12-16-12

180th day in Seoul.

The best love is the kind that awakens the soul and makes us reach for more. That plants a fire in our hearts and brings peace to our minds. You can’t stop loving or wanting to love because when it’s right, it’s the best thing in the world. When you’re in a relationship and it’s good, even if nothing else in your life is right, you feel like your whole world is complete.

I woke up in G-dragon’s arms, he’s in deep sleep for he just came home from rehearsals hours ago. Gosh! Here goes our hectic schedules once again, it’s a good thing that we can still see each other everyday here at home and we promised to each other that we will give our spare time to bond.

It’s been weeks since we move in together again in his house and as much as we try hard to keep our relationship down low and away from the people’s eyes, we are still dealing with a lot of rumors. On our second day of living together again, we were already caught by fans, it happens that some fans saw me ride his car in the middle of the night and followed me to his house and now, we’re busted. Some fans are really good spies and there are times that they wait outside the house (it’s really uncomfortable but it’s still good because they mean no harm).

The fans’ reactions are mixed, some are already expecting it ever since our relationship was announced, some were totally affected and some are happy. Our relationship is like an open book that everybody reads once in a while and no matter how we try to make it private, we can’t because it’s impossible.

“Babe…wake up” I shook him by the shoulder and he squirm.

I hate to disturb him from his sleep but his phone has been ringing non-stop and I have a feeling that the call is urgent.

“Somebody’s calling you…answer it first” I told him and he opened his eyes and I handed him his phone.

“Yoboseyo?” he got up from bed and went to the balcony.

It’s a weekend and I don’t have to work, I’m planning to visit G-dragon’s parents later for his mom called me yesterday telling me to visit them and she will cook for me. I’m really excited because ever since our relationship was publicize, they really became my shoulder to cry on (G-dragon knows nothing about this, I always go to his parents house whenever I have time and I’ll just stay there until my mind is freshened up).

“What’s with the pissed expression babe?” I asked when he went back to the room.

“Nothing” he climbed up the bed and pulled me closer to him and hugged me.

“Kwon Jiyong” I called lazily.

“mmm”

“I know that something is bothering you…you’re just hiding it from me” I told him and he chuckled.

“You don’t have to know it baby girl…I don’t want to spoil your day” he said and from there, I know that it’s something serious.

“It’s about a canceled deal but I don’t give a damn about it” he said and I stared at him, I was trying to weigh his emotions.

“Tell me about it…don’t bottle up your problems inside you…it’s my job to listen to you no matter how senseless you can be” I said and he laughed.

Truth is, there are a lot of things that are happening now to him that I don’t know. 2 days ago, Daryl heard from one of Big Bang’s manager that G-dragon is suppose to be an endorser for a clothing brand and it was already fixed and polished, but the clothing company cancelled his contract days before the official signing. And now, a deal was cancelled and he’s not planning to tell me everything about it too.

“You’re aware of my solo album right?” he asked and I nod.

“It is supposed to be distributed in Asia not only here in Korea and Japan…and for that to be possible…YG asked for some sponsors to help make it possible…the thing is...the biggest sponsor cancelled without any reasons” he said and I smirked.

“But babe…there are a lot of people who are willing to invest in that album right?” I asked and he nod.

“Yes…but that sponsorship is quite big…and because of its cancellation….the album release will have to be postponed” he said and I looked at him in surprise.

GOSH! His problem is bigger now and I can’t even help. I hate this! I hate seeing him sad and disappointed, I don’t want to see him hurting and having a hard time.

“Babe…I’m sure that everything will be alright…and I know that your album will be release on its official release date…trust me” I told him and he kissed my temple.

His silence is making my mind swirl, I want to hunt that sponsor who cancelled and ruined everything for his album. I feel so helpless, if only I can do something to solve his problem, I’ll do anything.

“Jiyong…I know that you’re bugged by it….I can see and feel it…I know that behind that smile are a lot of questions and you’re thinking of things how to solve it…babe…take it easy…I’m sure that things will be alright” I said after a long silence.

“Baby girl…since when can you read minds?’ he asked.

“I told you…this special power only shows whenever you’re being secretive” I told him and he laughed.

“I’m OK now…thank you baby girl…I don’t know what to do without you” he said and I kissed him on the lips.

“You know what? You’re really cute whenever you’re problematic…the way you pout...the way you bite your lips when you’re thinking so deep…you’re fake smiles…you’re sad and pissed voice…I love it!” I said and he pinched my nose.

“So I have to be problematic everyday for you to love me more?” he asked and I giggled.

“NO! I don’t want you to have problems anymore…if only I can help you or even take half of your problems just to make you feel lighter…I will definitely shoulder it for you” I said and he hugged me tightly.

“ baby girl…you’re making me want to marry you more…do you know that?” he said and I started tearing up.

“I think I don’t have to ask if you’re serious” I said.

“Why?” he asked while leaving kisses on my forehead.

“Because this is the first time that you used together with baby girl…and that’s quite different for me” I said and he laughed.

“I love you so much!” he said and hugged me so tight.

“I love you too...I really wish that things will go our way soon…I can’t take seeing you like this” I said and he kissed me on the lips.

I don’t know why problems keep on coming. There are times that I nearly quit because I’m getting tired of thinking about how to solve our problems. Good thing G-dragon is really strong and he’s the one keeping me alive in this game.

“KWON JIYONG!” I shouted when he unclasped my bra.

“Yeah?” he asked then smiled sheepishly.

“That kiss is just a kiss to comfort you…what do you think are you doing?” I asked and he laughed.

“AISH!”

“Actually…it’s a bit hot” I pushed him to his side of the bed and got up while securing my bra.

“Where are you going?” he asked but I pretend not to hear anything.

I locked the door, shut down the curtains, opened the lamp and stood in front of the bed with my arms cross over my chest.

“Baby girl…if you’re just going to tea