Kyungsoo didn’t close eyes for the whole night. He knew something was off and couldn’t help but feel his whole soul torn between mixed feelings. First of all, the memory of a happy Jongin full of life didn’t leave his mind, he could see it reflecting in the mirrors, in the windows, in every time he close his eyes and yet soon after he saw a hand move… his whole world was gravitating around that hand move and it was suffocating him painfully.

“Please, be there when I come back. Please, Jonginnie.” Kyungsoo mumbled, tears falling in the side of his eyes as he laid in his bed. The morning came and he didn’t wait for the alarm to ring as he headed to the bathroom and took a shower. The effect was instinctive and soon he relaxed, despite the dark cloud surrounding his mind. He wore back his school uniform and went back to the school. He was shocked to find a lock holding four bars of the gates.

“Jongin! Kim Jongin!” his voice was torn due to his contact with smoke so his weak voice was barely hearable. “Jongin!” He got no answer, and felt like his heart was about to burst out of its place. He observed the wall for a moment and managed to find a way to climb it before shakenly and carefully jumping in the other side. He rushed inside, his breathe hitching in anticipation. He ran up to the roof without looking in the corridors and stood shocked in front of a uniform… in the middle of a lack of blood. Kyungsoo made each step with a painful thug in his heart, unable to breathe evenly, and fell in the ground before picking the uniform with a nametag he didn’t read to know to whom it belonged: Kim Jongin.

“JONGIN!” The scream of pain that left his lung was beyond his own strength and he found himself voiceless. He picked up the soaking in blood uniform and walked back to the fifth level when he noticed… for the first time since he got in, he noticed that instead of a red “monster” was written “To my little angel” in the door of Jongin’s locker.

Kyungsoo clutched tightly on the uniform before caressing the nicely written words. He opened the locker to find a paper inside.  Empty, he was about to touch the paper before noticing his red hands. The reaction was instinctive, and he didn’t know why, he smelled it while closing his eyes. He inhaled the irony stinky smell that filled his mind with many feelings he couldn’t describe.

He kneeled and folded the dirty uniform before placing it in ground. He swept his hands the best he could in his uniform, staining it with permanent red stains, and grabbed the white paper with shaken hands.

“To my little angel.

All I needed was to live once and you gave me that chance… so I’m thankful. I shouldn’t be, since I was the reason why many died yesterday… but I don’t care… because for the first time in my life, I smiled, I laughed, I lived, and mostly I had a real friend.

However, I don’t think I ever saw you as a friend, Soo. You are something more important to me than this which why I want you to live, I want you to have people around you, protecting you, and I want you to achieve all your dreams.

I want you to do so because I wished I can be in your place.

The school is locked which mean I am no longer locked to it. I am free now…

So, Good bye my little angel.

Good bye and thank you for every beautiful thing you made me feel.

Kim Jongin.”

Kyungsoo sobbed like a kid, loudly. He folded the paper and walked down to the first level stairs, sobbing still. He just knew it and it did hurt him so much. Why did I leave? He kept asking himself that the whole way to the wall where he managed to jump over. He didn’t care of who saw him, or of what they thought. He didn’t notice either that his clothes were soaked in a bloody red or that fortunately the dark blue color of the uniform didn’t show much until he reached the hospital where a tired looking Chanyeol, a worried Jong Dae, were making circles in the waiting area just at the right of the hospital’s door.

“Kyungsoo!” Jong Dae noticed him first. “You have blood in your hands; and your clothes are full of it. What happened?”

Kyungsoo was a sobbing mess. “I found his uniform soaked in blood.” He was gasping air in a very frenetic way, which made a poor old woman give him a cup of water he gratefully took. “But I didn’t find him. He left… he told me he left… he said good bye.” Kyungsoo said giving Jong Dae the letter.

Jong Dae was shocked to see that the letter was full of blood to begin with and had nothing written on. “Kyungsoo… you should be the one reading it. I don’t think he will like if I read it.” Jong Dae carefully said giving Kyungsoo the paper back. Kyungsoo was unable to speak, resting his head in Chanyeol’s chest while Chanyeol was trying to calm him down. “I’ll check on Baekhyun now. Stay here, Minseok and Jun Myun hyung will be soon here with food and drinks.”

Kyungsoo was sniffing by the time Minseok and Jun Myun came back, with a Sehun with blood shots eyes. “Oh! Kyungsoo… Are you okay?”

“Jongin left…” Chanyeol said holding Kyungsoo from saying anything. “Kyungsoo got a letter from him saying he left.”

“Oh~.” Jun Myun said with a sorry expression sitting next to Kyungsoo. “I know how close you were to him. I’m sorry…”

“Hyung…” Kyungsoo said sobbing again. “He said he lived and he thanked me for it but then he left. He didn’t even let me say good bye, he just left, and I knew it! I knew it, I swear I did.” Jun Myun pulled him into a tight hug.

“Don’t blame yourself for things out of your control. You couldn’t predict that your feelings about Jongin’s departure will be true.” Minseok said taking Chanyeol’s spot, while the boy went to Sehun and pulled the emotionless kid into a tight hug.

“I know.” Kyungsoo said, forcing a soft smile. “But at least… he lived, didn’t he?”

“What did you do yesterday?” Minseok asked eager to know.

The memory of yesterday broke Kyungsoo’s sad face with a fading smiley one. “I bought him food and he was so happy tasting them. He was jumping around, happy with the new tastes… I wish I had something to record him with it. “Kyungsoo started sniffing, in the verge of crying again when two hands made him look back at Minseok.

“You can’t cry for him all the time, you know. You have to live, like he ever wished to live. Do thing he likes, and feel things he wished to feel.” Kyungsoo looked at his hyung for a moment, realizing that it was actually what Jongin meant in his letter. Determination appeared suddenly in his eyes as he nodded and Minseok pulled him in a tight hug.

The school was condemned for months so the students had to change school yet fortunately, Minseok, Baekhyun who left the hospital three days after that incident, Chanyeol, Sehun, Jong Dae and Jun Myun ended up in the same school as Kyungoo, while Yixing found himself signing in a far school.

Kyungsoo followed Jongin’s wish literally, he lived his life fully, joining musical contests, and doing things he would enjoy perfectly with his friends. He maintained that Life style for seven years, until he graduated from his well-known Journalism institute. He wanted to be a journalist because such job will allow him to open the case of the old school.

As he graduated, his old school friends gathered to party about it, they made a small party in Minseok’s house, or to be more accurate Minseok and Luhan mutual house, since they both contributed at buying it, and by the end of the party, they fell in the couches, and the bean bags of the living room, bottles of beer in their hands.

“So what is your first case? Did you think of something interesting?” Jong Dae asked him suddenly; since, to join famous wallpapers team, Kyungsoo had to publish an interesting subject.

“I thought of opening the case of the explosion in our old school.” Kyungsoo said making them look at him in shock, except of course his friends who didn’t know about the Monster’s story.

“Didn’t you forget him?” Baekhyun asked him carefully.

“I don’t know… do I look like I did?” Kyungsoo eyed them slowly before eyeing Baekhyun and Jong Dae who exchanged glances at that moment “Did you forget him, Hyung?”

Jong Dae pulled Baekhyun closer and rested his head in the pillow Baekhyun was holding and the last caressed his boyfriend’s hair for a moment. “I wouldn’t be alive if he wasn’t there.”

Jun Myun nodded. “He saved the life of many students that day…” he looked back to Kyungsoo. “If you need help, I’m willing to help you.”

“Thank you, inspector Kim.” Kyungsoo teased earning a playful punch.

“Can someone explain to me what is it about?” Yi Fan, the eldest of Yixing friends, and Luhan co-worker, said sipping from the bottle.

“Kyungsoo had a crush in the high school.” Jong Dae simply said. “He was a ghost, locked in the school for thirty years and when Kyungsoo took him out of the school, an explosion turned it into ashes.” He looked back at Kyungsoo. “Do you think that Jongin had something to do with the explosion?”

Kyungsoo pulled his walled out of his pocket and read the letter loudly. “This is what he wrote to me. I don’t want to believe that… I think it was just a coincidence.”

“Why it’s so stained in blood… and where did you read such things?” Luhan asked innocently. “The paper is empty”

Kyungsoo looked up to Luhan and back to the paper. “You don’t see black writing?” Luhan shook his head and soon Kyungsoo looked at Jong Dae who shook his head.

“I didn’t read what you just said too. It was blank as well.”

“Then… Am I the only one seeing the writing?” Kyungsoo asked them in shock. Baekhyun yawned and rested his head on the sofa before looking at Kyungsoo.

“You are the only one with whom he had the most contact. I’m sure that fact on it own had some effect on you.” Baekhyun said before smirking. “Also, you maintained a salt free diet since then.”

“What?” Jun Myun pushed himself away, almost hiding himself in Tao’s chuckling self. “Do not tell me you never purified yourself.” Kyungsoo nodded. “Ew… It’s disgusting.”

“I didn’t see the purpose, since it didn’t have any bad side effect.” Kyungsoo said before taking off Jongin’s name tag that he picked up the same day he joined a new school from his wallet and pushed it inside his pocket. Luhan eyed Minseok in shock because Monster was written on it, in red, while Minseok made a small move to hush Luhan.

“But it’s… disgusting.” Jun Myun whined while Tao made his rest his head next to him.

“Shush, you big boy, and sleep.” Tao whispered making Jun Myun shiver but still closed his eyes at it. Kyungsoo observed as his friends fell asleep, each one of them in someone else’s embrace, while he was alone, cold from the inside out, and feeling his heart ache in anticipation. He was planning to start the investigation from the next day. So he did and left his friend to enjoy a nice sleep in the bed.

That night he dreamed of Jongin, like any night before but, the dream seemed so real this time. He saw Jongin walking out from the shadows and leaning to past a cold kiss that spread warmness all over him. When he opened his eyes, it was already six am and he had to make himself ready. He took a shower and went back to his flat so he can wear something comfortable. He prepared his block note, high tech recorder, a Polaroid, and handy cam, some towels to dry his hand in case he wash them, a soap, and Jongin’s name tag. He felt ready and sighed before leaving his place. The school was thirty minutes far by walk, and twelve by bus, and still Kyungsoo chose to walk. He was feeling his heart squeeze in pain, in every step. Jongin was a major change in his life, a source of pain since he loved the ghost… he never admitted it to any of his friends but he loved Jongin since that day. He knew he was in love when kissing both men and women didn’t trig anything inside him, like the memory of Jongin’s holds, or Jongin’s smile, or Jongin’s body between his arms when he hugged him for the last time.

He vividly remembered the hand move… that waving hand which made him fall into deep slumber. He remember it like it was yesterday and here he’s standing again in front of the iron gate but surprisingly… it was open and the school was open to public.

“Oh, Mr. Do?” a man said and Kyungsoo faced one of his old memories. “I hope you remember me, I’m the president of the student council and now the school’s director.”

“I remember.” Kyungsoo said with a soft smile.

“You didn’t change.” The man commented offering Kyungsoo to step in. “What are you doing here?”

“I just graduated from journalism school and I have to make an article about something interesting so I thought to make a small article about the explosion seven years ago.” The man’s face fell and he looked at Kyungsoo which rather cold eyes.

“Don’t get your nose into other such matters.” The man was about to step away, leaving a dumbfounded Kyungsoo but the last spoke fast.

“He disappeared. He saved lives, then he disappeared and I want to find him.” Kyungsoo said firmly. “Jongin is my friend… and I’m going to find out what happened to him.”

The man looked at him for a second. “I heard he left the school the moment of the explosion.” He said coldly. “Do that have anything to do with you?” Kyungsoo kept looking at the man’s eyes for a moment before nodding. It shocked the man deeply.

“I was the one taking him out of this prison.” Kyungsoo hissed. “And please, don’t make from the coincidence a generality. Nothing would have happened if Jongin left this ground sooner or later than this.” Kyungsoo was boiling, to say at least, and it amazed the man.

“Well, it seems nothing is going to stop you.” The man smirked. “The archive room in the fifth level have files you may need.” The man left Kyungsoo behind, and the last huffed before rushing up. First thing he did was to run up to the roof.

“Jongin?” he looked around but noticed nobody. He was about to step out of the roof when he felt it again. That thrilling feeling of being observed came back again and he looked back, looking around, making even the tour but found nothing. Disappointed, yet full of hope, he lazily stepped down before noticing that the lockers, which were white back then, became red, even Jongin’s locker but still he could notice some writing in one of them.

“To my little angel” was still written there.

He smiled, through the pain he felt recalling his loss, and caressed the locker. “Hey! That’s my locker.” The voice was unexpectedly familiar yet wasn’t. He looked surprised at a kid who approached him and gasped in horror.

“Jongin…” Here was standing a hotter version of Jongin, with brownish styled hair and normal eyes… especially normal eyes.

“How did you know my name? Anyway, why are you in front of my locker?” Jongin asked him and opened the locker to make Kyungsoo see that it was actually full of messed up stuff.

“The owner of this locker when I studied here was Kim Jongin… the Jongin I called.” The kid looked at the absent minded man in a curious manner.

“Do I look this much like that Jongin?” Kyungsoo shook his head before smirking.

“You are hotter.” The kid blushed and huffed before taking a book.

“Anyway, I have exams the next week so I have no time to waste with you…”

“Do you like to eat a fish snack?”  Kyungsoo’s question was instinctive and it made Jongin look back at the man in shock before chuckling walking away. It did hit Kyungsoo deeply.

His chuckle is the same… I know it is Jongin… my Jongin. However, he didn’t bother the kid at all, as he searched for evidences about his existence thirty years ago. First thing to notice, Jongin wasn’t mentioned in any of the records of the school since its beginning. Yet, he had a spot in the cafeteria… it’s bizarre. Why would a school hide the existence of its student? I am sure Jongin was human before… I need to know what trapped him.  He looked up from where he was sitting as someone got in.

“Oh! You are still here?” Jongin appeared with three other kids. “Does it bother you if we practice here while you are here as well?”

Kyungsoo shook his head. “If it doesn’t bother you then it doesn’t bother me.” Jongin nodded and Kyungsoo observed as the three kid opened curtains and revealed three wall mirrors, and soon music filled the silent space and Kyungsoo gaped at the dancers in front of him. His research was long forgotten as he observed the kids dancing their heart out and correcting each other before a break.  “Do you have an audition?”

Jongin looked over the man before shuddering when another kid replied. “Nah, we just prepare for our annual graduation ceremony. It has a kind of talent show part.” They nodded, before continuing their practice. Kyungsoo observed Jongin’s body swaying and couldn’t help and remember the sensation of Jongin’s body between his arms.

He noticed suddenly that Jongin was looking at him with in a deep manner. The way his Jongin used to.

“Stop starring.” The hiss made Kyungsoo blink and blush.

“Sorry… it’s just you dance so well…  I envy you.” Kyungsoo wasn’t lying to be honest. Jongin didn’t say anything and packed to leave as well as his friends when Kyungsoo noticed that it was night time. He stepped out and looked at his watch. “Oh, eight pm. I better head out of the school now.” Kyungsoo mumbled, while stretching his numb body. He took his Polaroid and snapped first a pic of the locker then a pic of the stairs heading to the roof top.  He didn’t look at the result and pushed the two pictures inside his bag before rushing out. He had to meet with his friends at nine pm.

He stood out to notice it raining and a surprisingly familiar man was standing in the rain. Jongin looked like waiting for someone so Kyungsoo stepped closer. “Let me walk you home.” Jongin made an annoyed sigh.

“Why do you keep on pestering me?” Jongin seemed annoyed, and it made Kyungsoo sad but despite the teary eyes that Jongin could see, the man smiled warmly to him as he stepped further and offered his hand.

“Come! I’ll buy you some Rice cakes in our way.” Kyungsoo stood there patiently waiting for Jongin to hold his hand and surprisingly he did hold his forearm, exactly where Jongin used to hold him back in that time. “Let’s walk under the rain shelters. You are soaked to the bones.” Kyungsoo took a towel from his bag and offered it to Jongin who took it and dried his face with it. They soon found themselves in a boulevard full of food stands. Kyungsoo pulled Jongin to one of them and pushed him to sit. Jongin mumbled something Kyungsoo couldn’t hear but he knew that Jongin was displeased. “Tell me about you; Jongin.”

Jongin’s face snapped up to the question and soon his face’s expression fell. “I have nothing to say.”

“Even about Dancing? Do you like dancing?”

“I do. I love it too much. But my parents disagree with my ambitions.”

Kyungsoo leaned a little and tilted his head to look at Jongin’s down expression. “They didn’t want you to be a dancer?”

Jongin absently nodded. “I secretly joined ballet classes in middle school but… since it was the first school to make such classes, I got caught by my mom and…” he didn’t finish while Kyungsoo held his hands.

“I know that your parent’s were against your dreams but… you are still dancing, so you can achieve your dreams and prove your parents wrong. I know you can.” Jongin shoved the man’s hand away, a shocked and angry expression mixed in his face.

“You don’t know me…”

“I saw you dancing, Jongin. I know what I saw. You became the rhythm and nobody truly made me see such passion.” Kyungsoo said crossing his arms and looking straight at Jongin’s eyes. A long moment of silence surrounded them.

“What is your passion?”

“Finding my lost friend, I can say it’s the biggest passion of mine.” Kyungsoo said leaning back. “I know you heard about the Monster… Jongin was that man..” Jongin was no longer in his sight but lost memories and his eyes shone in pure determination. “He’s the man who changed my life, who made me strong, and who made me fear no one. I still remember the first time I looked deeply at his red eyes.”

Jongin was amazed, as Kyungsoo looked at him. A completely awed expression was written in his face and it made Kyungsoo blush.

“His red eyes… they were tense, deep, and yet lost. I don’t know why he opened his heart to me, and I don’t know why he protected me from a bully, and I don’t know why he did get so close to me but I know why I did make him my friend, why I asked him out, why I made him smile, why I called him Jonginnie, why I rushed inside the school in the middle of the fire… I know. “

Jongin tilted his head curiously. “Why?”

Kyungsoo’s fierce eyes made Jongin looks startled. “Because I fell in love with him.” The kid went pale, but it didn’t surprise Kyungsoo. They didn’t say a word, as they were served and ate slowly and silently until the rain stopped, when Kyungsoo stood the first.

“Let me walk you home now. It’s pretty late for you to walk alone.” Jongin didn’t speak and soon they were walking side by side.

“Do you find it normal?” Jongin’s question made Kyungsoo jump out of his thoughts.

“What is it?”

“To love a kid with red eyes.” Jongin asked him suddenly. “I am okay with boy to boy love because in my school, there are some who… you know… openly living their relationship, so… it’s just… you are speaking of some kind of ghosts or monster with scary red eyes…”

“He looks cute with blue lenses.”

“Huh?” Jongin looked at Kyungsoo after the last’s outburst.

“Jongin wore blue lenses and he looked rather normal.” Kyungsoo said before looking at Jongin and smiling. “But I love his red eyes more.”

Jongin frowned. “I don’t get it. Why would you love someone so scary?”

“Because I wasn’t scared of him.” Kyungsoo said until his eyes were filled with tears. “The scariest moment that involved Jongin was when he waved me good bye… he had this expression… like he knew that I won’t find him the next day.”

“You went the next day?”

“Yes I did.” Kyungsoo admitted. “I went to the roof first, and I found his uniform soaked in blood, and then I went to the locker and I found his letter. I cried so much that day but since then I never cried again. He didn’t want me to cry. He wanted me to live the way he wanted to live.”

“I see. “ Suddenly Jongin stopped in front of a door. Kyungsoo didn’t see the door at first and was startled to see Jongin opening it. “Well, I’m home.” Jongin said smiling. “Thank you for the snacks and for the small chitchat.”

“Welcome. I’ll see you probably tomorrow. I am still investigating.”

Jongin nodded before sharing his cutest smile. “Good Luck with that.” Then he waved softly before locking the door. Kyungsoo absently walked away, thinking of the kid and soon found himself taking a taxi because he was damn late.

It was ten and half when he reached Jong Dae’s flat. “What the hell is the point of having a phone if you don’t take it with you?” Jong Dae hissed angrily.

“I’m sorry hyung. I won’t do it again.” Kyungsoo said with a tone of regret. They both soon made their way to sit in the living room, Jong Dae sitting comfortably in Baekhyun’s left and resting his head in his boyfriend’s chest, while Kyungsoo sat between Sehun and Chanyeol.  They watched the movie to the end before taking a small break and ordering take outs .

“So?” Kyungsoo snapped his tired head up and noticed Sehun excitedly looking at him. “What did you find?”

“Well, I didn’t find anything about the explosion in the school. I should see with the insurance company or the police. Nevertheless, I noticed that Jongin wasn’t in the student register since its beginning so… why does the ghost of a student hunt down a school where he didn’t study? Alternatively, was he studying there but no one did want to record it? Why? Such things crossed my mine. Also… I met a kid… he looks like Jongin, his name is Jongin, but he had no red eyes and seems more real.”

Baekhyun glanced over him. “What do you mean by more real?”

“Well… his hands are warmer than what I used from the… old Jongin.” Kyungsoo noted. “and he show more emotions than him.”

“Hmmm, that makes him look more human indeed.” Kyungsoo nodded.

“Did you take a pic off him?” Kyungsoo looked at Chanyeol then frowning he looked away.

“I didn’t.”

“What a shame.” The Chinese friends said as Yi Fan made a second movie.

Kyungsoo found himself sleeping in the middle of the noisy film, his head resting in Sehun’s chest literally. Drifting into dreamland, Jongin’s voice murmured. “Save me…” It made Kyungsoo jump up in fear. Sehun noticed the reaction and pulled Kyungsoo into a tight hug.

“Relax, Kyung. Just relax.” Kyungsoo noticed that he was hyperventilating and sighed shaking while hugging Sehun back.  He soon felt reassuring squeeze all over his legs, and looked at his friends trying to be silent while calming him down and he blushed hugging Sehun back. He soon slept in that position. The next morning, he woke up in a cozy bed and blinked in confusion when he noticed Sehun sleeping in the ground.

“Aish… he have a hurt back and still make me sleep in his bed while he sleep in the ground.” Kyungsoo ranted before kneeling in front of Sehun. He caressed the man’s hair softly. “Sehunnie?”

Sehun blinked before wincing as he looked over Kyungsoo. He smiled warmly and caressed Kyungsoo’s cheek. “Soo…”

“Hmm?” Kyungsoo was surprised by the sudden warm expression in Sehun.

They kept silence for a while. “Don’t get hurt, Soo. Promise me.” Sehun made Kyungsoo blush, surprised as well, and he pulled the kid closer before hugging him tight. It was one of the rarest things from Sehun.

“Why are you reacting like this all of sudden?”

“I am worried about you.” Sehun said pulling Kyungsoo so that both of them lay in the ground, and soon he faced Kyungsoo, resting his forehead on this hyung’s forehead, and sighing deeply. “I don’t want you to go deep in the investigation but I can’t stop you… can I?” Kyungsoo smiled and hugged Sehun back, making himself comfortable in Sehun’s embrace.

“I have to do it.”

“Why?” Sehun asked him, with a hint of annoyance.

Kyungsoo pushed his face away so that he can look at Sehun in the eyes. “Because nobody is doing it and… I love him, Sehunnie.”

Sehun let it sink deep and expressionlessly spoke. “The way I love you?”  Kyungsoo wasn't expecting it, neither the soft kiss in the corner of his lips. “I won’t steal your first kiss.” Kyungsoo blushed even more and felt his body shake. “I’ll wait until you let me… I know you will.”

“How about Chanyeol?”

“Chanyeol have Kris… they are together for two years, Soo.” Sehun frowned.

“But Chanyeol loves you. He always did.” Sehun chuckled.

“He told you? I got his confession but it was too late.” Sehun said as he suddenly caressed Kyungsoo’s face. “Someone else had already conquered my heart.” Kyungsoo pushed himself away, and a hurt Sehun observed him while he sat up, holding a groan of pain, and followed Kyungsoo to the bed where they sat, with a rather huge distance between them.

“Don’t love me, Sehun.” Kyungsoo said all of sudden. “Don’t love me now.”

“Why?” Sehun’s voice was clearly full of pain.

“Because I have still something to do. Just one thing to do.” Kyungsoo said sadly. He couldn’t bear being Sehun’s pain. “Please…” Kyungsoo looked at Sehun who had already a tear falling down in his cheek. It was all of sudden when Kyungsoo felt arms surround him and crushed him in a tight hug.

“Okay, Soo.” Sehun whispered in Kyungsoo’s ear, which made Kyungsoo smile in relief.

“Just… wait a little okay?”

Sehun pushed Kyungsoo away so that they will be looking at each other and Sehun nodded as Kyungsoo dried his tear. Kyungsoo stood and left the room while Sehun’s tears fell slowly and unstoppably. “Thank you for trying to cheer me up, Soo.” Sehun mumbled before falling in his bed.

Kyungsoo soon left the flat heading to his own flat and got a nice shower before dressing up nicely and leaving the house for the insurance company that he knew held the case of the school. The discussion with the company took the whole morning, and fortunately enough he managed to convince them to give him the case for a short consultation.

 He spent the whole day locked in a room taking notes and taking picture of what he needed to keep as evidence. Only when the company had to close its door that Kyungsoo noticed that it was late and that he spent two days without eating properly. “Baekhyun is going to throw a fit about it.” He went out and bought himself a snack, as he didn’t have time to go home and make himself a decent salt free dish, and rushed to the school. He stood in front of the Iron Gate, he was surprised to find a familiar looing old woman wiping her tears in front of the school. She noticed him and soon rushed away.

“Wait!” She looked at him in surprise as he stood closer and bowed respectfully. “Do we know each other, Madam? I feel like I did see you before.”

“No you didn’t see me before. You never did.” She said simply leaving him behind. He observed her fading silhouette fading in the darkness of the street.

“Kyungsoo ssi?” the voice made Kyungsoo jump in surprise.

“Oh I didn’t hear you coming.” Kyungsoo said looking at Jongin with his friends. “Aren’t you practicing?”

“We did. We had a free after noon.” Jongin replied as his friends left with a hand wave. Kyungsoo observed one of them for a moment, because somehow he felt like his brain was trying to connect some dots but didn’t manage to. “I didn’t see you this morning.”

“I was in the insurance company because I needed to see how the explosion happened, and things like this.” Kyungsoo said. “Did you eat?” Jongin shook his head. “Let me buy you something.”

They walked around for a moment and sat facing each other in a small restaurant. As the food came, Jongin stated something. “I will wear red lenses for my performance.” Kyungsoo looked up to him and Jongin noticed his shocked expression. “You gave me the idea.”

“Oh…” Kyungsoo took a bite, thinking deeply about it for a moment. “Can I come and see you?”  Jongin observed him for second before nodding. “Thank you. I’ll love to see red eyes again.” The silence that fell after that made Kyungsoo feel heavy and Jongin sigh.

“Do you miss him?”

“I do, and so badly.” Kyungsoo sighed as well. “I never forgot him…”

“I can see that.” Jongin said resting his back on the chair. “I wish someone would do the same to me… when I had time to.”

Kyungsoo didn’t get it so he frowned. “Why are you saying so? It’s not too late. You are still a kid…”

“You had my age when you loved him.” Kyungsoo blinked in shock.

“You are fifteen??? I thought you were seventeen or eighteen.”

Jongin made the most beautiful sound Kyungsoo ever heard, a laugh that echoed in his soul and filled the space with rainbow butterflies. “I’m Sophomore.”

“Oh! I see.” Kyungsoo blushed, smiling slightly. “If you need so help for the exams, you can ask me. I’ll help you.”

Jongin kept his smile for a while. “I am fine. If I make it in the top three in the talent show, I may have some extra grades and guarantee my position in the top 50.”

“Oh you are in the top 50? Good.”

“Yeah… It’s good to be in the top fifty in your school, you know. It gives you some freedom.” Kyungsoo felt like someone took a hold of his heart and squeezed it hard. “What? Did I say something wrong?”

“No… I just got a sudden flash back.”

“It’s good to be the top 50 of your school, you know.” Kyungsoo said with a happy smile. “It give you some freedom.”

“Freedom?” Jongin asked him curiously. “I didn’t know you felt locked up in that school.”

“Well, weren’t you?” Kyungsoo asked him innocently.

“Did you ever feel like you were locked in the school?” Kyungsoo asked Jongin suddenly. The kid observed the man in front of him before looking absently away.

“Every student thinks the same.” Jongin said with an absent tone. “All I want is to have time for dancing but because of the studies I have to short it out…”

“I hope I’m not wasting your time…” Kyungsoo’s words were caught in his throat as Jongin looked at him with such strange expression.

“You are not.” Jongin’s voice was firm, hinting that he will not hear any discussion about it. Kyungsoo blushed madly and Jongin smiled. “You are cute, you know. Cute like an angel.” Kyungsoo looked at Jongin and felt warmness rushing all over his body, as he blinked in surprise and showed a shy short smile afterward. They finished the meal and stood to leave. “Can we not… go home?”

Kyungsoo looked at Jongin and smiled nodding. “Where do you want to go?”

“Anywhere.” Jongin said stepping ahead and looked in front of Kyungsoo, reaching for the man’s hand. “I don’t want to go home now, so let’s go somewhere nice.”

“As what?” Kyungsoo almost ran to catch up with Jongin’s pace.

“As a park, the bridge… let’s go to the Han, it’s like thirty minutes’ walk ahead.” Jongin said and soon held Kyungsoo’s hand properly. Kyungsoo was surprised by it and looked down to their hands while tightening softly his hold. Jongin looked at him and smiled warmly. “You know, I barely believe that you are older than me… you look so young.”

“I didn’t change much since graduation.” Kyungsoo admitted. “It seems that my age is sealed by the events in that year.”

“As if … you became an immortal being locked in a world where you don’t belong?” Jongin’s words made Kyungsoo shiver all of sudden.

“Somehow …”

“Could it be true?” Jongin asked him again. “I mean, what if you are actually not living in your world but in someone else’s world?”

“It sounds pretty bad but I would live in this world to the end.” Jongin froze and Kyungsoo faced him. “It doesn’t matter in which world you live, as long as you live it.” Jongin freed Kyungsoo’s hand and stepped back, tears rushing in his eyes.

“You are a liar. It matters! It always matters!” Jongin ran and Kyungsoo found himself running behind a fading silhouette. However, Jongin was nowhere to be seen.

“JONGIN!” For the second time of his life, Kyungsoo felt completely empty…