Wow. It's been forever hasn't it! I am so sorry about never updating anymore! I started a blog on tumblr with someone and we've been so busy with writitng and posting there that I haven't had time to come home and post what I needed to here. Thank you to everyone who loves this stroy and to those that still keep a look out for when it's updated! 'Benefits' probably has only one more chapter left and then the story will end. Let me know what you think so far. :D 

Enjoy this chapter! 

After your shower, you walk back into your room.  The thought of being melodramatic wouldn’t leave your head. Maybe you were just over exaggerating things.  Perhaps you just watched too many heartfelt dramas and TV shows. All of these feelings just had to be in your head. They weren’t real and you weren’t really feeling them at the moment. It was just a phase.

“Right?” You mumbled, throwing your towel on the bed. Your hair was the last thing you were worried about at the moment.

It wasn’t long before you heard the unlocking of your door and the sound of Jackson humming to himself. No matter how ‘cool’ he claimed to be, he was just an adorably sweet and caring guy to you. And you supposed he would think the same about you, no matter how sarcastic and y you came off as, he always said you were kind and sensitive.

The qualities you two never saw in yourselves, you saw in each other.

Hearing the door click, you felt yourself take in a breath. Jackson called out your name and your body automatically moved on its own. You made your way into the kitchen and watched as he put away the groceries that he bought on the way to your apartment.  He always worried about you not eating, especially since stress was slowly taking away your appetite with each passing day. You couldn’t help but smile at the sight of him struggling to remember what goes where.

Was this how it would be like to be with him? Coming home to him trying to help you tidy up around the house and restocking things that needed to be restocked. It was adorable and the thought made little butterflies dance in your stomach. Jackson Wang really was a good catch, but were you able to be the one to get him. You pondered the thought for a moment, but feeling arms wrap around your waist shook you out of your trance.

When did he get so close to you? You must’ve spaced out so much you didn’t notice him walking toward you.

“What’s going on?” He asked, rubbing small circles on your hips with his thumbs.

“Nothing much.” You replied, wrapping your arms around his middle and burying your face into his neck.

Oh how you just wanted to stay like this for a while and never worry about anything ever again.

“Are you sure?” He asked raising his eye brows. “You’ve been acting weird lately.”

“Yeah.” You replied, letting him go. “Just been really tired lately.”

“When are you not tired?” He laughed, ruffling your hair. “But that’s never affected you this much.”

You shrugged your shoulders and walked towards your fridge, pretending to be interested in what he bought. Grabbing a water bottle, you sat on the counter and opened it. His eyes were on you the entire time, but you pretended like you had no idea what was running through his mind. After taking a sip, you placed the bottle next to you and folded your hands in your lap.

“How was practice? Is everything coming together?”

“Eh. It’s alright.” He replied, walking towards you. “But it’ll get there. All it takes is time.”

Time. How much time did you have left before this boy drove you insane. By the time he finished his sentence, he was standing in front of you, hands folded across his chest. He looked impatient and bored. You knew he was craving for an answer to your unexplainable behavioral change but you just didn’t know how to express your feelings.

How do you tell someone you love them without having a heart attack?

“That’s good.” You mumbled, looking down at your hands. You let out a sigh and grabbed your water bottle. Your mouth was becoming drier with each passing second.

“I really don’t know what’s going on in your head right now.” He mumbled, stuffing his hands in his pockets. He was starting to look upset. “Can’t you just talk to me?”

“I’m catching feelings, Jackson.” You blurted, eyes avoiding his.

You felt the air around you tense up. You’ve never wanted to time travel so badly in your life. Jackson cleared his throat and nodded his head while staring at you. The silence only made you grow more anxious than you already were. Maybe you should’ve just kept the feelings to yourself.

“Say something.” You mumbled, counting the wood panels on your kitchen floor.

“What do you want me to say?” He said. “That I have feelings for you too? You know that this was a no feelings type of things right?”

“I know.” You sighed, finally looking up at him. “It’s not like I wanted to catch feelings.”

Jackson looked at you and his lips. The expression on his face told you he was annoyed and you couldn’t help but feel sick to your stomach. He was right. Feelings weren’t supposed to be involved.

“You know just as well as me how this is going to turn out.” He whispered, taking his snapback off and running a hand through his hair.

“How is this going to turn out, Jackson?” You asked, jumping off the counter and walking toward him.

“Not well.” He growled, grabbing his keys off the table.

Confusion and anger hit you all at once. Was he really walking away from this, from you? You couldn’t let him walk away without giving you an explanation. You caught yourself by surprise when you grabbed his arm and yanked him towards you. Jackson looked down at you like you were some sort of deathly disease.

“What do you mean?” You demanded, refusing to let him go.

“You know what I mean.” He stated, rolling his eyes. “We’re not going to work out.”

“And why not?” You question, curious as to why he’s so angry.

“Because you’re not really in love with me.” He rolls his eyes, trying to avoid all eye contact with you.

“What?”

“You know what. I’m tired, I just got out of practice. We can talk about this later.” He confesses, stepping towards the door.

“Okay, fine. Call me when you’re ready to talk.”

He slams the door shut behind him and you’re sitting on the kitchen floor. The burning sensation behind your eyes warns you about the tears wanting to fall. Sniffling, you furiously wipe your eyes and force yourself up. If time is what he wanted, you’d give it to him. You just hoped that this wasn’t going to end up messy.

You shouldn’t have fell in love with your bestfriend.