Jaejoong sighed for the umpteenth time as he buttoned up his shirt. He was getting dressed for the engagement party. He didn’t really want to go but at the same time, he knew he had to go. Both of them were too special to him. How did it end up like this? He started to think about when they had first met. Somehow, they just naturally clicked. Even though he was friends with the other girls, Eunhee always had a special place in his heart.

 

 

[Flashback]

 

Jaejoong, Yoochun and Junsu walked towards the practice room. They were getting ready for their concert.

 

“Have you heard anything about the girls that are training for debut?” Junsu asked as they walked down the long halls.

 

“Debut? Our company?  Trainees?” Jaejoong asked a little clueless to Junsu was talking about. The last few days, he had been so busy writing new songs that he hadn’t paid attention to what was going on at the company.

 

“Yea, they accepted a girl band and are planning on debuting them soon,” Yoochun explained to Jaejoong knowing how he can get when he starts to write music. “I heard they were mistreated at their previous company and they finally decided to quit and look elsewhere.”

 

“Mistreated? Like…”Jaejoong trailed off not wanting to touch this subject. Instead, he gave them a questioning look.

 

“Kind of,” Junsu responded. Both Yoochun and Junsu knew what he wanted to say. It was all too common how unfairly artists were treated in the industry. They’ve experienced it firsthand. “I heard it got so bad that one of them actually got hit for a mistake when they were practicing. That was the last straw for them. All four of them decided to leave.”

 

“What? They actually hit them?” Not knowing why, Jaejoong felt a flash of anger course through him. He hasn’t even met these girls and already, he felt protective of them.

 

“I know. I felt the same way when I heard about it,” Yoochun patted his hyung to calm him down.

 

“I heard management is having trouble with them though. They’re still a little shy and it’s been hard trying to get them to break out of their shell. They’re so afraid of messing up,” Junsu mentioned. He had ran into a manager earlier this week when he practicing.

 

“Maybe we can help them? You know, help them with training and debut. Hyung is the best at writing songs though. And you’re the best at guiding us whenever we’re in the studio. Maybe, you could help them when they start recording?” Yoochun suggested. “Maybe they’ll open up to us more instead of management?”

 

“Yea!” Junsu started bouncing with excitement. Jaejoong couldn’t help but chuckle watching jump around. “You want to meet them? I ran into them yesterday. They’re so polite and shy. I promised I’d introduce you two to them. I’m sure that’ll help them get out of their shell.”

 

“Yea, let’s drop by and introduce ourselves,” Jaejoong was thinking of what other ways to help these girls. “We could invite them to our practice so they can observe. That might help them alleviate any worries they might have.”

 

“Good idea! Let’s go!” Junsu started walking briskly towards another section of the company with his hyungs trying to follow in the back.

 

As they approached the room, they could some laughter from within. Junsu knocked on the door and popped his head in.

 

“Hey girls!” Junsu greeted them.

 

“Sunbaenim,” Immediately, the girls stood up and bowed respectfully to him. Junsu waved them off and stepped in.

 

“Yah! I said to call me oppa. You make me sound old,” Jaejoong and Yoochun walked in and laughed seeing Junsu pouting.

 

“Annyeong! I’m Yoochun,” Yoochun introduced himself. “Don’t mind him. He has a three year old’s mentality.”

 

“I’m Jaejoong,” Jaejoong smiled at the girls, carefully observing them. He could tell they were very nervous. “I heard you girls were the new trainees. We thought we’d come by and introduce ourselves.”

 

He watched the girls push their leader presumably in front of them.

 

“Uh … hi. We’re Alluvial Infinity,” the poor girl kept looking behind at the other girls. “I’m Ah Yeon. I’m the leader and I play the keyboard.”

 

“I’m Eunhee. I’m the drummer,” Eunhee was pushed by the other two. She gave a shy smile at the boys. At that moment, Jaejoong could only see her. Seeing as the other two were being shy, she decided to introduce them. “This is Hani and Min Hyo. She plays the bass and she’s our guitarist. Thank you for coming to visit us.”

 

“I told you I would bring them. Didn’t I?” Junsu tried to joke around with the girls to loosen them up. He could tell they were still wary of the whole situation. There was so much tension and awkwardness in the room.

 

“So … we were on our way to practice,” Jaejoong finally spoke up. Did he see a tint of disappointment in her eyes? “Do you girls want to watch?”

 

“Can we?” Eunhee perked up slightly. She looked at Ah Yeon eagerly asking for permission. Ah Yeon wasn’t too sure.

 

“Of course. It’ll be fun. Come on,” Junsu didn’t even give them a choice and grabbed Ah Yeon and Eunhee by the hand. Hani and Min Hyo had no choice but to follow their unnies.

 

For the rest of the day, they got to know the girls a little better. Slowly, they had started to open up to the three of them. It helped that Junsu was around. He kept trying to get the girls to call him oppa. It was pretty darn hilarious just watching them interact.

 

 

 

“Sayu,” Jaejoong acknowledged his good friend as she sat down next to him at the bar. They had met awhile back on a show when they were doing promotions in Japan. They got along so well that whenever they were in Japan they would make sure to meet up with her. She was like a sister to them. So when she started to work and do promotions in Korea, they were excited and eager to show her around. It was easy to talk to her. She knew what it was like and she understood them. On the flip side, they knew exactly the hardships and worries that came with working in an unfamiliar country. And knowing she was having a hard time making friends, they introduced her to Eunhee. They had become good friends and good support for each other. “Same?”

 

Sayuri eyed the drink that was his hand and nodded. “Jae-oppa, isn’t it too early to start?”

 

“You’re the one that joined me,” Jaejoong replied taking another sip of his drink.

 

“Touché,” Sayuri said quietly as the bartender brought her drink and left to attend to his other customers. She took a sip and made a face. “Oh, that’s strong.”

 

“Really?” Jaejoong took her drink and tasted it. “No kidding. Mine was so weak. Want to switch? That bartender probably wants your number. Ya! He even gave you more! Think you can get him to bring some more?”

 

Sayuri rolled her eyes at his teasing and took his drink. “Stop teasing the lightweight. You know I can’t handle too much.”

 

Jaejoong chuckled and agreed. “So how’s filming? They finally agreed to let you take a quick break for this? Aren’t you guys almost done anyways?”

 

“I have some more to film tonight. It’s our last week,” Sayuri sighed. It had been a long production and she was ready for it to be over.

 

“Another project afterwards?” Sayuri shrugged.

 

“Maybe. I love filming but I need a break. I want to get away from all this for awhile,” Sayuri sighed. She knew she didn’t have to explain how she felt to Jaejoong. He understood. “Anways, want to tell me why you’re here instead of over there?”

 

They both peeked behind them where everyone was. The party had started an hour ago and lots of close family and friends were greeting the newly engaged couple. Jaejoong shrugged it off and took another sip of his new drink. Sayuri didn’t pursue the matter knowing he wasn’t ready to talk. So, together they sat silently and sipped on their drinks in their own thoughts.

 

“Too stuffy ... I needed to get away,” Jaejoong finally broke the silence as he stared intently at his cup. Having known each other for so long, it wasn’t rare for Jaejoong to be so honest and open in front of her. She knew of his feelings towards Eunhee. “I …”
 

“I understand,” Sayuri squeezed his hand comfortingly, knowing how hard it was for him to talk about. She followed his gaze to the happy couple who were talking with a group of people.

 

Jaejoong looked at her, grateful for her companionship. They sat in silence for a few minutes before the peace was interrupted with cheers coming from behind them. They turned around and watched as everyone was cheering for the happy couple. Both Yoochun and Eunhee were smiling bashfully in the center hand in hand. Feeling the familiar tinge in his heart, he decided to drown it out with alcohol. As he downed his drink in one large gulp, he welcomed the sting that came with the alcohol. To his surprise, Sayuri finished her drink in the same manner and looked down, fidgeting with the cup in her hand.

 

“Sayu..” Jaejoong could tell something was wrong. She was never that good with alcohol. “What’s wrong?”

 

“Jae-oppa ...” Jaejoong could hear the cracks in her voice. Was she crying? He tried to get her to turn towards him but she refused to look up. “It hurts.”

 

At the moment, he finally understood. He finally realized why she always understood his pain without having to say much. Those tear-filled eyes that finally looked up at him reflected the same pain he felt. How did he miss it before?

 

She loved Yoochun … in the same way he loved Eunhee.

 

 

 

The silence was broken by another noise. Sayuri looked away and wiped away the tears.

 

“Mianhe. It’s probably the alcohol talking.” He was speechless. All those talks of missed chances and regret. She knew the feeling all too well. Forcing a small smile, she looked up at Jaejoong. “Oppa, I’m should go. I have filming in a few hours. I’ll talk to you soon.”

 

“Sayu,” Jaejoong reached out and pulled her wrist. “Do you want me to walk you out?”

 

“Kwenchana,” Sayuri shook her head. She was thankful for his support. “I’ll be okay.”

 

Jaejoong nodded and pulled her into a hug. “Call me later after filming. Arasso?”

 

“Arasso,” Sayuri murmured. She stayed there for a few seconds trying to collect herself before she walked away. “Gomawo Jae-oppa.”

 

Jaejoong watched her until she was out of his sight. Sighing, he knew it was about time to go back to the party and join the rest. Except when he turned around, she was standing there behind him.

 

“Eunhee-ah. What are you doing over there? Where’s Chunnie?” Jaejoong asked looking around for Yoochun.

 

“Oppa went to the restroom,” Eunhee replied softly. He was barely able to hear her.

 

“What’s wrong?” Jaejoong looked at her curiously as he stepped closer to her. She was acting strange. “Are you not feeling well?”

 

“Mm,” Eunhee shook her head slightly. “I’m okay. Just .. confused?”

 

“Do you want to talk about it?” Jaejoong asked her. She shook her head again.

 

“Oppa,” Eunhee looked at where Jaejoong and Sayuri were previously sitting at the bar.  “Are you .. with Unnie?”

 

“Huh?” Jaejoong didn’t understand her question. “She was just with me. She didn’t want to interrupt you guys and had to leave for filming. I might meet up with her later.”

 

“Oh,” Eunhee replied a little downhearted.

 

“What’s wrong?” Jaejoong tilted her chin up to look at him. He was surprised to see hurt in her eyes. “Eunhee? What’s wrong?”

 

“Nothing oppa. I’m going to find Yoochun oppa,” she walked away quickly and ran to Yoochun who just reentered the room. He watched as Yoochun fuss over her. Even he could tell something was wrong with her. Eunhee shook her head and said a few words to Yoochun before walking out of the room. Immediately, he looked over at Jaejoong wondering if Jaejoong knew what was going on. Jaejoong could only shake his head. He didn’t know what was going on either.

 

Or how we were (I’ve though it through)
Why couldn't I grab your hand and take you away? 
No matter how much time passes
You're supposed to be by my side
That won't happen anymore
 

 

“I heard they ended the party early. What happened?” Jaejoong was back at the apartment. Yoochun and Eunhee had ended the party early and he went home. Sitting in the living room, he started tinkering on his keyboard. Before long, he had a brand new song done. That’s when Sayuri had called. It was the middle of the night and she was still filming. Currently, they were taking a quick break to eat.

 

“I’m not sure. I think Eunhee wasn’t feeling too well. She was acting strange,” Jaejoong mused. He still couldn’t get over that look she gave him. Why was she so hurt? “Hold on. Someone’s here.”

 

Jaejoong went to see who was at his door. It was Yoochun.

 

“Chunnie!” Jaejoong greeted him and let him in. “Come in. I’m on the phone with Sayu.”

 

“Oh. Hi!” Yoochun yelled trying to greet her on the phone. “I’m kind of thirsty. You mind if I get a drink?”

 

Jaejoong tilted his head towards his kitchen and told him to go grab whatever he wanted. He gestured to Yoochun that he was going to finish his conversation and to make himself comfortable. Leaving Yoochun in the living room, he went to his bedroom and closed the door.

 

“Sayu …” Jaejoong was still bothered by the look Eunhee gave him.

 

“Hm?” Jaejoong could hear her chewing on something.

 

“She gave me this strange look when we talked earlier.”

 

“What do you mean?” her voice was slightly muffled from food.

 

“She looked ... hurt.”

 

“What were you talking about?”

 

“She asked if you were with me. And I told her you had to leave for filming.”

 

“Mm …” Sayuri wasn’t sure what to make of it. “I don’t know. I’ll try to call her when I get a chance.”

 

They sat in silence for a few seconds. Jaejoong was thinking of the best way to bring up what happened earlier today.  

 

“Sayu … Do you like Yoochun?” Even though it wasn’t the best time to ask with Yoochun in the living room, he wanted to know.

 

There was silence. She sighed. He could hear rustling on the other side of the phone.

 

“Yes …”

 

“I’m so sorry. I never knew ... I didn’t realize it was hurting you too when I talked about them,” Jaejoong felt horrible. Ever since Eunhee and Yoochun started to date, he would often meet with Sayuri and pour his heart out. She never said much and just listened. Yet, she was feeling the same way and she never let him know.

“Oppa, daijoubu.” Jaejoong heard some more rustling and people in the background. “Ah, I gotta go. We’re going to finish this scene. I’ll talk to you later.”

 

Jaejoong ended the call and sighed. Collecting himself, he left his phone behind and opened the door.

 

He was surprised to find Yoochun standing at the door. He looked hurt.

 

“Chunnie-ah,” Jaejoong didn’t know how much he had heard. “What are you doing there?”

 

“Is it true?” Yoochun asked him.

 

“Chunnie, I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

 

“Does she … like me?” Jaejoong didn’t know how to reply. Yoochun held up the song he had just written. His eyes widened. “Do you .. have feelings for Eunhee?”

 

“Chun …” Jaejoong didn’t know how to answer. He tried reaching Yoochun but he backed away.

 

“This entire time …” Yoochun walked away. Jaejoong tried to reach him again. “Hyung. Don’t. I … can’t. Eunhee … You … Sayuri … I … How .. did we end up like this? … I need time.”

 

Jaejoong could only watch helplessly as Yoochun ran out.

 

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