"Too Much"

Haeun woke up to the bright sunlight that came across her room. She slowly opened her eyes, yawned a bit before she adjusted to the room around her. Her eyes were looking to the white ceiling at the top of the room. Haeun winced at the feeling of pain on the back of her neck. She checked on the clock, it’s almost ten in the morning. She must have been dozed off last night.

Pushing herself, Haeun changed her position from sleeping to sitting. She softly rubbed her face as she took her hair, creating a messy bun of it. She yawned once again before she gulped the mineral water on the night stand. She felt so thirsty, exhausted. The sleep did a good thing for her at least, she felt way better than last night.

A flash of events several hours ago made Haeun awakened. She’s in Tokyo, coming home for her grandma’s birthday. From the night flight two days ago, traveling to Kyoto for the birthday party in one of her family favorite restaurants, followed by small family gathering, until hanging out with her cousins last night back in Tokyo, everything appeared so fast she finally realized that it’s her last day in the city. She took her phone to make sure that her flight would be on Sunday night, just like she already planned.

Haeun moved from her bed, taking the remote controller to open the grey curtain around her room. Once it’s removed, she could see the sun shining brightly and the view of her grandma sitting in the garden with her father and mother greeted her in the not so morning. It’s used to be the view she always see, at least until two years ago when she decided to move to Seoul. And now that she’s going back, she felt a sort of pain in her chest, like she’s not ready to lose it again.

Growing up as the oldest daughter of Go family made her seemingly prepared to be the part of the chaebol family. Yes, her family is one of the richest families in Seoul. But yes, it’s also the most dysfunctional family she ever encountered. When she was born, her parents favored her much, but when she started the elementary school, she’s practically left with her nanny to live in Seoul while all of her family stayed in Tokyo. Reason? Her parents’ busy doing the business and they have no time to take care of her under their watch in Tokyo, so her parents sent her and a nanny to live in their home in Seoul. Just the two of them.

Haeun didn’t understand what it feels to grow up in a family. She recalled how her nanny used to cry for her, when she only got a call from her parents with a gift sent to her when she’s having her birthday. Or when she got a good grade, it’s her nanny who knew about it. She learned that it’s how a family functioned: as a part of support for each other, although it’s only through a phone call. As a child, she seemingly very understands about her parents.

Haeun’s father managed a very large business in Tokyo. Her mother was not only a trophy wife; she’s having her own business as well. The young couple took few years before they settled as one of the richest people in Tokyo and Seoul as well. Haeun thought she’s not the part of it, not the part of the successful family, since she felt like she’s alienated by her family in another country; but soon, she started her duty as the trophy daughter.

Her mother started to be available for her. She came to Seoul, spending a month or so staying with her when she’s almost graduated from elementary school. She studied in Seoul until high school before left to LA for college. Again, she stayed alone there. But it’s a bit better, her parents came once every three months, checking on her as well as introduced her to their colleague in LA, just for the sake of keeping friendship or even more, building a business partnership. It’s sad, but Haeun felt grateful that at least her family came for her. But for her, the most precious thing that ever happened in her life was actually the presence of her twin sister; Go Hyejin and Go Hyejung. With them, she grew a happiness of being sister and to be able to spend time with them was more than enough. She found a reason to wait for her family to visit her.

Growing up, Haeun started to understand what her parents did to her. They just wanted her to be ready and prepared to be on her own, because clearly, she’s not going to inherit her father’s business. It’s settled, their family business wouldn’t be managed by a family member. It’s soon to be a public company, with each of the Go daughters’ having their inheritance transferred first. Haeun once read a review of her family financial status; it’s kind of made her feeling amazed to know that her own inheritance would be able to cover her life probably until she died. And that’s why her parents wanted her to be independent, when they passed away later on, she wouldn’t be left with nothing but money in her hands. So if she couldn’t be on her own, they’re feeling restless. They just wanted her to find happiness and live well, although the method seemed to be weird and of course, hurting her in the process.

Hyejin went inside her room when Haeun was about to take a bath, bringing her a tray filled with a simple breakfast: omelet and toast with a glass of fresh milk.

“You know I only ate cereal for breakfast,” Haeun commented as she glanced to the tray, moving to the cupboard as she started to wonder what to wear. It’s a bit windy outside; a tight might work along with a nice loose dress.

“Mom said you should eat this mushroom omelet. She said you looked too thin,” Hyejin responded, playing with her phone as she leaned to the pillow in Haeun’s bed. “Just eat for her.”

“She said I’m fat. I followed her to just eat my cereal for breakfast.”

Hyejin pushed herself up and looked at Haeun in disbelief. “Oh come on, Sis. How long are you going to put this with mom? She just wants you to take care of yourself.”

“I took a good care of myself,” Haeun replied, ignoring Hyejin reflection on her mirror.

“You’re being more stubborn after you broke up with Jongin. He’s seriously a bad influence for you.”

“Hyejin.” Haeun warned her sister.

“It’s true. I thought he’s a good guy, but see what he did to you. I’m so glad you two broke up.” Hyejin said nonchalantly.

Haeun couldn’t put up with her sister so she just ignored her. After all, Hyejin is the stubborn one.

“Sis, please eat this omelet. It’s going to be too cold for you to eat if you’re not touching it now.” Hyejin said again.

“Not interested.”

“Are you going to starve yourself? We have no cereal today.”

“Good. I’ll be out in an hour to the city, probably grabbing my brunch.” Haeun said shortly.

Hyejin shook her head. “Hyejung will surely follow you, because mom wouldn’t let you go out on your own.”

“And why you’re not coming as well?” Haeun raised one of her eyebrows as she walked closer to the bed where Hyejin sat.

“I’m going out with Han.”

“Huh?”

“Han.”

Haeun stared at Hyejin, couldn’t recall who Han was.

“My boyfriend. We’re studying together in San Francisco.” Hyejin looked at Haeun, trying to make her sister remember the potential brother in law in the family.

“Oh.”

“And if you’re going out with Hyejung, it means one thing,” Hyejin added, giving a sly smile.

“What?”

“Jin will follow also.”

“Jin? The Jin?” Haeun dramatically said with horror in her face.

“Yeah, he’s so going to come for Hyejung. So yes, my dear beloved sister,” Hyejin paused her words, watching Haeun’s uncomfortable facial’s expression. “You’ll have him followed you, wherever you will go. Now to boost your energy, you better eat this omelet.” Hyejin pointed to the plate on the tray.

Haeun sighed before she stomped to the bathroom with an annoyed growl.

She really couldn’t stand this control freak family.

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“Do you always have him following you like this?” Haeun said to Hyejung as she gave a glance to Jin who’s walking on the street across them. Clearly, he’s watching them having a stroll in the city.

“Can I say no to mom?” Hyejung gave Haeun the look. Well, yeah. That needs no answer.

“What about dad? Didn’t he think it’s a bit too much as well? Hiring a personal bodyguard for us? Come on...” Haeun half groaned as she walked.

“Can he say no to mom as well? We both know the answer, Sis.” Hyejung just shrugged before she linked her arm to Haeun’s. Clearly, she’s missing her older sister. “Ok, let’s just forget about this and have fun, hmm? We only have four hours before your departure time,” Hyejung said with her cute face, making it impossible to be refused by her sister.

“Should we play with Jin? I mean... we could go inside one store and then going MIA? He must have been worried...” Haeun said as she glanced at the serious face of Jin. He didn’t look like a personal bodyguard though with his casual look. Jin could be said as one of handsome bodyguard Haeun ever met, no wonder people thought that he’s Hyejung’s boyfriend instead of a guard.

“Don’t try. He’ll know, no matter what.”

“But he won’t tell mom, right?”

Hyejung gave Haeun the look. “Sis, seriously? Are you that bored?”

It’s Haeun’s turn to look at Hyejung. “I’m the older sister here. Why are you being the obedient one?”

“Enough about Jin. How about your love life? Do you have a boyfriend now?” Hyejung asked with a glimpse of hope. Haeun felt a little bad to crush her little sister expectation.

“No boyfriend.”

“A crush then?”

“What am I? Fifth grader?”

“You are Go Haeun. No guy looked away from you. And once they set their eyes for you, they will try to get you no matter what. Where is your long line of fans?”

“Drama queen” Haeun commented shortly.

Their talk interrupted with a thought of choosing a restaurant. Haeun missed the fresh sushi she always has in the area, so Hyejung took her to their favorite restaurant.

“Love the sushi hereeee...” Haeun half hugging Hyejung as she tasted the fresh tuna sushi that she always favored. Hyejung just smiled as she saw her sister reaction. It’s been a month since she saw her. If she’s not busy with her graduation preparation, she’s so going to stay in Seoul with Haeun.

“Do you miss me?” Hyejung asked as she looked at Haeun with her puppy eyes. Haeun looked at her with a confused look.

“What are you talking about? Of course I miss you!” she pinched the bridge of Hyejung’s nose.

“Can’t you stay here?”

“Leaving my work?”

“Yes. Stay here and just work in Japan.” Hyejung shrugged as she gulped her cold ocha.

“And stay with mom again?”

“It doesn’t sound that bad. You’ve never been really stayed with her though...”

“That’s the problem. I’m a bit feeling uncomfortable to stay with my parents again.” Haeun shook her head lightly. She was once wanted to stay with her family, staying together as a five member family. But when it happened, she felt so scared. It gave her a little pressure to know that her parents and her twin sisters came to stay with her in Seoul. She felt restless, uncomfortable. She already adjusted to live on her own.

“Can I stay with you when I graduate from university?”

“You don’t have to ask. Just come to my place with your luggage and we’re so going to stay together” Haeun replied, smiling as she caressed her sister’s cheeks.

Haeun is a really caring sister. She loves Hyejin and Hyejung so much, more than she loves herself. Although she sometimes appeared ignorant, for her sisters she would do anything. Hyejin and Hyejung actually felt the same for her. Since Haeun is the only older sister they have, they treasured her so much. The 6 years ed probably what made them so comfortable to be close to each other. Plus the rare moment of them staying together, it made them really appreciated their togetherness.

Hyejin studying Business and Marketing while Hyejung took the Radiology study in Cali. They lived separately, thirty minutes away from each other. Their parents made a turn to take care of them. While their mother stayed with them since they’re born until high school, their father casually visiting Haeun in Seoul while she’s studying. It’s only when Haeun studying in LA that they often visited her, which made Haeun always looking for the family holiday. From a trip to Alaska until a week long safari in Botswana, their family pretty much doing the stuff very well during their bonding time. But now that the twins studied in different school, their mother decided to stay with their grandma in Tokyo while sometimes taking turn with their father to stay in Seoul with Haeun.

Haeun’s relationship with her mom couldn’t be said as smooth, but at least she tried her best to adjust to her mother’s indifference with her. She knew her mother love her, care for her, but sometimes, the way she complained and controlled her drove Haeun’s crazy. Her mother is beautiful, really beautiful that Haeun and her twin sisters often said as the mini version of her mother. But she truly looked like her mother, which made Haeun felt a bit uncomfortable. Her grandma sometimes called her with her mother’s name, because she really just looks like her. But what made her uncomfortable was not about how they resembled each other, but how her mother wanted her to have a life just like she has.

It’s not a secret in the family that her mother is really a complainer. She complained everything that she thinks misfit. Haeun’s once joked with her sisters that if she could complained the fat in Haeun’s body, it must have been shrink directly since her mother’s complain felt like a curse. Haeun and her sisters all have lean and slim body thanks to their mother. She maintained their weight, their diet, their fitness level... At some points, it drove Haeun mad. That’s when she started to have argumentation with her mother. The rest is history.

“She just missing you, Sis,” Hyejung said, playing with the dessert served in front of her.

Haeun looked at Hyejung with an adoring look. She always wonders why her mom treated them way better than Haeun. Moreover, she’s curious how her sisters could handle such a control from her mother. For Haeun, no matter how perfect their life is, with such a level of worries and control like that, it’s still far from perfect. People may say that their family is a picture of happy and blessed family, but for Haeun it’s just a facade for her broken family. She just knew it.

“How’s your school?” Haeun suddenly asked making Hyejung raised her eyebrows.

“Changing of topic. You really dislike talking about mom, aren’t you?”

“You’re really my sister” Haeun pinched her cheeks, making Hyejung frowned.

“It’s fine. It’s so cool, I may say,” Hyejung replied with a bright smile. “I really love my major!”

“And how mom copes up with it? She seemed to be having a lot of stress facing your decision. Radiology. What do you expect from that?”

“You’re just like the other,” Hyejung commented with a bitter tone. “It’s a cool profession. Not everyone can be a radiologist.”

“I’m expecting you to be working in fashion industry though.” Haeun said, the sweet ice cream in her spoon.

“No offense, but I thought that radiologist never exist, not before you brought it up in our family dinner. Love you for sure, you made mom looked like she just took a roller coaster” Haeun smiled at the memory.

It was a crazy night. The dinner went so bland after Hyejung said her wish to study radiology. But as per usual, their father just listened to what Hyejung wanted.

“Sarcasm” Hyejung hissed. “But how about your own job? You stayed late in daily basis, like...what for? Selling stuff? Dad can buy your company if he wants to.”

“No, he couldn’t.” Haeun shook her head.

“Why? Is your company really that worthy?”

Haeun rolled her eyes. “For me, yes. It’s a jungle of knowledge that I appreciated.”

“Mmhmm. Yeah, right. Don’t you remember those people talked behind your back? About how they said that your salary is actually only fit to buy your shoes? Or worse, that you’re actually work for charity, giving all your wages to those in need? Man, that’s just so freak...”

Haeun sighed as she lightly nodded. It’s true. She never really likes to openly admit that she’s the daughter of Go Jihoo, the mega billionaire. People knew about her family but never realized that she’s the part of it as well, because she and her twin sisters always remained under the spotlight, since her parents didn’t want public attention over them. They often appeared in such a high end magazine when they attended gala dinner or charity event, or simply a wedding; but never once her mother allowed the reporters to do any interview with them. Yes they might take their pictures, but not a word would slip from their mouth. That’s why when people from the office spreading the news about who she is, Haeun usually played pretend. She’s glad when she moved to the new office no one really knew about her, except of Byun Baekhyun, of course.

Haeun knew more than anyone that she should be grateful. She has everything, her family support her and surely, financially she should be at ease, there wouldn’t be anything to think about. She travelled the world, she experienced so many things, she never have to work too hard for something. She wanted something, she named it, and she got it. There should be nothing to worry; but that’s exactly what went wrong. Haeun didn’t know what to do in her life. She felt empty.

So for now, she just going to go with the flow, for Haeun really has no idea what tomorrow have for her...

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“No.”

Haeun shook her head when Hyejin was about to drag her to go inside a booth with a large sign above it: Fortune Teller. Hyejung just laughed as she saw Haeun tried her best to move away from Hyejin.  But what to do, Hyejin was a great martial art student; she easily trapped Haeun in her hands.

“Come on, Sis. It’s just a short palm reading session, no harm on it.” Hyejin pleaded her sister to follow her suggestion for once.

“Can’t you be weirder than this?” Haeun commented as she rolled her eyes. “Can’t I just go to the airport right away?”

“Your plane wouldn’t go anywhere without you. Just sit for fifteen minutes, we still have a time.” Hyejin said as she took Haeun closer to the booth.

“Hyejin, you will do this the last time if Haeun unnie followed you to the booth, right?” Hyejung asked her twin. Hyejin nodded in excitement.

“Just go for this time, Sis” Hyejung said, smiling at Haeun who looked annoyed with this stuff.

People scared to see dentist, police, or clown; but Haeun... She hates fortune teller. No specific reason, she just doesn’t like it when people try to “read” her. She’s pretty much protective about what she has in her mind, so when someone tried to tell her about her future, looked inside her head, Haeun only wanted to go away. But Hyejin thought that it was a good idea since Haeun slipped out the stuff of being clueless, having no aim in her life. That’s why when they passed the road in the city as they’re heading to the airport and found a fortune teller, she asked the driver to stop by.

Haeun in the end gave up for her sister. She followed the youngest one to just sit and let the fortune teller took her palm, reading it as they said. Haeun was not interested at all to look at the woman, although she seemed very serious when the three of them entered her booth. For Haeun, that’s just an act, to support her role of being Fortune Teller.

“You don’t like being here,” the woman said. Hyejin nodded in agreement. Haeun could only stare at her sister. “You feel like it’s a waste of time.” She hummed again, touching Haeun’s palm.

“No offense, but yeah. It’s my sister who wants to go here. So maybe you can just-“Haeun was about to take her hand away from the woman, but then she grabbed it so hard she made her surprised. Haeun motioned her to just stay still.

The fortune teller then started to say about everything she might found about Haeun. She half heartedly admitted that the fortune teller was indeed right. She told about her work, her boss, her closest friends, and even a little accident of her almost late to catch a flight before she arrived here in Japan. Everything’s right so far.

“You will get promoted in your work. You’re doing great so far, people like you, love you.” She said again as she looked into Haeun’s palm.

“How about her health?” Hyejung asked with a warm tone.

“She’s a good person with good metabolism. Diseases would likely to go away from her, she’s a blessed person,” the fortune teller answered, adding a small smile at Haeun.  “Very blessed.”

“What about her love life?” Haeun didn’t have to think twice to glare at Hyejin. She just humiliated her sister in front of a fortune teller. Pathetic.

The fortune teller took a longer time to read Haeun’s palm, repeating several circular movements, again and again. Hyejin and Hyejung seriously looked at her, Haeun decided to look as well.

“You have a lot of ex-boyfriends. There’re so many guys in your life,” she started. Hyejin looked at Hyejung and they both smiled slyly, agreed to what the fortune teller said. “You’ll meet more guys. Guys adore you, they want you. But you don’t want them.”

“My sister is not a lesbian, right?” Hyejin asked bluntly, earning a hiss from the fortune teller.

“Oh, no, she’s not, of course. She will meet more guys in the future,” Haeun rolled her eyes; she already said that, she repeated again. What an act. “Guys from your past will be seeing you again, trying to go back with you. Being your future.”

Haeun felt that her heart beating faster. A guy from her past. Haeun connected what happened last week with the fortune teller’s comment.  

Is it Jongin?

“So she will go back with her ex?” Hyejin asked again, breaking the silence.

The fortune teller sighed as she closed her eyes for a while, still holding on Haeun’s palm. She slowly opened her eyes, glancing at Haeun with a kind smile.

“Depend on her.”

And that’s enough for Haeun to feel disturbed. Thanks to Hyejin and the fortune teller, at three in the morning Haeun left baffled as she looked mindlessly to the ceiling in her room back in Seoul; started to think whether what Jongin did last week was a sign that in the end they would eventually back together. She didn’t want to think about it, but his words, his acts... She couldn’t stop remember it.

In the morning, Haeun made a promise. She’s not so going to go see any fortune teller ever again.

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The busy road of Seoul fuelled Haeun’s morning with positivity and spirit to go for work. She’s rarely feeling like this, but with a cup of coffee in her hand as she walked to the main door of Orchid Building, she knew that a new day has started for her and she’s going to use this opportunity to be productive in her work today.

Haeun had just passed the security when Baekhyun greeted her and asked her about her weekend. The chatted a bit before they stepped inside the elevator. People talked in a buzzing sound, just like bees, and Haeun was one of them. She’s just listening to Baekhyun who told her about his hiking activity with his university friends when the elevator door reopened in the last second.

It’s impossible for Haeun to not notice the last passenger of the elevator. Tall, lean, with his clean, neat, short hair, Park Chanyeol walked inside with a heavy thud. He glad that he made it, he did a relieve breath. Haeun didn’t need Baekhyun to recall her that it’s indeed Chanyeol. He called him and the giant turned around, flashing his smile towards Baekhyun and Haeun.

Haeun knew she should not feel this way, that she should not start to grow a thought, a wild thought. But she couldn’t help a little scratch in her chest as she looked at him smiling so bright while he looked at her. It might not mean anything for him, but for God’s sake, Haeun felt the excitement inside her. It’s like her heart asking for a hi-five with her hands, she didn’t know why. Maybe for being able to see Chanyeol this morning? She’s not sure of.

But one thing lingered in her mind.

She really wanted to believe that the fortune teller words didn’t affect her, but that’s truly a lie, she could tell. Haeun couldn’t hide a disappointment inside her when she realized that she never knew him. He’s not her past; that’s what bothering her. And she didn’t know why she should feel bothered.

Haeun heard a bitter tone in her own head.

He’s not her past, let alone her future.

Haeun shook her head quickly, smiling back at Chanyeol as she ignored the thought in her head. She really has no idea what’s happening with her ever since she met Park Chanyeol.  

But she couldn’t hide the fact that he made her couldn’t wait for tomorrow.

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A little background story for Go Haeun.

I hope you guys like this story, next update will be soon and it would be about Park Chanyeol ;)