Hakyeon doesn't ever know if Hongbin means what he says or not. He's never really thought about the genuineness of his words because he was too busy putting on his own band-aids to care. The only thing he did know was that Hongbin said those things and he was left to clean himself up.

He just wondered sometimes. He wondered today, and he wondered last night. He wondered if it was some kind of plea for attention, or maybe for help. It couldn't have been from loneliness, but his hunch was from self-consciousness.

Hakyeon wasn't self-conscious, or he tried not to be anyway, but it was so hard sometimes. Sometimes, when he was standing in the mirror. Sometimes, when he was in the shower. Sometimes, when he was backstage before a performance. Sometimes. However, it seemed to him that Hongbin was self-conscious all the time.

All the time, when he was laughing with Hyuk and Wonshik, all the time when he was brushing his teeth in the mirror with a toothpasty smile. All the time, when he was active in the gym.

If Hongbin was self-conscious all the time, Hakyeon sort of wished he could be too.

"What are you doing, hyung?" Hongbin asked. Hakyeon was sitting on the couch with a book in his hands. He wasn't reading it, not really, it was just there to make it look like he wasn't trying to make is way through his tangled thoughts.

"Being flawless, as usual." he replied, sounding bored.

Hongbin snorted and Hakyeon's eyebrow twitched. He looked up. "Is there something you need, Binnie?" he asked with a painfully cheerful smile.

Hongbin shrugged and rubbed his neck. All the time was now, for sure. Hakyeon sighed and patted the seat next to him. His stomach twisted a little and told him just to send Hongbin away to bother Jaehwan, or maybe Taekwoon, but here he was. Always accommodating, adjusting, forgiving.

They sat together on the couch, Hakyeon with his legs stretched out and Hongbin with his folded in so tightly that he took up such a small part of the cushion almost like he wasn't quite there, or maybe didn't want to be there. Hakyeon didn't blame him, he guessed. He didn't really want him there right now either but he was lenient, and he was accepting, so it was half-alright.

"Hyung . . . ?" Hongbin asked, and he sounded so tiny and fragile.

Hakyeon shrugged his shoulder lightly and Hongbin laid his head down, his soft pink hair tickling Hakyeon's skin and his cool cheek coming in contact with warmth. Maybe Hongbin was only self-conscious sometimes, just like him.

"It's okay Binnie," he murmured with a sigh, beginning to adjust himself yet again. He pulled up his arm to circle it around Hongbin's shoulder, pulling his shrunken figure closer until they were huddled together.

Hakyeon protectively wrapped himself around Hongbin, just like he had before, just like he always would.

But it felt a little better when Hongbin became the bigger of them, and suddenly he was the tiny one—and instead of Hakyeon's shirt getting wet this time, it was Hongbin's.