February 1, 2009

 

      Today I woke up at around 10:00am and sat in bed. I sat there thinking what will be in store for me today. Should I go to the library and get a book? Nah, this place has a terrible library. All the books are about how to "help you" or "face you fear", boring. I walked over to the wall with the black marks and got my marker out and drew another black line next to the one I did yesterday. Ugh another one, hopefully I won’t stay in this hell-hole long enough to have the whole wall filled. I checked the calendar beside me on the table and saw that today was a Sunday. Usually on Sunday mornings at around this time, I would go to the park and take a walk in the grass and in the flowers at the most empty part of the park where there would be no one there but me, and this one guy. He would always just sit there and look all awkward and scary taking pictures of the same exact landscape. He would sit on the same bench an take countless pictures of the trees and flowers ahead of him. I never got a good look at him but he looked pretty handsome from his side view. 

As I was thinking about that guy more and more when there was a knock on my door. I stood up and went to open it. Eh it’s the "doctor" again.

 

"Hello! I see you've woken up already."

"Yeah, no " I mumbled softly hoping she wouldn’t hear me but sadly luck wasn’t on my side this time. 

"And you've woken up grumpy. Poor girl I think you need some food to make you feel better. Today’s breakfast iiiiisss......... OATMEAL AND EGGS!!!!"

"It’s oatmeal and eggs every day. Stop being so happy, it doesn’t even taste good."

"Well I’m sure it doesn’t taste good but I can’t change the menu so you just have to get used to it. Well I have to go bring breakfast to the other patients so make sure you eat okay? You have to say healthy. AND make sure you take your pills. ALL FOUR OF THEM okay? You need to stop skipping them, they can help you. I'll leave you alone now okay? Byyeee"

As she left I stood up from my seat on the sofa and walked over to the tray of food on the table. I took the piece of bread, butter and jam off the plate and threw the rest of it away along with the pills. They don’t even help me anyway. She always lies like that. Those pills make me feel even worse, they make me sad and plus the last time I took them, I think he didn’t like me taking them. He didn’t come back to visit me the last time I took them so I told him I wouldn’t take them anymore.

 

      I was watching sitting on the sofa of the game room watching TV along with some of the other patients I didn’t care about, then the commercial came up. My eyes slowly wandered around the room and over to the clock at the other side of the room. 2:45pm it read. Crap. He’s going to be there in 25 minutes. My room is about a 30 minute walk from here in the other building. I sprang up out of my seat, not caring who saw me and what they thought of me and ran. If I was late or if I wasn’t in my room at exactly 3:00pm then he wouldn’t show up. One time I got back to my room after getting some food in the cafeteria at exactly 3:01 and I waited for him to come but he didn’t come the whole day and I spent the rest of the day crying in my room because I was so excited to tell him about an actual good book I found in the library. I sprinted to the room softly mumbling various "sorrys" to the people I bumped into on the way. I finally got back to the room and checked the clock...... 2:55. Thank God. I felt so relieved I almost cried. Well if I got here 6 minutes later then I most likely would have cried anyway.

 

I layed on my back on the bed trying to regain my strength and breathe when I heard the door be bursted open and I nearly fell off the bed.

 

"YAHHHHHH!!!!!"

"YAH!!! Oh my God you nearly scared me to death. What the hell do you want?"

"Hehe Sorry, I’m just happy to see you today." he said with a cheesy grin.

That one line made me blush so hard and I don’t even know why.

"Ewwww you’re so cheesy. Don’t do that." I said as I hid my face under my blanket. He jumped on my bed and got under my blanket with me and stared at my face which made me blush even more.

"W-why are you’re staring at me l-like that?" 

"Because you’re beautiful." And I could swear that at that moment my heart stopped beating for a minute.

"Haha but anyways I got you a new book! I found another pretty good book in the library. It’s not about therapy for once."

I looked at the book, "Stolen".  I skimmed through the book a little bit to see if this book was good enough to read. It was about a girl who was kidnapped by her childhood stalker and taken to the middle of the desert where he lives and blah blah blah, she eventually grows emotions for this man. 

"This seems really interesting, good work Oppa." Yes I call him Oppa. I mean if he won’t tell me what his name is then what would I call him? 'Hey'? 'You over there'? No, I have more respect for other people than that so I call him Oppa and he doesn’t seem to care although he looked pretty flustered the first time I called him that. 

"Why Thank you baby." And yes he has a nickname for me, and it brings butterflies to my stomach every time he calls me. He never really asked for my name now that I think of it. He just eventually made up a nickname for me without me noticing. 

 

When he comes here, we would talk sometimes but usually I would just sit on my bed reading a book with him beside me with his arm around my shoulders, holding me close and we wouldn’t talk. We would just sit there together and I would be completely satisfied. I have to admit that over the whole time that I have been with him, I have fallen in love with him. I mean who wouldn’t have fallen in love with a guy that comes to your room everyday just to talk to you and sit with you? Especially someone as handsome and good looking as him. Fair skin, eyes that aren’t too big or too small, and a smile that could melt anyone’s heart. I still wonder ever since the first time I met him, where have I seen him before. I knew when I first saw him that I recognized him from somewhere but I just can’t seem to put my finger on it. I know him and I want to know why he seems so familiar.

 

"Oh baby, look at the time. I have to get going now. See you tomorrow!! Don’t miss me too much!!" oh I will

"I’ll try not to get too depressed haha. Bye Oppaa!!"

Well at least ill see him tomorrow. I walked downstairs to the cafeteria to get some dinner, yes it’s only four but I don’t like eating dinner so late. It makes you fat. As I walked to the cafeteria I saw this guy fall off his wheelchair from a step that wasn’t really that noticeable. I slowly panicked inside because I didn’t know if I should help him or ignore him since he was already getting up anyway, but being the nice person I am I walked over there and decided to help him up when a small "Ow" came out of his mouth.

 

"Are you hurt? Did you fall to hard?"

"Oh no I’m fine ha, I’m too clumsy I guess, I didn’t see that small step over there." His voice sounded like music to my ears I freaking swear. I could listen to him say that one sentence over and over again. Ey what am I thinking, I have my oppa and him only. He was actually really pretty when I looked at his face. Yes I said pretty. I don’t know. Handsome just didn’t seem like the right word to describe his face.  

"Thanks for helping me up by the way. I didn’t know there was actual decent people in this place. My name is Luhan. What’s yours?" What the hell am I supposed to say when someone asks me a question like that?

"Hi nice to meet you Luhan b-but I actually don’t k-know my name." it felt really awkward saying that since it’s the first time someone asked me my name and me not knowing it.

"Oh.... well I hope we can meet again sometime! I have to get back to my room or my doctor will get mad at me." He said with an emphasis on doctor. I assume he feels the same way about his doctor that I did with mine? He wasn’t as bad as the other people here. Maybe I’ll talk to him again. I went to get my dinner and went back upstairs and went to bed at around 9:30 since there was nothing else to do. Sitting in bed, my trail of thought led to Luhan. He has that "older brother" kind of feel to him. I feel like I could trust him right away. I’ll tell oppa about him tomorrow. I slowly fell asleep hoping that tomorrow would be as interesting as today was.

 

 

 

 

 

---

Chap three is uuupppp!!!!! Anyways, that book up there that he gave her is an actual book and its one of my favorite books. It is called "Stolen" just like what it says and what is up there is what its about. If your interested in reading it, its by Lucy Christopher. I will try to get up to chapter five by August 18 (my husband's birthday > <) yeah nevermind sorry :) okay byee!! Until next time!