After seeing one another again, I didn’t speak with Sungjong again until two days later when he texted me early in the morning. I sat up in my bed and read it carefully. 

‘Hi, Myungsoo. I’m sorry for flipping out on you the other day. You didn’t do anything. I’m just a little screwed up right now and it’s hard to talk about things. Am I making any sense? Anyway, I’m sorry if I hurt you. You said something the other day about finding out what really happened. I think we should do that. No one else will, and everyone will continue to think it was an accident. Another thing…STOP blaming yourself! It wasn’t anyone’s fault, okay?’ 

I set my phone down with a sigh, shaking my head. He didn’t blame me and he was willing to find out what had killed Daeryong, but I still couldn’t let go of the guilt I felt over it. Dismissing the thought exactly as I had every day for the last two years, I hit reply. 

‘Hey, Sungjong. Thank you for talking to me again. I wasn’t in the best mood the other day and I’m sorry if I was insensitive. It was so good to see you again. I have missed you. I also don’t blame myself. Don’t worry. Would you like to meet for breakfast?’ I sent the reply, lying to him about not blaming myself. I really did, and was still depressed about it. However, I was going to continue burying my guilt and blaming myself. 

Sungjong replied right away. ‘I think that sounds good. How does 9:00 sound? Hoya already left for work, so I’m by myself. What about that little diner that we used to go to? I don’t remember the name, but I know where it is…’ 

I smiled, remembering the diner that we used to go on dates to. I couldn’t remember the name, either, but it had amazing memories. With some luck, maybe it will be able to rekindle some of the fire we once had for each other. ‘Sounds great. I’ll see you at 9:00.’ I got dressed in casual clothes and grabbed my keys, ignoring the tightness in my stomach. There was nothing to be worried about. 

We met at the diner and ate in silence until Sungjong broke it with a discussion about the food and that they still had some of the old dishes. We didn’t talk about the past or Daeryong’s death, so it was comfortable. He told me about the job he had started almost a year and a half ago at a clothing store, and about how he could get discounted clothes now. He was also a department manager, which was very good for his paycheck. I smiled, remembering how much he loved clothes. A job like that suited him well, and I told him that I would be visiting the store to by from him. I would ask for him specifically. I didn’t have anything new to tell him, since nothing had changed in my life since we had seen one another, except that I had gotten a few jobs as a photographer, which honestly didn’t really pay much. It was all under the table, at the moment. I hadn’t realized how much I had stayed in place without moving forward. My life was almost exactly the same as it had been before, just with added guilt. I felt like a loser without any more to offer than I had been able to two years ago. 

When we were leaving, Sungjong touched me lightly on the small of the back. The action caused a chill to run down my spine. He still affected me the same way, and it was making me hot. Taking a deep breath, I smiled at him. “Breakfast was nice. We should do that again.” I grinned at him, hoping that my face wasn’t too badly flushed. 

Sungjong nodded, staying strangely silent. He seemed to be deep in thought. After a moment, he smiled back. “Yeah…it was nice. What would you think about going to the lake? Maybe we can find some answers. I can see on your face that you never resolved it, and neither did I. It could be good for both of us, you know?” 

I bit my lower lip, running my teeth around it thoughtfully. I blushed again when I noticed that Sungjong was watching me. “Um…yeah. I agree that it could be good. Let’s go.”

Sungjong was still staring at me and he laughed softly. 

“What?” I asked, cocking my head. 

“You,” he shook his head. “You’re reactions haven’t changed at all. I like that.” 

I noticed that he didn’t have a vehicle here, and concluded that he must have taken the bus. “Hey, do you want to ride with me? That would save you a dollar.” 

Sungjong smiled,