AN: Thank you to all my sweet subscribers and you wonderful commenters! I am so happy you like this story. In compensation for my awful procrastination, I have two new chapters! Please continue to read, comment, and enjoy~

PAINT THE ROSES RED

Two: The Driest Thing I've Ever Known

Jimin's eyes snap open.

For a moment, he just stands there. He just stares wide-eyed at his Mother, mouth slightly agape. Then slowly, so slowly, the word stutters out of his lips.

"W-what?"

Jimin's Mother frowns sadly and lets go of her son. There's a painful, strange silence before she sighs heavily. "Jimin…please try to remember."

Jimin stares back at the woman in horror, and he can think of nothing to say. His brow furrows and he looks down and shakes his head violently, stepping back, moving away.

He doesn't want to be near his Mother. Now, his Mother doesn't represent surprise, joy, or gratefulness. Now, his Mother represents Death.

His death.

This "dream" is turning into a nightmare, and Jimin doesn't like it.

"N-no—Mom, what are you talking about? This is a dream. I'm not—"

And suddenly, it starts.

Flashes of those memories that he had forgotten. What happened before he came here, to this relaxed, quiet, Autumn-filled place.

There's two young men. There's an argument. There's shouting, blaming, fear of the truth. There's a distracted driver. There's a crash. There's pain, agony. There is death.

There is Yoongi, slumped lifeless in the driver's seat.

"Oh my God," Jimin cries, his voice breaking, and then he's on the ground. He's on the ground, and his hands are yanking at his hair and he's shaking back and forth and he's horrified. His face is pale and the tears are exploding out of his eyes now, and he can't see clearly but he thinks that his Mother is still standing there, but he can't face actually talking to her again, because he know and she must know that both his death and Yoongi's death is his fault.

The reaction was expected, but the minute she actually sees it, Jimin's Mother feels tears sliding down her cheeks. Seeing her child in such agony is so dreadful.

Cautiously, she steps forward. She walks forward until she's standing right next to her son's shaking form on the ground. (She doesn't want to actually bend down and hug Jimin; She can tell that that's not what Jimin wants at the moment, and she'll respect that).

"Oh, Jimin," she says, and her voice is filled with sorrow and pity. Her face melts into a look that mirrors his feelings exactly. "Please, please don't cry. This is not your fault."

At those words, Jimin feels fury explode inside. He flies his head up and shoots a death glare at his Mother, and he begins yelling even though his words are barely understandable through his sobs.

"Wh-what are you tal-talking about? Mom, Yoongi is dead because of me! I'm dead because of me!"

At those last words, he truly can't believe the situation he's in.

He is dead. He took his own life.

And he took Yoongi's.

A dreadful, ear-shattering sob erupts from him and he hides his head in his hands and shuts up.

His Mother's frown deepens. "Jimin, this was an accident. It was a car accident. The other driver was drunk and drifted into your lane. In no way was this your—"

Jimin's head shoots up again, and his eyes watery and sad.

"Stop it," he whispers.

His Mother obeys.

Jimin stares back down at his small, white, vein-covered hands. He clenches the fabric of his pants, and he feels his body begin to tremor horrifically. He's shaking and shaking and his teeth are chattering and it feels like his bones are all breaking because he's shaking so hard.

And then finally…

"Jimin, as painful as this is, this is a start of a journey for you."

Jimin blinks and he stops shaking.

His Mother's voice is softly stern, and when Jimin looks up to see his Mother's face, she is staring at him, all seriousness.

Jimin feels anger, frustration, and hate well up inside of him, but he knows that deep down all those feelings are just covers for his utter hopelessness and helplessness.

"What are you talking about?" Jimin says, his voice becoming higher and more hysterical with each word.

His Mother sighs. She looks down at the ground beneath her feet for a moment; then, she looks back up. Her brown eyes, the ones that are almost an exact copy of Jimin's, are sad.

"Jimin…I don't want to talk to you about this right now. But we'll speak again later; I promise."

Then, it happens.

Slowly, so slowly, his Mother begins fading.

It's subtle at first, but Jimin notices that his Mother's outline is getting a bit blurry, and then parts of her are melting into the background, and then finally she's all but completely gone.

Terror begins to fill Jimin at the speed of light.

He does not want to be alone.

As frustrated, shocked, or God-knows-what he was towards his Mother, she was still his Mother, and Jimin was talking to her after a year and a half, and while Jimin was talking to her Jimin wasn't alone in this unknown place with nothing but his demons to keep him company.

Flashes of being alone and lost and hopeless in this eerie place play through his mind.

Tears are pouring down his cheeks, now, and he's desperate.

"M-Mom!" he chokes out, and he runs forward, hand outstretched. "Oh God, Mom, please don't go!"

Jimin dives forward, and in that moment, he has never experienced a worse mix of emotions.

Pure horror, anguish, self-loathing, frustration, regret, and misery floods his veins and pounds through every nook and cranny of his body as he tries to grasp the ghost of what is left of his Mother. His fingertips immediately float over nothing but air, nothing but cold, lonely, empty air, and he loses his balance.

Next thing he knows, he's sprawled on the cobblestone ground, the rough rock scratching his face, staring hopelessly, helplessly, blankly off to the side, stone-still.

is dry.

His head is pounding.

His eyes are aching from so many tears.

His heart is going a million miles an hour.

He doesn't understand it.

"Mom…why'd you go?" he whispers out.

His voice is like sandpaper against , and he knows that he sounds like a pathetic, lost child.

He is met with nothing but silence.

The wind rustles and carries more leaves across the cobblestone pathway, the clouds block the sun a little bit, and he's all alone. Not a soul is with him.

And then, out of his lips comes a .

It's quite a terrifying .

All his fear and self-hate comes out in that , and he just wants to die.

But then—oh wait.

He's already dead.

He clenches his eyes shut, rests his forehead against the hard, painful ground, and mummers out,

"Why?"

The wind rustles again.

 Jimin opens his eyes because…

…Because if he heard it right, if he listened closely enough to that last Autumn breeze that carried a few dead, brown leaves across his view, then he heard a voice, too.

A voice was carried with that wind.

His Mother's voice.

And his Mother's voice was answering him.

Why?, Jimin had asked. Why?

"All things happen for a reason, Jimin," is what his Mother's voice tells him.

All of a sudden, Jimin feels the ground below him change.

It's not rough cobblestone anymore. In fact, it's not rough at all.

It's soft.

Familiar.

It's dark green carpet.

Jimin blinks.

He lifts up his head, trying to clear his foggy mind.

No longer is he all alone on that autumn pathway behind his home; now, he is in a dark-lit living room.

The living room of his childhood home.

He's right at the foot of the staircase, which is right in front of the front door.

There's a fire lit in the fireplace, and outside, if Jimin looks closely, he can see faint, tiny snowflakes falling.

There is a Christmas tree.

It's right in the middle of the room, grandiose and the epitome of the holiday season, and under it lie many presents wrapped in colorful paper.

It's wintertime.

Christmas time.

Jimin flies up.

The pain and exhaustion from before are suddenly gone now, and he feels a rush of anxiousness. He's in another new place.

"Hello?" he calls out, and looks around. No one replies.

But then—

In front of him, Jimin suddenly sees two forms.

They're adults; one's a female, one is a male.

Jimin mentally kicks himself for not noticing them before.

He walks over the few feet to be near them. He taps the man on the shoulder.

"Excuse me-?"

Then he stops mid sentence because…

Oh my God.

It's his father.

And the man in front of his father, is his Mother.

Jimin feels his heart begin to pound.

His father left on Christmas Eve, when Jimin was three years old. All Jimin ever saw of him were old pictures.

His Mother would pass away in seven years time, and his father either won't know about it, or won't care.

Tears well at the corner of his eyes.

He clenches them shut and clenches his hands into fists as well.

He will not let his father come into his mind.

Jimin will not let that man haunt him anymore or cause him pain.

The minute he was old enough to understand how much pain he had cause him and his Mother by leaving, he decided he would not be a part of his life; he would just be a far off memory Jimin would never revisit or let bother him. He's spent his entire life trying to keep that promise to himself.

But in this very moment, he can't help but let some misery and anger flood his veins.

After all…the scene is unfolding in front of him because now the people, who were, before, frozen in time, are talking.

Yelling, actually.

"I can't believe you're doing this!" his Mother screams, fury burning in her eyes, throwing her arms out. "You're leaving me and your three-year-old son, on Christmas Eve, for some woman you just met?"

Jimin's father glares.

"I've been seeing her for over half a year now. I didn't just meet her, don't be an idiot. I love her. She loves me. She cares about—"

"I DON'T CARE!" Jimin's Mother interrupts with an ear-shattering cry. "YOU'RE STILL DESERTING JIMIN!"

His father frowns, and now fury is burning in his eyes.

"YOU HAVE MADE ME MISERABLE. I'VE SPENT THE LAST SEVEN YEARS OF MY LIFE COMPLETELY MISERABLE WITH YOU. I NEED TO GET RID OF IT ALL. ALL THIS PAIN. I NEED TO GET RID OF YOU!"

She pauses and watches as his Mother's face is stricken with horror and pain at his words.

"And if getting the fresh start that I would kill for means leaving Jimin as well as you, then so be it."

And then he is gone out the door into the dark, snowy night.

For a minute, Jimin's Mother just continues standing in front of the door. She's motionless, wordless.

Jimin steps forward, knowing that tears are rolling down his cheeks.

For most of his life, his Mother had briefly mentioned or described how his father left to Jimin. That information was so rare and so little, and since Jimin was so young when he left, he really had no idea how the whole situation played out.

But now…now, he's seen it.

He has no idea why or how in God's name he witnessed it, especially since it happened eighteen years ago, but he did.

And he can't believe what he saw.

He can't believe how heartless his father was. And most of all, he can't believe how concerned about him his Mother was.

It wasn't about "you're leaving me" like most people would react; it was about "you're leaving Jimin".

Slowly, he inches behind his Mother, and he reaches out to touch his parent's shoulder.

But his hand goes right through the body.

For a minute, Jimin gets a fleeting rush of panic.

But then he remembers…

I'm dead. She can't see me.

Jimin brings his hand back down to his side, sniffles, and tries to clear his eyes.

All of a sudden, from behind him, he hears a small sound.

Tiny, shuffling feet.

Eerily in sync, Jimin and his Mother turn to stare up the staircase.

There, behind the banister, standing in small, warm, light blue pajamas, peeking out sleepily and rubbing his puppy-like ebony eyes with tiny hands, stands three-year-old Jimin.

Jimin's face melts into a look of pity.

It's as if he's not looking at himself as the next thought rushes through his head.

Poor boy. He has no idea his dad just completely deserted him.

"Jimin…what are you doing up?"

His Mother speaks, and Jimin watches as she steps forward to the stairs, places a hand on the railing, and tries to hold back tears Jimin sees shimmering at the corner of her eyes.

Jimin feels an overwhelming sense of love and admiration for his Mother suddenly.

He never truly realized just how strong his Mother was through his entire life. She raised Jimin by herself after she was walked out on so cruelly. Raised him until the day she died.

Three-year-old Jimin stops rubbing his eyes for a moment and answers in his young English,

"Noises, Mommy. Loud noises. They scare me."

Jimin feels a couple more tears roll down his cheeks as he watches his younger self.

Then, he notices something.

His Mother is crying.

Slowly, so slowly, she walks up the staircase, the wooden steps creaking oh-so slightly, and she reaches the top. She reaches down and scoops up her young son into her arms, and she sits.

There's quiet for a moment.

It's supposed to be the quiet of Christmas; the quiet of what is supposed to be excitement for "Santa", the joy of family and laughter, and peace.

Instead, it the quiet of heartbreak, shock, and a little bit of blissful naivety. Jimin stands at the foot of the steps and watches his younger self and his Mother in awe.

Three year old Jimin reaches up slowly and pats his Mother's cheek lightly.

"You cry, Mommy," he whispers.

She visibly tenses and sniffles.

"Don't you worry, Minnie," she replies, her tone shaky but strong, "I'm fine. Now, let's get you back to—"

The next question almost knocks Jimin off of his feet.

His three year old self looks up innocently, blinks slowly, and says,

"Mommy, Daddy left. Where he go?"

Silence again.

Jimin's head is spinning.

Why doesn't he remember any of this?

At her son's question, Jimin's Mother, simply blinks.

Jimin sees that he is shaking slightly.

"Daddy left because he wasn't feeling well and had to go somewhere to feel better."

Three-year-old Jimin blinks.

"His tummy hurt?"Jimin and his Mother both smile at that.

"Sure, Jimin…" she sighs heavily. "His tummy hurt."

The world around Jimin begins to fade.

Jimin snaps back into reality as soon as he sees the outlines of things become blurrier and blurrier.

He's going someplace else; he has no idea where, why, or how it's happening, but somehow, he's traveling through time.

He's a bit afraid, he'll admit, and he's confused. But for some reason, he's faintly excited too.

But right before the living room fades around him, right before the all-too familiar atmosphere leaves, Jimin hears one last snippet of conversation from his past:

"Mommy?"

"Yes, Jimin?"

"Mewwy Cwhistmas."

"Merry Christmas, Jimin. I love you and always will."Jimin smiles and closes his eyes.

For a minute, everything is okay.

The next moment, when Jimin opens his eyes, he's standing in the same living room.

For a moment, he's confused. Wasn't he supposed to go somewhere else?

He looks around a bit more.

There's a fire going in the fireplace.

There's a Christmas tree in the middle of the room.

The calendar on the fireplace mantle reads "December 24th".

It's almost exactly like the scene Jimin just came from.

For a minute, Jimin gets a rush of fury and horror.

He just went through an unbelievably painful experience—to watch his Mother leave like that. He does not want to have to witness it again.

Was this some kind of punishment for his horrible life on Earth? Was he going to have to spend Eternity re-watching that horrible moment from his past over and over because he made so many mistakes? Was he—

"Hey, Mom, can I ask you something?"

Jimin snaps his head around the second he hears the voice. He blinks in shock as soon as he sees the source.

There, in front of him and next to the Christmas tree, stands his nine-year-old self. His Mother, a bit older since the last time he saw him, sits on the couch, reading a magazine, a year before she got sick and passed away.

Jimin takes a shaky breath of relief in. He's in a different time; a different place. He's not sure what to expect in this memory or flashback or whatever this is. The last one was so heart wrenching; he's not sure how it could get any worse, but at least it's not the same. Jimin, once he recomposes himself, begins to observe the scene a bit more closely, and as soon as he does, he notices that his nine-year-old self looks sort of…uneasy.

He's got his arms folded across his chest, and one hand's fingers are tapping nervously against his elbow. His shoulders are high and tense, and he has a frown on his face.

And then, once again, Jimin notes, his younger self and his Mother cannot see him at all.

Upon noticing her son standing next to him, Jimin's Mother takes a breath in and closes her magazine. She puts the article neatly down next to her on the couch cushion, and she turns to his son, trying not to act at all surprised to see his child's obvious uneasiness.

"Yeah, of course. What's up, Jimin?" she says, and smiles softly.

Nine-year-old Jimin swallows. He shifts uneasily. Then…

"Mom, Dad left this same night six years ago, and you've never really told me why."

Jimin's jaw drops at his younger self's comment.

Why does he not remember this?

She looks taken back.

There's an awkward silence, and she painfully, obviously, has no idea what to say.

Jimin feels like smacking his younger self for causing his Mother so much discomfort.

But then, finally, she sighs deeply.

She looks down at the ground.

She stares at it for a few wordless moments.

And then…

"All things happen for a reason, Jimin."

Jimin's jaw falls open, and his breath stops.

That's exactly what his Mother's spirit had told him earlier on the Autumn pathway.

Nine-year-old Jimin, however, takes the answer a bit differently. His face falls in disappointment, and he awkwardly looks down.

Jimin suddenly notices how thin his younger self is. He never remembers being that thin.

"Yeah, Mom. Okay. I guess you're right," nine-year-old Jimin whispers in reply, and his Mother's face fills with sadness as he sees his son's obvious disappointment.

"Jiminnie, listen to me…it's not that I don't—" she reaches out a hand to her child, but as soon as she does, younger Jimin snaps his head up, his eyes a bit more narrow and his tone a bit more bitter.

"You know what, Mom? I think I'm just gonna go upstairs for now. I'm just gonna go upstairs in my room and listen to music and read or something. Okay?"

Then he flies around and dashes to the steps before racing up to the second floor.

Jimin is left standing in the empty, lonely living room with his Mother. He turns to stare at her and he swallows sadly.

She slowly lowers the hand she had out to comfort his son and lets it drape tiredly across her leg as she sighs. She closes his eyes and she shakes her head. For a minute, she just sits there thoughtfully and Jimin watches her, realizing how much his Mother truly cared for him and how much pain he caused her.

And then finally, she looks up towards the staircase, and as if her son is still in the room, she continues,

"I can't tell you why he left Jimin, because I don't really understand it myself."

And then, she stops moving.

For a minute, Jimin's heart races.

After all, he's not used to time stopping and starting so suddenly like this.

But then, as he watches his Mother's frozen-in-space form, he hears tiny, scampering feet and a jingle of metal.

His eyes widen and he flies around.

His face breaks out into a mind-blowing, humongous grin as he sees his new companion.

There, scampering up to him, in his favorite crimson red collar with his tail going 100 miles per hour, is Jimin's old pet schnauzer, Pepper.

Jimin falls onto the ground and holds his arms out.

"Pepper!" he exclaims, and as the dog runs up into his arms, he feels a few tears slip down his cheeks.

Pepper promptly begins his master's face in greeting, and Jimin giggles happily.

It's been so long since he last saw his favorite pet. Pepper died about two years ago after Jimin had him for over twelve years, and as much as all his friends made fun of him for it, he loved that dog so freakin' much.

Jimin adjusts himself on the ground so that he can hold Pepper more comfortably. He holds the pet so that he's staring right into his familiar chocolate-brown, loving eyes, and he just sits there joyfully for a moment, smiling.

Well, at least there's one good thing about dying. You get to meet up again with those who have died.

"Oh, Pepper, it's so good to see you again," Jimin whispers, and he pulls the dog closer to his body and nuzzles his face into his warm fur. "I've missed you so, so much."

Pepper tail hasn't stopped wagging since he first arrived, and at Jimin's previous words, he jumps up happily and Jimin's face.

Jimin laughs and wipes off the leftover drool.

For a minute, he and Pepper just sit there on Jimin's living room floor, with Jimin rubbing the dog's ears and Pepper sitting, all cuddled up, in Jimin's lap.

But then, Jimin realizes something.

He blinks; he pauses in scratching his pet's ears, and he his lips nervously.

"Wait, Pepper…why are you here?"

He hates to have such a pessimistic attitude. Really, he does.

But…A: he's always been a pessimistic person; that's just who he is, even though he loathes himself for it, and B: In this world, this, afterlife, so to speak, he doubts that people or, in this case, animals from his past show up to simply say "hello".

At his question, Pepper raises his head and stares at the staircase across from them. His ears perk up, as if he hears something.

Jimin leans forward a bit in caution and curiosity. "What is it, boy? Is there something there?"

He's not sure what could possibly be lurking in the shadows of his Death, but who really knows. It's more than likely something supernatural, and Jimin's not so sure he feels totally… comfortable with that.

All of a sudden, Pepper flies up. He darts across the carpeted floor, to the staircase, and races up, his collar jingling madly and his paw tapping on the wood all the way.

Jimin sits back in the living room, dumbfounded. His jaw hangs open, and he's still not really sure what just happened, but then he shakes his head and snaps back into reality.

He jumps up and sprints after his dog.

Without thinking, he races up the steps to his old home and flies down the hallway.

Then, he reaches it.

His old bedroom door.

It's half open; the space is big enough for Pepper to squeeze through, which is what Jimin thinks the dog did.

From inside comes a dull light, and it illuminates the pitch-black hallway Jimin now stands in.

But Jimin can't do it.

He can't walk through that door.

He just can't.

He can't walk back into his past, his room, the place where there was so much angst and inner-pain.

He feels like he'd be intruding on something…something sacred, almost.

So for a minute, Jimin just continues standing in the hallway, and he looks around and observes.

This…this world he's in.

It's so real.

Everything, every little detail, from the color of the walls to the tiny chip in the wood on the left side of the mahogany table right outside his door, is exactly like he remembers it.

And then, then, for some reason, he can't stand to be standing there, in the dark corridor, alone.

So he takes a deep, deep inhale, and he throws open his bedroom door.

He is greeted with the sight of his nine-year-old self on the ground by his bed. There is a book open on his lap, and he pets Pepper as the animal snoozes soundly next to him. There's a dim light coming from the lamp on his desk, and his room is rather untidy, typical of a young boy his age.

There are tears rolling down his younger self's cheeks.

As always, Jimin is not seen.

Pepper doesn't even see Jimin, and Jimin feels his heart drop as he realizes that those few moments back in the living room were the only time he was going to get to spend with his old dog.

But Jimin remembers suddenly, the quote that his Mother said twice before:

Things happen for a reason.

So he sits down, cross-legged, and he waits. He watches.

His younger self simply continues Pepper, and he flips a page in the book he's reading.

Then, suddenly, nine-year-old Jimin lets out a small sob, and Jimin's heart drops.

"I-I'm such a baby for crying, Pepper..." he whispers, and he tries to wipe his tears away and stop himself. "B-but I can't help it. I don't know why he would just leave. Am I just not, like, good enough or something? Did I fail in some kind of weird `be-a-good-son' test?"

Jimin looks away.

Feelings of worthlessness and failure he had bottled up his entire childhood are rushing back to him like a waterfall, and at the moment, it's a bit much.

"I-I just…I don't know…"

Nine-year-old Jimin closes the book he's reading and places it on the ground next to him. In place of the book on his lap, he picks up his pet. Together, wordlessly, the dog and the boy sit in the orange light, and the boy cries.

Then it happens again.

Time stops.

The moment is frozen, and Jimin dares himself to look.

He swallows.

Slowly, so slowly, he stands up.

Nothing is happening.

Nothing is becoming blurry; nothing is fading away. He's not leaving just yet.

And in that very moment, Jimin spots on the ground the book his younger self was reading.

A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens.

Jimin's eyes widen as the story's plot comes into his mind.

Scrooge was a bad person. Mean, selfish. He'd lost himself over time.

He needed to learn a lesson, so "ghosts" took him on a journey.

The Ghost of Christmas Past.

The Ghost of Christmas Present.

The Ghost of Christmas Future.

Jimin steps back.

His head is reeling.

"O-oh my God…" he whispers out, and he tries to regain his composure, but it's not working.

Because in that moment, he knows what all of this is.

The resemblance of that book and what is happening to him is too strong to be just a resemblance, and it is not a coincidence that his younger self is reading it right when Jimin comes to visit.

Suddenly, his world starts to get dark.

His vision is like a tunnel; he starts shaking; his body feels prickly.

He feels himself falling.

He's terrified.

He has no idea what is going to happen to him.

Then it all goes completely black.

All things happen for a reason, Jimin.