**1**

Jackson knocks the door. I pretend i don’t hear, snuggling a little bit more in my granny’s old blankets. They still smell like mint, they still smell like her. I don’t want to talk to anybody but Jackson insists, saying he just wants to know if I’m okay. I don’t want is comfort, not now. He is the last person that I want to see, hear, feel… ‘’’’, I whisper. He’s still in my head. Why doesn’t he go away? I don’t deserve him, neither he deserves me. We’re from different worlds.

«Come on Lisbon, I know you’re awake.» His voice sounds sad, something that is strange for me. I always heard his cheerful voice. But now was no time for cheerful thoughts. «Let me in, please»

Yes, I knew that going to live with my mother was not that bad, but my life was here, in my granny’s house. Is, or was here that I had a family, and now everything is about to change. The tears began to be hard to hold. Jackson keeps knocking, but I don’t have the strength to let him come in. I can’t let him in because if I do, I wont be strong enough to let him go anymore. And I knew I didn’t felt the same way for me, and that we were just best friends, but dammit how I really loved that guy with his hazelnut eyes. And dammit how I hate him for that. But this was about to end, now that I will be worlds away from here. The tears keep falling and I let my hiccups fill the room.

«I don’t want to go!» - The hiccups keep growing every minute. I pray that Jackson won’t hear me crying, but God doesn’t hear my prays. A ‘click’ sound is all I hear before Jackson opens the door with a big ‘BANG’ and runs to me, hugging me at the end.

I bury my face in the old blankets, don’t wanting him to see my crying face. And we stay like that, without saying much, with my hiccups as background music.

«Go away»- my words are muffled by the cloth that is covering my face. I feel his arms around me. Oh, how much I liked the feeling of his arms around me.

«Lis, look at me» - his hands pull the blankets away from my face, revealing my red and swollen eyes that don’t dare to look at Jack’s beautiful face. «Lis, I know it is… a difficult moment. But you’ve got to be strong, okay? For your granny, for your mom and for me.»

I notice the sadness of his words and his husky voice echoes in my ears. He always cared for me. I’ve always been his ‘’little sister’’. Even knowing how i felt, he never ignored me. He always stood the same, till the end.

His thumbs run through my face, keeping the tears away. I notice that our noses are very close, almost touching. We’re so close that I feel is breathe in my chin, in my lips, in m…

«J-Jackson?»- His nose is stuck with mine. His eyes looking directly in to mine. Only one centimeter keeps our lips from touching themselves. Only one centimeter keeps me away from everything I’ve always wanted.

«Oh, Lis…»  His lips finally touch mine causing me a chill all over my body. They’re so warm, and move so slowly keeping me away from reality. I’ve always wanted him. And now that I have him, it won’t be for too long.

I move away from him, clean the tears and I face him right in the eyes. He looks down, trying to calm down his heavy breath. Jack passes his hand through is brown hair giving him a mature feeling.

«Lis, sorry, I didn’t… I didn’t resist» he whispers, sighing right away. He feels guilty. This was just an act of pity, and I knew it. Because it would be the last time he was going to see me. I close my fists.

«Out. GO AWAY» mad at him, I scream with all my strength, pushing him away from the bed. He trips and falls, bursting in to tears. Crying. His reaction surprises me. Why is he crying? It’s me who should be crying. «Stop!» I scream again, and out cries form a choir, something who would be really funny in a comedy movie.

«Lis, I… I’m really sorry, I»  he starts hiccupping as he cleans the tears from his face. «I don’t want you to go! I need you. You are… You are more special than I thought. You…»

I couldn’t hear him anymore. I get up from the bed and run away from that bed room, closing the door with all the strength I had at the moment. I wanted to run away. I didn’t what to think. I loved him. He… loves me?! But I’m going away. And he’s going to stay. And… It doesn’t work.