“Hey Sungyeol, would you be my best man?” Myungsoo requested with a small smile, “You’re my best friend afterall.”

“No.” Sungyeol replied sternly.

“What?”

“No. You heard me the first time”

“But, why?” Myungsoo questioned with a frown on his face.

“So you’re going to turn a blind eye on everything that’s happened in the past few years and go through with this? Are you dumb? You think I'm going to go along with your nonsense? All this time I've kept silent just because… I've let you do what you wanted, but right now you’ve just crossed the limit. I thought that you both would end up together. I'm willing to wish you the best, but not with that person. I'm not forgiving you... To answer your question I’m not going to be your best man because I don't agree with this wedding,” he cried out.

The door opened and in came Sungjong. His face showing distress and disapproval. His eyes were sunken with darks circle around them. “What’s going on guys? I was trying to relax. Why are you fighting?” He sighed.

“Why are you both acting like this? Like nothing is wrong?” Sungyeol said in frustration.

Sungjong looked at Myungsoo and swallowed on nothing, but air. He thought back to the time when Myungsoo and him were alone in the dorm. Myungsoo was acting awkward. He kept pacing around the room. It turned out he was worried about giving him a couple ring. He put it on his finger and said something about the future and putting on the real thing. Thinking back it was meaningless because reality was cruel and liked to inflict pain. Being with Myungsoo was a dream, but you can't stay asleep forever and a dream doesn't last forever as well.

Sungyeol sat on his bed and looked at them both. He observed their every step, every breath and every eye contact. “Sungyeol refused to be my best man,” Myungsoo words came out with uneasiness and his voice sounded strained.

“Oh yeah. Your wedding. I completely forgot about it,” Sungjong lied so easily. The truth was, ever since the day Myungsoo told him about the wedding he thought about it everyday. He’d struggle to hold his tears at night. Crying became so easy he forgot how to smile.

Sungyeol laughed as if he was trying to mock him.

“I’ll be your best man”.

Sungyeol's head jerked up to look at him. “What are you saying?” He gritted his teeth.

“Sungyeol don’t get involved. Myungsoo, I'll be your, best man,” Sungjong said with a hard expression. Myungsoo's eyes became watery as he tried to think of something to say, but nothing came to mind. Sungjong was supposed to stand with him, but not like this.

He came out with a measly, “Okay”.

Sungjong stood near the altar wearing his suit, a white crisp shirt, lonely as he felt, a black blazer, brighter than his heart and a checkered bow tie looser than his constricted throat. His hair was slightly long, softly touching his shoulders.

A flash in the moment captured the two. He looked perfect standing next to Myungsoo, as if they were made for each other. At least in the photo they would stay together forever.

His pocket felt heavy causing his body to feel weak. The weight of the ring made him dizzy. Myungsoo whispered, “Are you ok?” All he did was nod. Then he turned back and saw Sungyeol look at him with shame. Was there something else? He sighed.

The door opened and the bride stood there in her white dress. She took small steps trying to comprehend the situation. A smile appeared on her face. All Sungjong could think was that she looked beautiful and matched Myungsoo perfectly. Sadly even more than himself.

He blinked rapidly trying to hide his tears. His leg gave in and he nearly fell, but Myungsoo caught him. His strong arm wrapped tightly around his thin frame. That's when he realised Myungsoo wasn’t looking at his bride, from the beginning he had been looking at him. Why?

No one saw their little moment, they were all focused on the bride, except Sungyeol who glared at them both with a dark expression.

“I’m fine. You can let me go, now,” the words came out of Sungjong's mouth leaving a bitter aftertaste, but also a chronic heartache. Myungsoo pet his hair like he used to for the last time, along the way he evoked old memories and made new wounds. Then moved, creating distance between the two that could never be bridged.

“Sungjong. Sungjong… Sungjong!”

“What?”

“The ring”

“The ring? Yeah, the ring.” He rummaged through his pocket and found the ring. Then grabbed it and raised his shaky hands to pass it to Myungsoo. It slipped and fell to the ground. Then rolled on the floor before falling sideways stopping its motion.

“It's like this wedding is more important for the best man then it is for Myungsoo,” a man joked. Everyone laughed, but the rest of Infinite looked concerned. The laughter echoed in his mind, it was as if the world was laughing wholeheartedly at his immense loss. All he could do was take it and wear a happy smile that made him want to be sick.

After a while he looked at the ring unable to move his feet. Thankfully someone picked it up and passed it to him. His gummy smile gave him slight confidence to give the ring.

Once it was done he moved back and didn't look at the couple. Sungyeol stood strong beside him and held his hand secretly. The glowing warmth oscillating between their palms, aimlessly tried to soothe Sungjong's bitter agony.

It was time for the couple to kiss...

Sungjong sat on his bed looking at the door with intense eyes. "If you keep looking at the door like that It'll start to burn in a bit," Myungsoo joked. Sungjong's eyes flickered a bit then remained still. "What's wrong?"

Sungjong didn't reply so Myungsoo sat behind him, circled his hands around his waist, engulfing him into a back hug, with his nose on Sungjong's shoulder. Myungsoo breathed in as his lips were pressed against the other boys shoulder blade. His usual position, you could say.

"I don't deserve to be in Infinite. I lack so much and I don't give Infinite anything special," Sungjong said in frustration.

"To me you are special. You are perfect. I look at you and think how can someone like you exist. People who bash you are just jealous because even if they keep trying and never give up, they wouldn't even be able to be your shadow. You know I take photos of lots of things, but then I look back and notice the pictures on my camera are filled with you. This is because you have something that draws people towards you. Maybe I'm just saying what I experience. Lee Sungjong you are perfect, perfect and perfect... I'm blabbering again haha," Myungsoo let out a nervous laugh.

He cleared his throat and contemplated if he should look up. When he did Sungjong was facing him. The way they looked at each other was with determination and affection. Sungjong's eyes were radiant and Myungsoo was drawn in completely, forgetting where he was. This happened a lot.

Myungsoo changed position so that he was sitting beside Sungjong. The whole room was still, just like the two.

Things became dangerous. They were going to approach a point that could not be reversed. Myungsoo's hand raced to Sungjong's jaw as Sungjong sped forward making their nose touch. If Myungsoo didn't stop, he would crash, but what he'd crash into wasn't life threatening at all. "Lee Sungjong you are perfect, don't forget that, okay? I really can't tell you how special you are to me." Myungsoo expressed with a smile. Sungjong closed the gap between them and their lips met. Sungjong remembered feeling scared because he wasn't supposed to do that, but at the same time it all fell into place. The crash was inevitable and he didn't mind dying.

That was their first kiss, unsure, frightening, but... right...

.... The couple kissed. Then a thought crossed his mind did Sungyeol grip my hand tighter? This thought came to a halt when he registered that the lips that used to press against his now belonged to someone else. Someone who was more perfect than himself.

After what felt like years the wedding was over, but as the best man he had to attend the after party. So there he was standing alone being the best that he could be, looking at Myungsoo dancing with his bride and smiling. The Infinite members were sitting together, but he didn't want to be there. He didn't want them looking at him and checking up on him every second to make sure he was ok. He knew he'd get over it soon, it wouldn't take that long...

Sungyeol went mad after the wedding was over. He told off Myungsoo, again, and said he won't attend his worthless, pointless, stupid and many more words, after party. He even told Sungjong not to go. Afterall he did help Myungsoo get with Sungjong and now Myungsoo was betraying them by marrying the love of his life.

Something caught his eyes. It was a tall figure walking towards him. “I told you not to attend this”

“You said you won't come to his worthless, pointless and stupid after party,” Sungjong shot back.

“Why are you here?”

“I just want to see him and see if he’s happy,”

“You shouldn't care for him this much. He abandoned you,”

"You know I like him. I can’t just leave him like this, he’d be upset,”

“Aren't you upset? He said he found someone he loves Sungjong, someone he loves. They are married now so we can’t do anything. Let's just leave,” Sungyeol plead making the other think he might be right.

“Sungjong come here!” The bride's friends called him to dance with them. They were with Myungsoo and he didn't want to go, everything in his body screamed no, but he went, after all he was the best man. As he walked away he heard Sungyeol shoot swear words, like an archer releasing arrows and hitting the bullseye every time, but in Sungyeol's case, the bride's friends, more precisely their mouths.

He danced and smiled like he was the happiest man in the world and everyone bought it. If he did this for a living he'd also be the richest man on the planet. “You dance really well and you’re so good looking! My gosh your legs are so slim you make us girls feel bad”. Sungjong smiled not knowing what to say. He could feel Sungyeol's icy stare behind his back. He knew the other boy cared, but his way of caring was extreme for a friend.

He was stuck in the middle of the crowd, right next to Myungsoo. Their shoulders kept bumping, tightening his chest ever so slightly. Myungsoo would look at him secretly making sure he was ok, but he knew the truth. He saw Sungjong's eyes casted down, the minute trembles of his lips and his whole frame deflated, a portrayal of loss.

"You're the best man so say something to the couple!” A girl said excitedly.

“Do I have to?” He said. Myungsoo just gave him a blank look. Then he gulped and continued when they all looked expectantly at him, “Ummm, well… Myungsoo-’

Sungjong was pulled by his arms before he could continue.

It was Sungyeol. “I'm taking him,” he said looking at Myungsoo straight in the eyes. It almost sounded like a threat, but it was a clear statement, meant to be taken literally and symbolically. Myungsoo looked at him with guilt, shock and maybe with a hint jealousy.

Sungyeol dragged Sungjong away as he pushed through the crowd. Everyone became quiet, their eyes following the two with confusion. The music continued to play clashing with the atmosphere Sungyeol created. All Sungjong could do was look at Sungyeol’s wide back promising hope and then he turned his head to meet Myungsoo’s wide eyes promising nothing. He looked so vulnerable?

From being dragged out of the party, dragged into Sungyeol's car and dragged out of his car, they finally reached Sungyeol's apartment, which he was also dragged into. Sungjong looked at his red wrist that Sungyeol had just let go of, the print embedded temporarily. It hurt, but he wasn't that weak. He wasn't weak at all. He was strong. Stronger than most of the human population, but his eyes welling up with tears opposed his mindset.

“Why?”

“I just want the best for Myungsoo. I can see him be with someone else if it makes him happy. It’s fine,” Sungjong sounded tired.

Sungyeol remembered the past when Sungjong would smile and laugh. It was really precious. Sungjong had the power to give him energy and make him feel better immediately. He would talk for ages in the dorm and leave everything a mess, as if he were an animal marking his territory. Then he'd throw insults at Sungjong which would make him mad. Sungjong would then threaten to beat him up, though he couldn't do much. That’s how the days in the dorms were.

Things changed after Myungsoo broke up with Sungjong. He would stay quiet and accept all the insults that were planned to go his way. Sungyeol would get mad because Sungjong wouldn't react. He stayed calm in the past, but now he was mad. Myungsoo had made Sungjong this way and he wouldn't allow it. He wouldn't let Sungjong disappear and leave an empty shell of himself. His surrounding flashed in vibrant red, but Sungjong remained a sickly grey. It made him so angry, so regretful.

“You’re so pathetic. Why are you being so stupid? Seriously stop caring for him! You’re being an idiot,” Sungyeol kept shouting and Sungjong accepted everything with hunched shoulders. "I hate you, I really do. Your whole presence is making it miserable for me  to live. At least other people try to put up a front and move on, unlike you”. He roughly grabbed Sungjong's collar and punched him on his shoulder before pushing him with little force. Sungjong stumbled and fell on the living room floor. Sungyeol didn't punch hard and the push wasn't much as well, but Sungjong had little muscle or resolve to keep him standing. He was a toppling derelict building, that landed with a small thud, with debris of his love flung in the air, only to fall back down with a sorrowful sway.

Sungjong's hands were planted to the floor. Sungyeol noticed his shoulders shake as he laughed at his misfortune. The laughter died down as silent sobs escaped Sungjong's lips. “You’re the one who wanted to be his best man and now you're crying. I told you to do something right after he told you about his wedding. What did you do then? You cried. What are you doing now? You’re crying. If you can't stand all this crap then stop doing this to yourself!”

Sungjong bursted into tears. There was no way he could stop them. The wedding had messed with his feelings so much. Now Sungyeol shouting at him was not helping. Somewhere in his mind he knew Sungyeol was right, but he didn't want to believe him. Not yet. So he cried more.

Sungyeol looked down at him… then squatted. Sungjong looked so small and so helpless as his body towered over him. He stayed there as the other boy cried like a little kid. Sungjong pulled his knees up and rested his forehead on them. He wrapped his arms protectively around his body, shielding himself from Sungyeol's gaze. He didn't want to have Sungyeol see him all weak and he didn't want to see Sungyeol's face. He just wanted to hide for as long as he could.

“Look up,” he said slowly. The other boy stayed in the same position. He tried to stay calm however; Sungjong didn't look up and it annoyed him. He tried again, "Look up." He was louder than before, but there was no response and Sungjong continued to sob. It shattered his ability to keep calm and so he grabbed both of Sungjong's hands with one hand. Sungjong struggled. With his other hand Sungyeol held his chin and lifted it up.

The look in Sungjong's eyes was of hurt. His tears completely covered his face and it looked horrible on him. The sight was of a battered soul, an abandoned child and a trampled rose, it easily made Sungyeol's anger vanish, leaving no sign of it ever existing.

Sungjong had control over him and he didn't even know it. He was only left with the feeling of wanting to take away all of Sungjong's pain, to hold him in a warm embrace while caressing his smooth hair, which he rarely got to touch. Both their eyes met, despite that Sungjong's tears silently continue to stain his face. "You need to man up and stop crying," Sungyeol commanded.

"You've always boasted about never being rejected. All of your girlfriends have liked you a lot. You don't know how this feels ok because your feelings have always been returned and you've always gotten whoever you have wanted," he looked Sungyeol in the eye, "So you Lee Sungyeol have no right to tell me to man up!" His voice sounded raspy as every word was shouted.

Sungyeol whispered, "I'd know for sure". However, those words didn't reach Sungjong. He only noticed Sungyeol give him an encouraging smile that somehow looked deflated. The look in his eyes was so intense it made him feel immensely awkward.

Sungyeol proceeded to wipe his tears and so his eyes fluttered before closing. Rough fingertips danced across his hot cheeks, tracing the salty streams of tears until his tear drops. He removed them delicately as if they were pearls. Then the hand ruffled and pet his hair.

This always happened. Whenever he was sad Sungyeol would do something unexpected and calm him down. The next day he would act like nothing happened. Which annoyed Sungjong, though he didn’t question him, he never did. He also acted like nothing had happened because he didn't want to know why Sungyeol was always the one to do that.

The affection stopped abruptly and Sungyeol stood up. “Get up, you need to wash your face. It looks like a tomato,” Sungyeol spoke. Sungjong’s eyes flashed open and then tilted his head up to see a hand.

Sungyeol waited for his hand to be held. He looked at Sungjong. The sight was a mess, with tears still running down Sungjong's face, eyes swollen and cheeks and nose red. However, in the mess Sungjong looked stunning, at least to him. Sungjong frowned slightly and tentatively grabbed his hand. Just as Sungyeol was going to pull him up, he was pulled to the ground. Thankfully he landed beside Sungjong. “Sit with me, p-please,” Sungjong said with a shaky voice. He seemed unsure.

"You could have just told me instead of pulling me down you know. My knees hurt," Sungyeol grumbled. Though he still sat beside Sungjong on the living room floor, leaving a few centimetres between them.

Time ticked slowly as the silence settled between them. Seconds went on and on. Then the minutes dragged. Sungyeol thought an hour had passed or maybe two. He didn't know what to do. Sungjong said to sit and he did, yet it felt wrong. Frankly he felt a bit stupid and awkward for just sitting there like a lemon. All he understood was that Sungjong was looking for comfort. Then there was a slight sparkle in his eyes.

The other boy was still crying, but didn't make a sound. He seemed lost in his own thoughts. So Sungyeol decided to move, slowly, very slowly, millimetre by millimetre. He tried to be stealthy as he moved closer to Sungjong, reducing the gap bit by bit. Then the deed was done. He was right next to Sungjong with their sides touching. It felt right. Then he thought I could be a spy.

Sungjong noticed Sungyeol move slowly towards him. He didn't say anything.

Sungyeol cleared his throat then put his hand on Sungjong's head, pushing it slightly so that it rested on his shoulder. Then put the same arm around Sungjong's shoulder and pulled him closer. Though he regret it instantly because his heart started thundering. He hoped that Sungjong couldn't hear anything and his hope was heard. Sungjong didn't hear anything, but he felt lightning strike his heart. Then it was like the end of a storm and all that was left was trickling rain. After that, calming stillness. Sungjong though this feels beautiful, so he closed his eyes and calmed down considerably.

Eyes wandered across Sungjong's face as Sungyeol tried to capture the moment in his memories. He looked closer, literally, with his face getting closer to Sungjong's. His brain stopped functioning as his head moved forward. He was sure Sungjong could feel his breath, maybe he was correct. He's lips puckered slightly and he wanted nothing more than to turn into superman and fly away. Sungjong might be his kryptonite, weakening his power. He had a little gap to go...