Dark Feathers ~[HIATUS]

Description

What happens when a misunderstood man meets a happy-go-lucky girl in a world of tragedy?

Another Romeo and Juliet? or are they writing their own story?

Foreword

CHARACTERS

 

You/Reader: a simple girl, always looking on the bright side of everything and always has an optimistic smile on her face.

 

G.O. : A guy seen as simply mysterious. His voice is soothing and beautiful, yet he is still misunderstood as a bad guy.

 

 Preview:

I let my feet step onto the flooded, darkened pavement. The street lights were reflected in the pool of rainwater below my feet, almost like it was creating a lighted, walkway for me to enter the première hall - although in that situation, it fitted in with more blood red then red-carpet red. And even though the street lights were designed to make everything brighter, right then it felt even more darker than ever. Even the moon itself was hiding behind a nearby cloud and the stars had refused to waken.

Inside of me I felt a sudden rush of nervousness overcome me. I closed my eyes and let my body breath in air so that my nerves were flattened as much as I could make them, however, I could still hear the shaking in my breath. I felt the salty rainwater that was surrounding me from the clouds above me, dribble down my eyelids and cheeks. My, long, dark hair soaked up the water as it fell, letting beads of water drip off the ends silently.

I opened my eyes slowly and gazed at the dark silhouette in front of me, his firm frame facing away from me. The rain that had fallen onto him had soaked his clothes, fitting closely to his body. I noticed then how broad his shoulders were. How masculine he really was. I suddenly felt something different at that moment. Desire perhaps. Or maybe it was just lust.

I took a step forward, towards him. I saw his back muscles tense up, probably because he had sensed my presence. His head moved to the side so that I could see his face at side profile. I noticed then the jewels of water drip from his straight, jet-black hair. His eyes, however were shadowed over and I couldn't recognise any expression on his face.

I opened my mouth slowly to try and say his name but he dropped his gaze suddenly and heard him whisper, "I shouldn't be doing this."

I felt something inside of me flip and my breathing began rapidly increasing. His face was now, again facing away from me, yet I still felt my voice sound out, "What?" My voice cracked and I felt my eyes create their own rain.

I saw him shake his head and heard sobs escape from his mouth. The tears inside of me began to start streaming down and I wanted to look away; run away; just go somewhere away from this insecurity. But I couldn't - my eyes were fixed on him. I felt some sort of connection with him and somehow, a way of protection. That was just what I wanted. For his arms to surround me and promise to secure me with him forever.

And I wanted that now.

I felt my feet start walking towards him, a slow pace, but as he started shouting at himself, saying, "I can't be doing this? Why am I doing this?" my feet began to speed up. Soon, my feet were running, faster and faster towards him - I just wanted to wrap my arms around him; to have him; for me to feel him around me; to be his. And yet, I felt my voice suddenly rise in response with, "What? Doing what?!" as approached him , this feeling of anxiousness and pleading desperation for his touch all swirling together with the rain that fell around us.

But suddenly, my feet halted to a stop when his voice, almost instantly, so he wouldn't prevent himself from saying the words if he waited any longer, shouted, "Falling in love with you!"


 

Comments

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magnaeline
#1
update please
mirjoona #2
I looooove your writing style!! :D
aliiki
#3
heehee hi there =D<br />
<br />
i think this fic has definitely got potential. sorry if i'm not making a simple comment saying it's good and im waiting for more (which is true) but it's always difficult to find readers who will help improve writing (i say this in the most loving way)<br />
<br />
i think the tone is perfect for this type of fiction. its very descriptive and in depth, which is always a good fundamental for a piece. However, in both this chapter and your preview, i noticed one thing in particular. it's always tempting to use "i" because you're talking in first person and when you write, you don't really catch it. i have trouble with repetitiveness as well, but try to vary sentence structures, this will help you stray away from starting sentences with "i" and "my."<br />
<br />
hope this helps! can't wait for updates =]
loving_eida #4
not cheesy :lol: i love G.O . thanks for this fic !
hyeamazing #5
Wahooo!!!!! Finally a G.O story...I just loveeeee him! <3 I'll get to the first chapter ASAP! <3
Accidentally_in_love #6
thank you everybody for you awesome comments!! It makes me sooo happy ^_^
MChex5
#7
*mblaq*<br />
lmao typoo... -_-
MChex5
#8
gosh your writing style is awesome and cant wait to read^^<br />
btw i think i will fall for mblaw cuz of this story ;)<br />
update soon kimi^^
ChristalSJ #9
Woah! Nice! I like it! Please update more!~ <3 ^^
mblaqism #10
G.O looks soo hot in the poster haha<br />
really liking your story so far!<br />
waiting for your first chapter :)