UP IN FLAMES
~ 1,105 w, g, angst, semi-canon (?)
odd parallels between changmin and yoona throughout the years and after

■ #1 - a song: nikka unni gave me broods' bridges 

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her

Yoona considers the root of their problem to be how disgustingly unfaithful they’ve been to each other from the very get go. But they are two individuals with no ties to each other; somehow they traded looks and carried on with their close-mouthed way. 

She’s spotted this little crack since they’ve learned the act of pretense. Changmin, might have too but if he did, like her, he did nothing.

If he didn’t though, then Yoona guesses it’s her fault for looking at things this way.

him

Changmin considers the root of their problem to be how disgustingly dishonest they’ve been to each other from the very get go. It’s so hard to see things for the way it is – to call love by its right name and say the words when you needed to.

He’s spotted a future when they first met. Yoona, might have too but if she did, like him, she did nothing.

If she didn’t though, then Changmin guesses it’s his fault for looking at things this way.

her

She’s not much for apologies and he isn’t either.

When they were younger, it used to be as easy as a ‘hello’ to know that they’ve forgiven one another. For Yoona, she will go on saying that she had nothing to be sorry for, especially not when it concerns Changmin. She should be able to do what she wants; it’s that kind of ideology that got her where she is – without him.

But it wasn’t cheating, was it? Yoona argued like she believes in those words herself. Seohyun never says anything back because she knew she didn’t have to. The silence to those questions says it all and it reminds her of the silence he offers her whenever they’re required to be in the same room. He doesn’t mean harm when he looks at her, at least Yoona doesn’t think so, but it doesn’t mean that she can stop plotting how to make him forget what’s not her fault in the first place (except it is).

If anyone ever asks, Yoona will standby her age-old testament and says she never loved Changmin, not really.

him

There are those rare days when Changmin thinks he’s finally beginning to forgive and forget. He’s less angry at himself, at her, at time and more understanding of her final decision to find something real, rather than wait for all their bridges to burn.

Then there are most days where he spends majority of it talking to the chair she used to sit in like it will absorb some of his resentment towards her. On these days, he’ll accidentally break a cup or two, drinks too much soju than he can handle and sew angry words together but never send the message. Changmin doubt he’ll ever forget how it all went up in flames, he remembers it better than the exact moment he fell for her.

He throws a tantrum, but never asked for any reasoning because he had no right to force it out of her. Changmin took his time but when he finally realized he was not entitled to anything and she didn’t owe him anything; he knew then that their only savior would be her excuses. There was none.

There will always be a part of him that points finger; that insists that she could have said more instead of walking away.  Changmin will go on playing the victim since that’s all he’s got left to do.

her

There’s this cycle they go through – kiss and miss and again. Yoona doesn’t know the definite number of the girls he called his own in between her loneliest hours – she could count it, she still can’t forget their name or their face but she should try at least.

(QIan is a kind soul who tried and failed to be the only one but held no grudge. Yeonhee is pretty, maybe prettier than Yoona, and had endless patience until Changmin ran out of his own and came crawling back to her doorstep. Yuri made it too easy with her overwhelming affection, in the end it suffocated him and left her heartbroken.)

She never could tell if it’s a good or bad thing; being the only girl standing at the end of the day.

him

There are things Changmin knows but deems them to be illusions of the mind of a lost man. He knows that the last person she kissed wasn’t him but the last person on her mind was.  He knows she’s got a smile saved up for him, he’s seen her let it slip once at three in the morning when she was too drunk to walk home. He knows the amount of boys and men and jerks who she’s considered to be her lovers at one point but none of them matters enough to her and leaves just as soon as she lets them in.

He swears they’re not made-up things he’s conjured up in his head when she’s not around. But these facts don’t concern him, they’re knowledge he’s gained over the years of studying her face, knowing them doesn’t benefit him and vice versa.

It didn’t bother him when Yoona batted her eyelashes at some pretty boy who tripped over his words whenever she looked at him. It did when she told said boy that she loved him after two months and not to Changmin after five years.

her

It’s sinks or swim for her heart, Yoona likes to think she’s doing herself a favor when she takes it from his two hands and gives it to another. Yoona can say it’s out of fear, what she did, but she can’t say she won’t live to regret it.

There were bridges that Changmin has made her cross – the one where she cares, the one where she counts on his friendship and nothing else and one where he meant nothing then everything.

Yoona confesses that she lit the very match that he’s been trying not to light.

him

There’s a howl somewhere after everything turned to ash.

Changmin considers it to be the ghost from their past; the part where he should have known but didn’t. He still sees it sometimes; that night she presses her lips to his window and he traces them with his finger from the other side. On the other side where the fog is engulfing her, Yoona lit the flame to their everlasting kinship.

Yoona went back the way she came – setting fire to everything she touched.

Changmin confesses that there’s no way to build up all the bridges that they’ve destroyed – not with her and not with anyone.

A/N: Welcome to all my readers! Some of you might have discovered this fic through the amazing, Nikka (nikatsu) or through my other fic (that I really need to update, 'I Don't Care, If You Don't or simply because you're a fan of Changyoon aka THE BEST SHIP EVER! Anyway so the first challenge is done, we usually plan to post every Friday night but if we can't because of whatever reason it will be up on Saturday. I know this isn't very long but I promise you all that througout this challenge, there will be some reaaaaaaaaaaaalllly long ones and some will be around 1-2k. I hope you enjoy, please subcribe, upvote and tell me what you think with a comment! xx