Yoongi bit the tip of his worn out mechanical pencil and muttered a string of curses. He had been in the studio for hours and hadn’t been able to come up with something satisfactory. It’s an off day, he’s sure; he’s had them a lot recently. Stress was eating away at him but he knew it was in the job description. Inspiration was limited, would always be, but he had to work with what he had. He signed up for it a long time ago and he was determined to stick through it with his head held high.

Still, he knows that if he lingers in the studio little beautiful threads will begin to weave their way along the lines of his paper. Dark marks are littered along the entirety of the page but every so often a line will be written down that doesn’t make him want to punch the wall.

“Hyung, do you think he’s okay living like that?” Jimin’s words were laced with distress and Yoongi could hear him oh so clearly through the thin walls. The younger was no doubt latched on to Seokjin or maybe even Hoseok, brows furrowed with concern.

Yoongi frowned and gripped his pencil a little tighter. He ignored the nagging voice at the back of his head and continued to work on the lyrics he’d been slaving over all morning. A voice caught his attention again and Yoongi sighed. Namjoon.

“It’s Yoongi we’re talking about. No different from me and Hoseok,” A pause. Yoongi knew Namjoon was probably ruffling Jimin’s hair or pinching his cheeks and had to pretend there wasn’t an achy squeeze at his heart, “Why don’t you ask him?”

Another pause.

Yoongi felt like he waited for an eternity before Namjoon sighed and ordered Jimin to get back to the dorm if he was going to just stand there. He ran his fingers along the wilted corners of pages filled with nonsense lyrics and indecipherable scribbles. Yoongi liked to pretend that he didn’t feel disappointed.

By the time Yoongi forced himself out of the studio the sun was threatening to burst above the horizon. Yoongi’s eyes burned from the computer, his ears ringing with various beats, but he couldn’t even feel tired. His steps were light as he pushed open the door to the dorm, gaze wandering to see if anyone was around.

Yoongi smiled at the realization that everyone was still asleep and rubbed his face on the way to the kitchen. The fluorescent lights burned too much after so he just grabbed the plate of leftovers Seokjin left out for him and popped it in to the microwave without bothering to turn the lights on.

Heavy footsteps alerted him of Namjoon’s presence before the younger could even speak and Yoongi hummed out a greeting. It was unusual to see Namjoon up so early but Yoongi figured he wanted to get a few hours in the studio alone before the rest of the kids woke up.

“Jimin’s worried about you, dumb kid. He should know your kind by now.” Namjoon’s words are lighthearted but Yoongi knows there’s a deeper sincerity in them. Chopsticks in hand, he waved Namjoon over to the living room and dropped in his favorite armchair. Namjoon followed apprehensively and spread out on the couch with his phone in hand. Yoongi was silent for a while, only chewing silently as Namjoon scrolled down his twitter feed. 

“What do you mean my kind?” Yoongi’s voice startled Namjoon and he had to laugh when the other dropped his phone on his face. After a few minutes of useless complaining and grunting, Namjoon finally clicked his tongue.

“Y’know, dense, overachiever, bad at romance, and the list goes on.” Namjoon’s grin was a little too happy for Yoongi to handle so he flicked a noodle at him. The overly high pitched whining was ignored and another noodle was all it took to shut him up.

 “The hell? I’m your hyung, show some respect. Besides, you’re one to talk.” Namjoon rolled his eyes and casually flicked him off.

“Whatever. Anyways, you should probably talk to him.” Yoongi’s face blanked in an attempt to appear nonchalant but Namjoon knew him too well after so many years, “I mean it. Don’t pretend you don’t care, it’s not a pretty look for you.” More noodles were thrown but Namjoon dodged them and stood up to leave.

“Why should I?” Yoongi snapped at Namjoon as he grabbed his keys from the kitchen counter and the younger frowned back at him. Yoongi didn’t mean to be harsh, regretted it almost immediately, but Namjoon always knows.

“I don’t need to tell you why.”

Yoongi didn’t bother finishing his food and retreated to the bedroom to catch up on sleep, choosing to ignore Namjoon’s advice. He has known Namjoon long enough to determine there’s a double meaning to why he wants him to talk to Jimin. His fingers danced along the width of the wood of Jimin and Hoseok’s bunk but pulled away at the sight of Jimin sleeping.

He didn’t dream.

Yoongi woke to the strong scent of food and loud conversation ringing in his ears. Seokjin didn’t bother trying to wake him up on their free days anymore. It was a waste of time and Yoongi was happy to be left to his own devices. He was lucky enough to wake up just as everyone was sitting down to eat and he absentmindedly ruffled Jimin’s hair as he sat across from him. Hoseok and Taehyung livened up the conversation and Yoongi participated here and there, but he couldn’t miss the way Namjoon glanced pointedly at him every so often. He ignored it in favor of passing some of his food on to Jimin’s plate.

“Eat up,” Yoongi grinned, “Little Jiminie needs to grow up big and strong like his hyung.”

“One centimeter!” Jimin whined. He shoved the food in his mouth anyways, “You should eat, though.” The combination of the worry in Jimin’s voice and his pout was enough to make Yoongi clam up, discomfort clawing under his skin, and he returned to his food.

He could feel Namjoon’s stare burning in to him.

Yoongi returned to the bedroom after helping Taehyung with the dishes. He had a deadline and he needed to finish those lyrics. He grabbed his writing notebook from his backpack and shoved it on the desk as he plopped down in his chair with a huff. Jeongguk was already asleep in his bed and Yoongi wondered if he should have just gone straight to the studio.

Eventually the gears in his head started to turn as the lyrics were flowing on to the paper. He felt a little happy with himself considering all the stress he went through with the previous session. Tapping his chin with his pencil eraser, Yoongi tried to remember the arrangements he had set up the previous night as he scratched out and replaced and revised. The lead from his pencil always writes Yoongi’s songs a bleary gray but he sees red.

A small smile danced on his lips that eventually blossomed in to a full out grin as he reread his song. He felt confident, confident enough to present to the company, and was ecstatic. It felt good to be producing songs that could get recognition. He couldn’t help the pride in his voice when he announced on variety or radio shows that he had participated in producing a song on one of their albums.

Yoongi grabbed the notebook and threw on some of the clothes lying around his room. With this much creativity he couldn’t resist the urge to get back to the studio. He had the perfect arrangement that could suit the lyrics and he wouldn’t be able to rest without trying it out. He figured that he could at least start recording a demo and then show Namjoon and Hoseok.

Seokjin was wrapping a scarf around his neck in the living room when Yoongi entered, cheeks flushed and eyes bright with excitement. The older man raised a questioning brow and grabbed his phone off the coffee table.

“You’re heading back to the studio?” Yoongi nodded in confirmation and Seokjin sighed, “Let’s go together.”

“You’re going to practice alone again?” Seokjin shrugged his shoulders and moved towards the door to shrug his sneakers on.

“I don’t want to bother anyone.”

The two left the dorm in a mutual understanding, linking arms as they began the trek to the studio. Mindless chatter surrounded them but Yoongi’s head was still full of inspiration. Seokjin glanced down at him and laughed.

“So you still haven’t talked to Jimin?” Yoongi immediately frowned.

“There’s nothing to talk about.” Seokjin scoffed and pinched Yoongi’s forearm with his free hand.

“Don’t play stupid. You know Jimin’s worried about you, all you have to do is tell him you’re okay and that’ll be the end of it.”

“There’s nothing to be worried about so I shouldn’t have to make him feel better.” Seokjin’s frown deepened and he knocked his shoulder against Yoongi, almost making him fall over. Yoongi cursed aloud and did his best glare as he unlinked their arms.

“Yeah, that’s true, we all know that. But still, you know how Jimin is when it comes to you.” Seokjin rubbed his hands together in an attempt to warm them up as Yoongi narrowed his eyes, “He just wants you to be happy and healthy.”

“Well I am.” Yoongi bit back.

“Then just tell him to stop worrying, I don’t get why you’re being so stubborn.” The way Seokjin looked at him made Yoongi feel as if he did know.

“Whatever you’re implying, don’t. The hell is wrong with you and Namjoon?” Seokjin laughed and threw his arm around Yoongi’s shoulders, winning easily against the younger’s resistance.

“We know how you are. Just go up to the kid and tell him you’re okay and that you l-” Yoongi made a strange noise as he clasped a hand over Seokjin’s mouth. His head felt a little dizzy as blood rushed to his ears.

“Don’t.” Seokjin pursed his lips under Yoongi’s hand and pushed away.

“You’re just wasting time.” Yoongi sped up, ignoring Seokjin’s calls from behind.

Yoongi always lost track of time when he was in the studio. Hoseok dropped in a while after he started working and he was happy to share his creative streak with the younger. They shared lyrics back and forth and Hoseok gave him his opinion on the beat he was working on. After a few hours Hoseok retreated back to the practice room in favor of working on a solo dance and Yoongi was content enough to stay in the studio for longer.

Resting his earphones on his neck, Yoongi went over his lyrics for the umpteenth time. A brisk knock on the door grabbed his attention and he grunted for the person to come in. He looked over his shoulder to see Jimin poke his head in and ruffle a plastic bag in his direction.

“Hungry?” Yoongi could practically hear his stomach scream in agreement and he nodded while spinning to face the younger.

“Were you practicing?” Jimin nodded and shut the door behind him as he pranced in to the room. Placing the bag in Yoongi’s lap, Jimin grabbed a carton of strawberry milk and shrimp chips for himself and collapsed on the couch.

“Yeah, Jeongguk and I don’t want to forget any choreo.” Yoongi grabbed a bread from the pile of snacks and placed the bag on the floor. A twinge of jealousy rose in his heart and he tried his best to push it away.

“So you brought me snacks?” Yoongi would have laughed at Jimin’s queasy expression if he didn’t feel the same way. He turned back to the computer screen and bit in to his bread.

“Um, Seokjin hyung said you’ve been in here for a couple hours and I know you haven’t eaten since lunch so…” Yoongi swallowed a piece of bread and frowned.

“Read these lyrics.” Yoongi shoved the paper in Jimin’s direction in a way to steer him away from where he was no doubt headed. Jimin sheepishly took the paper and read the lyrics between handfuls of chips.

“Who are these lyrics about?” Jimin finally spoke up after a few minutes.

“Who do you think? It’s not like I’m allowed to go around and date.” Yoongi laughed bitterly and tossed the bread wrapper in the waste basket under the desk. Jimin smiled uncomfortably.

“They’re really good they just seem…different.”

“I don’t know what I’m supposed to say to that.” Yoongi deadpanned as he screened another notebook for anything with potential.

“Sorry, it just seems a lot more angsty. Are you, um, okay?” Jimin bit his lip. Yoongi felt his throat go dry.

“You don’t have to worry about me.” Yoongi liked to pretend he couldn’t see Jimin’s hurt expression in the reflection of the computer.

“Why?” Jimin’s words caught him off guard and he couldn’t stop himself from turning around.

“What do you mean, why?” Yoongi felt his stomach drop. The conversation had taken an unexpected turn to a direction he was adamant in staying clear of. There were so many possible outcomes that he wasn’t sure he was ready for.

“Why can’t I worry about you? You worry about me all the time!” Jimin’s words rang true in Yoongi’s ear and he opened his mouth to retaliate only to fall short, “Why won’t you just let me in?”

Yoongi was caught off guard by the obvious hurt and confusion in Jimin’s voice. His fingers tightened around the notebook in his grasp and he lowered his gaze. Jimin’s eyes were too unguarded and Yoongi couldn’t bring himself to look in to them.

“You’re so stupid.” Yoongi muttered, abandoning the notebook on the desk to stand up and grab Jimin’s wrist to pull him off the couch. Jimin dropped his snacks and widened his eyes as he was pulled in to a warm embrace.

Yoongi ran his fingers down the trail of Jimin’s spine and tried to ignore the sound of pent up frustration finally being released. The wet patch on his shoulder was more than enough for him to realize how much unnecessary trouble he had caused.

“I’m sorry,” Jimin choked out, “I just want you to take care of yourself and I get so worried but I know I shouldn’t and I’m sorry.” Yoongi ignored the clenching in his heart and continued to squeeze and comfort.

“You don’t need to worry about me. I’m okay, Jiminie.” Yoongi pushed the younger away from him by the hips and hesitated. Deciding that it was worth his pride, he leaned in and pressed a kiss to the corner of Jimin’s mouth. The younger squeaked in surprise and Yoongi rested his forehead on his collarbone.

“Shut up, don’t say a word.”

“Does this mean-” Yoongi pinched his hips and frowned.

“I said shut up.”

Yoongi liked to pretend he didn’t feel the smile on Jimin’s lips against his hair.