“… Oh I let you go because I was so sorry and thankful.

You don’t notice it but everything’s going well

You’re happy at least...”

“Yya! Where are you looking at?! Ah jinjja, you are getting expert to make me go mad!” This little evil scoffed impatiently.

I grab her palm, “Don’t turn your head.”

Jimin knitted her brows asking for further explanation, “What?”

“Yoona is right behind you.” I say in a very low tone. Still, no matter how hard I try to resist the urge to glance at her, I can’t do that. My eyes were like falling under her spell to keep stare at her. Yoona, baby. What if I tell you that I’m living in hell after I let you go, what will you do?

“Really? That’s good then.” Jimin’s eyes were sparkling like 100 watt lamp when I said that, “I haven’t seen her for ages I think. What if―” This little evil was almost jumping for joy and called Yoona to join us if I didn’t take her palm and kissed it.

Yoona’s eyes were darkened as she saw me kissed Jimin’s hand. Oh and that’s a relief that Yoona didn’t know that the girl I kissed was Shin Jimin. So she believes that I had moved on and I’m still being the old me―the cold heartless player.

“Please, just play along with me and I’ll pay for this, for sure. I promise.” I talk with my sweet tone as if I talk to my girlfriend. My eyes were sending codes to the little evil before me to just granting my wish while my hands were busy rubbing her palm gently.

“Ugh, really, Lee Jjong?! Really? I’ll make sure you’ll pay for this, you jerk!!” She gritted her teeth as her face turned red in anger.

“Promise. Just please, just please this time please help me, okay?” I plead with mixed feeling in my heart―my poor heart. I won’t beg to anyone else except her.

For god’s sake, what the hell am I doing right now?!

I steal glance to Yoona whom talking to her boyfriend with her aegyo. I sense a flame start to burn up my feeling. She has too much aegyo and I swear, I swear I can feel jealousy go up stuck in my throat to the point that I need more air to breathe in. My brain stopped working as all I can remember was the day when I daringly broke my castle and decided to believe in love. It replayed like a black and white film in my mind.

Do you still remember that, baby?

***

“Yyeeay, happy birthday to us!!!” Yoona clapped her hands after we blew the candle. She was totally happy with this little event she made for us. Today is her birthday while mine was passed fifteen days ago. I never celebrated my birthday because I simply didn’t like it. But she has succeeded dragging me here and forced me to celebrate her birthday while the fact is she already said that this is our birthday.

Her eyes were glistening beautifully with its size. Her smile was sweetly ear to ear and suddenly I feel like I was smiling with her. Her smile has simply made me smile as well. God, I think I can’t hold back my feeling anymore. Yoona stared at me as if she was examining my expressionless face and pouting, “You seem not happy. Don’t you dare to ruin my birthday, bad boy!!” She pretended to sulk with such cuteness.

This cake shop has girly mood for their interior design. The yellowish light from every corner of the white ceiling sent a warm feeling once you set your feet here. Sugar Street Sweets was located near her dorm at the end of the street. You won’t find such a crowded here and that was lovely. I snorted, “You make me here though you know that I don’t like this birthday thingy.”

“You need to learn on how to make people happy. The world is not only about you, Jjong. Being selfish sometimes is not a sin but if your selfishness eats you alive, you have to fight it. Just open your eyes and realize that there are so many people who love you.” She voiced out softly. That’s my Yoona. She never got tired to buy my bad side.

That’s my Yoona.

What? Wait. She doesn’t mine.

Not yet, I think.

“I don’t ask you to make me happy if you want me to do the same thing for you.” I scoffed indifferently.

“Did you being serious when you ask for my apology?!” There I know, I’ve pissed her off. Did I too much? Man, I don’t have idea.

“Did you being serious when you gave me your apology?” I raised my right brow to answer her. I hide my smile giving the perfect effect of my acting. Yes, people. I threw gravel to her window and asked for her forgiveness because I realized, I’ve overstepped the line after kissing her. That was hard to convince her that I was sorry. And now, I can’t let my monster ruin our good relationship.

She bit a piece of her cake quickly in anger and stood up all of sudden. Her eyes peered to me and I can see tears verging on her eyes, “You must learn how to treasure people who love you instead of hiding in your cave and accusing people could only make you sad, Jjong! I don’t know what you’ve been through but you are surely pathetic if you chose to live in your past!” She said with icy tone.

DAMN!! She got the point!

Her words were storming my mind and I felt like I’ve gotten a hard slap and heaven all at once. Why? Because she waken up my idiot brain to accept my past and let it go, but then she told me that she loves me indirectly. How on earth I was being this stupid?!

Yoona reached the door when I decided to get up and grabbed her wrist to face me. I can’t stand to see her sad face. For the first time in my life, I even can’t see a woman will break down before my very own eyes except that little evil named Shin Jimin. I don’t want those tears rolling down on her cheek. She parted her lips and spoke with such a really low tone, “What?! Isn’t it enough for you to hurt me over and over again?”   

I gripped her wrist, “I’m sorry. I don’t mean it.” I softly whisper. And how many times she forgave me to do such a thing and I always ended up to repeat it again.

I bet that she was so sick of me to the point that she even didn’t want to see my face. Damn, woman! Why do you have such a power to make me give up over my stubborn head? See? She’s different. I cupped the side of her face with my left hand so I can stare right to her eyes, “Do you still believe in love?”

I always questioned her about her believes in love yet I still can’t get rid of my hesitation. She was simply nodding while I sigh in relief, “Then please helps me to believe it. I’m sorry for always make you sad, I’m sorry for always make you cry, I’m sorry, I love you.”

She purses her lips as if she was suppressing all her anger for me. Her eyes softened before finally she hugged this useless man and I didn’t fail to see her beautiful smile before she snuggled up closer to me. I wrapped my hand to her waist and another one was caressing her hair. She mumbled under her breath but it still clearly attacking my ear drums, “You are a bad guy.”

I kiss her hair, inhaling the addicting flowery scent of it, “But you love this bad guy, right?”

“I hate you.” She tightened her arms around me sending a warm feeling down to my heart. I never knew that falling in love could be this beautiful. I never knew that fal