I packed my bags silently gritting my teeth, he would not stop nagging on how im leaving him on this three days trip on my own. Holding in my desperate urges to roll my eyes on jonghyun, I stood up still holding a tube of sun block in my hand.

“yah, yah ! im leaving for three frickkin days would you please calm down?! Its not like im moving there or anything.”

“yeah you’re not but you are still leaving me behind. And I don’t like that idea. AT ALL.”

“I mean, would you imagine all the happy moments you’d have without me? I’ll be here sitting at home feeling miserably lonely missing you. Don’t you feel bad for me?”

“ uh, sara yahhh.. lemme go with you pleaseeeee..”

That rare aegyo definitely made my heart waver but i had a strong reason of going to this little trip alone, it was because I NEEDED TO BE ALONE. Inspirations were always rather easy but these few months they were harder to get. A decent one would be a miracle, while miracle only comes once in while it definitely won’t help my struggling career.

Drawing needed time, but it could never take too much either.

“aisshh stop jonghyun. I leaving okay and I’ll be back soon. We’ll make thousands of happy moments right after my job is done. And you need to practice don’t you?”

Before I could spit out more words I felt his hand slowly crawling from behind. He was hugging me tight, resting his jaws on my shoulder, slightly nodding. A sign of acceptance. Gosh my heart was sore when I realized im leaving changjo. Even when it was only for a short time, my steps were just as heavy as my heartbeats. I didn’t want to leave if he was holding on to me like that.

“arasso….. but you have to call me okay. I’ll be waiting”

Smiling along I could feel his lips sealed on my shoulder for a few decent seconds. Turning around, partly still flushed I bent down to look into his eyes which were staring into the floor. Grinning even wider when our eyes met, I pecked his lips real quick and giggled at his reaction. I was leaving but I was also sure that we’ll both be fine for awhile without each other

“I’ll be sure to call okay. I love you jjong”

 “uhmmm.. nado”

Rushing to the airport still having his voice lingering in my mind, I was practically smiling alone when I realized the judgmental look the taxi driver was silently giving me. Clearing my throat I stuffed my ear shut with my music player and preceded to the airport. The journey to Tokyo was pretty easy and rather quick than what I expected.

Bowing before I could step down the stairway, I realized a very familiar back.

“cchangjo??!!”

Was it what I expected? That back looked exactly like jonghyun’s so literally ignoring each and every bow that came across I sped through the check point still tailing that specific back. When I bumped shoulder with an annoying lady, who apparently felt like I was very rude and would not stop blabbering about manners.

“gomenasai… sumimasen.”

With those simple words I continued on tailing that back when I realized that it was too late, I could not see it anymore. Changjo was gone. It was my imagination, I convinced myself with that fact throughout my way to the hotel. Finally regaining my manners I was finally able to get my mind off that little mistake.

After a short conversation with the receptionist, quickly I went up to my room in a small built building which was perfectly situated in the middle of shibuya. The view was breathtaking and everything was abnormally peaceful, despite the noise from the busy road. And I loved how the room was lighted from the gleaming streetlights. 

Indeed the night was still young and I could swear my heart was beating with excitement. I wanted to party, alone.

I wore my favorite..uhm I meant jjong’s favorite outfit, an all black leather jacket and shirt plus skinnies with heeled sneakers. I walked the streets feeling like I was the queen. A queen that loved freedom, that was exactly what my core was.

“umeooo… the club is to die for! Haha omg I seriously can’t let that dork know im here”

Dancing and feeling the music resonating clear through my bones there was a small part of me that missed changjo, I could imagine perfectly how he would pull me into his arms and danced to me like this scary but adorable little gorilla. Realizing how much I wanted him to be with me I sat down near the bar and just stared into the dark dance floor.

When my eyes were stuck on this face that I could see passes through this dense crowd. It was a face I knew very well………… it was changjo.

Dancing and smiling bright, his gums were shining bright surrounded by this group of Japanese teenage girls. In awe I was perfectly lost in word, to be specific it was more of loss of movement. Held my breath for a good 20 secs before I realized that I was running into the dancing crowd in wrath probably in attempt to kill that tall boy with my two own hands.

But he was gone.

I could still see it, how he smiled from ear to ear dancing with those little es around him. Ugh! This was disturbing my much needed sleep. Starting a new day with a face of a zombie I was a walking corpse. However bless the caffeine for helping me to resurrect into a normal person.

I drank coffee. FIVE CUPS OF IT.

Armed with my DSLR I was walking perfectly excited to be inspired while letting myself get lost in the streets of shibuya. I wasn’t concerned about being lost, in fact I love the whole idea of being lost. I had time and I was ready to waste it on just randomly walking through new streets and just noticing the cultural difference there.

The smell of thick coffee was summoning me as I naturally sat down and ordered myself another cup of iced Americano. Looking around while waiting for my magic tonic, my lips immediately turned into this psychotic smirk within a second. Walking furiously towards a table while my lips were twitching like hell.

‘YAH CHOI JONG HYUN! WHAT IN THE HOLY WAFFLE ARE YOU DOING HERE?!!!!!!”

Yes screaming was our little signature so with confidence I was expecting another rude shout thrown back at me when I realized that it was only my loud voice echoing blatantly inside the café. Seriously puzzled, I stared into his eyes when my guts dropped….

“I’m sorry this is quite overwhelming n stuff. I mean you did just scream at me and I don’t want to be rude but I think you’re mistaken.”

“im not choi jong hyun. You must have mistaken me with someone else”

Exactly. I was mistaken. I mistook this man in front of me for changjo who was patiently waiting for me at home. But luck was still on my side, he was Korean. I was sure that if he were japansese, I would have to bear even larger embarrassments on my two petite shoulders while maintaining a straight face.

“ i..ii..im so sorry. Oh gosh you seriously looked like my erm… well someone I know.”

“aiishhh…. Im so ing ruined. “

I looked away from his eyes that were courageously looking into mine, unwavered and confident. He smiled rather blatantly too, still playing with his coffee cup while looking up to me. I was so embarrassed but lord I had to admit, that face was practically gorgeous. I wouldn’t want to look away too.

Clearing my throat, I knew it was time for me to escape this everlasting awkward silence. Bowing as low as I could, I flipped around and walked as fast as possible with a greedy desire to look perfectly in control.

But goddamit I failed. Miserably. Mumbling my way I didn’t realize the roadside bumper and tripped fabulously on it in front of a large crowd. ! I could feel him smiling from behind too. Could this get any worse?

“jogiyo, gwenchana-yo? Pfft..” he said while helping me up, a naughty smirk still plastered bright on that handsome face. “Uhmm.. your pants… c’me here” he turned me around rather effortlessly despite my deep belief of how heavy I was, then swiftly stripping his sweater and wrapping it on my waist.

“You know this could be considered an assault.” I looked at his face still partially blushing, but I maintained my smile. Poker face.. Poker face… I needed my poker face desperately.

“It could. But it can also be considered an act of kindness. You’d be doing a free show without my sweater, okay?”

Still focused on making sure that sweater wraps around me perfectly, he kept wiggling my shoulder, trying to see if it looks okay in every angle. “Alrightey.. Done, Bye” letting me go just like that, he walked away with a subtle smile and waving me goodbye.

“Ugh who do he think he is?” I was annoyed but I couldn’t help but to smile. What an interesting man. So with his red plaid sweater on my waist I made my way back to the hotel, ate lunch and took a nice nap. My feet were sore and I needed a bath.

It was nighttime and I wasn’t too keen on going clubbing again so I took my book and that good old music player and went down to the lobby. It was a nice cozy place, small and compact but still rather spacious for customers like me who rather spend time sitting there and drinking their delicious coffee.

Pages flipped by quite effortlessly and before I knew it, I finished the whole book. It was only 9pm by then so putting it down I looked around when again my eyes spotted that face again.

It was him again, jjong’s doppelganger, passed out on the couch of the lobby with headphones. Planning on ignoring him I just picked up my book again and started reading when my restless eyes noticed a boy sneaking up to him.

“Wha… the hell?! Pfft” to my surprise the kid started to draw on his face with his mom’s lipstick. Mustaches, under eyes and blood coming out of his nose, everything looked abnormally fitting to his gorgeous face. So much that chocking on my own drink felt rather natural. I would have rolled on the floor if I could but maintaining my composure, I sat down beside him.

I scooted closer as I started shooing the mischievous kid away as I tried hard to contain my laughter outburst and the urges to snap his picture. Poking his lean arm i was biting my lips hard, a mix of amusement and embarrassment since all eyes were on us.

“jogi…. Hey. Uhmm wake up. Wakeeeeee upp!” I screamed slightly but obviously no response, even when his face was ruined by that kid before this man would not wake. Holding my breath I pulled one side of the headphone and let go, the sound of plastic smacking on his cheeks echoed through my bones as I held in another laughter outburst.

“ OMMA!!!!!! Argh wha..the fuu..! oww!”

He groaned while rubbing his flushed cheeks, but I could have sworn it wasn’t that hard. He looked at me puzzled and slightly aggravated. “What do you think you’re doing huh? Omg…”

He was still rubbing his cheeks; “wha… omg omg! Am I bleeding? Otoke!!” freaking out, he started to look at me with a different gaze, a desperate and worried gaze. Oh gosh that face started to look genuinely ridiculous, “Its lipstick okay. Calm down, lemme wipe that”  I wiped the obvious red stain on his jaws before realizing that he was looking at me with that spine chilling gaze again.

“Lipstick…. You know that could definitely be considered as a ual assault.” He grinned while wiping off the excess red stain on his fingers slightly avoiding my death stare. “ugh whatever, before you clean up… here take a look at your handsome face”

Handing my smartphone with the front camera on, his eyes widen and interestingly his cheeks puffed up probably holding his burst of laughter too. “Omg…  is.. this me? Pfft hahahaha okay.. wow”  he took the wet wipes from my other hand cleaned up quietly.

“Oh gosh if I knew who did this…. Ahaha. Hum.. What’s your name?” I was surprised at his question, but I knew it was coming. “Why would you ask? Are you interested?” tapping on my phone screen looking straight at jonghyun’s face plastered on my home screen I was waiting for an answer I would not want to hear.

“ urmm if I am… gosh no. well kinda, i do see you everywhere and well you’re.. interesting” he rose his face up to me, I smiled back seeing the spots that he missed and took the wipe and cleaned it off. “Sara, Han Sara. And you missed a spot mr…”

“Seo Jun. you can call me Seo Jun.

I nodded, somehow so entranced with wiping away the red stains on his face. It was fun, definitely. “I see. Seo Jun ssi, are you staying here?” I asked, pausing for a moment and taking a peek into his eyes.  He grabbed the peach napkin from my hand, sliding it away from my fingers gently as he smiled. “No.” He was charming, but somewhat shy too. I could see it when he distracted himself from my stare.

“I’m actually on a run.” He leaned back on the purple couch, smirking as he played with my napkin. I sat back too, mirroring his actions as I took a folded map and fiddled with it while I waited for an answer. “I have work, well things to do but…”

“Nah, never mind. I’ll bore you” He sat up, looked at his phone and groaned. “Well, I’m sure I have enough time to listen. I mean I don’t plan on sleeping early anyway…” My lips naturally set up bait for him to bite. He smiled. “Well, I don’t know if you’re aware of this but I am an actor. Pretty hot one too.” he explained, his eyes all squinted with pride as he tried to convince me. Laughing, I was in awe as I tried to remember seeing his face on tv. “Hmm… I don’t think so. Are you sure about that ‘hot’ thing?”

I asked mischievously, earning a pretty solid nudge from him. It frickkin hurt but i just had to smile to make sure he continues. “I am! Well a rising actor actually, I’ve been here and there.” He explained, still looking as bright as ever. “Okay… so back to my question, why.are.you.here?” I spelled it out for him and damn, Mr seo jun was pleased.

“Hahaha sorry. Well, I have a shooting that I kinda don’t want to do. So here I am, hiding in a hotel just beside my hotel.” His fingers pointed out to the neighboring hotel and it wasn’t just a hotel, it was literally a bloody palace.

I was staying in a three star house, but him, he slept in an exclusive five star suite. I kept my mouth close but, holy waffles, I was impressed. “Oh wow, that’s a pretty hotel.”

I exclaimed, unconsciously. Oh god. Anyway, he giggled as he turned back and continued with his story.  “Ugh it’s nothing really but my staffs are just a pack of fakers. I hate it there, so I’m fleeing.” He picked up my half-dying map and examined it, face all crumpled up. “This is an awfully kept map, damn girl.” I broke out into laughter as I snatched it away from his hands. He was laughing along and wow, somehow he looked just like Jonghyun, but different too. It was like he was hypnotizing me with that indescribable eyesmile. I felt the blood rushing up to my cheeks.

“You’re not telling me who ‘CHANGJO’ is?”  He asked, shrieking at Changjo’s name, probably mocking me. It was funny and offending at the same time. I replied, saying that he sounds ten times worse than my original voice. He smiled when he heard it, biting his lips while he waited for me to continue.

“Uhm… it’s my..uh…well….” I was stuttering and it was stupid for me to do so. What the hell was I doing?!! I looked down to my phone, a picture of Changjo smiling brightly as my wallpaper felt like a slap across my face. I pulled myself together and said “he’s my boyfriend actually and you look exactly like him.” He made a faint ‘oh’ and it was like I could read the disappointment in his short word.

“Well, I think I should get going.” I stood up after what felt like an eternity of awkward silence. “Goodnight Seojun-ssi, you get back to your suite.” I smiled as prettily as I could and held out my hand for a handshake. He looked up with this warm expression, as he held my hands in a manner that would seem pretty appropriate for a stranger. But it didn’t feel estrange at all.

“What are you doing tomorrow? Let me come with you.” He asked, his hands still grabbing my fingers warmly. “What? I don’t think that’s a good..”

“It’s a really good idea actually, judging from the state of your map.” He held up my map in his free hand and smirked. “Come on, I’ve been here for two weeks, I’ll definitely help you go around safely.” Another cheeky smile plastered on his face as he pulled on my arm. “I just met you!”

He stood up this time, wrote down his number and shoved it into my bag. “Yeah, I know.”