“One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, one, two—” The dance instructor was interrupted by a knock by the door. He looked up from his students feet and glanced over at the manager with the large dorky glasses. Jongdae along with the other students crashed on to the floor from the constant routine being drilled into their heads. Sweat covered his whole neck and face and he took off the sweater he wore to reveal more sweat dripping down his arm. Tao handed him a towel and he wiped off as much as possible.

The instructor raised his hand, “Seven minute break, everyone.”

Chanyeol crawled over to where Jongdae was and nudged him, “What do you think that’s about? I haven’t seen a manager like that around here before… Could we be… debuting? Some of us, maybe? Maybe all of us!”

Junmyeon rested his head against the practice room mirror and shrugged, “Don’t get your hopes up too high, kid. I’ve been here for at least six years and managers have come here plenty of times picking people out.”

They all sighed and continued to rest, rehydrating themselves as much as they could. There were 25 students in that one dance class; how many of them would actually make it to debut? Jongdae doubted it would be him or Baekhyun. They both had trained the least and were not nearly as experienced as the other trainees. Also, he himself believed that his singing vocal range was not as improved as he had wanted it to be.

He glanced over at Kyungsoo, who was nervously picking at his sweatpants. Jongdae went over to his friend and patted his shoulder. “Kyungsoo, out of everyone here besides Junmyeon, you should definitely be debuting. I think you’re the most capable one out of us here to be introduced to the media, man. Your voice is amazing.”

“I hope so. But, I don’t feel ready. I’ve only been casted one year before you, Jongdae. If I have to train for another two years, I don’t think I could take it.”

They both understood each other about home. Being far away from home more than training at least 20 hours a day. As they sat together amongst the chattering of the other students, Jongdae began to panic. Even the thought of him being picked scared him. If he were to debut, what about Seulgi? What would he do then? He didn’t even dare let the thought cross his mind, but it did. The thought of her leaving his side and the inability to contact each other for the longest time worried him. What would happen to the late night texts and cuddling in the practice room without the eyes of the staff watching their every move? He frowned as the instructor and manager came back into the room.

The instructor scanned the room and clapped his hands together for attention.

“He’s going to call some names and you will be escorted to another room. No questions please. Go ahead, Mr. Park.”

He cleared his throat, and one by one, names of familiar people and trainees Jongdae had grown close within the past couple of months had been called. The first one to be called up was Junmyeon, and he could almost see the tears in his Hyung’s face. Many congratulations were given to him and he smiled. After that, names were called in order.

“Park Chanyeol, Do Kyungsoo, Kim Jongin, Oh Sehun, Wu Yifan, Kim Minseok, Lu Han, Zhang Yixing, and Huang Zitao. Please follow me.”

Everyone was now lined up and excited looks spread across their faces. Jongdae felt a sense of relief but at the same time a little sad. He had grown so close to Chanyeol and Kyungsoo in the past few days along with the Chinese trainees. Kyungsoo gave him a look “I’m sorry, Jongdae.”

Jongdae shook his head and smiled back, “It’s okay. Good luck, Soo.”

He nodded and joined the rest of the crew following behind the manager out of the room. In his opinion and with the other trainees, that was a large group compared to other groups. The last boy group to ever debut was SHINee, and they were only five members. What was SM planning to have a group of 10 members? The idea was beyond him. The instructor closed the door and told everyone to re-do the routine. They were to get ready for the end of month evaluation soon. Just as the instructor was about to begin counting again, the door opened.

Jongdae quickly glanced over at Baekhyun and their eyes met. The manager had come back again. The instructor looked over at him. “Who are you missing?”

“Sorry for the interruption. Will Byun Baekhyun and Kim Jongdae please follow me?”

The two were led into a large conference room where the other ten trainees were seated. Jongdae and Baekhyun sat in the back and Kyungsoo was surprised to see him but glad. Chanyeol’s usual smile rose into a large Chesire cat smile. The person in the front of the room smiled and raised his hand towards them, “Ah, glad to see you guys. Sorry we did not call you the first time around. Things got a little confusing. We were just going to start the presentation.”

They both nodded and the presentation started.

There were too many details coming at them at once. It was official; they were debuting. The thought just surprised him. They were going to be a 12 member group, but split into two groups. A Chinese group and a Korean group. His heart dropped at the mention of him being in the Chinese group. He had nothing against his Chinese trainee friends, but it just meant he was going to be farther from his home. Not even by city, but by country. He glanced over to Minseok and he too seemed a little bummed by the idea. There was a list of songs they had to record and information was given to them about choreography. Their schedule was already planned by the company and they had to get comfortable with the managers.

Their dorm room was going to be the same as before because the 12 stayed together anyway. Roles were also given; he was to be the main vocal in EXO-M. Just the constant stress of singing the most was given to him. Also, he had to have more Chinese classes than usual. At the very end, they were assigned their stage names.

“Here are your new stage names. Stick to them; know them by heart. Korea and the world will know you by them,”

    EXO-K
Kim Junmyeon - “Suho” (guardian)

Byun Baekhyun - “Baekhyun”

Park Chanyeol - “Chanyeol”

Do Kyungsoo - “D.O.”

Kim Jongin - “Kai”

Oh Sehun - “Sehun”

    EXO-M

Wu Yifan - “Kris”

Zhang Yixing - “Lay”

Lu Han - “Luhan”

Kim Jongdae - “Chen”

Kim Minseok - “Xiumin”

Huang Zitao - “Tao”

Everyone had to accept the new name and be happy with it. They had no choice now; everyone was just happy they were debuting. Everything seemed unreal. Before they knew it, they would be filming their first music video and maybe even some teasers. They all knew there was going to be lots and lots of training ahead of them. Jongdae was not especially good at dancing. It was something he definitely needed to improve on to keep up with the good dancers in their group like Jongin and Sehun.

“Chen.” He whispered the name under his breath. It was unfamiliar, but it matched him well. He laughed thinking to himself all the misconceptions people would be having. They were going to mistaken him as Chinese. They were to start their training the very next day. It already almost past their last class of the day. The presentation had taken at the most 2 hours. They were going to get more information about their songs later. The choreographer was to come in tomorrow and teach all of them the steps to their debut song.

Everyone headed back to the dorm almost in a state of shock.

It was all so sudden. Some were unresponsive, others were just utterly happy. Jongdae grinned and put an arm over Kyungsoo’s shoulder, ruffling his hair. Everyone had smiles on their faces. Kyungsoo went into the cupboards just as they entered the room and began to look for some food to cook. There was nothing to be found, so he slightly frowned and closed them back up.

“Soo, what are you doing?” Baekhyun smiled and grabbed a banana milk from the fridge.

“There isn’t anything to eat in here… I wanted to cook something for all of us before our intense training begins. What time is it right now?” He sat down on the table along with the rest of the members and rested his head against the table. Junmyeon looked up at the digital clock to check the time.

“Can you believe it? It’s only 9PM. How about… we all eat out today? I’ll treat.”

Sehun looked at him in shock. “Are you serious, Hyung? Are we even allowed to do that?”

“Why not? We’re debuting; we have to have at least one night out. Eat anything and I’ll buy it for you, but no drinking whatsoever. We can’t get into any trouble or have a hangover tomorrow morning.” Everyone instantly agreed and high-fived each other before going to change from their sweaty practice clothes to their street clothes. Jongdae put on a black cap and just sported a tee and a grey sweater with his jeans. They were just about to head out the door. Chanyeol tugged on Jongdae’s shirt and gave him a look of concern.

“Jongdae… what are you going to do about Seulgi?”

She didn’t even cross his mind at that point. He was too happy about their debut to even begin thinking about anything else. A sudden sadness came over him and he sighed, clasping his hand over the phone in his pocket. Everyone was already out the door. Chanyeol noticed his friend’s expression and sighed, “Never mind, let’s just have fun tonight, okay?”

Jongdae hesitated before sighing and nodding.

But throughout the whole trip there, from the walk to the sharing of cola shots around the table, he couldn’t stop thinking about her. He stared at the steam coming off the pork that the other guys were grilling. All of the members were the loudest in the whole restaurant. Sehun was stuffing a lettuce wrap into Jongin’s mouth and everyone was happy; why couldn’t he be that way? His hands still fuddled with the phone in his pocket. He ate some meat, but he didn’t have much of an appetite. Kyungsoo had a piece of meat on his chopsticks and told Jongdae to open his mouth, “Ah, Jongdae. Hurry up before it becomes cold.”

He ate it and thanked him, before returning back to thinking. Kyungsoo saw his expression and set down his chopsticks, “What’s up?”

“Hm? What do you mean?” There was a silence in between them.

“Is it about Seulgi?”

“No, I mean, I don’t know.”

Kyungsoo frowned and advised Jongdae to text her, “We’re right by the Han River. Just tell her to meet on the side somewhere. Jongdae, at one point, you need to tell her all about this. You don’t have to end the relationship. Just tell her what you’re going through and I’m sure she’ll understand.”

Jongdae nodded and bit his lip, taking out his phone.

Jongdae
Seulgi, you there?

Joohyun (Irene) and Seulgi were busy finishing up their dance routine. They were building skills together for the end of month evaluation and there were to be no mistakes. She had heard from a few others that SM was planning to train a girl group to debut in a few years. With all of her years of training, she wanted to get into it so bad. The text notification interrupted the music momentarily but she ignored it and kept dancing. As the song ended, the two girls crashed on to the floor.

Sweat was sliding down their bodies and there was heavy breathing. Seulgi grabbed the two towels on the sofas on the side and tossed one over to her friend. Joohyun smiled and layed down on the wooden dance floor, “We did a good job today. Do you think we'll get good points this month?”

“I’m not sure about me, but you’re going to get some good marks this month, I’m sure of it.” This made Joohyun smile. Seulgi disconnected the phone from the wall charger and was surprised to find a text from Jongdae. Usually he stayed late to practice and didn’t get home or time to text her until midnight.

Seulgi
Yeah

Seulgi
What’s up? You usually don’t text me this early…

Jongdae
Are you done practicing with Joohyun?

Seulgi looked up from her phone and called over to her partner, “Hey, you think we can call it a night? I think we pretty much have the routine down.”

“Yeah, I’m beat.” She continued to text him.

Jongdae

Seulgi?

Seulgi

Yeah, I’m here. Joohyun and I are calling it a night. Why?

Jongdae

I have something to talk to you about…

Her mind suddenly began to cloud with thoughts. Jongdae usually wasn’t this serious. He was usually joking with her about some joke or talking about something else. What could it be to not talk it with her over text? Seulgi suddenly began to become worried and instantly texted him back.

Seulgi

What is it? Is something wrong?

Jongdae

No, it’s just… Can you meet by the Han River? Our usual spot on the bench next to the tree where we buried our time capsule.

Seulgi

Yeah, I’ll come.

Jongdae

Remember to grab a coat, silly. Don’t forget it like last time. It’s a little chilly tonight.

Seulgi

You’re already there?

Jongdae

Yeah. See you soon♡

Their texts seemed so serious at the moment. The heart he left at the end made her blush a little but she immediately grabbed her coat from the side of the room and grabbed her black cap. Joohyun sat up and gave her a questioning look, “Where are you going this late at night?”

“Jongdae, he wanted to talk about something.”

“Ah, okay. Have fun!” Joohyun gave her a quick eye smile before fanning herself again with her hands. Seulgi shut the door behind her and made her way out of the SM building to the Han River. He was right; it was a little chilly tonight. Autumn was coming in about a month. The street lights helped guide her way to their own little spot. She hugged herself a little tighter as she came across the bench they always met up at. The waters of the Han River crashed up against the banks below. All Jongdae was doing was staring into the waters, in deep thought.

Even from a side angle like this, he looked breathtaking. His soft plump lips and sharp jawline stood out. Even when he wasn’t smiling, the corners of his mouth shaped up. His cheekbones were shining off of the river’s night lights. She smiled to herself and tucked a piece of hair behind her ears. Seulgi walked up to him and sat up against him, “What are you thinking so deeply about?”

“Huh? Oh, hi.”

She smiled and they held hands. They sat in silence for the time being, staring at the waves competing with each other and going down the river. Seulgi sighed and looked up at him.
“What did you want to talk about?”

Jongdae bit his lip and began to prepare what he was about to say in his mind. It was already hurting his heart inside. He didn’t know how to say it. It wasn’t that complicated, but why was it so hard for him? Seulgi was trying to read his expression, but she couldn’t make out anything specific. He sighed and held her hand tighter.

“Seulgi, today I was called out of class along with my roommates.”

She immediately knew what was coming.

“And, well… I was put into a new boy group SM is debuting in a few months. There are two units to this group and I got put into EXO-M, the Chinese unit. My new stage name is Chen and I’ll mainly be promoting in China for our debut. I’ll tell you details later, but this means I’ll be overseas a lot and there’s so much practice and—”

Seulgi pulled him into a deep hug. Tears were b both of their eyes for the same reasons. It wasn’t that dramatic if someone else were to look from afar, but the two knew the consequences of dating as an idol and the amount of training and individual practice it took whenever an entertainment company tried to debut a new group. She took in a deep breath and smelled his fresh scent. She pulled back and wiped his tears.

He took another breath, “I’m sorry, Seulgi.”

She wiped her own tears and tried to laugh. “Why would you be sorry, Jongdae? You should be happy! I’m so happy for you. You finally met your goal. You’re debuting, and I’m going to support you every step of the way. It’s just that…” Seulgi suddenly burst into tears and he pulled her in close. Her tears wet his sweater, but it didn’t matter. He rested his chin on top of hers.

She loved the warm feeling of his chest and didn’t want to let go. She didn’t want to lose Jongdae. After all they had done together, she dreaded this day the most. They would still be together, of course, but so far apart. Seulgi was scared they were going to get distant; to lose the special connection they had just because of distance.

"You know, Seulgi, once I debut, we can't be with each other." He said the words she didn’t want to hear. She shook her head and sighed, hugging him closer.

She finally let go and tried to wipe the uncontrollable tears falling down her cheeks. "I know. But when you're happy on your first stage, I’ll be happy.”

"Then, why are you still crying?"

"I'm going to miss it a lot. Us."

Her words hung in the air between them. It hurt him so much to leave her. Her pale pretty face and cute eye smile. Her cute nose and her lips, especially her lips. He was going to miss it all too. Jongdae cupped her face in his hands and wiped away her tears with his thumbs, smiling to make her smile also. “I’m never going to leave you, you know that right?"

Seulgi closed her eyes and grabbed his hands away from her face. At that point, it seemed like a broken promise. It was going to be hard to keep a relationship with Jongdae's upcoming harsh training. He smiled and stared once more at the river. “Seulgi, do you remember?”

“What?”

“That one night when we went to the annual trainee camping trip?”

Jongdae stared into her eyes and was amazed at how beautiful they were. Her eyes never failed to make him love her no matter how many times he had looked. She looked away and tucked a piece of hair shyly behind her hair. The camp was silent, with the only the sounds of crickets and other insects nearby. He breathed in the fresh air and noticed Seulgi shivering a little with only her small sweater on. Jongdae pulled off his large jacket and covered it over her shoulders.

“No, Jongdae, it’s okay—“

“You can’t get sick. Just take it.”

He gave her a sweet smile and she smiled back. Seulgi slipped her hands into his and took a deep breath. She wondered how long they were able to do this; to enjoy each other’s company without anyone else looking behind their backs or making sure they weren’t doing anything. Seulgi set down her head on his shoulder and his fingers.

“I don’t want to go back, Jongdae.”

There was a moment of silence. He let go of her hand and took out his cell phone. The bright screen lit up against the dark night and he pressed the camera button. Jongdae raised it above his head and took a picture of the sparkling stars above, with the moon gleaming in the corner. It wasn’t as beautiful as it looked in real life, but the stars still shone brightly. He gave the phone to her to look at it.

“When we go back,” He slipped his hands into hers again, “And you miss me, just look at this picture.”

Seulgi brightly smiled and snuggled up against his warmth, "Thanks.”

“And Seulgi?”

“Hm?”

“Remember that these stars shine only for you.”

“Remember that these stars shine only for you.”

Seulgi looked down at their hands clasped together and smiled. “Of course I remember.”

“Do you still have that picture?”

“Yes.”

“Whenever you’re thinking of me, just look at that picture, okay? I’ll be doing the same.”

She shook, not because of the cold, but because of how anxious she was feeling about the whole situation. Seulgi nodded quietly before looking up at him. He was staring right into her eyes. Jongdae closed his eyes and leaned in for her soft lips. They met and he placed his hands on the sides of her head.

It didn’t feel like a goodbye.

The kiss ended and they were left longing for more. Jongdae checked the time and sighed, “I have to go back to the rest of the guys soon. You should go too, Seulgi.”

She sadly nodded and they both stood up, hand in hand, side by side. They walked a while until they reached to the street of Seulgi’s apartment near the company. She walked slowly away, not wanting to let go of his warm hands. His touch was everything. Jongdae smiled and kissed her quickly on the cheek.

“Go on in, your roommates are probably waiting for you.”

“Bye, Jongdae. I’ll text you.”

“Bye."

Seulgi smiled and Jongdae held back his tears, knowing he wasn’t going to see that smile for a long time. She finally turned her back towards him and walked towards her dorm.