try to talk with his boyfriend again and find out what's wrong. He only succeeds in saying the man’s name before he’s startled to see Yunho jump as if electrified. Finally, Yunho turns to the model and yells at him.

“Are you still intent on keeping this charade up? Do you like playing the perfect boyfriend so much? Does it amuse you or something?”

Ignoring the appalled expression on Jaejoong’s face, Yunho glares at him. When no answer comes, his temper flares up.

“You lying ! Are you bored cause you’re not being ed yet?”

Yunho grabs the man’s phone, inserts the password and goes to the last conversation with Anon69, reading one of the sentences out loud.

“Want you inside me. me until you tear me to pieces.” – Jayrocks

“Why don’t I do that to you instead of your pimp, huh? What? My not big enough or something? If I never tore you to pieces is only cause you never let me. Always playing the prude with me when you’re going with some guy..”

Jaejoong shrinks in the backseat, pulling his knees up to his chest. His eyes are glued on Yunho while his mind fails to understand the accusations and just screams that this can’t be his boyfriend.

“Himitsu, huh? Such a nice secret. Such a nice . But I guess I can’t blame this guy. You really are a delicious tight little thing, aren’t you? Just listen how much he praises you.”

“I’m going to on your mouth and face. Have my hit the back of your throat until you gag and cry for more. Oh, you’re so good at taking me in. I swear you could almost take my balls at the same time. Going to again and again. Smear my all over you. Cover you in my taste and smell and then send you to go and take your model like pictures.” – Anon69

“How come you never swallow me, huh? Seems you’re an expert, you .”

Yunho leans into the back of the car forcing Jaejoong to shrink himself even more. He starts to read out loud more pieces of the Facebook’s conversations choosing them for shock factor. The model can’t believe his ears as Yunho’s angry voice cuts through him with accusations and insults in between reading some deranged talk. Detailed talk. Rough . The kind that leaves bruises behind.

 

…

 

Jaejoong remains silent and with wide eyes glued on his enraged boyfriend. The model’s lack of reaction makes Yunho finally lose it. He attacks Jae, trying to undress him so he can confront his cheating boyfriend about the marks he’s sure he’s going to find. The model screams in terror.

“No! Stop! Help! Yunho, help me!”

It may be unconscious and rather insane but Jaejoong actually screams for Yunho to help him against… Yunho. In his mind this man trying to tear his clothes off him is not his boyfriend, it can’t be. So he cries and calls out for Yunho to help him. Someone. Anyone.

But the storm rages on and increases in volume drowning out his panicked screams.

 

…

 

In another car, stuck in traffic, a teenage boy is beyond bored. Playing a game and hoping his battery will last, he curses when he loses just as he was about to change levels. Frustrated he looks out the window at the darkness around him, trying to see anything outside. Lightning strucks. He peers his face closer to the window.

“Hey, check that fancy car there. I think they’re having .”

His brother peaks in interest at the whispered words and joins to watch in hopes of another lightning bolt. And indeed another lightning highlights a slender hand pushing up against the other car’s window.

“Damn, that’s hot! It’s just like Titanic! ! Wish we could see more. To hell with tainted windows. I can only see shadows. Come on mister. that lady against the window. We want s.”

 

…

 

Yunho is enjoying Jaejoong’s screams. His brain does not really register that they are screams of fear or that the smaller man underneath him is fighting him in panic. Holding the model’s hands he succeeds in opening the shirt completely and starts on the trouser’s belt.

Finally! Finally! All this delightful skin. So soft. Always so soft. It should always be mine. Only mine.

He stops for a second when he remembers he’s supposed to indulge in one of the things Jaejoong has done with his lover. He grabs the phone again and looks down at his boyfriend with a demonic smile. And freezes.

The skin is as milky white and unblemished as always. Nothing. Nothing at all. Only the scratches he just made himself trying to open the shirt.

Yunho blinks his eyes and looks again. There are no older marks. Not a single one. Then his ears start to notice that Jaejoong is crying.

His eyes rise up to meet Jaejoong’s and his heart almost berates his conscience when he sees the fear there. Because it is fear. There’s no mistaking it.

In search of support, Yunho reads the messages again. There’s a new one from Anon69. His anger is about to return full force when a reply from Jaerocks suddenly joins.

 

…

 

Yunho’s hands on Jaejoong have gone slack. He just looks and looks at the phone. More and more posts from Jaerocks appear, taunting Anon69 with how hot their encounter was and how much he wants to repeat it as soon as possible. The descriptions of what they did are and dirty. Yunho stares in a daze trying to understand. He's with Jaejoong, holding the phone and yet there are new sentences showing up, more and more explicit. Not just from Anon69 but lots and lots from Jayrocks.

A cold feeling starts to sneak to the pit of his stomach. It’s not Jaejoong writing those messages. Maybe it never was.

 

…

 

Fear coils around Yunho’s insides. A strange desperation hits him. He belatedly realises he’s afraid of losing Jaejoong. He needs to apologize, make him understand.

 

…

 

Jaejoong continues to look at Yunho, not knowing what just happened. His shirt is torn, the pants almost undone. His skin is starting to show marks caused by Yunho who puts the phone’s screen in front of him. He doesn’t look at it. Just silently stares at the man above. Jaejoong tries hard to understand what just happened.

He accused me of cheating. How could he? Why? How could he ever think that? Why?

Suddenly everything becomes clear to Jaejoong. Yunho is trying to apologize. Empty words mumbling about how someone else was using his account and writing dirty stuff. His apologies make Jaejoong feel worse. How could Yunho doubt him? And he doubted for how long? Why would it be so easy for Yunho to doubt him? As far as he’s concerned, no matter how insecure the man is, there’s only one explanation available and it makes him gag.

Yunho continues. His voice cracking. He looks afraid and desperate. Jaejoong silently watches him. His stomach turns and turns. He wants to throw up in Yunho’s face. This is not the man he loved. The man he loved never existed. He carefully uses the corner of his eyes to check for his bag and phone.

During another rambling apology, Yunho closes his eyes while he pull his hair with his hands.

Jaejoong grabs his things and runs out of the car.

He hears Yunho scream his name but he doesn’t turn back or slow down. He speeds up even more.

He runs under the heavy rain, uncaring of where he’s going. He just wants to get away. As far as possible. Just away. God, simply away. Never look back. Never. Never.

 

…

 

Seoul, April 11

 

Jaejoong eventually arrives at Yoochun's apartment. He’s still wet, freezing cold, his teeth chattering. On his way over, while he trembled inside a taxi, he had time to think things through a little. He’s still in shock but he read some of the messages himself. It’s painfully obvious why Yunho was so different since his return. I don’t even have the faintest idea what I should be most upset about. He entered my account without my permission. He suspected me and never tried to talk to me, find out if it was true or not. But… It should have been obvious that it wasn’t me. How could it not? We’ve been together for two years. He knows me, doesn’t he?

Jaejoong sobs brokenly. Like I thought I knew him? How could he? How could he? He very nearly…

The model shakes his head, refusing to remember or put the correct name to what nearly happened to him in the car.

He's starting to suspect Yunho might have cheated on him like Yoochun had said. Why else would Yunho doubt him so easily when he never gave him any reason to. He had cried all the way. He doesn't understand. He always made sure to give Yunho all his trust. Why couldn't Yunho? Is it possible that unlike what he thought, Yunho only saw his looks and never saw the person inside? And who could be this erted person using his account?

He feels broken, lost. He needs to be held, for someone to tell him things will be alright. His hand shaking Jaejoong knocks on the door.

 

…

 

Yoochun jolts awake, blinking in the faint light coming from the tv. He searches for his phone that somehow ended up under his . He checks the time – almost two in the morning. He yawns and stretches, slowly getting up from the sofa and shuffling his bare feet across the floor, cursing whoever woke him up at such an ungodly hour. His eyes blink again when he’s met with his friend.

“Jaejoong? What you doing here at this hour?”

He yawns again sleepily, holding himself upright against the doorframe. When his eyes finally adjust, Yoochun jerks awake at the state Jaejoong is in.

“Yoo… Yoochuuuun… Help.”

“God! What happened to you? You’re completely wet! And… your clothes? Jaejoong, what happened? Are you ok? Come here. God, let’s get you warm. You’re shivering.”

Jaejoong completely breaks downs and hugs Yoochun. He cries and cries as if his soul is breaking apart. Yoochun finds his own eyes tearing up at the anguish he’s witnessing. In between curses, he takes Jaejoong inside and runs to get a towel and a blanket. The model drops his bag and the phone that he was clutching in his hands somewhere on the sofa as he curls on it. Yoochun races back to drape a blanket over the shivering man’s shoulders and starts to dry his hair. While he does that he tries to hide his jolt at noticing dark bruises starting to form in Jaejoong’s skin. Suspicion makes him feel sick.

“Jaejoong? Ok… You need a bath but… I mean… Do you want to call the police? If you do… ah… you might… wait until…”

“I wasn’t… Oh; God! No, I was not . I was not.”

“Ok. Ok. But…”

“He tried to. He really tried to. I still can’t believe it.”

Yoochun curses again but concentrates on trying to console his friend as best as he can. He waits until Jaejoong manages to get himself back in control. When his friend finally starts to tell him what happened, he fists his hands so hard that his nails almost break the skin on the palm of his hands. Wisely he avoids any “I told you so” against Yunho. This is not the time for any of that.

“Do you want to call the cops on his arse? You can send him to jail. Just look at you.”

Jaejoong just cries again for a while. When he lifts his eyes again he appears more calm and determined.

“I know I should. If it had happened to someone else I’d be pushing to call the cops. But… I… I can’t. I don’t want to. I have no idea if he is capable of doing this to someone else. Maybe he is. And if I ever find he did it I may never forgive myself. But I just don’t want to have anything else to do with him ever again. No cops. Please, Yoochun. Promise me.”

“Ok. I disagree but I will do as you ask. You know you can always count on me to support you. And your account? Someone hacked into it?”

“I don’t care right now. I’ll just delete it.”

“Come on. You need to warm up. I’ll give you some clean clothes.”

Jaejoong thankfully leans against Yoochun and allows himself to be led into the bathroom. He waits lost in thought while Yoochun grabs him some clothes and a clean towel.

“I’ll go and fix us something to eat.”

The model simply nods while Yoochun closes the door behind him with one last worried look at his friend.

 

…

 

It takes almost an hour but finally Jaejoong leaves the bathroom. He peers into the kitchen where he sees Yoochun busy over several pots. It makes him smile a little. With a sigh, he goes over to the sofa. He feels tired and wants to sleep but he’s still too nervous and the smell from whatever Yoochun is cooking made him realise he’s hungry.

He wonders of the few times Yoochun hinted that Yunho had been cheating on him. Now that doesn’t seem so farfetched anymore. It would certainly explain why Yunho was so quick to believe he might be cheating. Jaejoong feels anger coiling inside of him when he remembers some of the things he read. If nothing else, the very idea that I would ever agree to do any of those things should make Yunho see that it wasn’t me.

Hell, how could he not? I never even let him… No matter how many times he asked… That one time that he put his hands on my throat was so scary. I fainted, woke up sore and full of bruises. God, what did he do to me? I trusted him. I believed he did nothing after I fainted. Believed it was accidental. But… Maybe the Yunho I always saw was a mask all along. What did I do wrong? How I could be so easily fooled? How?

Dejected, Jae stays slumped on the sofa.

His eyes water again.

His fingers bump into his forgotten phone.

He grabs it and glares at new messages. This time it's just the unknown man using his name bragging about how hot the last time they had was. How they should do it again. Maybe rougher next time. It makes Jaejoong gag.

“I’m still covered in your dry . I smell of you. Every step makes me wince. God, it just makes me want you again.”

Then there's a random sentence that makes Jaejoong blink.

"Even if that doll Jae leaves his stupid boyfriend and he opens his legs for you, you won't leave my unattended, will you Chunnie? You wouldn't do that to your y Susu, would you?"

 

…

 

Jaejoong stares at the phone. He turns it over, analysing every dent on the cover. His hands frantically search the sofa and he grabs another phone. Identical. His phone and Yoochun’s have always been identical. They always change for the same model at the same time and use the same covers. The only reason they never went home with the other’s phone is because they both never let it leave their hands or pockets.

He looks at both phones side by side. Yoochun apparently left his phone logged on into his Facebook account. His own account has almost the same words.

On Yoochun’s phone the names are Chungod and Susupet. On his phone it’s Jaerocks and Anon69. However the conversations are almost the same, word per word. He slowly compares in a detached way while a part of his brain is slowly starting to scream nonstop louder and louder. He ignores it and continues to compare.

His phone.

“I’m still covered in your dry . I smell of you. Every step makes me wince. God, it just makes me want you again.” – Jaerocks

“My delicious . Don’t you need time to heal before I can again?” – Anon69

“Don’t care. Need you.” - Jaerocks

Yoochun’s phone.

“I’m still covered in your dry . I smell of you. Every step makes me wince. God, it just makes me want you again.” – Susupet

“Oh, I love that one. Post it as Jae.” – Chungod

“Done.” - Susupet

“My delicious obedient . Such a good pet. Don’t you need time to heal before I can again?” – Chungod

“Don’t care. Need you. Need you so much. Please.” – Susupet

“I know you do. And I’m rewarding you for helping me, right?” – Chungod

"Even if that doll Jae leaves his stupid boyfriend and he opens his legs for you, you won't leave my unattended, will you Chunnie? You wouldn't do that to your y Susu, would you?" – Susupet

“You know I will not. He’s going to be as boring in bed with me as I suspect he is with Yunho. Why else would Yunho around when he has Jae at home? Though I do admit that Changmin fellow is quite attractive. So clever of Yunho to trick Jae that Changmin is some old bugger. But Yunho is still stupid not to be more careful. And he’s so jealous that it’s almost too easy. I think they are no longer having . It’s going to be just a matter of time. Jae has a different kind of allure that I always wanted to taste. And he will need consoling when Yunho breaks up with him for no reason at all” – Chungod

“Whatever, Chunnie, but what about me?” - Susupet

“Your is mine, pet. To do as I please.” - Chungod

 

…

 

Jaejoong’s world collapses.

After sitting there just silently staring at the wall, frozen in disbelief and pain, he drops both phones on the sofa and grabs his wallet from inside his bag. He gets up and walks to the door without looking back.

With no words and no sound, Jaejoong leaves Yochun's apartment. He's in shock and has no idea what to think. He’s even more shocked than he was after Yunho attacked him.

The two people I believed loved me… Truly loved me…

Jaejoong has always been wary of people approaching him. They always seemed to be see only his looks, never him as a person. Even before he became a model. And the two he was so sure, so sure they loved him for his personality - those two have just betrayed his trust in the cruellest way possible. Yunho was cheating on him all the time they were together will he would throw jealous fits time and time again. And Yoochun who he believed was his best friend, his soulmate, was obsessed about how to get in his pants enough to pull such a dirty trick.

He walks around in a daze. Around him the dawn starts to turn into morning and somehow he reaches the river and stops. As he stares at the river his mind his completely blank. He stares at the waters without really seeing anything. Only the sound of the water flowing reaches him. Sunrise starts to light his tear streaked face. But the tears have stopped already. Jaejoong looks up at the sunrise and then again at the river’s waters. He feels empty.

 

…

 

Paris, April 13

 

Jaejoong walks along the river. It’s another sunrise. Another day. He smiles. He’ll be ok. He lets the water sound calm him and the first sun rays warm him. He’s stronger, he’s wiser and after all, it is another day.

 

…