Tell Me When You've Reached Innocence
Hey Love, I Miss You.
One-Shot
[ Listen to First Love (Japanese Ver.) by Utada Hikaru ]
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She came running to his place the moment the bell rung and he was waiting for her by the large tree like he always did. She was panting by the time she climbed up that huge grassy hill, but she started to laugh anyway. He couldn't help but smile down at her when she collapsed on to her knees, her bag falling off her shoulder as she placed both her hands on the grass.

“Hey Love!” she greeted with a silly grin.

“Hey,” he replied with a small smile.

“How are you?” she asked him through gentle pants.

“I'm alright,” he answered.

“Good to hear~” she managed to say smoothly since she was able to catch her breath.

The two of them remained quiet for awhile, enjoying each other's company. She continued to sit on the grass while he casually leaned against the tree, his arms crossed over his chest while he also managed to cross his ankles as well. The silence was nice, the both of them listening to the gentle Spring breeze and the chirping of the birds, which echoed quietly as they flew away. Two content smiles were visible on both of them as they both looked up at the lightly clouded sky.

“Oh, Jaejoong,” she called out to him, which caused him to look at her from his spot against the tree, “I was going to tell you about my day, but I found something you gave me all those years ago.”

“What is it?” he asked her as he pushed himself from the tree and quietly walked over to her. She didn't say anything for a moment while she dug around her bag for something. He then plopped next to her, sitting Indian style before he crossed legs close to him while he eyed her. It took her a small bit, but she finally found the little object and pulled it out.

“Do you remember this?” she asked him as she moved her body so now she was facing forward again.

“Of course I do,” he chuckled as he watched her turn the little knob under itself, “It was my birthday present to you... With that song you loved, what was it again? Ah, First Love by Utada Hikaru.”

She merely giggled, that loving smile still on her lips as her eyes clouded over with nostalgia. He silently leaned over, his eyes glued to the little music box that sat on the palm of her hand as she slowly lifted up the lid. Soon, the quiet tune of the song started to play and she took in a small breath of air while she closed her eyes. During this moment, he gently tore his attention from the music box and stared at the side of her face. She had this angelic look on her face while she smiled and he couldn't help but smile sadly, his eyes glossing over with longing.

“I remember like it was just yesterday,” she whispered as she opened her eyes as turned her attention at his direction. Out of instinct, he pulled away, a rush of embarrassment on his gorgeous face as he faced forward again. She once again laughed gently, “Do you remember?”

“O-of course,” he answered as smoothly as he could, “Why would I forget something like that?”

And again, she laughed, “Of course, you'd never forget something like that, wouldn't you?”

“Never in a million years,” he flashed her a boyish smirk, which only caused her to smile and shake her head.

Soon the soft tune of her music box came to a slow stop and she didn't realize it until after it stopped playing. Frowning, she closed the lid and turned it upside down again before she began to turn the knob gently once more. Once she turned it until she could not turn it anymore, she gently flipped it back and opened the lid, the soft tune playing again. A deep sigh escaped from her lips as she stared at the music box, her lips still frowning as she parted them.

“This brings back so many memories...” she randomly told him as she lifted the music box to her eye level, “Do you know that before, I used to want to throw this silly thing at the wall?”

He turned to her, this guilty expression now on his face as he rested his arms on his knees and looked ahead, “Why would you do something as silly as that? I practically used up like half a year's allowance just to get that music box for you.”

“I don't know...” she admitted as she continued to stare at the music box, “Maybe because it brought back too many memories... So many memories I wish I could have back...”

“I'm sorry, _____...” he apologized, his tone smooth but regretful.

“You know...” she continued, “I hid this music box for a long time. That time, I couldn't bare to even look at it because it hurt every time I saw it... And I began to hate the song First Love. I accidentally threw my Utada CD that had the song... But earlier today, I found this in some of my old stuff.”

He remained silent, his attention at his arms but the moment he heard some quiet sniffling, he couldn't help but fist up his hands and anger began to build up. No matter how much he wanted to help her, comfort her or protect her, it was impossible up to this point. Everyday it had always been like this, even when she just came by to tell him about her uneventful day. He hurt her in the worst way possible, but she would still come back with that faithful smile and her beautiful laugh.

But in the end, she would always cry no matter what...

Turning his head slightly, he sadly watched as she leaned over and gently put the music box back in a safe place in her bag, her body still trembling as she quietly sniffled. Oh how he wished he could comfort her like before, but he was unfortunately forced to just watch her and keep her company while she brought her legs closer to her and quietly shed her overflowing tears.

For the longest while, they remained silent, well at least he did while she cried. She may not know it, but he was hurting as much as she was and he was just about ready to cry as well... Mainly because he was just so angry. He couldn't do anything for her anymore, at least, not in this state. But sadly, neither one of them had the power to do anything about it.

It was around sunset by the time either one of them realized it. She had been crying the entire time while mumbling her words of regret and he was forced to listen. That only got him angrier but alas, all he could do was just endure her feelings of regret and remorse. If he could, he would turn back time and change everything so she wouldn't cry anymore. It was his fault that she would cry... If he hadn't been so careless...

“It's getting late...” she whispered brokenly as she wiped her eyes with her hands, “I need to get going...”

“I know,” he muttered as he got up from the grass as well and stood next to her.

“I'll see you again tomorrow,” she smiled sadly as she picked up her bag and gently swung it over herself, “It's a promise.”

“I know,” he nodded, “You never break your promise.”

She hiccuped and smiled, “Hey Love, I miss you...”

“I miss you too...” he returned as he silently walked behind her and wrapped his arms around her shoulders, while she looked up at the twilight sky, more tears falling from her eyes.

“Tell me when you've reached innocence...” she whispered as she closed her eyes and had more tears fall.

“I already have...” he whispered back as he closed his eyes and disappeared with the gentle gust of wind.

She inhaled sharply, her eyes fluttering open as she looked down at the stone plaque in front of her... The name Kim Jaejoong written beautifully in front of it, along with his birth date, his death date and a simple quote right under that.

“And I bet it's beautiful...” was the last thing she said as she quietly turned around and made her journey back home.